Youth
by Brianna Jackson
Summary: Modern AU; A look at the trial and tribulations of young love.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

"setting_ fire to our insides for fun, collecting names of the lovers that went wrong."_

_14-15: Freshman year_

Peeta Mellark first sees Katniss Everdeen the first day of ninth grade from across the courtyard.

He notices her immediately, his eyes scanning the crowd for Finnick who was waiting for him by entrance but landing on her instead. Her skin was pale, olive almost but her hair was dark, eyes grey like the kids from the Seam. But he had never seen her before. There was no doubt he would've remembered the beautiful girl who sat quietly by herself, her nose in a book that probably weighed more than she did.

She must be new. He had lived in Panem all his life and it wasn't a big town. He would have noticed her. He sure as hell noticed her now.

Finnick tugging on his arm breaks his attention away from the mysterious girl. "Come on man, we have to get to class," he groans.

Finnick Odiar has been his best friend since Miss Trinkets kindergarden class nine years ago. Finnick had matured much before Peeta and his other friends, already gaining a large amount of attention from the female student body of Panem High. His swimming abilities had also put him in with most of the upperclassman. Already, he was someone you wanted to associate yourself with. Peeta was glad he had been all these years. It was making the transition from his older brothers shadows into his own light much easier.

"What's got your dick all hard," he jokes. But Peeta takes a quick glance down to make sure. The last thing he needed was to walk through those doors with a hard-on for all of Panem to see. His brothers would surely never let him live that down.

"Do you know who that is?" Peeta asks, nodding his head over to the girl who has begun to pack her things into the worn leather book bag she was carrying over her shoulder.

Finnick shakes his head, his eyebrows knitting in confusion. "Looks like a Seam kid," he mumbles below his breath. Peeta checks anxiously over his shoulder, making sure no one heard the remark. It was true. Most Seam kids had the grey eyes and dark hair she had but the comment could easily unsettle someone if they were overheard, make for a tense first day which Peeta wasn't looking forward to. "She's probably new."

...

As luck would have it, when Peeta walks in to his fifth hour class, she's sitting alone in a seat by the window, absentmindedly playing with a strand of her hair which has come lose from her braid. Peeta wishes he had taken the piece of gum Marvel offered him at the end of lunch.

Before anyone else has the chance, Peeta takes a seat beside her, ignoring the calls from Thresh in the back of the room that he's saved him a seat. Peeta discovers she's even more beautiful up close, her face dotted with freckles but other than that, completely clear. She doesn't paint her face with makeup like Glimmer and Clove do. She doesn't need too.

She stiffens when he sits down, obviously hoping she would be able to keep the table to herself. There were plenty of open seats around the english classroom, ones that might suit him better like the table in the back with his friends. But he has no desire to move away from the girl with the braid.

"Hi," he says after awhile, the bell cutting him short and he's not sure if she heard him. "Hey," he tries again.

She just smiles, not genuinely but just enough to be polite. Her eyes darting back out the open window where two birds are making a nest in the tree that grows just outside the classroom.

Miss Scranton begins to speak then, passing out syllabuses and pieces of paper that ask generic, first day of school questions that no one answers seriously. He pulls a pen out of his bag, scribbling his name along the top line, answering the questions with answers that he believes will suffice the teacher, occasionally darting over to her paper which remains blank, not even a name on the space provided.

"Do you need to borrow a pencil?" Peeta whispers into her ear, relinquishing the one writing device he has in his possession. But he doesn't mind giving it to her.

She accepts it hesitantly, as if the pencil were more than just that. His fingers graze hers as she does so, a fire igniting throughout Peetas body, heading straight for his groin. He groans inwardly, wondering how he is ever supposed to have sex if he's unable to even touch a girls hand without going hard. He should ask his brothers, start training his body so that when the day comes, he won't embarrass himself or the family name.

Thinking about Miss Scranton's plump body momentarily distracts him from his arousal, killing the previous state he was in and making it easier to focus on the words she says as she explains the concept of Pre-AP English I. His eyes dart over to the girls paper, not a single thing written on the sheet of paper. Nothing but the fact that she has one sister under her "siblings" category on her paper. Her name is Primrose.

Miss Scranton moves to the back of the classroom, whispering something to Thresh about not accepting inappropriate answers on the questionnaire, scolding him for drawing penises under the section which says "my favorite things". Peeta can't help but laugh and when he looks to his right, the girl is as well, a real smile.

"Thresh is a jackass," Peeta jokes, dodging the waded piece of paper that comes flying his way from the general direction. She laughs, unrolling the ball of paper, reading aloud the message Thresh had written on the inside.

"He says 'not my fault she's never seen one before'." She laughs, a real laugh, her face going red. Miss Scrantons' eyes flash towards them, Peeta shoving the note into the pocket of his jeans before she has a chance to spot it from across the room. After a while, she goes about her business.

When Peeta chances a look back at Thresh, he fakes a jerking off motion in his general direction, not stopping until Cato, who Peeta hadn't even noticed, joins in, resulting in their automatic detention. Peeta shakes his head. The first day of school is going well for them.

"You have interesting friends," she says, nodding towards the two boys who now have to sit in the front of the classroom.

Peeta nods his head excitedly, pleased she is actually speaking to him and not giving her attention towards the birds still hard at work outside the window. "I'm Peeta Mellark, by the way," he greets, moving his hand from his pocket to shake hers. Her fingers are cold and nimble, a ring on her middle finger shining in the sunlight that falls from the window. He wonders who it's from. A boyfriend, maybe?

"Pita? Like the bread?" Everyone always asks this, mostly because they know he is the bakers son and they find it strange. But his brothers name is Rye. The others is Wheaton. Peeta feels like he got the good end of the stick on that one.

"Yes. Believe it or not, my parents own the bakery in town," he informs her, watching the slow smile that spreads across her face. He's convinced it's the most beautiful thing on earth. "But you spell it P-E-E-T-A. They did try and add some variety."

"Well my mothers name is Lilly and my younger sisters name is Primrose," she tells him. "We're a family of flowers." But yet she still doesn't tell him her own name.

"And what is your name?" Peeta asks. "Let me guess. Rose?"

She shakes her head from side to side, her cheeks blushing over. "Katniss. Traditional spelling."

"Like the water plant?" Peeta asks, remembering his father mentioning it once when they went to the lake on the other side of town.

"Yes. My father used to tell me, 'as long as you can find yourself you'll never go hungry'." Peeta wonders if there was a reason Katniss would ever go hungry. She was skinny but not the point where Peeta would think anything of it. Her pants fit a little loose, her shirt too but then again, that could just be the way she likes her clothes.

The bell rings then, chairs shuffling along the freshly waxed floor, the urge to escape the classroom nearly too much to bear. But Peeta doesn't feel it. In fact, he's reluctant to leave, not wanting Katniss to disappear into a sea of faces.

But Cato and Thresh wait for him by the door, yelling something at him about a vending machine. He doesn't listen. They can go on without him. And eventually, after it's become clear he is in no hurry, they do.

Katniss falls into step with him as they walk out of the door, talking to him about her classes. They have no more together but Peeta would have to take his luck with just one. "Where did you move from?" He asks. He's traveling in the opposite direction of his own class that he shares with Finnick but he doesn't care. He'll take the detention.

"Iowa," she groans. "My mother got a job at the hospital here so..."

So her mother was a doctor. She had yet to mention her father other than the one comment about the katniss plant and Peeta had a feeling he wasn't around. But it was no place to question. He had just met the girl and she seemed pretty weary about human contact. He didn't want to scare her away.

"That's nice," Peeta comments. "If she ever wants breakfast really early in the morning, tell her to come by the bakery. I usually work in the mornings if I don't have football practice." That was if his mother was not there. If she was, he would get a beating for doing something so stupid.

"You don't have to do that, Peeta," Katniss whispers, looking a little uneasy about the predicament. "She usually works nights anyway."

She goes into her Literature Class, waving to him over her shoulder before the door shuts. The bell rings and Peeta has to sprint to class, sweating through his shirt by the time he rushes through the door.

Finnick saved him a seat in the back of the class thankfully.

...

He falls in to the swing of things quickly. High-school isn't nearly as bad as every one made it sound; at least it wasn't for him.

His brothers show him the ropes, who to avoid and who to get friendly with. He charms his way out of detention the fourth day of school, managing to get Cato and Thresh out of trouble as well. A senior, Alta, gives him her number one day at lunch, winking as she tells him to call her which is seen as a big achievement by all of his friends.

He gives it too Thresh.

...

The best part of high school thus far is easily Katniss Everdeen.

After the first day of school, he took the trip home with his brothers and immediately fired up his laptop, searching every social networking sight he could think of. She wasn't on any of them. He tried google next, only finding an article on her middle schools homepage about her achievements in environmental science. There is nothing else on her and he curses the internet, for once, not doing him any justice. "Damn you Steve Jobs," he whispered shutting down the Mac, joining his family for dinner.

He didn't know much about her even after sitting next to her every day for a week; she wasn't the most outgoing person. She laughed at his jokes and commented every once in awhile on the way he curled his "p"'s. But other than that she kept to herself, only speaking to him if spoken to and even then not ever saying much.

Peeta didn't mind. He just liked the thought of her. He was the only person she smiled at and that was good enough for him.

...

On a day with particularly bad weather, his mother drags him into the bakery in the early hours of the morning.

He makes the bread while she takes the orders.

She never asks Rye or Wheaton to help her in the bakery, not even on days when Peeta is so sick it may not even be safe for him to touch food. But she doesn't really ask Peeta either. Just drags him from the covers and into the car.

When he finally makes it school, he's already been up for almost eight hours. By the time lunch rolls around, he chooses to spend his hour sleeping in the backseat of his brothers pick up truck versus in the cafeteria with his friends.

He wakes only by the sound of a laugh and then the soft feeling of nails scratching against his back to wake him. This couldn't possibly be his brothers who didn't even have this lunch. Probably just Finnick looking to make a joke out of everything. He swats his hands away impatiently. "I'm not in the mood right now."

"I just thought you'd want to know lunch is over," Katniss says, jumping into the bed of the truck where Peeta lies. There isn't much room and their bodies have to mold around each other. Peeta feels the pull in his groin he so commonly feels around her, trying his best to shift away from her slender body, not wanting to make her uncomfortable. She had just started speaking with him outside of English. The last thing he wanted to do was compromise that.

"Sorry," he mumbles, wiping away the sleep from his eyes and hoping he doesn't look too horrid. She looks beautiful. Her hair down today, the tips skimming the bottom of her hips, sleek and straight with curls here and there. Her face remains makeup less, her eyes almost blue in the sunlight that was just peeking over the clouds. "I thought you were Finnick."

"Is Finnick your model friend?" She asks, her eyes going over her shoulder to where, in fact, Finnick and the rest of his friends were standing, all looking confused and envious. Peeta nods, raising a hand to wave in their general direction. Upon being spotted they all look away, busying themselves in random things. "He's very handsome."

Jealousy flows through him, making him clench his fist. Finnick was sometimes the best thing that ever happened to him and sometimes the worst. "I guess," Peeta whispers.

"Not my type though," she retorts, grabbing the apple from her leather sack which was nearing the end of it's life from what Peeta could tell. The thing was old, raggedy, smelled of something you may find buried deep in his grandmothers closet. He wondered why such a pretty girl would carry around such a thing. Maybe that's how they do it in Iowa.

"What's your type?" Peeta asks, his voice sounding nonchalant but the redness in his ears giving him away. It was a good thing Finnick was more than a hundred feet away or he would surely have a field day.

"I don't know. But not him," she says, biting into the apple finally, juice falling down her chin and onto the black shirt she wears. How badly he wants to lick the sweet juice off of her chin and so much more...

"We should really get going," she tells him, throwing the bag around her shoulder, hoisting him up into a sitting position. She doesn't move past the trucks tire until he too has gotten his bearings.

They walk to class together, no conversation between them but nevertheless, together. Cato and Thresh join, making it a crowd. Peeta has never enjoyed crowds and by the way Katniss cowards to his side, she doesn't either. They talk enthusiastically on Peetas position on the football team, then go on to say how easy it will be to gain a starting position once his brothers go off to college next fall. "You're a Mellark," Cato says, clapping Peetas shoulders with excitement. "You already have the world in your hands and this is just the beginning."

Peeta just nods, not even listening to the words. Just watching the silent blush growing deeper on Katnisses face.

...

Finnick heckles him all throughout math about her. Wanting to know in vivid detail about every interaction they've ever had, anything she's ever said, if they've ever had sex. Peeta nearly punches Finnick in the face when the last question comes, not even bothering to join in on the annoying hoots and howls Finnick gives.

"She's hot, Peeta," he says. "You better get her before someone else does. Cause you know how quick fresh meat goes."

He has a problem with Katniss being referred to in such a barbaric way but he says nothing. Because Finnick is right. All the girls in his grade and beyond had grown up in this town. It was the same faces, same people, and Katniss was something new, something exciting that Panem hadn't seen in a long time. He heard the boys in the locker room talk about her like she was a prize to gain; not the beautiful, smart, generous person she was. Gale Hawthorne bet fifty dollars he would sleep with her by the end of his senior year. He'd almost punched him too.

But when Peeta did see Katniss, she was always alone or with Madge Undersee, the mayors daughter. She was pretty quite too but much nicer than most of the student body. He was glad Katniss had found a friend in her, at least.

He was also glad she found a friend in him.

...

She gives him her number the third week of school, right before classes let out for the Thanksgiving holidays. She says she needs a pie, not a big one but just enough to feed four people and Peeta promises to bake her one.

"That's too much trouble," she counters. She was always shaking off his kind gestures, always making them seem unimportant.

She had flat out refused the lunch he'd made for her the Friday before, saying she couldn't possibly take the turkey sandwich as if it was anything more than a turkey sandwich. He had plenty at home, it was no problem, he had tried to assure her. But this only unsettled her more. She ran away shortly after, linking onto Madge Undersees arm. She didn't speak to him in English that day either. He'd pondered all throughout the weekend where he went wrong. His brothers had promised him it was a great idea, told him he'd surely get his 'dick wet' for that. But that wasn't his plan; at least not yet. He just wanted to be nice but maybe his gesture had done the opposite.

But when he arrived to fifth hour after lunch that Monday, an apology already on the tip of his tongue, Katniss silenced him with her own apology. All was forgiven for then at least.

When she'd agreed to let him bake her family a pie for thanksgiving, he was surprised to say the least. He had expected more of a fight. Even if she had given him one, he might just do something crazy like stalk her down and leave it on her doorstep. Regardless, when she's scribbles her seven digit number on the top of his hand, his heart stops. He forgets for a moment to breathe. "Call me if there's a problem. I'll be by Thursday morning to pick it up, if that's okay?"

Of course it's okay. Three in the morning would be okay for her. "Yeah, Katniss, sure."

"Have a good break," she says, her arms wrapping around his body. It takes him a moment to respond, a moment to gather his head enough to tell his body to move, to recuperate. But when he does he knows he's home.

Thresh and Cato stand behind him, their eyes wide with shock. Thresh mouths something, probably something crude and completely unoriginal but Peeta doesn't catch it, to enveloped in the smell of pine that followed Katniss everywhere she went. He loved the smell and would love it forever.

When she turns to leave, he fights the urge to run after her. Only breaking out of his trance when Cato claps his back, enveloping him in a hug of his own. It doesn't have the same effects Katnisses had and Peeta wishes the moment to be over soon. "You dog!" He yells, drawing more attention than Peeta would care for.

"How come you didn't tell us you were hitting that?" Thresh asks.

"Because I'm not. We're friends," he tells them, unable to stop his blush.

"But you wish you were, no?"

Boy did he ever.

...

He's at the bakery by four am on Thanksgiving, wanting to make Katnisses pie fresh while all the others that had been ordered were made last night. He makes her three, more than she asked for but he couldn't help himself. He places the apple, pecan, and pumpkin in a white tin, writing 'Everdeen' in big blocky letters. He hesitates a moment before adding the word 'prepaid' on the ticket. His mother was at home preparing dinner, she wouldn't be in the bakery all day. She would never know.

He tried to busy himself as much as he could but once the clock struck eight, he found there was nothing else in the bakery he could do. He'd waxed the floors, fixed the lightbulb, dealt with the few customers that had arrived early, and made a few breads for dinner. He'd dusted the blinds, wiped down the tables (twice), and cleaned the glass windows inside and out. There was nothing left to do in the small bakery but wait. Wait for her.

His brothers come in around nine to help with what the Mellarks like to call 'The Rush'. All the first time holidays cooks usually arrive somewhere between nine and ten, distressed when the chilling pies they had left out the night before did not come out the way they'd hoped, needed a quick solution that is more appetizing than the store bought pumpkin pie that tastes like molasses. So his brothers deal with that and Peeta sulks in the back, watching from the window for Katniss to come along.

He finally spots her when she's a good half mile down the road, tugging a sullen blonde girl along with her. "Rye, Wheaton! Go to the back!" Peeta hisses, wiping the flour from his face and hoping he doesn't look to worn.

"Why?" Wheaton mumbles, crumbs from the half eaten muffin he has falling atop the countertop Peeta has just washed-_twice. _Peeta just rolls his eyes, ushering his brothers to their feet and into the back room he just emerged from. The door locks just when the front door opens.

"I was beginning to wonder if you'd changed your mind," Peeta mumbles, smiling once to Katniss and then to Prim who is looking less than thrilled. "You must be Prim. I'm Peeta."

With a quick shove from Katniss, Prim places her hand in his grip. "Hello Peeta," she says. "I've heard so much about you."

The light in Peetas eyes in undeniable as he smiles down at the young girl, a million questions rolling through his mind. She had heard about him? What _had_ she heard about him?

As the three of them talk, Peeta begins to notice how drastically different the two sisters are.

Prim looks nothing like Katniss. With her blonde hair and blue eyes, she looked more closely related to Peeta and his brothers than to Katniss. She was talkative, obviously in a bad mood for some reason, but more personable than Katniss was. Prim had taken five minutes just to thank him from saving her from Katnisses attempt at cooking.

"Well I'm glad I could help!" Peeta cheers, placing the bag atop the counter, not bothering to take the money Katniss has in her hand. "It's on the house. Happy Thanksgiving." Katniss is hesitant like he knew she would be but Prim accepts the pies with urgency as if at any moment they'll be taken from her. Peeta tries not to let his stare linger to long.

"You really don't have to do that, Peeta," Katniss says, once again trying her best to hand him the forty dollars in her hand. If his mother was here, there is no way the forty dollars would cover the charge of all three pies but he says nothing. "Twenty?" She compromises, handing him the bill. He accepts it.

"Have a nice holiday, Katniss," he calls after her retreating figure. "You too, Prim!" Prim waves goodbye, the white dress she wears flapping the wind.

"Peeta, you've surely done it now!" Rye yells before busting through the doorway, his eyes wide with surprise, Wheaton close behind. "We didn't know you were hitting _that_!" But he wasn't hitting anything and why he was constantly having to remind everyone of that, he didn't understand.

"She's just a friend," Peeta says. He could call her a friend, right? She had called him her friend once, not to long ago when he asked her how things were going here. Yes, Katniss Everdeen was just his friend and for now, that was more than enough.

"Just a friend?" Wheaton calls, his eyes wide with questioning. He shakes his head from side to side, whispering something into his twin brothers ear that wasn't meant for Peeta to hear. They often communicate like this. It no longer bothered Peeta. "Moms going to have a field day when she hears that you gave a friend three pies for twenty dollars!"

Peeta face burns. His brothers won't sell him out, he's sure of it. They had a silent agreement to have each others backs, at least when mother was getting angry. "You wouldn't."

The boys look at each other, their eyes locking for a few strong moments and Peeta knows he's in for something. That is what all the whispering was about. "Three weeks. Laundry. We won't say a thing."

Peeta agrees without complaint. He could care less.

...

He doesn't hear from Katniss for the rest of break. He does exactly the opposite of what his brothers tell him, texting her the day after Thanksgiving asking her if she enjoyed the pies.

Much to his embarrassment, she did not reply.

...

The first day back at school is the worst.

Peeta is used as a punching bag for the better part of an hour during football, coming out of the locker room with a bruised ego and about five broken ribs, he's sure of it. His brothers told him to suck it up and stop whining.

He's behind in all his classes, forgetting in two that he even had work to do over the holiday. The teachers scold him and threaten to call Coach Abernathy but it's an empty threat and even if they did, he doubts the head football coach would do anything but give him a quick scolding and send him on his way.

At lunch all his friends talk excitedly about the game-the first game-that's fast approaching. Only Finnick and Peeta will be playing on Friday night, all the rest of the boys are on the freshman teams. But his friends will be in the stands and they promise to cheer him on but he won't get an ounce of playing time being Rye has been the starting quarterback for the past three years. The only way he's going in is if Ryes arm becomes detached. Maybe not even then.

"So party at Peetas house after the game?" Marvel cheers, volunteering Peeta for a party he didn't even want to have. He doesn't protest though.

His parents will be out of town, going to some wedding in the city for a few nights. He's sure his brothers have already conjured up something that will involve lots and lots of alcohol. They were notorious for such parties, half the town showing up by the end of the night. The cops didn't even bother coming anymore.

I suppose since Peeta was on the football team now and he was in high-school, this meant for once he could go downstairs while the party was _actually_ happening, invite a few of his friends over. Rye and Wheaton wouldn't care. And if they said anything about it, he would just threaten to tell mom and dad. Simple.

"Maybe you could invite Katniss," Thom offers, nudging Peetas shoulder.

"Oh, would you, Peeta? I would invite her but it is your house..." Marvel states, shrugging his shoulders in a way to be indifferent. Did Marvel know Katniss? Were they friends? If so, how and when did this happen?

"I haven't seen her today," Peeta says randomly, receiving curious stares from everyone at the lunch table. His gaze wonders around the cafeteria for her but she is no where to be found. He doesn't see Madge either so he can only assume the two are together, probably having lunch outside.

"We have class with her next period, Peet," Thresh offers. "You okay, man? You seem a little out of it."

Peeta nods.

The bell rings and they all shuffle away, Peeta running ahead of Cato and Thresh so he can get to class, speak to Katniss before anyone else can. She's already sitting in her seat, her back in it's usual braid. She smiles at him as he sits down.

"Hey Peeta," she says.

"Hey Katniss." _Do it, Peeta. Ask her about the party._ "So my brothers are kind of having this party after the football game on Friday and I was just wondering if you would quite possibly-"

"Oh, Rye actually already invited me earlier this morning," she says. "That is his name, right? Rye?"

"Yeah. Are you friends with Rye?" He asks, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion. Rye would be the one to try to publicly humiliate Peeta if he had the chance. He makes a mental note to shrink all of Ryes clothes when he gets home.

"No. He actually came up to me when I passed the bakery this morning when I was dropping Prim off at school. I didn't recognize him at first but he told me he was your older brother and knew you were already planning to invite me so he would just go ahead and do it," she explains. He notes the way she uses her hands to talk.

Wait. Had Rye done him a favor?

"Oh," Peeta mumbles once he realizes he's been quiet for some time.

Now Katniss looks confused. "Do you not want me there or..."

"No. No!" Peeta rambles. "I do want you there I just would never expect my brother to do something nice for me."

"Isn't that what brothers are for?" Yes, but not Peetas brothers.

"Yeah, I guess," Peeta mumbles, moving his body around to face the front of the classroom where Miss Scranton has begun her lecture about god-knows-what. Peeta and Katniss have already tuned out the first ten minutes of class. They were both playing catch up now.

But every few minutes, Peeta couldn't help but peer at the girl beside him. The way her eyes would squint because she could not see the board, or the way she chewed on her bottom lip ever so often. He was entranced by the way her tongue would dart out to moisten her lips, her fingers making a tight fist around the pencil she wrote with. He was instantly hard.

He put his head down on his desk in defeat, thinking of nothing but Miss Scranton and dead puppies for the remainder of class.

...

Friday comes much quicker than Peeta had expected it too.

Before he knows it, the roar of the crowd rages on as the leather skinner football is kicked high into the air, the jerseys from the other team looking awfully similar to the ones Panem High wore, making the game hard to follow, at least from the sidelines.

Like expected, Peeta and Finnick sat on the bench, talking carelessly side by side as our men made tackles and their team made touchdowns. Peeta winced a few times as Rye hit the turf, his mind racing. No one was defending him. The other team was cutting through the offensive line with ease. They were fast and quick and Rye had almost no time to throw the ball. The one time he did, it was intercepted. The other team scored a touchdown.

At half time, all the boys are hauled into the locker room, given a stern talking to by the coaches who look just as exasperated as the players do. Rye removes his helmet, blood running in thick streams up and down the side of his face, making him look less than appealing. He winces as the trainers attend to him and Peeta worries that his brother may have to sit out the rest of the game. That would mean he would have to go in, get pummeled by 300 pound linemen who would, more than likely, break all the bones in his body. For the moment, he doesn't mind riding the bench. He almost prefers it.

They end up losing by ten, letting the other team score late in the fourth, handing the victory over to the Cedar Ridge Tigers. A few boys kick things around, the others try their hardest to encourage the rest of them. Either way sprits are pretty low as everyone showers. Peeta doesn't need one. He hadn't broken a sweat.

He waits outside of the locker room for Rye and Wheaton.

He's been waiting for almost twenty minutes and thinks about beginning to just walk home when Katniss appears out of the shadows. Her face isn't painted and she hasn't dyed strips of her hair red in celebration of the game like most of the student body had. She wears her typical black t-shirt and jean combination, her hair in a simple braid, standing out more to him than any of the adoring fans in the stands.

"Hey. Good game, Peeta," she says, coming to sit beside him. He fights the urge to tangle his fingers into hers. He takes a quick sniff of his armpit, now wishing he had opted to take that shower.

"I didn't know if you were coming for sure; I would've looked," he lies. He had asked Madge Undersee at least thirteen times if Katniss was coming. She had promised him she was but Peeta wasn't sure if that was to get him off her back or she actually knew. Peeta had spent the better half of the third quarter, his eyes scanning the stands for her. When he hadn't been able to find her, he was positive Madge had lied to him.

"Yes, well, I'm trying to be more of a teenager. Do things teenagers do and what not," she tells him, toying with the tip of her braid.

"How's that working out for ya?"

"Better than I thought but if I'm being honest with you, I really don't like football at all," she admits.

He has too laugh because after sitting on the sidelines for two full hours, he has to admit he doesn't like it all that much either. "Yeah. It can be a bit slow some times."

"You're brother is very good but I've heard you're better," she says, her eyes meeting his.

"Who told you that?" Peeta asks.

"Oh, I would never reveal my sources Mr. Mellark," she says, doing the worst impression of a british accent that Peeta has ever heard. He laughs, shaking his head along with her when his brothers finally make their way from the locker room, Rye with a bandage over his eyes and Wheaton with four bruised fingers.

"Hey Katniss," Rye greets, giving her a small smile. Peeta flinches, not liking the tone in his brothers voice when he speaks to Katniss. He never thought he would need to stake claim on a girl, at least not with his brothers. But it seemed it was slowly getting to that point. He made a mental note to tell Rye to fuck off tomorrow and to keep a close eye on Katniss all night. "Are you coming to the party?"

Katniss nods, getting to her feet and dusting the back of her jeans. Peeta watches the way her hands fly to her waist, her waist which she can so easily encircle. He gulps, looking up and meeting Wheatons eyes. He says nothing, just makes a quick kissy face that no one will see; at least he hopes not.

"Do you need a ride?" Peeta offers, knowing the car will probably already be filled with all of their teammates but Katniss can squeeze. Or sit on his lap...

"No thanks. I'm going with Madge. She's waiting for me by the front actually. I was only supposed to come say hello," she says, smiling at Peeta before bidding farewell to all the Mellark boys and promising to see them tonight.

As soon as she's out of ear shot, Peetas brothers begin to talk in vivid detail about the 'things they would do to that body'. Peeta grabs ahold of Ryes shirt with one hand, hitting Wheaton in the balls with the other. "Don't talk about her that way," he threatens. He's not taken seriously and both boys just laugh, rustling Peetas hair as they make their way to the car which is, in fact, packed.

Finnick, Peeta, and a couple of their team mates, Phil and Roger, sit in the bed of Ryes pick up truck as they take the short six minute drive back to the Mellark home. Finnick talks about Annie Cresta, a girl they've all known since kindergarden, the entire ride. "She's gotten extremely hot over the summer. Don't tell me none of you have noticed?" None of the boys had.

Annie was a nice girl and Peeta had always thought she was pretty. She had been in almost of all his classes up until this year, only making an appearance in one or two of them. He had to admit, her acne had cleared up quite a bit but even without it, she still had the same bright green eyes and dusty red hair she always had. Finnick just never took notice to her.

"She'll be here tonight, right man?" Finnick asks, shoving his thumbs into Peetas side. This was okay to do when Peeta still had a thin layer of body fat but now that most of it was compact muscle, it hurt. Peeta shoves him away.

"Yeah, man. I invited her. I think she's coming with Delly Cartwright," he tells him, noting that he did, in fact, invite her. "Don't try anything tonight, Finn. You know how she is." All of Panem knew how she was. A little strange at times, often off or confused or just absent from the present.

Finnick just groans, making an obscure thrusting motion that gets all the boys in the truck bed to laugh. "I'll tell you what; she won't be like that anymore after she gets a piece of this!" Peeta rolls his eyes at his best friend, wondering how in the world he was going to make it in life outside of this town with the things he says and the way he acts.

The party in in full swing an hour later, music blaring loudly over the large lawn that Peeta had mowed just this morning in preparation. Peeta has already seen two couples sneak upstairs, probably claiming stake on his bed room being it is the first door you see. Either that or the bathroom.

Peeta chokes down the beer Finnick had given him earlier in the night, telling him to act like a man. He didn't care for the taste. Never had but the more of it he drank, the less it actually mattered to him. He was buzzed but tried his best to stand up straight, keep his voice together if someone spoke to him. The last thing he needed all his team mates to peg him as was a light weight.

"Peeta, I've been looking every where for you," Marvel slurs, coming to his side on the stairs at once, throwing an arm over his shoulders. His ashy brown hair is plastered to his forehead, his eyes glassy and inattentive. "This is the best party ever. How long have you been here?"

Peeta laughs, bringing the cup to his mouth once more and sipping on the contents. When the cup is empty, he decides against getting another. "Well, it is my house so for a few hours I guess," he says, ushering Marvel outside where the rest of his friends are standing, all reliving in vivd detail every second of the game.

Peeta doesn't want to hear any more about it, knowing his father will also want a play by play when he comes home tomorrow, but doesn't move from their circle, not wanting to get lost in an array of people. He's not in the mood to really talk to anyone right now if their name isn't Katniss Everdeen.

His eyes scan for her, moving over every surface of the lawn but he can't spot her. He sees Rye, talking to some blonde who Peeta has seen around the house once or twice. At least Katniss isn't with him, Peeta thinks bitterly. He hopes he'll be able to find her whenever she does get here. It has to be nearing ten now but people keep piling in, people that he has never seen and he wonders if word got out to the town over. Probably. It always did.

"Have any of you seen Katniss?" He asks, interrupting Catos reenactment of the final play of the game.

"Yeah. Got here a little while ago with Madge Undersee who is looking _good_," Thom says, slapping palms with Thresh.

"Where are they now? Have you seen them recently?" His voice sound desperate and even he hears it.

"Last I saw her she was chatting it up by the pool with Gale Hawthorne," Cato says, nodding towards the crowded pool area. Peeta makes a mental note to tell Rye and Wheaton they should start covering it up. Sooner or later someone is going to be drunk and fall in and that they'll have no choice but to tell their parents.

Peeta wastes no more time talking to his friends, stepping around Marvel who is now fast asleep on the grass. He moves fast.

Sure enough, he spots Katniss, a red cup in her hand, Gale Hawthorne at her side, speaking softly in to her ear. She laughs, laughs the way she laughs at all of Peetas bad jokes, and swats away at Gales hands which are making a grab at her waist. It's all playful though. She's enjoying this.

Peeta manages to escape Glimmers drunken claws, weaving swiftly in and out of the sea of people, trying to get to Katniss as soon as possible. She can't be alone with Gale for too long. Surely he'll lose her then. Not that he _had _her but...

"Katniss," Peeta says breathlessly, grabbing ahold of her hand and hoisting her to her feet, away from Gale Hawthorne who looks less than thrilled with Peeta.

"Oh Peeta! I was looking all over the place for you," she says, moving to wrap her arms around Peetas neck. He's once again lost in the smell of her and the way her arms feel around him. But the hug means nothing. She is just being friendly and she pulls away all too soon, leaving him looking expectant. "Gale was just keeping me company."

Peeta looks to the junior boy who has a smug smile on his face, sipping ever so often from the red plastic cup in his grip. He raises his eyebrows, not once but twice. Peeta knew things that Katniss didn't. He knew about the $100 Gale would be getting if tonight went the way he was planning in his head. But Peeta was here now and that wouldn't happen.

"How long have you been here?" He questions, trying his best to get a peek at the contents of her own cup. "I've been trying to keep an eye out for you."

"Not too long ago. Maybe an hour or so ago. I lost Madge when we walked in though. I should really find her," Katniss says, her eyes roaming over the ever growing party. It would be nearly impossible to find one person in the crowd that was forming.

"I'll look with you," Peeta offers anyway, grabbing a hold of her elbow. "Bye Gale!" He calls over his shoulder, ignoring his pleads to stay. For the moment, Katniss seems to forget too, wrapping her hand around Peetas bicep as he pushes them through the masses.

"You have a beautiful home," Katniss says after awhile. Peeta just nods. He was always hearing that. "Peeta, we can find Madge later. I'm sure she'll call if she needs me."

She pulls the two of them to a stop, sitting on the benches neatly placed by his front door. It wasn't the safest place to sit with the constant array of people moving in and out but it didn't matter. The two of them were completely wrapped up in the fascination of one another.

Once you got Katniss talking, it was hard to get her to stop. But Peeta didn't mind. He gladly listened while she spoke about life back in Iowa, and the way she used to hunt in the woods, and Prim. She was endless about Prim, never coming up short when speaking about her beauty and kindness and bravery and Peeta wishes he and his brothers had formed the relationship they had.

He loved to hear her talk and that's all he did that night.

...

His brothers wake up with a massive hangover as do all his friends. He's alone in the cleaning process and almost takes Katniss up on her offer to help clean up in the morning but he doesn't want to wake her.

His parents will be home in less than an hour and it looks like a tornado has run through, a few of his mothers vases even broken over the course of the night. He will, inevitably, take the fall for it. Tell her some bullshit story about playing baseball in the house and their being a few accidents. His mother will scream, his father will ground him, and his brothers will sneak him out. It was an endless cycle.

He's just finished disposing of all the red cups on the back lawn when Finnick gets his bearings together, offering to help. Every thing moves faster with two people. They don't speak, Finnick still feeling like a train had hit him and Peeta doesn't either, not really having anything to talk about.

"You have a good time last night?" Finnick mumbles, the ray bans on his face slightly easing his mood.

"I did," Peeta says. "What about you?"

"Peeta, man. I had two beers and I feel like a train has run over me and speared my body in half," he explains, getting to his knees and relinquishing in the feeling of the cool grass under him. "Remind me to never drink again."

"It was your first time. You'll get a tolerance to it," Peeta explains, running the trash bag full of party remains the half mile to his neighbors trash can just in case his parents decided to check. "My brothers could each probably drown a hole keg separately and not feel a thing." It's true. He'd seen then do it.

"Is that why Rye is puking his guts out in the upstairs bathroom?" Finnick counters.

Peeta shrugs.

Serves them right.

...

A week before winter break, Katniss asks Peeta if he would like to come over after school to work on an assignment for their english final.

"If you don't want too that's fine but I feel so bad always taking up room in your house," she says.

Peeta agrees and that day after school, he tells his brothers to leave without him and goes home with her. It's a short walk, a mile or two at the most. They pick up Prim from school and she is more than delighted to have Peeta over. She asks him all types of questions on their journey home about working at the bakery.

"Do you get to eat all the cupcakes you want?" That question excites her the most but Peetas answer is less than satisfactory.

"No. My mother will yell if we take anything without paying for it unless it's going in the trash," he says.

"What good is food that's going in the trash?" She asks. Katniss scolds her quietly.

"That's the point. Anything we can make money off of, we try too."

Peeta doesn't really understand his mothers viewpoint on this. When Ripper, the only begger on the streets of Panem, comes to their door begging for scraps of food, he always has a hard time turning her away. His mother would have his head if he gave her anything without making her pay for it but regardless he always leaves her with at least one piece of the stale bread he probably would've eaten himself. Mrs. Mellark was not one to give out charity as if the Mellarks did not have enough on their own.

She had always told them it was for college, so that they wouldn't be tied down to this town like she was but that answer was no longer doing her justice. Rye was getting a full scholarship to Alabama in the fall; Wheaton one to Oregon. Peeta had surpassed his brothers athletically and would no doubt be getting at least a partial to whatever school he chose. All of the boys colleges were paid for and yet they couldn't give to Ripper or hungry kids from the Seam.

But he didn't question it much.

The Everdeen house is small, maybe half the size of the Mellark residence. In the front yard is a large oak tree, a makeshift swing hanging from one of the sturdier branches. There are primrose flowers planted along the sidewalk, beautiful even in their dying state as winter fast approaches.

Katniss fishes for her keys in her pocket, unlocking the door. She removes her shoes before entering so Peeta does the same, watching as she pads barefoot through her home, wandering off into what Peeta can only assume to be the kitchen. "Are you hungry?" She calls too him.

"Not really," he says. But he was. Katniss never accepted the food he kept in his home, out of courtesy he supposed. So he did the same though his stomach betrays him moments later by growling. Only the Everdeen mangily cat is there to hear it though, hissing before clawing at the expanse of Peetas leg.

"Just ignore the thing," she tells him, using one of her toes to send the poor animal flying towards an opposing wall. This upsets Prim but Katniss ignores her, motioning for Peeta to follow her into her room.

Peeta is right with his assumptions about Mr. Everdeen. There is no room for him in the home, no photos of him. Dead-beat most likely. Most were.

Her room is nothing like Peeta imagined but he decides he likes the real thing better. There are no pink curtains, or flamboyant patters. Just a bed in the corner of the room, a book shelf filled with every book imaginable, and a a small TV that sat on her dresser. It was Katniss. Simple and clean.

"You can sit on the bed if you like," she says. But she has already sprawled out on most of it. There is no way the two would be able to coexist comfortably. He takes a seat in the computer chair by her desk, spinning in it like he was a small child.

They don't get much work done. Peeta is to distracted by the way Katnisses shirt hangs lower than it should and she is to busy catching up on another reading assignment for history.

In fact they don't do any work. Just laugh and talk and, eventually, eat.

He could get used to this.

...

Katniss is slowly becoming a regular at the Mellark residence, even more so than Finnick who is giving her tough competition.

His father thinks she's a nice girl. His mother thinks she's dirty.

...

"What are you getting Katniss for Christmas?" Wheaton asks during a forced family shopping trip after church one Sunday. All the Mellark boys are still dressed in their sweater vests and polos, looking completely out of place in the department store their mother dragged them too.

"What do you mean?" Peeta asks, not having given it any real thought. He didn't get any of his friends Christmas presents mostly because his mother didn't want to waste the money and he had none of his own.

"C'mon, Peeta. Get with it. What are you getting your girlfriend?" He asks again.

"She's not my girlfriend," Peeta whispers though he wishes she was. The more time they spent together the more he hated being apart from her. He had thought he'd fallen for her the first day but he kept falling for her everyday. He had told Finnick this and Finnick had slapped him across the face, telling him he was in too deep. He was.

"Sure," Rye says mockingly, picking up a baseball from the shelf, turning it in his hand. "Peeta, you'll never get her in bed if you don't start spending a little cash on her."

"I'm only fourteen. What business do I have being in bed?" Peeta hisses, trying to avoid having his brothers see the shade of red his body is turning. He had thought about it but, like he said, he was fourteen. It had only been a couple of months since he even started experimenting with himself. There was no way he was ready for anything with anyone else.

"Peeta, when I was sixteen I had my first threesome," Wheaton says. Peeta is sure it's a lie. "When I was your age I was bagging chicks left and right."

"And luckily for you, you have the Mellark charm," Rye says, winking to a sales associate who has been eyeing the boys for quite some time. "You're not quite as attractive as your big bros over here but that isn't your fault. You can still make it work."

Peeta wishes the earth would swallow him whole now.

Wheaton picks up a bra, one with lace and leopard print that Peeta thinks is tacky. "Buy Katniss this. Have her model it for you," he jokes, placing it over his own chest and earning a few laughs from Rye. Peeta doesn't find it funny in the least bit.

"Katniss would never wear anything like that," he mumbles.

"And how would you know? Have you seen her bras?" Rye teases.

He's seen bits and pieces of them when they protrude from her shirt but, no, he had never seen them directly. His silence is answer enough and his older brothers sit him on a bench, kneeling down to his eye level. For a minute he thinks their going to give him advice that may actually help him gain Katnisses attention.

But he's wrong.

"The silent ones are the freakiest ones in bed, Peet," Rye says in all seriousness, looking to Wheaton for support.

Wheaton nods. "It's true. I bet little miss Everdeen is into crotchless panties and all that shit."

Peeta makes a split second decision and punches Wheaton in the windpipe, Rye next. He gets a good shot and they both fall to their knees, gasping for air for a moments time.

Peeta takes the moment to walk away and adjust his erection.

...

He only sends her a quick text on Christmas, not wanting to spoil her time with her family by distracting her. But he had been distracted all day by thoughts of her. In fact, he's missed the entire conversation over dinner, not responding to any of his grandfathers questions at the table. His mother was quite angry with him and even his father was annoyed by his absence.

"He's just distracted by his girlfriend," Rye mumbles, shoveling the last of the potatoes into his mouth, looking up at me with a sorry expression.

"Girlfriend? What girlfriend, Peeta?" His mother asks, dropping her fork onto her plate dramatically.

"I don't have a girlfriend," Peeta says, not caring that he just flicked his brother off in front of his aging grandparents. Rye shoots it right back which gets them both excused from the table immediately. Wheaton goes ahead and leaves as well.

He says nothing to his brothers as he stalks up the stairs, not turning around when they call up to him. He slams the door, loud enough so only they would be able to hear because if nothing else, slammed doors peeved his mother to the breaking point and he didn't want to hear from her for the rest of the night either.

What a great Christmas, he thinks to himself.

But when he pulls his phone out of his pocket, Katniss has replied.

_You too, Peeta! Merry Christmas. Thanks for being the best friend.- K_

_..._

On New Years Eve, Peeta is invited to a "soiree", as Finnick had put it, at Marvels house. He had no problems convincing his parents to let him go being they had their own formal event to attend.

Peeta wondered if Katniss would be there. She and Marvel were friends he had discovered. They sat next together in the mandatory art class at Panem and had become friends just after she and Peeta had. He had no doubt she was invited but didn't know what she would do with Prim. Bringing her along wasn't an option.

When he arrives there isn't much to do, just sit around and sip on what little alcohol Marvel was able to smuggle from his parents.

All of his friends are drunk by the time midnight rolls around. Peeta is fine.

Katniss never shows up, much to his disappointment so he sulks on the couch next to Annie, the only other person in the house that can still form a coherent thought.

"What's wrong with you?" She asks, her eyes never leaving Finnick as he saunters around the room with Glimmer who looks overdressed in the silver dress she wore.

"I don't know. Just not really into all this party stuff, I guess," Peeta answers. Really, he isn't in to this party stuff without Katniss. If she was here, he would be having a great time.

"Me either," Annie whispers.

So they sit side by side for the rest of the night, not saying anything, each sulking in their own self-pity.

...

"I'm thinking about cutting my hair off," Katniss tells him, grabbing a chunk of her long chestnut locks. She holds it up to the light, bits of red and gold flickering off like a spark.

"Why?" Peeta asks, finishing off the sandwich he had bought for lunch. They eat lunch together almost every day, always away from his friends because their obnoxious and loud and he doesn't like the way they all look at her like she's prey. He likes Katniss all to himself not matter how selfish that may be.

"I'm getting tired of it," she replies.

He isn't. "It's beautiful," he says, reaching out his own hand to grab the end of her braid, using the pads of his fingers to run against her ends. She says nothing but the rosy tint to her cheeks is undeniable. He pulls back immediately.

...

Clove kisses him behind the stairs one day on their way to class early one morning. He is chatting with her about football when suddenly his back is against the wall and her mouth is on his, her tongue quickly making it inside his mouth even against his protests.

He puts his hands on her hips to still her but it only seems to rile her up more.

It isn't his first kiss or even his second but it isn't pleasant like the others were. It isn't slow and calm and steady. It's needy and quick and sloppy.

And he doesn't like Clove. He has always thought she was pretty but other than that she had no other qualities to her. She was shallow and vain much like her best friend Glimmer was and thought way to highly of herself. He'd never understood the boys infatuation with her and even now, as she practically mounts him in the staircase, he still doesn't understand. His body isn't reacting either. Not the way it would if this were Katniss.

With that thought Peeta pushes her away from him, not hard enough to hurt her but hard enough to put some space between the two of them. When he pulls apart her lips and red and swollen, her eyes lustful and dark. He can't imagine he looks the same way. He is just confused and uncomfortable.

"What's a matter Peeta? No one will see," she says, taking another step towards him, her lips puckered and she's ready to make the attack. But he now expects her advances and moves away swiftly, taking the stairs two at a time to get away from her. She calls for him up the stair case but it is too late. He is long gone.

...

Word spreads quick about their kiss in the stairwell. Apparently, Clove told Glimmer who told every other person in Panem. She left out the part about Peetas escape and how he, actually, didn't enjoy it in the least bit.

When he gets in the car at the end of the school day his brothers hound him, winking at him as they ask him if kissing is all they did in that stairwell. "Did Clove go ahead and drop to her knees? C'mon Peeta, we won't tell," Wheaton teases.

Peeta contemplates jumping out of the car at the next stop sign or maybe even while it's moving but he refrains from that, putting his hands over his hear because his brothers are starting to make awful moaning noises.

"I don't even like her," Peeta hisses, grabbing his backpack from the truck bed and hauling ass upstairs. He ignores his fathers calls and his mothers screams, slamming the door with as much force as he can because he doesn't even care in this moment wether he gets grounded. No one comes for him, his brothers no doubt telling his father about the few days he's had. Everyone leaves him alone.

His phone rings when he's preparing from bed, Katnisses ringtone playing loudly from his backpack. He was planning on not taking calls for at least a month but for Katniss, he would answer anytime. The line almost goes dead but he gets to it just in time, answering on the second to last ring.

"Peeta, hey," she greets, her voice lacking the interest it usually holds. He knows what she's calling about. It's what everyone had been calling about but she was the only person who needed to know the real story. She was the only one he cared about hurting.

"Hey, Katniss. What's up?" Peeta asks, rushing to the other side of the room to lock his door.

"So, what did I hear about you kissing Clove the other day in the stairwell?" She asks, her tone light hearted.

"It really wasn't what you think. She pretty much attacked me and I kind of was just shocked for a moment I guess. I didn't push her away fast enough so maybe she got the impression that it was something I wanted too," Peeta says. "But it was the exact opposite actually."

Katniss laughs. "Oh please. You know you loved it. She's a pretty girl."

Clove was a pretty girl but she was no Katniss. "Yeah but there's nothing else there." He almost thinks about telling her how he feels, telling her that he's about 99% sure he is in love with her. But when he opens his mouth to say the words, nothing comes out but a quiet squeak.

"The right girl will come along, Peeta," she says.

She already had.

"So, the real reason I called was ask your opinion on something." This quirks Peetas interests. She rarely asked anything of other than the occasional ride home or to bring her a cheese bun on days she's craving them.

"Yes?" he asks.

"Gale Hawthorne asked me on a date and I said yes. Do you think that was a good idea?"

Oh no. Oh no no no no no.

...

It wasn't a good idea. It wasn't a good idea but he tells her it is because he doesn't know what else to say. He surely can't tell her what Gale says in the locker room. That will put him on Gales bad side and he really needs those blocks if the team has a chance of winning a game next year.

He watches Gale for the next few weeks, watching the way he talks to her and the way he interrupts their lunches. He watches his grey eyes watch hers and the way he tucks her braid behind her shoulder sometimes. The way Katniss laughs ever so often, her cheeks blushing like they so commonly do.

Katniss was smitten. Smitten with Gale who was only using her for one reason and Peeta knew what it was. He would tell her one day, just not today or tomorrow. He doubts Katniss would actually have sex with the guy. She told him just a few days ago the only thing they did was kiss and it was once or twice, maybe.

But even that made his blood boil.

...

He can't eat or sleep on Valentines Day, knowing Katniss is out to dinner with Gale who picked her up from her house in the fancy sports car he drives. How was Peeta supposed to compete with the man if he had a car? Peeta had almost seven more months until he got his own license but by then, it would be too late. Gale would already have Katniss in bed and $100 in his pocket.

He sits on Finnicks couch, eating a whole bag of chips over a span of thirty minutes. Finnick is impressed and is convinced they should train him to be a professional hot dog eater. Peeta cracks a smile.

"You see! I've been waiting for that," Finnick cheers, slapping his best friend on the back. "All you've been doing is sulking ever since Katniss started dating Gale."

"They aren't dating," Peeta corrects. He had a long conversation over the phone with Katniss just the other day on reasons why Gale would not ask her to be his girlfriend. Of course, Peeta knew the real answer but he kept her at bay, telling him he was just really busy with football and was probably focusing all his attention on that. It held her over for now but it did little to ease the pain in Peetas heart.

"Hooking up, whatever their doing, but man! You've got to get back out there. I know Clove is still interested," he says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. It had taken weeks for the rumor to go away and Peeta did not wish to rehash it.

"She's not my type," Peeta says, flipping through the channels on TV.

"What is your type then?"

Katniss was his type.

...

Peeta is near his wits end with hearing Gale speak in the locker room. He even moved his locker so his obnoxious voice couldn't be heard but it was no use. It seemed it followed him every where he went.

"Dude, she's easily one of the hottest girls in this school," someone says, probably one of the upperclassman Peeta doesn't associate with. "And that ass! Whew!"

"I'm still trying to teach her a thing or two before we take a trip down that lane if you feel my drift." The locker room erupts in roars of both praise and laughter and Peeta wonders how many times he would have to hit his head in order to knock himself out.

Then his name is being called by Gale and it takes all he has to compose his features by the time he turns around. The boy is in his face, his minty breath washing over Peetas. Peeta keeps his stance tall though Gale easily towers over him. He tries not to think anything of it.

"Where do you think Katniss would like to go Friday night? I have a feeling we'll be very, very busy." Is he taunting him?

"I don't know, Gale. Why don't you ask her?" Peeta spits back, turning around to shove the rest of the weeks clothes into the hamper he takes home.

"I guess the back of my car could work too though, huh?"

Peeta slams his locker door with as much force as he can muster, cursing his entire way out of the locker room.

...

He finds it hard to talk to Katniss now, to look at her without becoming angry. His face reddens whenever he sees the bruises on her necks, no doubt left there by Gales lips. Or the one time she came to class ten minutes late, her braid a wreck and her lips swollen. She looked to much like Clove in that moment and he so desperately wanted to run far far away.

"Do you want to see a movie tomorrow night?" She asks him, tucking her feet under her so she can sit as tall as him.

He shrugs. "Gale won't mind?"

She tells him he won't.

So he meets her at the movies the following night. They watch some chick flick that she picked out but he could care less about what their watching. What he does care about is the proximity of her body and the way her fingers brush his arm as they sit on the arm rest between them.

He doesn't watch the movie. He doesn't even know what the movies about but during the expanse of it, he memorizes every curve and freckle on her face and neck. He bet Gale doesn't even notice the heart shaped mole that lies right below her left ear, or the way she chews on her lips periodically. He would never notice the small things because all he cared about what was underneath the clothes. Not that Peeta didn't but he liked so much more about her than that.

At the end of the movie, Ms. Everdeen gives him a ride back home. He brings out a dozen cheese buns he had made the night before, knowing it would delight Prim and, though Katniss would never say anything, make her equally just as happy. And that was all he wanted, really.

"How was your date?" Rye yells from the date, an Xbox control in hand as he and Wheaton play the new Madden game they'd gotten for Christmas.

"It wasn't a date," Peeta remarks, going to sit on the couch opposite his brothers.

"Oh, right. She's dating Gale Hawthorne," Wheaton remarks.

"Yeah, sorry about that one bro but look on the bright side. He'll be gone by this time next year and then you have two whole years to make her fall in love with you," Rye says.

He had never said anything to his brothers about liking Katniss but somehow they knew. Maybe it was because he didn't bother correcting them when they said things like this anymore. But Peeta was an open book, always had been.

It seems everyone could read him but Katniss.

...

"We've got to put a stop to that," Marvel whispers in his ear one afternoon as they sit on the front lawn of the school. Peeta eyes had been trained on Katniss and Gale at the far end but he hadn't realized Marvels had been as well. He looks over at the boy who looks over at him. "He's not a good guy."

"No, he's not," Peeta agrees. "But what are we supposed to do? I can't tell her anything. I don't want her to get mad and I really am not trying to get on Gale Hawthorne's bad side either."

Peeta would be the starting quarterback next year now that his brother was leaving. He would be young and it was already hard enough to form relationships with the upperclassman who didn't really look at him with much respect. But he needed their respect and starting fights and stealing girlfriends wasn't the way to get it.

"He'll show his true colors eventually."

At least he hopes so.

...

"Get up, Peeta. We're going out," Finnick declares, bursting through the door to his room, Thresh and Cato flanking his sides. He'd thought he locked the door.

It was the beginning of March, the air was beginning to warm up and the boys were tired of Peetas sour mood to them. Sure, they had given him one or two weeks to be alone but his growing depression was also beginning to depress them. No one had any fun without Peeta around, even if he was just there. He was always the mediator and everyone began noticing the obvious decline in the art of making rational decisions.

"I don't want to go anywhere," Peeta said, not even bothering to move from his bed as the boys circled him, pulling clothes from his closet and throwing them in his direction. This was the fourth weekend he had spent alone, Katniss out with Gale and he didn't feel like spending time with Finnick and the guys.

"We weren't really asking you," Cato says, taking it upon himself to put socks and shoes on Peetas bare feet.

"Taking me against my will would be kidnapping and I could call the police," Peeta threatens, fighting off Finnick as he rips the shirt from his body.

"Put this on or we'll take you outside naked," he says, throwing Peeta plaid polo his way. The one he had worn the first day of school. The first day he met Katniss... "Dude! We can't take this shit anymore. C'mon. We're having a boys night. Katniss will be here when we get back."

"I really don't want to go and I don't know if I'm even allowed to go out tonight." That much is true. If he went out without permission, he'd surely get grounded but he could care less about that. He had pretty much been voluntarily grounding himself.

"We talked it over with your dad, said it was fine," Thresh tells him, unplugging his phone from the charger and shoving it in his own pockets. Peeta asks for it, not that it's rung all night, but just in case it does. He wants to be able to reach it as soon as possible if Katniss does get around to calling. She probably won't but there is still a chance.

"No. The phone is staying with us tonight."

...

Peeta actually ends up having a good time. He gets drunk enough to forget about Katniss for a few hours and crashes in the basement of Finnicks home.

When he wakes up, his head is pounding and he throws up in the bushes outside of Finnicks home. He fishes his phone from Threshs pocket, sneaking out of the backdoor without saying goodbye to his friends, just wanting too get home and shower.

He checks his phone.

Katniss called him not once, not twice, but three times.

He feels guilty when he shuts his phone off and doesn't call her back. For the first time, he doesn't want too.

...

He avoids her when Monday rolls around.

Throwing himself into his football workouts and actually making the effort to talk to his friends. It's good to talk to someone but even when he is speaking, his mind is constantly formulating thoughts about Katniss. He sees her in the cafeteria, sitting with Gale and his friends at a table not to far away from his own. He feels her eyes on him all throughout the hour but he fights the urge to look up.

When fifth hour rolled around, he contemplated not going, running to the parking lot and hiding in his brothers car. Hell, he could probably spend the 45 minutes in Coach Abernathys office. He doubts he would care. But he needs to make better grades this semester or so his mother tells him. So when the bell rings he walks slowly to the classroom, not caring that he walks in three minutes late.

Peeta sits down next to Katniss. "Why didn't you call me back?" She asks right when he sits down, not giving him a moment to gather his bearings. "Or answer my texts. Did I do something wrong? Are you angry with me?"

"No, Katniss. I was just really tired this weekend," he tells her. Tired of what, he didn't know. He just knew he was getting tired.

"You're angry with me," she says. She doesn't say anything else, turning her body towards the front of the classroom, her eyes everywhere but on Miss Scranton.

Was he angry with her? No. He wasn't angry with her, per se, but he was angry about something. More angry at himself for letting himself feel this way. Then he was angry at Gale for being an asshole. Then angry at Katniss for being naive.

"I'm not angry at you," he says but he's taken to long to say anything. She doesn't believe him now.

So when the bell rings she leaves without another word. Well shit.

...

He actually tries to call once when he gets home from school that day but she doesn't answer, her phone going straight to voicemail.

She doesn't talk to him the next day during fifth period or the next day.

The third day she doesn't even bother coming to class.

...

He's throwing a ball around with Rye in the backyard, trying his best to learn all he can from his brother before he goes away to college soon. As much as he hates to admit, he will miss his brothers when they leave. They give him a lot of shit but they also save him from a lot of trouble.

He doesn't know how he'll manage being in a home alone with just his parents. Peeta supposes he'll just start spending more time with his friends at their homes where they still have siblings and sane mothers.

"Try to move your feet, Peeta. C'mon. Get your head in the game," Rye yells, waving his hands frantically as Peeta sends the ball flying. It falls short at his feet and Peeta groans in defeat.

"His heads just not in it," Wheaton yells from the porch where he is engorging himself in what looks like last nights potato salad.

And Peetas head wasn't. It was on a whole lot of other things. All of them including on grey eyed huntress.

...

Peeta makes the decision to go to her house late one night when his parents are asleep and he should be as well. It probably isn't safe for him to leave, being there are lots of things that wonder the town this late at night but he can't stop himself.

It had been four days since he last spoke to Katniss and he felt that he could ripe his hair out at any moment. His brothers told him too mind his own. Finnick told him to suck it up. But his heart told him to fight for her.

So he makes the ten mile journey to her home on the edge of the Seam, ignoring the looks from her neighbors and the few he gets in town. He sneaks around to her window, knocking his finger on the glass hoping Prim hasn't climbed into bed with her.

Peeta watches as she slips her head at the sound, one hand running through her long locks while the other rubs her eyes. The loose tank top she wears covers little, and in the chill of the spring night her nipples stand at attention.

_Get it together Peeta. _

She sees him then, her eyes full of surprise as she rises to her feet, crossing the room to lock her door before opening the window too him, helping him maneuver his large body inside. "What the hell are you doing here, Peeta?" She whispers, pushing him onto her bed as she takes a seat in the computer chair opposite him.

What the hell was he doing here? Now his idea seemed foolish.

"I want you to know I'm not angry at you," he says.

"And that couldn't wait till morning, Peeta? You could've been killed out there! It isn't safe to walk here at night," she scolds. He realizes now walking in the Seam without any sort protection in the middle of the night was just as bad as wearing a neon sign above your head asking to get jumped. But for Katniss, he would do it.

"I'm not mad at you," he says again, running a hand over his face. He was wide awake but yet he felt he could drop at any moment.

"Well that's great Peeta but you know what, I'm mad at you!" She spits, crossing her arms across her chest, the scowl he was so used to seeing in the beginning stages of their relationship returning.

"What are you mad at me for?" Peeta asks, standing to his feet.

"Ever since Gale and I started dating you've been MIA!" She yells, keeping her voice down so that he won't be heard but making it loud enough to emphasize her point. "I don't have many girl friends here Peeta. Hell, I don't have many friends here. You're my best friend and I can't count on you anymore."

Looking in her eyes, Peeta realizes that that was all he was. Her best friend. The way she acted, the way she talked, the way she laughed... It was all because she had found a friend in him, not because she felt the same way he did. Katniss was holding onto the hope of friendship while he was fighting to hold onto the thought of love.

Peeta doesn't say anything else as she parades around her room, throwing her hands up when something truly angers her. He lets her speak, yell at him, and curse at him until his hearts content. Not hearing in of the words. Just hearing the slow cracking of his heart.

...

Gale and Katniss begin officially dating at the end of March, one or two days before Peetas birthday, he can't remember. But when Katniss shows up to his dinner, Gale is by her side, dressed nicely in a button up shirt. Katniss in a dress Peeta had never seen before. She never looked so beautiful.

All of his friends are there. His brothers are there. His parents leave them alone for most of the night. His mother only interrupting once or twice to comment on the fact Cato is dripping sauce on to her expensive linens.

Peeta doesn't taste any of the food but all of his friends reassure him it's delicious.

He gets a good amount of money out of it, a football from his brothers, a flat screen from his parents, a frame from Annie, and a card from Katniss.

He can't bring himself to read the card, not in front of every ones watchful eyes.

Cause then he just might do something stupid like cry.

...

"Guess who totally sucked my dick last night," Thresh asks the group of boys as they lounge on his couch late one night, playing a distracted game of cards. Distracted mostly because the boys cannot stop their constant chatter about an endless array of girls their seeking.

"No one because you're lying," Marvel says, cursing when Peeta once again wins his hand. "You've got to be cheating here, Peet."

"Johanna Mason," he says proudly, leaning back in his chair as all the boys stare at him in amazement. He was the first of them to do something outside of just making out with a girl and maybe some light groping if time permitted. They all believed it would be Finn but low and behold, Thresh was the first one to cross the doorway in to manhood.

They all congratulate him enviously.

...

"Mellark get your ass over here!"

Peeta exhales loudly, removing his helmet and giving his wet hair a slight shake, ridding the excess sweat that is beginning to drip into his eyes. The summer days are fast approaching and football was becoming worse and worse as the days progressed. Mostly because Peeta was now having to work directly with Gale being his brothers we're seniors and weren't required to train in offseason. Though they stayed through the class, they mostly sat through the 45 minutes just to bark orders at Peeta who was never good enough as far as they were concerned. And today they were right because Peeta has yet to throw one complete pass to his receivers.

"Warm up that arm, Mccoy!" Coach Abernathy yells to the backup quarterback who looks quiet startled even being called upon. He runs though, fumbling with his helmet and barking out orders at the line who look just as exhausted as Peeta felt. Though he knew he was about to get an earful, he was glad for the momentary break.

"What the hell do you think you're doing," Coach Abernathy mumbles below his breath, his eyes looking straight forward. He chewed on a piece of straw, his snagged tooth hanging from his mouth making him look like a savage beast. He was always hard to deal with but Peeta was finding it as even more of a challenge today.

"I'm sorry sir. It's just really hot out here," Peeta mumbles.

"Oh! Oh, you hear that Roy? It's too hot for little Mellark! That's why he's playing like shit!" He no longer tries to keep his voice low to spare Peeta of embarrassment. "Listen here, Mellark. You are making a fool out of me. Out of this program. Out of your family name. The last thing you want to do right now is mess up your chances of starting next year or all those college letters coming to my door? Yeah, they'll be long gone. You hear?"

Peeta heard. Peeta heard loud and clear.

...

Katnisses birthday is in late May.

She doesn't do anything but that morning, Peeta arrives on her doorstep with three dozen cheese buns and a bucket of fresh made almond butter because he knows how much she enjoys it. "This is really sweet Peeta," she says graciously, hugging him close to her body for longer than usual.

Things had been weird between the two lately but he was thankful for this. He was thankful for the now and he never wanted the moment to end.

But it did as soon as Gales car parks in front of her home, him with at least a dozen roses in one hand, a box of god knows what in the other. He bounds up the steps, standing at Peetas side. He doesn't acknowledge him.

"Look at what Peeta dropped by. Isn't it sweet," Katniss offers, showing him the baked goods. "He had to have spent all night making them." He had but that wasn't worth sharing.

"Thanks a lot Peeta," Gale replies, giving him a forced smile. "See you in football," he dismisses with a flick of his wrist, his hand coming down on Peetas shoulder.

"Yeah, see you in football, Gale. Bye, Katniss," he whispers, lightly jogging to his brothers car parked about a mile down the road. Rye is asleep in the drivers seat when Peeta makes his way in the car, out of breath and out of hope.

"She like it?" Rye asks, staring the cars engine. Peeta nods his head.

...

"You see, Mellark, I've got a little problem."

Peeta had been in the locker room for approximately three minutes before Gale bounds up to him, making a much bigger scene then is really needed. By this point, all of the locker room has grown silent to hear the show down that would have come at some point. Peeta had to remind himself for a moment he was just a freshman and if he threw a punch, there would be nobody on his side except for Finnick and maybe his brothers.

"And what's that, Gale?" Peeta asks, continuing to rearrange his pads in his locker in order to be able to fit more of his books.

"I'm sick and tired of you coming around Katniss all the time," he snarls.

"We're just friends," Peeta reassures. He doesn't like the eyes on him. He wishes them all gone in that moment.

"Just friends? Maybe for her but it's different for you. I can see it in the way you look at her and I really don't appreciate my girlfriend being ogled at by-"

"Don't talk about her like you really even care, Gale," Peeta snaps, slamming his locker door shut and spinning on his heel to face Gale. He's grown a little, not much but there isn't such a height deficit. "We all know what game you're trying to play with her."

A spark lights in Gales eyes. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," Peeta mumbles. "I should just tell her everything. Tell her about what a liar you are and how the only reason you're with her is because of that stupid little-"

He doesn't get to finish his sentence because Gales fist collides with the upper side of jaw before he gets the chance. Peeta has taken many hits before. In fact, he believes his mother may have a better arm. But he can taste the blood in his mouth, feel the worried looks from all around him as Gale beats the lockers like a mad man. Surely he's lost it.

"I'll tell you how she sounds under me, Mellark. Give you something to play into you're fantasy."

...

"You should've beat the shit out of him, Peeta! You know you could have," Finnick tells him on the walk home, being one of his only friends to actually witness what the whole school was now calling "a beat down". It had been a matter of minutes and everyone knew of it. Peeta could feel the eyes on him as he made his way to his locker at the end of the day, avoiding his brothers in hopes he could escape their teasing for at least another two hours.

Gale had denied having interaction with the whole thing but the dark purple bruise on Peetas jaw was hard to disguise. The small chip in his tooth was too. But he had taken it like a champ or so some of his teammates told him.

"I'm not going to hit him, Finn. I don't fight," Peeta says, reaching up to rub the raw spot.

"But you _should've_! God, I was about to hit him but you're a lot stronger than me and I probably would've done more harm than good," Finnick says, running his hands through his hair like a mad man. He is right. He would've done more harm than good and Peeta is almost happy no one decided to stand up for him in that moment. The last thing he needed was for the team to be divided.

His parents are furious when he returns home, forcing him to explain in vivid detail everything. But he doesn't want to get Gale in trouble for reasons he cannot understand. Maybe just another way of protecting Katniss, he doesn't know. But he tells them his helmet wasn't on the right way and that he landed on the ground strange. Neither of them believes him. When his brothers get home, he'll have to relay the story to them to make sure they get the right information.

When the knock comes on his door a short time later, he's expecting it to be the twins, anxious to hear the story of what actually happened. They had not been there at that moment and he was glad. No doubt they would have done something irrational.

But the head that peeks around the door doesn't belong to Rye nor Wheaton. It's Katniss.

Her eyes are red, puffy as if she's been crying and without hesitation she bounds across the room, throwing her arms around Peetas neck as he struggled to sit up in bed. She's crying, sobbing, actually, into the neck of his shirt, whispering words he doesn't understand and shaking. He's worried. Is she hurt?

"Katniss, what's wrong?" He asks, guiding her shoulders away from him so he can look into her eyes. Their glassy, wondering as they pass over his face, stopping on the mark on his jaw. She raises her hands to touch the bruised area, one hand flying to cover another sob that threatens to spill out of her mouth.

"I'm so sorry," she weeps. Weeps as if she was the one who took the swing and wounded him.

"It wasn't your fault, Katniss. I'm okay," he says. And he is. Other than the slight pain he feels, he's fine. Never better, actually, with her practically lying on top of him.

"I should've..."

"What could you have done, Katniss?"

She kisses him then. Her lips press tightly to his so unexpectedly he almost doesn't respond. Much like what happened with Clove in the stairwell all those months ago but this is much different. This is something he wants. Something he has been dreaming about for months now.

When he opens his eyes for a moment, hers are closed, his eyebrows knitted tightly together as she works her lips against his. He worries she may be able to feel his growing erection, the one that she is practically sitting on. But if she does, she says nothing.

Peeta could die happy now. He would gladly take a punch every minute of every day if it meant he was able to relive this moment with Katniss over and over again. And he's sure he would relive it over and over and over again.

"Peeta, where are-HOLY SHIT!"

Finnicks loud roar pull them apart. Katniss falling to the floor as she rolls from his lap, Peeta scattering to find a piece of clothing to hide the tent in his pants. Their faces grow red under Finnicks stare, a slow grin growing on his face by the minute.

The scream had alerted his brothers who were, now, also standing in the doorway, Rye with his mouth hanging open in surprise and Wheaton with his a hand in his hair. There were no words spoken for what felt like ever.

Finally Katniss grabs her discarded purse from off the floor, pushing through the wall that the boys have created much to Peetas displeasure. "Katniss, wait!" He calls after her but it's too late. She's already gone and he watches from the window as she sprints across the lawn.

"Well, well, well. Here I was thinking my best friend was going to need a little cheering up but much to my surprise, Ms. Katniss Everdeen was already doing that for him," Finnick jokes.

His brothers laugh. Peeta screams.

"We'll leave you alone to rub out your frustrations."

...

A million questions swam through his head that night.

What had become of her and Gale? Had they broken up? Were they on a break? Had he told her about their fight or had she heard about it from someone else? Why didn't she go to Gales aid first? He was her boyfriend. Did she kiss him out of pity or because she wanted too?

He's questions are answered the next day during lunch when she sits by his side at the table he shares with his friends, lacing her hand through his for all to see.

He smiled at her and she at him.

What an interesting summer the two would have.

* * *

Another story? I know but bare with me. I couldn't get the idea out of my head. Each chapter will depict a year.

the song in which this story is based off of is "Youth" by Daughters. I would recommend listening to it. It's a beautiful song. Thanks!  
-B


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

_"we are the reckless, we are the wild youth"_

_15-16: Sophomore year_

There was a gradual shift in Peetas demeanor that anyone within a ten feet radius could detect. He was happy, much happier and the only reason being for the quiet brunette sitting in the stands as he sent the ball flying high in the air.

The two-a-days had started in early August, meaning he no longer had days on end to sit around with Katniss, lounge about her house and ravish in the feeling of having a girlfriend. He was a frequent at the Everdeen home now. His brothers had left for their respective colleges and his mother was even more of a pain now that the whole town knew of the pair.

"You're wasting your time with a Seam brat," she tells him, stomping around the house or the bakery or sometimes even in public. He ignores his mothers rants. He doesn't see her that way.

The transition between friends into a relationship had been a long, at times awkward one but they made it work the best they could. And it was going well. Really really well.

Peeta is so distracted by Katnisses figure, her nose in the book they were supposed to read over the break, that he doesn't even notice Thresh hurling towards him. He takes a particularly hard hit, taking a few moment to regain his bearings and get to his feet. "Sorry, man," Thresh apologizes, giving him a hand up.

"Nah, man. I should've been paying attention," Peeta groans, stretching the pulls from his muscles. But it was so hard to pay attention. So hard to pay attention when every few seconds Katniss would run a hand through the long dark hair that Peeta loved to get lost in. Or the way she would stand every few minutes to stretch her muscles, her back bending and her shirt rising to show the little bit of skin on her hipbones.

"Don't make me start making these closed practices Mellark!" Coach Abernathy screams from the sideline, his eyes making the same beeline Peetas were. He mumbles out an apology and runs back towards the huddle, trying his hardest to ignore the hard stares his getting from Gale Hawthorne.

Practice ends with ease and he skips the shower just so he can get back to Katniss.

...

"Are you excited about school starting?" Peeta asks. He and Katniss are laid out on the makeshift cot Prim had created for the sleepover she was having. All the girls had long retired to bed and Ms. Everdeen was still not home from her shift at the hospital.

Katniss wouldn't tell Peeta much about her family and he heard nothing about her dad. But he never heard any of them speak about him so he assumed it was a sore subject. Ms. Everdeen would leave in the early hours of the morning, sometimes take two shifts which left Katniss to take care of Prim in the night. Katniss said it was because they needed the money but Peeta got the sharpest feeling in his stomach that perhaps the older women was avoiding her children. Why she would want too, he didn't know but it was none of his business.

"No, not really," Katniss answers, her fingers toying with his, picking at the dead skin from the long hours of football training he was enduring. "I'm going to miss spending all my time with you."

"I know," Peeta says. He would too. His lips caress her hair.

"You're so stiff Peeta," Katniss comments, moving around him to massage his shoulders. His muscled ached every time he moved and nothing felt better than this. Nothing felt better than Katnisses nimble fingers working and unworking the muscles until the ache disappeared.

"You should look into this as a job," he whispers, a groan releasing him when she hits a particularly sensitive spot. Katniss just laughs, her lips moving to his exposed shoulder that the man tank he wears doesn't cover. He feels the stir in his belly that he always gets near her and prays that Ms. Everdeen isn't coming home for at least another hour.

"I feel better now," Peeta mumbles, turning on his knees so his lips connect with hers. The kiss is slow at first, like they always are. But it grows, her teeth nipping here and his tongue soothing there. They've become very good at it in the weeks they've been together and Peeta wonders how he lasted so long without knowing what her kisses felt like. Her lips tasted of the chapstick she wore, always cherry and sometimes mint. He always knew she was into the kiss by the way her hands would move to tangle in his hair, pulling and tugging and manipulating his head into going which ever way she wanted it too. Peeta didn't mind in the least. He would do backflips for Katniss if that is what she asked of him.

She put a strong hand on his chest, moving him to lie back. She hovers over his body, her lips moving from his to kiss a path down his neck, then across his collarbone until she comes back up and then repeats the process. When she did the first time, Peeta was sure it would be the end of him. Every time after, he was sure it would be the end of him.

His pants were growing incredibly tight and he longed to rid himself of them. But he didn't want to insinuate anything. The most clothes any of them had shucked were the sweaty t-shirt that Peeta wore once and the cover-up of Katnisses bathing suit one day when they were swimming in the pool at the Mellarks. Other than that, all clothes had stayed on and Peeta didn't want to rush her. He would take it as slow as she needed. He would wait a lifetime for her if that's what it meant.

"Peeta, move your hands," she whispers suddenly. He worries that maybe they've moved from her hips while he's been consumed in thought but when he peers down, their where he left them. When she senses his obvious confusion, she grabs ahold of his hands, moving them up her rib cage until they settle just under her clothed breast.

Peeta lets out an internal sigh, trying to remember whatever stupid advice his brothers had given him over the years. Not that he ever thought he'd use it but it seemed that fate had other plans. He silently thanks Rye and Wheaton in his head, making a mental note to call them after and share all the details.

So he moves his hands, placing them softly on her clad breasts, not moving for a moment. All he feels is the padding of the bra she wears and he longs to know what is underneath that only her eyes have ever seen. But he doesn't say anything, just continuing to kiss her. After a while he gives him hands a squeeze and nearly comes right then and there by the sound of pleasure he makes. Oh, for how long had he only dreamed that he'd hear those sounds. He would replay them in his mind over and over again he was sure.

Peeta experiments with the placement of his hands, giving a lit tug here and maybe a shaper pull there. Judging by the sounds he makes, he adjusts his assault on her breasts until she slowly grinding her hips into his. Holy. Shit.

Peeta attempts to be quiet, using her mouth as a muffling device for the loud moans he wants to release. Prim is in the other room. She is on the other side of that wall with three of her friends. The thought calms him down for a moment but only a moment because then Katniss has her shirt over her head. Now he sees what he's grabbing at. The black bra she wears is much more appealing to the eyes then the leopard print on his brothers had suggested.

"This is okay, right?" She asks, breathlessly. Peeta can only nod. It is more than okay. It is a million times more than okay. "Good."

She reattaches her lips to his, moving her tongue along his bottom lip as she begs for entrance he so willingly gives her. Her hands make their way under the Panem football t-shirt he wears, her fingers scraping over the skin underneath, over the taunt muscles that years of hard training had given him. Peeta knows there is no way he can stand anymore. He will only survive another three second before-

"Honey! I'm home," Ms. Everdeen blares through the doorway, the sound of her keys resting on the hook as she shakes off her coat.

Peeta pushes Katniss off his lap in a moment, grabbing her shirt and throwing it in her direction without even needing to be told. Peetas hand shake as he readjusts the obvious erection, standing to his feet and too attention like he was a solider in the army. "Don't look so suspicious!" Katniss snarls. He chances a glance back at her. She's already dressed.

By the time Ms. Everdeen saunters into the living room, both Peeta and Katniss are looking wide eyed and guilty. Katniss whispers hello to her mother, busying herself with cleaning the living room like the two of them were supposed too.

Ms. Everdeen smiles at Peeta, unrolling her hair from the pin that she wears on her night shift. "How are you today, Peeta?" She asks, her eyes falling to the heap of pillows and blankets on the floor of her living room. She begins picking up too.

"Never better, Ms. Everdeen," Peeta says, looking around for his discarded shoes. He should probably go now, call Finnick and ask him to fetch him by the gas station. Ms. Everdeen was supposed to giving him a ride home once she came back from work but that was before he had groped his daughter in her own home while she was away. He feels guilty, the redness that's surely covering his body a sign. "I should actually be getting home."

"So soon?" Katniss asks, coming up behind him to snake her arms around his waist.

"Yeah, I should really be getting home. School starts Monday and I have nothing ready," Peeta says. It's not a lie. He has't even looked at the backpack and supplies sitting in the corner of the room. "Finnick is going to give me a ride home."

"Nonsense. I'll do it!" Ms. Everdeen says, grabbing ahold of her car keys and walking to the front door, not giving Peeta any moments to object. Not that he would. He didn't want to be rude. He turns to Katniss who is stifling a laugh, holding her hand over her mouth as Peetas body turns a deeper shade of red.

"You aren't going to ride with us?" Peeta asks when Katniss makes no advance to the door. She shakes her head, moving around him and giving him a soft kiss on his cheek.

It's was a long, long ride.

...

The first day of school rolls around quick and Peeta walks in with Katniss on his arm. They ignore all the stares from their classmates, the ones who have never seen the couple actually together.

It had been a long summer and a lot of things had changed.

Cato and Glimmer were together now, probably the most good looking and obnoxious couple Panem had to offer. They spent the first hours of the morning making out in the back of Finnicks car, which he'd gotten on his birthday early in August.

That was another thing. Finnick could now drive and in a months time, Thresh would be able too. Peeta didn't get his license till March but with all of his friends already receiving theres, he didn't feel the pressure. It made for sneaking out to see Katniss a whole lot easier and the boys no longer felt pressure to be confined to their homes.

Thresh and Johanna had gotten together. They seemed like an awkward couple, weird at time. Johanna was very blunt. Thresh was mostly quiet. Peeta didn't see how the dynamic worked but Thresh had promised they were having a good time. So Peeta left it at that, not wanting to pry to hard on his friend.

Katniss had grown on his friends like he knew she would. In fact, the first time Finnick and Katniss hung out alone, he couldn't chase away the growing bit of jealousy he felt towards them. They had both told him it was nothing to worry about. Finnick wasn't her type. Katniss wasn't his.

"Look who decided to join us," Thom announces, opening up his arms to Katniss who is hesitant at first. Thom is a nice guy; always a little touchy but a nice guy. "We haven't seen the two of you in what feels like ages."

"We've been around," Katniss comments, taking a seat next to Madge who has, also, began to hang out more and more with his friends.

The bell rings after a few moments of mindless chatter, Peeta and Katniss going there separate ways with a small kiss on the lips.

It was going to be a good year.

...

The news cameras are on the field the morning of the first game because football was the only exciting thing to happen in Panem. There was a rush on the field and much to Coach Abernathys dismay, all of the football program, including him, had to be in attendance.

Peeta was a hot item that morning, every news station wanting to speak only with him about how it feels to be in his brothers shadow and if he thinks he'll ever make a name for himself. They don't really talk to him about the game or about how he feel starting. They just talk and talk and talk about things that have nothing to do with him. He gets frustrated after the third interview, stalking off into the locker room and ignoring the calls for him to return. There were plenty of other players to speak too.

He finds Coach Abernathy there as well, sipping what doesn't appear to be water from his water bottle. His eyes are on the small TV in the corner they use to watch film. He's watching the View.

"Hey Coach," Peeta greets, taking a seat beside him and removing the jersey he was forced to wear for press reasons.

"They get to you too, boy?" Coach asks, taking another sip of his water bottle, sighing as it goes down in to his system.

"All they want to know about is 'living in my brothers shadow' and what their chances are on starting this year," Peeta answers, his brow furrowing. "I didn't think I was living in their shadows until every person out there assured me I was."

Coach Abernathy scoffs, putting his hands behind his head as Barbra Walters comments on something. "Their all a bunch of pricks who spend their days thinking of ways to crush boys like you for the sake of getting a news story," Coach Abernathy says. "And their only doing it because their still living in their own shadows, wallowing around in this god forsaken town, thinking their doing something important when it actuality, they aren't doing shit."

Peeta says nothing, just watch the sullen look on Coach Abernathy face. Maybe he was grouping himself in the same category.

"If anybody's getting out of this town, it's you boy," He says. "You're living in no ones shadow, trust me. I would know."

...

Their down in the fourth quarter, Peeta having thrown two interceptions and Finnick dropping two passes. The other team is big, one hundred pounds heavier than the heaviest guy they have. Peeta has been getting pummeled all night, his back hitting the ground more times than he can count.

"Peeta, what do we run?" Luke, one of his teammates, yells above the roar of the crowd. They have three minutes left, three minutes to win this game and assure the town that this season will not be like the last one. Peeta feels the heat, feels the pressure from everyone. He has outperformed by a long shot but for some reason it doesn't seem to be enough.

Peeta calls out a play, one that will be simple enough to master; maybe get them a first down if their lucky. He sends the ball flying, flying high above the head of the defense. Finnick is down the field, a good ten yards away from the end zone and if he can just manage to catch this ball, they will win the game and maybe Peeta can stop living in the shadows.

"Go Finnick! GO!" He yells though he knows he won't be able to hear him. He hits the ground a half a second later, his arms going to his sides to attempt and catch himself. He hears nothing, nothing but the sound of his body hitting the turf for a moment but then there is a roar. A great roar that is much louder than just the regular chant. When he looks up, he sees Finnick in the end zone, the whole team enveloping him as the clock runs to zero.

They've done it. _He's_ done it.

...

"Someone get this boy a shot!" Finnick screams over the party, raising Peetas hand high above his head like he just one a boxing match. It had become a tradition, of some sort, to have a party after the first game. Everyone's invited. Always at the Mellarks though now, Peetas brothers weren't there to help him. It was just Peeta.

Katniss was on his arm, laughing loudly in agreement as the entire party began to chant "shot, shot, shot, shot!". He looks to her, her eyes locked on his as she reaches up to place a kiss on his cheek. He downs the shot, wincing as the alcohol settles into his system, then placing a kiss on Katnisses mouth which results in another round of screaming.

"Let's party you assholes!" Finnick announces, jumping from the countertop he was standing upon, opting for everyone to take another round. No one wants too. The party has been going on for well over two hours and everyone was starting to feel the effects already. But Finnick was getting black-out drunk, at least that is what he'd told them all before. "It's a celebration!"

"Some of us actually want to remember this night," Thresh says, sipping from the plastic cup he holds in his hand. Johanna, on the other hand, agrees to the shot and downs it with Finnick, shaking her head rapidly from side to side. Finnick screams again and Peeta wonders what kind of night he's in for.

"This is fun," Katniss comments once the group has dispersed. She takes a large swig of her own concoction, prompting Peeta to do the same. "I've never seen half of these people before."

"Most are from the other teams school," Peeta says. "Our parties have become kind of famous so to say."

"Hm. We'll I'm not all that interested in being at the party anymore," Katniss whispers into his ear, her teeth tugging on his earlobe for only half a second. When she pulls away, her eyes are dark with desire and before she has a chance to say another word, Peeta hoists her up over her shoulder, running up the stairs with her laughing and ignoring all the looks he gets as he does so.

He kicks the door to his room open, only to already find it occupied with two seniors. "Get the fuck out dude!" The guy yells, using his body to shield his girlfriends naked one. Katniss and Peeta laugh loudly, continuing down the hall until they get to Ryes room which is, thankfully, empty. He locks the door with his left hand, his other going to discard the shirt he has on.

"A little presumptuous, are we?" Katniss teases, raising up on her tip-toes to kiss Peetas lips, her hands moving over the expanse of his back. His muscles flex under her touch and when she claws her way down his back with her nails, he can't keep in his moan of approval. "Take off my shirt," she whispers in his ear, biting his lobe softly once again.

Since that day in the Everdeen home, Katniss has become a lot more comfortable with her body, mostly because Peeta has to fight every sense he has when he sees it. She lets him take her shirt off, one time her shorts, never anything more than that but Katniss Everdeen in just her underwear is good enough for him. He would never complain.

He complies easily, removing the shirt from her body. His eyes widen when he sees whats underneath. "Like it?" She whispers, moving to sit on the top of Ryes freshly made bed. He can only nod. Her bra is different, light orange with lace on the bottom of the cups, pushing her breasts up to attention, the color just like the sunset. Peetas favorite color. "I got it the other day. I thought you might like it," she says, a blush forming on her cheeks.

"Katniss," he whimpers, moving over her in a minute, his lips claiming hers as his hands claw at the piece of material. "You're so beautiful."

She blushes at the statement, her lips sucking his pulse point and he's sure he's lost all ability to speak. "My shorts too please."

He doesn't need to be told twice. Peetas hands play with the button of her shorts, unsnapping them and pushing them down her legs. Now he sees it all. The ensemble. The matching pieces of underwear and their is no doubt in his mind she had planned this.

Peetas hands make their way to her back side, squeezing the fat flesh there that rest perfectly in his hands. It's her turn to moan. "Oh god Katniss."'

"I can't be the only one naked here. Shuck some clothes mister," she says, prying down the zipper of his jean while he works on his belt. The boxer briefs he wears underneath are unable to hide anything and when her eyes land on his growing erection, he's worried he's scared her.

But then he grows worried. As turned on as he is right now, he's not sure he's ready for what her actions are insinuating. Had she done this before? They'd never spoken about their private intimate moments, maybe she had done something with Gale. Something he didn't know about...

"What's wrong? Are you not enjoying this?" She questions, her eyes looking up at him. He realizes now he hasn't moved in probably five minutes.

"I just..." He stutters and a look of panic crosses over her features. She reaches around him to grab her discarded shirt, keeping it close to her body just in case he turns her away. "I can't have sex with you tonight, Katniss."

A look of surprise crosses over her. "I wasn't going to have sex with you Peeta."

"You weren't?" He asks. Peeta feels the moment of intimacy slowly passing.

"No, I just... Johanna said you might like this," she says, motioning down to her body. He should thank Johanna because he absolutely loved it. "But I'm not ready to have sex with you yet. I just thought we could maybe just try something we'd never tried before."

Peetas cheeks burn and he curses himself. "We still can!" He pleads, leaning down to try and capture her lips. But she turns her head to the side and they land on her cheek.

"Not tonight, Peeta. I guess I don't feel comfortable being in Ryes room first of all and there being two hundred people downstairs," Katniss says, pushing his body off of hers. She doesn't dress right away, just saunters around the room looking for every bit of clothing they lost along the way. Peeta could get used to seeing her this way.

"I'm sorry I ruined the moment," Peeta apologizes, running his hands over his face.

Katniss just smiles sadly.

...

"So you took her off your dick?" Marvel asks as they clean up the yard, being the only one sober enough to do so. Katniss was asleep in his bed, snuggled up against Annie. She had stayed the night, Finnick being to drunk to drive anyone home. Actually, almost everyone stayed in his bed and in Wheatons and in Ryes. Peeta was demoted to the couch by the time the party had died down and only his immediate friends were left.

"I didn't take her off my dick, Marvel. Jeez," Peeta says, throwing a round of plastic cups his way. "I'm just not ready to have sex and I didn't mean to ruin the mood but we were getting down to just our underwear and, I don't know. I panicked you could say."

"Oh Peeta. You still have so much to learn about the ways of the world," Marvel says.

"And what do you know about the ways of the world, Marvel?" Peeta asks in disbelief, wiping down a spot where there must have been a spill. Why were people such pigs in another persons home?

"I know that when a women is getting naked in front of me I don't ask her to put her clothes back on. That's for damn sure."

...

"You know who you should ask to the football mixer. Delly Cartwright! She is such a sweet girl," Mrs. Mellark says, drinking the remainder of white wine in her glass.

The Mellarks were having dinner as a family, eating off of the steaks that Peetas father had cooked in honor of an anniversary of some sort. Peeta had zoned out of the conversation. Life at home was much more dull without his brothers. He also kept checking his phone for messages from Katniss which were coming in rapidly. Apparently, Prim bought a cat, much to Katnisses annoyance and Peeta was getting the worst of the ranting. He didn't mind though. It was a good distraction.

Peeta groans quietly to himself, taking a sip of his water. "I have a girlfriend mom. I'm taking Katniss," he says for the twentieth time. But his mother would never understand; she could not understand. His father said nothing and busied himself in reading the news in the paper. He would not interfere.

"She is not someone you want to present yourself, Peeta. Believe me," she scolds.

"How would you know? You never speak to her," Peeta says.

"Because I don't want to present myself with people like that," she says. "Bannock, please tell your son what I am trying to say."

Peetas father says nothing because even he doesn't know what she is trying to say. She is being irrational among many other things though Mr. Mellark would never say the words in front of Peeta. Years of parenting had taught him what to do and what not to do.

When no one speaks, Mrs. Mellark does. "Fine, Peeta. Take the girl but you will see what I mean."

...

The football mixer is held at the country club on the westside of town, atop the green golf course that overlooks the city. The September air is cooling, making sitting outside seem more enjoyable and less like a chore. The players sit at long tables, their dates beside them as the coaching staff and boosters speak about all things Panem has too offer and how this year will be "the best one yet".

Finnick arrives at the Mellark residence at a quarter to six, dressed sharply in slacks and a button up, Annie on his arm looking stunning in a green dress. Peetas mother insists on taking pictures before Katniss arrives though they all refuse.

When Katniss does arrive, he is sure she is the most beautiful girl on the planet. Her hair down, curled all throughout, pulled back so you can see her face which is painted with the tiniest bit of makeup. She wears a red dress, one that blows rapidly in the wind, her heels making her legs look as though they go on and on.

Not only does Peetas mouth drop but Finnicks as well. He says nothing, just offers his fist to Peeta. Peeta does the same.

"You look beautiful," he greets, enveloping her in a hug. Peeta can feel the eyes on the two of them but tries his best to ignore them, focusing on the fresh scent of Katnisses hair as it washes over his face.

"You look pretty good yourself," she compliments, taking his hand as they all make their way to Finnicks car. "How long is this thing?"

"Hours," they all answer in unison, already groaning in despair.

And hours the football mixer takes.

Coach Abernathy doesn't talk for long, maybe fifteen minutes at the most but it seems every other male within the room has an hour long speech they wish to give. The head coach passed out a long time ago, the beers and wine their serving to the adults obviously getting to him. Peeta wishes he was so lucky but with Katniss at his side, it is almost bearable.

She had picked at dinner, refused desert, and was now only eyeing the coffee they had set in front of them. Peeta refused his as well so Finnick shot it back, more energetic than ever with a few kicks of caffeine in his system. But something was bothering Katniss; Peeta knew it. He knew it by the way she ignored the hand on her thigh and the way she worried her lip as her eyes shot around the room, almost as if she were on high alert. He asked her no questions, not wanting to draw any attention to the two. He simply held on to the back of her chair.

They are dismissed a little after ten. Peetas parents offer to give Katniss a ride home but he would much rather it be Finnick in order to avoid the tense car ride that was bound to happen. His father says hello to Katniss. His mother smiles.

"That is the most beautiful dress I have ever seen," Mr. Mellark offers, enveloping the small girl in a hug. "Peeta sure knows how to pick em'."

Peeta smiles, knowing his father is only saying these things in front of his mother to aggravate her and by the way her nails sink into her husbands forearm, he knows they've done their job. He meets his fathers sullen eyes for half a second, only long enough to catch the smirk similar to his playing on his lips. Then the two are gone, probably so Mrs. Mellark can give him an earful.

"Are you party animals ready to go?" Finnick asks, his arms visibly shaking as a result of all the coffee the boy has consumed.

"Maybe you should lay off on the caffeine next time," Katniss points out, laughing as Annie tries desperately to still his arm. When she manages to do that, his legs begin moving in tandem. He is lost to the effects and the four of them laugh.

"If we weren't drinking at this thing, I needed something to get me through it," Finnick says and they all understand. Four hours had been long enough and they all wish to escape this retched golf course.

But they must wait because an array of people come up to Peeta, congratulating him on his achievements in the past five games, telling him how he's really come into his own this year and their so happy to see him play. The boosters have a field day attempting to recreate the last minute play Peeta and his team made in the last minutes of last weeks game again Erich Ville.

"I'll tell you, I've never seen anything like it," an old man says, panting and wheezing after running about ten yards to exaggerate the play.

"Well thank you but it's really my team. I couldn't do it without then," Peeta says humbly, earning a smile from Katniss as she hangs awkwardly on to his arm. "And thank you all so much but I really have to get my girlfriend home. It's getting late."

As their walking away, Katniss chances a look back at the men who are talking amongst themselves, their state rings secured on their right hands. "Is this what my life has in store for me?" Katniss asks, turning up to look at Peetas face.

"What do you mean?" He asks.

"Am I going to be the pretty girl that sits on your arm while you talk football to everyone?"

"Only if you want to be."

...

Seeing Gale Hawthorne for two hours every day puts a hamper on Peetas mood.

He can't escape the accusation in his eyes or the snide comments the boy makes in the huddle. Every one else on the team is done with hearing it. A whole season had come and gone, there was no reason for their to be any hostility. Everyone else was over it. Why couldn't he?

So when Gale lets Thresh through the line for the third time without attempting to make a block, Peeta has enough, unsnapping his helmet as soon as he's gotten off the turf and taking ahold of the back of Gales jersey. Hands grab at him immediately, trying to stop him before he does anything stupid but it's too late. His anger has gotten the best of him and he pushes Gale to the ground without a moment to waste.

"Hey! Hey!" Coach Abernathy yells from his place on the sidelines, making no move to actually go towards the boys, just giving them a verbal warning. When he does begin to move, it's slow and without purpose.

"You've got to be fucking kidding me, Gale!" Peeta yells, shoving off anxious hands who try and stop him. "You can't make a block? You can't make _that_ block?"

"Sorry, buddy," Gale says with mock sincerity. "Are you hurt? Did Peeta get an ouchy? Someone call 911 because we've got a cry baby!"

"You know what this is all about," Peeta says, his finger coming into contact with the front of Gales jersey.

"Enlighten me!" Gale screams.

"You're just jealous about Katniss! I don't know if you think her leaving you was my doing, but you're actions caused it so if you want to have a shitty attitude with anyone, it's going to need to be with yourself!" Peeta yells, his face flushed, his hands shaking. The boys no longer pull at Peeta and he no longer cares about making a scene. If Gale takes a punch, he'll get one back, simple. Peeta is trying hard to mentally prepare himself for it because a piece of him tells him it's coming.

"Oh please, Peeta. You think I give a shit and a half about that girl? Did she tell you we fucked?" Gale answers, coming in close so only Peeta will be able to hear the words. "Did she tell you about how she wrapped her little legs around me, how I had her screaming my-"

It's Peeta who throws the first punch. He knows the words are not true, surely they can't be. Katniss would have told him, wouldn't she?

Gale swings back, missing the first time but nailing the second. Peeta can taste the blood in his mouth but he doesn't care. He gets the chance to take a few more swings, one or two hitting Gale where he wanted them too before Thresh has him by the waist and is pulling him to the far end of the field. Gale is being pulled the opposite way, still yelling in anger.

"What are you doing man," Thresh says to Peeta, sitting him on the bench until his breathing returns to normal, his eyes losing the glazed look they had taken on.

Peeta doesn't have a chance to answer because the next thing he knows, he's being hoisted up by Coach Abernathy, his feet carrying him to the locker room. He goes without protest, knowing this is the part where he either gets kicked off the team or has two weeks suspension. He wonders how he'll tell his parents.

Coach Abernathy locks the door, walking around Peeta to take a seat in his desk chair, not saying anything for a good moment but continuing to drink from the water bottle he carries around. His tired eyes take a good look at Peeta, beaten and bruised but he doesn't think Gale looks any better. "Did you get that out of your system?" He asks after a few moments, biting on one of his nails.

Had he? He nods, taking a moment to spit the blood that had collected in his mouth into the trash can, sitting in one of the chairs provided.

"Good."

...

Katniss yells for hours at him, angry with his decision to punch Gale.

He doesn't tell her the things he said about her because they can't be true, can they?

...

All four of them are settled around the dinner table; Mr. and Mrs. Mellark, Peeta, and then Katniss, dressed in their nicest clothes as they chew on the duck Mrs. Mellark had prepared in honor of having Katniss over for dinner.

They had been dating for around four months now and Mr. Mellark had proposed the idea she come over for dinner for food and laughter and fun, as he had put it. Mrs. Mellark was against the idea. Peeta was even against the idea but his father had told him it wasn't up for discussion.

"I want to meet the girl my son is so in love with!" He'd said during their morning commute to the bakery.

So here they were, all sitting around the table in silence, enjoying the good food but not each others company. Katniss holds on tight to Peetas hand under the table, trying her best to keep her eyes down to ignore the looks from Mrs. Mellark she is receiving.

"So, Katniss. Do you plan on working once you turn sixteen," Mr. Mellark asks, taking a sip of the wine he kept coming.

Katniss nods, wiping her mouth with the napkin she had placed on her lap. "I do actually. I want to work in the hunting and sports good store on the west side of town," she says. "I really enjoy doing outdoorsy things and, I don't know, I guess it reminds me of life back in Iowa."

"Iowa? You lived in Iowa? Peeta never mentioned that," Mrs. Mellark says. But Peeta had mentioned it plenty of times. His mother just never listened to him when he spoke.

"Yes. That is where my sister and I were born," she says.

"Why did you move?" Mrs. Mellark asks, her curiosity suddenly heightened.

"My mother got a job as a nurse here in Panem and decided it would be a good, wholesome place to raise my sister and I."

"No resistance from your father on that?" Mrs. Mellark asks and her eyes flicker to Peeta because he had specifically told his family they were not to speak of Mr. Everdeen. But leave it to his mother to disregard his warnings.

Katniss is silent, her hand falling from Peetas and her eyes dropping down to her dinner plate which is still half full. "My father died when I was younger so, no," she answers quietly, excusing herself from the table. Peeta notices she takes her purse along with her.

He sits in silence with his parents for a few moments, Peeta so angry he could probably flip the table. He would if Katniss wasn't in the other room. His father has his eyes locked on his mother, surely he is just as angry as anyone. Mrs. Mellark looks unphased, untouched by the girls confession.

Peeta had known Mr. Everdeen wasn't around but he hadn't known the severity of it. He hadn't known he had died. Is that why they moved? To get away from the ghost of her father?

"Thanks guys," Peeta mumbles, sliding his chair back and sauntering out of the room to find Katniss. It isn't an easy job in his house, being it is so big, but he finds her sitting outside on the balcony he has in his room, her back to him, her eyes trained on the moon.

He takes a seat in the chair beside her, saying nothing but taking ahold of her hand. It's then he realizes she is crying, tears like the ones he'd seen last summer. She said nothing either, just held on to his hand and every so often, wiped her face.

"I'm so sorry, Katniss," he says finally, unable to take the silence any longer. It needed to be said anyway. His mother would never apologize; he was the next best thing.

"It's okay, Peeta," she says, running her thumb along the back of his hand soothingly.

"How come you never told me?" he asks, looking over at her.

She shrugs her shoulders. "I didn't want people here feeling sorry for me, I guess. Everyone back home just pitied Prim and I and, I don't know, I didn't want that anymore. Fresh start, you know? I didn't want you to talk to me just because you felt bad for me, I guess."

"You can tell me anything," he promises her, kneeling before her so she has no choice but to look at him. Her eyes are glossy, tired and she breaks down in his arms. He lets her because he knows how long she has probably been waiting to do this.

They don't go back down to dinner but when Ms. Everdeen arrives, her mother has packaged up all the left overs to send home with Katniss. Peeta knows this is her way of apologizing. It's not a real one but it's the best either of them will get.

...

"Boys, I have some news," Finnick announces on the ride to school one day. Peeta had known this was coming because Finnick had opted to take the long way to school, his go to move whenever he needed to talk about something.

"Who's pregnant?" Marvel jokes, at least he hopes it's a joke.

"No one know but I have found the women I'm going to marry and the mother of my children," he says, looking up at the boys through the rearview mirror.

Peeta groans loudly, rolling his eyes at his love struck friend. "Who?" He asks though he already knows the answer.

"Annie Cresta," Finnick says, a smile on his face as the car rolls to a stop at a red light.

No one says anything for a long while. They all just sit there in silence, not knowing wether to tell their friend he's lost his mind or congratulate him. When everyone starts to speak again, it's a mixture of both.

"You've lost it dude," Cato says just at the same moment Marvel says, "congrats man, that's great."

"One day, you too will find the women of your dreams. Keep the hope alive!"

Peeta sees Katniss waiting for him with Madge and he knows he has.

...

The day school gets out for thanksgiving break, Finnick has a party. It's pretty low key, not more than fifty people but once the drinks start flowing, things get a little out of hand.

Peeta is drunk and from the way Katniss hangs with an arm around his neck, he knows she's feeling it too. "This is so much fun," she slurs, downing the third shot Finnick placed within her grip. Peeta declines his own, knowing one of them needs to be present in order to make good decisions tonight.

"The best," Peeta says, his eyes roaming over Finnicks basement which is much to small for the amount of people in the room. If his parents were to come home now from whatever convention they were at this weekend, there would be no way everyone could get out. Peeta is starting to draw out his escape plan when Katnisses lips start making assault on the spot below his ear that always makes him melt.

"What do you say we get out of here," she says, licking the skin on his neck now. He's vaguley aware of the fact that they are in public, surrounded by millions of wandering eyes but her kisses are making him light headed. He could care less about all the people in this basement. Fuck the people in this basement.

"Where?" He asks. Finnicks younger brother and sister are asleep in their rooms and Peeta knows Finnick would kill him if they were to wake up now due to him and Katniss wanting some time alone. They could go to his house, he supposed. His mother and father would probably be at dinner. But that was a good three mile walk and he didn't want to kill the mood like he had the last time they were in this predicament. He needed an idea and he needed it now.

And then the lightbulb goes off.

He hoists Katniss to her feet, pulling her along with him as they make their way up the stairs. Finnick yells something to him about being safe but he doesn't catch it.

"Where are we going," Katniss asks once they've made their way into the cooling November air. "I left my jacket inside."

"You won't need it," he says, entering the pass code into Finnicks car, waiting a few moments before hearing the click. The doors are unlocked. When he looks to Katniss, her eyes are wide and her face pale. Her mouth hangs open at the suggestion. "Katniss, it's the only place I can think of. Please. He won't mind."

Katnisses eyes dart all around us. "What if someone sees?" She hisses, crossing her arms over her chest.

"It's dark. Everyone is inside. No one will see. He also has his windows tinted." The last part is a lie but Peeta is so desperate in this moment, he may say almost anything. He didn't know when it came to this but suddenly, he was here. Coaxing a girl into the backseat of Finnicks car. His life couldn't possibly get any better.

She reluctantly agrees, sliding into the backseat, giving him enough space to do the same. As soon as the doors close on either side of them, Katniss has her mouth on his, molding the two of them together for the most passionate kiss.

When she removes her own shirt, Peeta does the same. His disappointed to see that her orange bra did not make an appearance tonight but the black one she wears now looks just as beautiful on her. He moves his hands to cup her over the bra, moving and caressing and he, slowly, kisses her chest, licking a trail along her collarbone and then repeating the process several times.

"My jeans," Katniss gasps, moving her hands to Peetas belt buckle while he manages her own. "This is kind hard." She laughs when she realizes what she's just said and he does too.

"It's very hard," he jokes, wiggling his eyebrows at her as his pants are discarded. He opted to wear boxers today, hoping that this might be the way they ended up.

When their both in nothing but their underwear, Katniss reaches behind her back to dispose of the bra, her breasts hanging in Peetas face for the first time with nothing covering them. They aren't big, not like Glimmers or Cloves, but Peeta couldn't be more happy with them. They were perfect and Peeta tells her so.

She blushes at the statement, moving to cover herself as Peeta moves her so she is lying flat on her back. "Don't," he pleads, moving her hands away so he can see what he's touching. "You're beautiful, Katniss. I've always thought you were beautiful."

He kisses her, his mouth moving slowly. He wants her to know he means it; to know she is the most beautiful girl in his world and he will spend the rest of his life trying to prove that to her. He wanted her to know that he loved her but he wouldn't say the words now.

"We don't have to do anything, Katniss," he says then, realizing he may be pressuring her. She didn't want to get in the car in the first place and now, here she was, nearly naked underneath him. "We can sit here and talk for the rest of the night if that's what you want."

Katniss pulls away, looking into Peetas eyes as he stares down at her, his eyes never leaving her eyes. He no longer sees the glazed look he saw before, obviously his kisses sobering her up. But she just shakes her head, lifting her head again to meet Peetas.

"I want too," she whispers. He's not sure what "wanting too" has in store but whatever it is, he wants to, too. "Peeta, take my underwear off."

Now it's his turn to be worried. What exactly does he do once the underwear are off?

But he peels the black clothing away, tucking them in his back pocket for safe keeping. He needed proof for when his brothers question them, if she even let him keep them at the end of the night.

The car was getting drastically hotter, both Katniss and Peetas body heat combining to make the car fog up. If anyone was to walk by at this moment, they would know exactly what was happening in the old car. It would be like the scene in Titanic.

"Once again, we don't have to do a-"

"Shut up, Peeta," Katniss says, grabbing ahold of his hand and placing it on one of her thighs. "I'm nervous enough as is, I don't need you asking me a million questions."

Well okay then.

Without wasting another moment, Peeta thinks back to all the porn he's watched over the years. He knows first thing is first. He takes one of his fingers, pulling it through her wet heat until a moan falls from her lips, her eyes shutting as soon as Peeta makes contact with a little nub at the apex of her thighs. What had his brothers said to do to that? He knows it's something...

"Press," Katniss moans then, her eyes now open and watching him as he moves. He raises an eyebrow in confusion, begging her to say something else. He was embarrassed about his lack of experience to say the least but at least he was learning with Katniss. He wouldn't want it any other way. "Press down right there, Peeta."

And he does, his thumb playing with the nub, running back and forth, his padded fingers getting slick with her own arousal which was spilling over. He would have to apologize to Finnick later for this if they left a stain. She moans loudly then, her hips bucking in time with his motions and Peeta is surprised her hasn't come yet. He is on the brink, he can feel it, but he isn't worried about himself right now. He's worried about Katniss, and the way she's clawing at his back, and purring his name. If only Gale Hawthorne could see this now. Thinking of Gale is putting him in a bad mood so he tries to stop himself.

"God, Katniss, you're so wet," Peeta moans, slipping one finger inside of me as his thumb continues it's assault.

"It's all for you, Peeta," she moans, her hips bucking rather quickly now. He knows she's close. He can feel the way her walls contract around him. The way her eyes squeeze shut and her hands grip the headrests. "Shit, Peeta, I'm coming," she says then, her hips buckling wildly against his hands. He moves steadily, not stopping until her moans have subsided and her breathing had returned to normal.

He reluctantly pulls his fingers from her then, closing his eyes as he puts the digits into his mouth, taking away the last bit of arousal. He moans at the taste. Katniss does the same. "Have you done that before?" She asks then, staring up at him with hooded eyes. He shakes his head. "You were so good at it."

"I have two older brothers," he says. "And the internet, so..." This provokes a laugh from her, then she's kissing him again, nibbling on his lips and he knows she can taste herself on his tongue.

"Did you come?" Katniss asks, her eyes landing to the erection his boxers can no longer hide. Surprisingly, no, he hasn't. He shakes his head. "Good."

Then she slips her hand down the front of his pants, her hand making a small fist around him and pumping up and down. His eyes rolls in the back of his head. How many days had he laid awake at night just dreaming that he would only be so lucky. He was in his own personal heaven and he wished he could stay there forever.

"Do you like this," she asks huskily. He opens his eyes for half a second, to meet hers.

"Perfect. Everything about you is so perfect," he groans, unable to stop himself from pushing up into her hand.

When her grip on him tightens, he looses it, coming in spurts on her as he bucks his hips much like she had. He's unable to stop the long stream of curse words he also says.

When his own breathing has returned to normal, he closes his eyes and collapses against her, his eyes falling shut against her skin.

"I really loved that, Peeta," Katniss says, combing her fingers through his sweaty hair.

And I really love you, Peeta thinks to himself.

...

"Which one of you asshole had sex in my car last night?" Finnick yells, wildly parading around the kitchen. His younger siblings sit at the table, looking wide eyed and uncomfortable as their older brother speaks to his friends, his eyes wild and savage.

Peetas eyes go to the table.

"Which one of you was it?" He asks again, this time his voice low but with the same intensity.

No one says anything.

"My car smells like straight-up sex!"

"How do you know what sex smells like," Finnicks sister asks, her eyebrows shooting up.

"Get the fuck outta here," he curses, sending his siblings scrambling from the room, their uneaten pancakes that Peeta made in hand.

"Well," Peeta finally speaks up, his cheeks burning as his friends turn to look at him. "Katniss and I didn't have sex but we, you know, did things." The truth was bound to come out at some point.

Finnick doesn't stay mad when he hears this. He just makes Peeta give him thirty dollars to get the thing cleaned.

...

They don't really ever talk about what happened between them in the car but there are days when Katniss will say something that shoots straight to Peetas groin and Peeta will say something that makes Katniss blush.

They do it again, once at Katnisses house when Prim is staying with a friend. Another time in Peetas bedroom when his parents believe them to be studying.

Each time, after, he almost threatens to say the three words he's been dying too. But he doesn't want her too run.

...

His brothers come home for the Christmas holidays and for a moment, Peeta feel likes he could cry at the sight of them, each walking from their terminals to meet their family.

Rye actually does tear up when he sees Wheaton for the first time in months. Being twins, they rarely spent any time away from each other and college had torn them apart. Peetas mother does cry and they have a nice family moment in the airport. Once they get home, all is the same.

"How's life here in Panem, Peet," Rye asks, sitting atop Peetas bed. Wheaton closes the door, locking it with one hand. He knows this will be a long night.

"Pretty good," Peeta answers simply.

"Your big bros got you something for Christmas but if mom or dad find it, you have no idea where you got it from, you hear?" Wheaton says, pulling the black bag from around his back and placing it on Peetas desk.

Peeta unwraps a 100 pack of condoms they didn't even know were sold in stores.

He looks up at his brothers, his face red with embarrassment. The twins laugh, slapping palms and cracking jokes about Katniss and if he's gotten any yet. Peeta smiles.

Just like old times.

...

The school holds a winter formal each year for the student body of Panem. Last year, Peeta had been so deep in self loathing, he didn't bother to even try and go. But this year, he had Katniss on his arm. This year was different.

"Do you want to go to Winter Formal," he asks her one day during lunch, when all of his friends are busy throwing grapes into Marvels mouth that he knows none of them will ease drop.

Katniss turns to him, her eyebrows knitting together in confusion. "Are you asking me to be your date?"

"Only if you want too," Peeta shrugs. And he really wanted her too.

"It's on Friday, no?" He counts the days in his head.

"Yes, Friday."

Katniss nods, smiling at him and then turning back to her conversation with Madge.

Peeta can't keep the smile off of his face.

...

"I don't like the idea of you spending hundreds of dollars on this girl for one dance, Peeta. That is all I'm saying," Mrs. Mellark rants, throwing her hands up in exasperation as the door closes behind Mrs. Cartwright who had come in to stock up on cookies from the bakery.

But Peeta knew the problem wasn't spending money for the dance, it was spending so much money of Katniss. His mother had felt guilty for approximately three hours after Katniss left the house after their tense dinner weeks ago. Once the 180 minutes had spent, she went right back to cursing the girl and claiming she was a bad influence on her son.

All the Mellark boys are working in the bakery this evening, mostly because the bakery had been short staffed almost all of December and his father was beat with trying to keep up. They didn't mind though, as long as their mother kept to herself in the back which didn't seem like it was going to happen. She had been relentless.

"it's my money mom and I will do with it what I please," Peeta answers. His parents gave him a little money here and there to spend after working in the bakery. He had saved a good chunk of it. And how much could flowers really cost? Finnick had said the ones he purchased for Annie were only fifty dollars. He could spare fifty dollars.

"And what are you going to do come March when you have no money to spend on gas?" She questions, crossing her arms over her chest.

"It's $50 mother. It won't break my bank, I promise you. I'll manage," he answers, rolling his eyes.

"And what is she going to do for you that is worth $50, Peeta?" His mother huffs, storming off the back room to sulk.

"She'll hope on that dick, that's what she'll do!" Rye whispers under his breath, chest bumping Wheaton. "Really though Peeta, you should think about renting a hotel room or something so you don't have to do it in the back of Finnicks car again." He already regrets telling his brothers that story.

"I can't afford a hotel room, one. And two, I don't want to pressure her to do anything she isn't ready for," Peeta says. Getting a hotel room automatically meant sex and the last thing he wanted to do was make Katniss feel like she was compelled to give him something.

"Peeta, always the noble one," Wheaton says, ruffling his hair and attending to the mother and daughter who have just walked in.

...

Finnick tells him he rented a hotel room for Annie and himself.

"You know, just in case she wants to get up on this," he jokes. "But in all seriousness, if she tells me she isn't ready, I'll just cancel the reservation."

...

The day of winter formal, no one goes to school in preparation. In fact, all the teachers just showed movies all day, knowing no one would be there.

So Peeta spends his day with his friends, picking up flowers for all of their girlfriends and then, pre gaming, as Finnick put it, by taking a few shots in Marvels basement. Finnick stays sober, so does Thresh. They are driving tonight after all.

He calls Katniss just before he leaves, lacing up his dress shoes and fixing the bow tie the lady at the shop had pinned on him. He feels like he's suffocating but all of his friends assure him, their feeling the same way. He doesn't know if it's the nerves or the alcohol but whatever it is, he doesn't like the feeling.

She answers on the third ring, music playing loudly in the background and he knows she must already be at Annies. "Hey baby!" She greets, shushing whoever is in the background talking loudly.

"Hey, Katniss. Are you ready?" He asks, not really knowing what else to say. Peeta just wanted to hear her voice, not really to have conversation. He found it hard to go three hours without speaking to her. He was in too deep.

"Yeah, just finished putting my dress on. I'm really excited about tonight, Peeta! I hope you know," she says.

"I am too."

"I have to go now. I'll see you in a few hours?" Peeta nods, then realizing Katniss won't be able to see him.

"Yeah, see you then."

...

He has a genuinely good time.

Katniss is a surprisingly good dancer and all of his friends enjoy her company.

Glimmer and Cato win some type of award, but by that point, everyone just cares about getting to the after parties that are sure to be happening around town. Peeta has heard of a few but if he's being honest, the only party he wants to be at is a party of one with Katniss Everdeen.

When they all decide to leave, Katniss tugs on his hand, walking in the direction of her own home versus to the car with the rest of their friends. "Where are we going?" Peeta asks, looking around him. She's unstrapped the silver heels she wore underneath the light pink dress, walking barefoot along the street. "That can't be very comfortable."

"Prim is at a sleepover and my mother is working. Wanna come over?"

...

Peeta has successfully brought her to an orgasm three times when, finally, she decides she's had enough, rolling the two of them over until Peeta is lying flat on his back, his mouth attached to hers in a battle of dominance.

"I have to be honest with you right now, Peeta," she tells me, moving down his body to suckle on his jaw.

"Hm?" Peeta asks, not even caring what it is she has to say, just hoping to relieve the pressure in his pants some time soon.

"I really want to have sex with you tonight," Katniss says, freezing and pulling away from him to judge the look on his face.

"Really?" Peeta gulps, his stomach churning.

"Yes but only if you want too," she says, her mouth falling open.

Peeta worries his lip. How could she think she wouldn't want too. He loved her. He would be honored to lose his virginity to her. If things went the way he planned, he would never even be inside another women. "I want too," Peeta whispers finally.

Then she's kissing him again, slowly but with purpose. He closes his eyes, relishing in the last moments of being pure, being a virgin. He rolls her over so she is on her back, knowing this will be easier for her if he's doing most of the work. It hurts for girls, the first time or so he's heard. The last thing he would want to do is hurt her, but someones got too. Why shouldn't it be him?

"We don't have to do this if you don't want too," he tells her, just to be sure. This was becoming his favorite line.

"I want too," she says, pecking his lips as he settles over her.

"I don't have a condom with me," Peeta mummers, remembering his brothers advice about never ever having sex without one. Shit. He knew he should've broken into his stash.

But Katniss reaches behind her head and pulls one from under the pillow, a slow smile playing on her lips. "I came prepared," she says. "I just don't know how to put it on exactly."

Peeta takes it from her, thinking back to health class in seventh grade when his teacher demonstrated with a banana. He rolls it down his length, pinching the tip to eliminate the air. His breath catches in his throat as he does this. He was really about to have sex. He was really about have sex with Katniss Everdeen...

"I've never done this before, Katniss," he admits then, looking down at her and swallowing hard. He knew how, of course. He wasn't stupid but somehow, being in the actual moment, he was much more frightened than he thought he would be. Would she enjoy this? Would she go back and laugh at him?

"Neither have I, Peeta," she says then, reaching for his face. She palms the side of his face, making him meet her eyes before giving Peeta a small smile, one with a million messages lying beneath the surface. Peeta had known Gale was lying, but hearing her say the words does ease his conscience.

"Together?" He asks, taking ahold of his erection in his hand, placing it at her entrance.

"Together," she agrees, wincing slightly as he eases himself in.

When he hits the resistance he knew would be there, he has to close his eyes for a moment, listening to the way Katnisses breathing increases. "I'm sorry," he whispers before seething himself fully inside her, nearly coming right then and there. He doesn't move, knowing it will take her a few seconds to get used to the feeling. But when he feels her walls contract around him the way they do his fingers, he can hold back no longer.

He moves slowly because he knows this is painful for her and if he moves any faster, this won't last longer than eleven seconds. But moves, listening to her soft pants. "Are you okay?" He asks, using one of his hands to wipe away the tears that have begun to fall. She just nods her head, giving him a tight smile.

He doesn't last long, groaning when he pushes in once more, his head falling to her chest as she empties himself inside of her, his forehead sticky with sweat.

When he falls on top of her, he fights the urge to cry. When he looks up at her, she's already begun.

...

He calls his brothers to come get him sometime later because Ms. Everdeen will be home soon. When he gets into the car, his brothers both have a smug look on their faces but they don't say anything for awhile.

"You have a good time?" Rye asks. Peeta nods.

"Best night of my life," Peeta confirms.

...

He takes his brothers advice seriously days before Christmas, going to the mall with them in hopes that they'll find something for Katniss. Something that she'll love.

"What is she getting you?" Wheaton asks, gnawing on the pretzel he had purchased upon arrival.

"I don't know, Wheaton. It's a surprise," Peeta groans in annoyance.

"Why don't we just get her a gift card?" Rye suggests, grabbing ahold of one too Chick-fil-a.

"I'm not getting her a fucking credit card, goddamit!" Peeta yells. Why he even brought his brothers along with him, he doesn't know. What he does know is the two of them are about get a kick in the balls.

"Someone needs to go over to Katnisses after this little adventure to grind his aggression out," Rye says, making a thrusting motion. A few people eye them as they pass. Peeta want to die.

"That's enough. You guys are no help. I will walk home. Bye," he says, dismissing the boys.

But out of the corner of his eye, Peeta spots the perfect gift.

...

Peeta goes over to the Everdeen house on Christmas morning after his own family had exchanged gifts. Peeta had a good Christmas, his mother subdued by the spiked eggnog and his father cheerful as ever. His brothers were giddy and friendly and not crude for once. The only thing that could make this day better was seeing Katniss.

Gift in hand, he knocks on the door which is answered by Prim, wearing the dress Katniss had purchased for her Christmas. "Hi, Peeta!" She greets, moving from side to side, her eyes darting down box in his hand. "Oooh, that looks expensive!"

Peeta laughs, a blush falling over his cheeks. "I brought something for you too," he tells her, pulling the box filled with hair bows from behind his back, presenting them to Prim with a smile on his face. "Katniss mentioned you might like them." The smile she wore tells him all he needs to know and a moment later her arms are wrapped around him.

Peeta gives her a quick hug, smiling to Katniss who has appeared in the doorway, a smirk on her own features. He likes this face much better than the scowl she commonly wears. "Merry Christmas! I've come bearing gifts," he greets, shoving the small rectangular box into his back pocket, not really wanting the gift to be presented in front of everyone.

"Lucky for you, so have I," Katniss smirks, pulling from behind her back a long box, one much larger than the one Peeta holds and, for a moment, he worries what he got her won't be enough. "My mother had to go into work today so we can go to my room if you'd like."

Peeta nods his head. He would very much like that.

He says goodbye to Prim who teases the two for a short while, making kissing noises and using her tongue to make suggestive themes. "If you only knew Prim," Peeta whispers below his breath in a tone he knows she won't be able to hear, ignoring the scowl that now graces Katnisses features as she turns to look at him.

"Or we can open these in the living room," she threatens, moving her body to form a barricade between Peeta and the door. Her stance is short lived and the minute Peetas fingers begin to tickle the sensitive flesh on her hips, her appearance falters and she bursts into a fit of giggles, a sound so unlike Katniss that Peeta has no choice but to laugh with her. "Enough! Enough. I give up"

"Now where is my present," Peeta demands, sitting atop her bed, smirking when he realizes the sheets on the soft mattress have been changed.

Katniss sits criss cross beside him, handing him the gift. Peeta unwraps it slowly, his eyebrows knitting together when his fingers come in contact with the smooth wood of the box she'd carved, his initials on the top, hers in the corner.

"Thank you, Katniss," he says, being at a loss for words. Peeta kicks himself in the foot now. He should've thought of something with a little more detail.

"That's not all," she says, reaching around his shaking hands to pull the latch on the underside. It falls open, inside all of Peetas favorite things. The books he liked as a child, his favorite movie, a pack of his favorite candy, and two caps with his favorite sports teams. Looking into the box, he can't even remember when he'd mentioned this all and how she had managed to remember.

"This is for me?" Peeta mumbles then, noticing the way her eyes are locked on his face, begging him to say something, anything.

Katniss nods, laughing as she does so. "Who else likes the Sun Devils as much as you do, Peeta?" She jokes, pulling the cap onto her own head, smiling with all her might. Peeta smiles too, wondering how he made it this long without knowing her.

"Thank you, Katniss," he says, pulling her into a hug, smelling the shampoo in her hair. He doesn't pull away until she lets out a long sigh, moving to sit on hip lap as he pulls his own present from the back pocket of his jeans. "For you."

"Oh, Peeta," she says before she's even unwrapped it, her fingers playing with the bow on the top. It's too small to be anything but jewelry.

"Just open it, Katniss," Peeta says, moving to undo the top for her.

"It's too expensive," she whispers under her breath, refusing to look at the thing. She knows whatever it is, she'll love it and won't be able to give it back. But Peeta pushes it into her grip, smiling until her eyes catch hold on the tiny silver plated necklace that lies in the box, a Katniss flower on the chain, sparkling in all it's glory before her.

Tears well up in her eyes, her thin hand moving to cover her mouth which it threatening to release the sob she's been holding in. "Oh, Peeta," she says again, turning the charm with her fingers, looking all about the room as if she thinks the piece of jewelry would be taken from her. But it was hers. It would always be hers. "How did you find this?"

"Old man at the jewelry store owed me a favor. It took him awhile to find the right mold for the thing but eventually, he did. It's not exactly the most realistic looking thing but it was as close as I could get it," Peeta explains, noting the way the blading man had complained for hours to him.

She wraps her arms around him, snuggling her face into the crook of his neck. He can feel the wet tears rolling down her cheeks. Why she's crying, he doesn't know but he'll take all he can get for the time being.

When he kisses her hair, she pulls away, taking the opportunity to kiss his lips.

...

"I have something serious to talk to you about," Peeta tells Finnick. The two are outside playing a quick game of basketball in the Odiars backyard.

"What is it," Finnick asks, jumping as he makes the shot easily into the basket. Peeta scoffs. Nothing but beginners luck.

He waits for a moment, the words catching in his throat. Finnick wouldn't tell anyone, he was certain. After all, Peeta hadn't told a soul Finnick still pees his bed. They were best friends and were grown up enough to keep each others secrets. Right?

"Katniss and I had sex," he whispers, his cheeks burning as his eyes turn back to look at the house. Mrs. Odiar is still cooking away in the kitchen, Mr. Odiars car not yet pulled into the driveway. The two are virtually alone but Peeta knows how Finnicks younger siblings enjoy lurking the shadows. He hopes they are not around now.

Finnick catches the ball as Peeta bounces it too him, his eyes taking a moment to focus on the boy before him, his mouth opening and closing several times before he makes the choice just to sit on the ground, his head in his hands and his feet tucked under him. Peeta wonders if he's in the early stages of an emotional breakdown but he says nothing, just watching the way Finnick rocks back and forth on his heels. He wonders if he's even been heard.

"I said-"

"I heard what you said, Peeta. I just need a moment," he says, his eyes moving over the other boy enviously. "You had sex with Katniss Everdeen?" He asks again in disbelief, his own eyebrows coming together. Peeta couldn't blame him for being so confused. He almost didn't believe it himself.

Peeta nods, his cheeks blushing, the three pairs of sweats he wears starting to constrict the blood flow in his body.

"Did it hurt?" Finnick asks. Peeta smirks being that this is the one time he is ahead of Finnick Odiar.

"For her, it did," Peeta says, going to rub the back of his neck. Peeta was sure Finnick would relay the news to Annie but he hoped that was as far as it would get. He had told Katniss he needed to talk to someone, someone who would be helpful and knowledgable about sex after the third time they had it a few days ago. She agreed, telling him it would be fine as long as the school didn't hear of it when the Christmas holidays were over. Peeta hoped that too. He was not a man to brag about his sexual escaped in the locker room or with his friends other than Finnick. He didn't want every one to know about the love and attention he was getting from his girl behind closed doors.

"And you?" Finnick asks, raising an eyebrow, looking up at Peeta from over his shoulder.

Peeta just smirks.

...

He tells his brothers next.

They are sitting in his room one night after dinner, one of the last nights they have in Panem, when Peeta drops the news, making the entire room fall quiet as his words sink in.

He expected some big celebration or relentless teasing but he got none of that.

Just a pat on the back from Wheaton and a lecture from Rye about being safe.

"We are being safe," Peeta mumbles, not wanting the process of applying a condom to be relayed to him again. The first time had been torture enough and so far, Peeta was having no trouble.

Wheaton goes to his night stand, his fingers messing with the foil packets the two had bought him for Christmas, his eyes going wide when he only counts forty-seven in the box. "How much sex are you having?" He screams so loud Peeta is worried his mother will come barreling into his room at any moment. When a few moments have passed and there is no pounding on the locked door, Peeta finally answers.

"We've only had sex four times," he tells his brothers. "I gave her half so that if we were at her house and we were feeling like..." He uses hand motions to make the boys understand because he knows he'll break into a rash if he says the word "sex" one more time.

"How good is it?" Rye asks, winking to his little brother who has suddenly become a man before his very eyes.

"It's the most wonderful thing in the world."

...

When New Years rolls around, he opts to skip out on Marvels house, something that is becoming a tradition for everyone. Instead, he decides too snuggle up with Katniss on the couch at his house, his brothers out with their friends and his parents out with theirs.

Peeta managed to sneak some of his parents champagne, and the two were having a great time, watching the festivities in New York take place and watching bad television. It was the perfect holiday.

"I must say, this is a much better party," Katniss smiles, her lips falling atop Peetas, no longer hungry for the cheese and crackers the Mellarks had provided.

"I agree," he whispers, moving over her to have a better angle. He knew what this would inevitably lead too, already taking the time to put a condom under the couch.

Peeta enters the new year inside of Katniss and he can't think of anything better.

...

"So what do you do on these double date things?" Finnick asks, his eyes volleying between Katniss and Peeta who sit in the booth opposite himself and Annie. Finnick finally had the nerve to ask her on an official date, hounding Peeta and Katniss into making it a double date to avoid awkward moments.

But an hour into this and every single minute of it had been filled with awkward moments.

Peeta might have made a run for it if it wasn't for the thick snow that was falling by the buckets, the end of January pulling near and with it, all of winters wonders. He had never liked the snow but Katniss loved it. They had spent the entire day wrestling in it, starting snow ball fights with one another until Peetas mother insisted they come back inside before they caught a cold. Peeta would never do something so childish alone, but with Katniss it was something completely different.

"We talk, eat, go see a movie usually," Katniss says, stirring the hot tea she'd purchased. Peeta ordered one too; no sugar of course.

"Do you guys want to go see a movie? It isn't too late," Peeta offers, reading the worried looks Finnick gives him. Annie is unresponsive, her eyes trained on the steaming mug of hot chocolate placed before her. She hadn't said a word all night, just a simple greeting.

"That sounds fun, right Annie?" Finnick asks, nudging her with her shoulder, demanding her attention. She perks up at the words, sending Finnick a quiet smile.

"Can we eat first? I'm starving," she whispers, her eyes already trailing over the menu the waitress had set before the four of them when they'd arrived.

They all nod, the effects of hunger hitting them too. The date would be a complete bust if no one ate, after all.

They all talk amongst themselves, Peeta whispering in Katnisses ear most of the night. Peetas eyes find Finnick's, the exasperated look in them undeniable. Annie was actually leaning away from him, keeping to herself or attending to her phone. Peeta wonders if something had transpired in the car on their way here, something he did not hear, but everything seemed fine. But then again, Annie was Annie and things of this nature happened at time. Peeta had tried to warn Finnick.

"Can you two get a room," Finnick seethes, throwing a handful of his french fries at the happy couple that sits before him.

"I wish," Peeta smirks, leaning in to leave an open mouthed kiss on the hollow of Katnisses throat. She laughs, pushing him away with comical effort before turning towards Annie who was now spinning a piece of red hair around her finger.

"Annie, I have to go to the bathroom. Do you want to go with me?"

Annie nods and the two wander away, leaving the boys alone at the table for a moment.

"What the fuck is wrong with her, dude," Finnick asks, leaning forward, his face uncomfortably close to Peetas. "She was totally giving me 'I want the dick vibes' in the car and now she won't even look at me. It also doesn't help that you and Katniss can't keep your hands off of each other."

"_I want the dick vibes?_" Peeta remarks sarcastically, shaking his head at his friend. "Are those even a thing?"

"Yeah, douchebag. You wouldn't know because you've never got them," Finnick replies.

"Oh, believe me Finnick, I've gotten them. I've gotten a lot more than you have."

Finnick scoffs, pouting in the booth as the waitress comes to bring by the checks. There both paid for when the girls return what feels like hours later.

They all decide to skip the movie and just head home.

...

"Hey, Mr. Mellark I've been looking all over for you," Clove says, her hips swaying as she moves near him, her dark ponytail bouncing with each step she takes. Peeta notes she isn't wearing enough clothes, not to be comfortable in the February cold they were having to bear this winter. He tells her so. "How sweet of you to be concerned about me Peeta. But that's what heater are for, no?"

"Still. You might want to bring a jacket to class, just to be safe," he replies, burying his nose in the text book they were supposed to be studying, his eyes moving about the classroom. No one seems to be paying the two any mind.

Clove curls a finger around Peetas jaw, directing his attention back to her painted face. She's plastered on a smile, one that shows all the pearly white teeth she'd spent years perfecting. The only thing Peeta can think of is how much more beautiful Katniss is than this. "We should hang out some time, don't you think?"

Peeta shakes his head. "My girlfriend wouldn't like that very much."

"Oh, Katniss?" Clove asks, mocking his tone of voice, raising an eyebrow like she hadn't known. They had been dating for nearly a year. Everyone knew. "She won't have to know a thing."

He pushes her hands away, placing them back at her sides and far away from him, the whole direction the conversation is taking making him grow anxious and uncomfortable. "Clove, I think you have the wrong idea of the kind of guy I am."

"Please, Peeta. Don't be so self righteous. I just think we could go well together," she says.

"I have a girlfriend, Clove," he answers.

"Not for long," she mumbles under her breath, turning on her heel to walk away. Peeta catches her hand before she has the chance.

"What do you mean?"

"Go ask her what she's doing after school today."

...

It takes Peeta no time at all to find Katniss, deep in conversation with Madge. He doesn't apologize as he pulls on her hand with enough force to lift her, tugging her into the dark shadows of the hallway, away from curious eyes.

"Whoa, Peeta. Slow down," she says, pulling her arm away from his hold, crossing her arms over her chest defensively.

"What are you doing after school today?" He rushes out, his eyebrows knitting together in confusion, his throat tightening as he waits for her answer.

Her eyes widen, her tongue coming from her mouth to wet her lips. Normally, this action would turn Peeta on but now, it worried him. Katniss swallows a few times, her throat bobbing under Peetas gaze.

"What do you mean?" She finally says, her eyes directed on the tiled floor, refusing to look at Peetas face.

"Clove told me I should ask you what you were doing after school," he tells her.

"Why were you talking to Clove?"

"Why won't you tell me what you're doing after school?"

"Why am I-"

"I didn't know we were the couple that kept things from each other, Katniss," he interjects, his eyes falling on the freshman that managed to catch a glimpse at them. He scurries off.

The guilt in her eyes is undeniable and as she runs a finger through her hair, the words begin tumbling out. Word vomit almost. "I got a job. A job at the Hawthorne's car dealership and before you say anything, you have to understand that I really need this job and they were wiling to hire me a few weeks before I turned sixteen because they know how dire this money is for me and my family. Please don't be mad that I didn't tell you. I just didn't want you too over react."

Peeta doesn't have time to over react because he is having a hard time processing the words the small girl before him says. "Why didn't you tell me you needed money?" Peeta finally asks when all his thoughts are in order. "I could've-"

"You could've what, Peeta? Paid my phone bill," Katniss asks in disbelief, throwing her hands in the air in exasperation.

Peeta says nothing but the silence is all she needs to continue.

"The last thing I need is for you to always be taking care of me, okay? I can take care of myself, I can take care of my family, and I don't need anyones help to do it. You don't understand how hard it can be too look at all the things you have and know, that never in a million years, will life ever be handed to me the way it is handed to you," she spits, her face red with anger.

"You think things are handed to me, Katniss?"

"Oh, I know they are," she retorts, rolling her eyes in his general direction.

"Well if you ever had a problem with that, you've never said anything until now," Peeta argues.

"I've never had too," she says. "How could I expect you too understand me having this job? Yeah, Gale helped me out a little, he's just being a good friend. He can be a little more understanding about things like this than you can."

Being compared to Gale does something to Peeta, something that makes him want to rip the hair out of his head and scream for hours at the top of his lungs. He tries to convince himself she is just angry, she doesn't mean these things. "A friend?"

"Yeah, Peeta, a friend," Katniss whispers. "I'm not a Mellark. I don't have the world in the palm of my hand," she replies, retorting back to the comment Cato made.

Peeta rolls his eyes at such a ridiculous assumption. "You know how things are with my family, Katniss. How dare you say that."

"I don't expect you too understand."

"No, of course not, but Gale understands it all, no?"

Katniss slams the door to the stairwell on her way out.

...

Peeta has the urge to drive by the car dealership after football practice but Finnick convinces him it's not a good idea. He doesn't have much room to argue being Finnick is his ride home.

"You don't want to be that kind of boyfriend," Marvel tells him from the backseat, leaning his head against the passenger seat.

"I didn't realize I would ever _have_ to be that boyfriend," Peeta says, clawing at his scalp in frustration.

"Man, calm down. It might not even be anything to worry about," Thresh agrees, prying Peetas greedy fingers away from his head. "Katniss is a nice girl. You should trust her."

"It's not her I don't trust, it's him," Peeta seethes. It would always be Gale Hawthorne, the center of his nerves as long as Katniss was around.

"Peeta, you're something short of a greek goddess. That girl would have to be handicapped to break up with you."

...

There is no resolve the following day at school, Katniss to stubborn to apologize and Peeta to angry to even think about it.

"Why don't you talk to her. No one said you had to apologize," Delly offers that day at lunch, sensing the tension as she sat between the two.

Peeta doesn't talk to her and she doesn't talk to him.

When she gets into Gale Hawthornes car when the school bell rings, Peeta doesn't flinch when his fist comes in contact with a stop sign.

...

It's the third day of them not talking that Peeta begins to worry.

Valentines Day is the following day, the first time in his fifteen years of life that he's been remotely interested in the holiday. He had booked reservations at a nice restaurant by the lake, one he'd never taken her to because he was saving it for something special. When he'd told her, she'd been excited and now he wondered if that was even the plan.

When she doesn't show up for school that day, he goes to her house promptly when school ends, not wasting even a moment to mutter out an excuse to his friends.

When he gets there, it's Prim who answers the door, her hair in a loose ponytail, one of the bows he'd purchased for her hanging on the elastic. She greets him warmly, inviting him in. He knows he will not get the same response from Katniss.

Peeta knocks on her closed door, taking a moment to listen for any resistance before shoving his way inside. He sees Katniss, bundled beneath a heap of blankets, her back turned towards him, what looks like untouched breakfast on the table beside her. Had she not eaten all day?

"Katniss," he says, moving slowly towards her. The bed dips as he lays on it, his body cradling hers. The last time they'd been in this position, they were both still naked.

She doesn't respond to his calls, just stiffens in his arms and he can hear her sniffle now and again. "Are you hurt?" He asks, his eyes racking over her body. She shakes her head. "What's wrong Katniss? If this is about me I'm-"

"It's not about you, Peeta," she interrupts, smearing away the tears that are coming down in long streaks.

"Then what is it?" Peeta questions, his heart beating rapidly within his own chest. Was this the day she ended it all? He would have to return the chocolates and teddy bear he'd purchased last week...

"My father," she croaks, a sob catching in her throat though she tries her best to disguise the sound, muffling it with the sleeve of the hoodie she wore.

Peeta couldn't see her eyes but he knew she was in pain, pain he couldn't understand because he had never been in the position she had been in. Maybe she was right. How could she expect Peeta to understand when, virtually, they lived in two different worlds? Hers with nothing but loss and heartache. His with nothing but praise and fulfillment. How did they get here?

"What about him?" Peeta asks, his arms tightening around her to pull her close. She stands away for a minute but then she sinks into his hold, kissing the hands that tie at her front.

"It's his birthday," she says. "He would've been forty-six years old today. Isn't that crazy?"

"My parents still have a good ten years on him," Peeta jokes, feeling her smile as he says the words. "Did you tell him happy birthday?"

She shakes her head. "No but my mother ran from the house this morning before the sun rose. I don't think she can handle..."

"Don't think she can handle what?"

"I don't think she can handle being around me. I remind her too much of him. I am too much of everything he was, you know?" Peeta didn't know. Physically, he supposed. She looked nothing like Prim and Mrs. Everdeen. He could only assume she looked like her father.

"Have you told her this?" Peeta asks, moving her hair over her shoulder, getting a clearer view of her pale face through the little light that illuminates from the window.

"No. She's here for Prim. What more can I really ask of her?"

"But someone needs to be here for you," Peeta whispers, placing a soft kiss on her exposed cheek, tasting the salty tears as they fall from her eyes. "I'm here for you."

"I know, Peeta. I'm so sorry. I was being so stupid the other day. I've just been more and more stressed with the date getting nearer and...and we did really need money for the phone bill but I did not mean to lash out on you," she apologizes, turning in his arms, tucking her face into the crook of his neck like she was hiding. Maybe she was.

"You don't have to apologize. I was being irrational," Peeta says.

"You were being a jealous boyfriend," Katniss agrees.

"Yeah. I guess it'll always be that way."

...

They go to dinner at the restaurant Peeta had reserved, eating the finest foods either of them had ever tasted.

Katniss offers to pick up the tab but Peeta declines.

She gives him a blow job in the basement of his house in return.

...

Their 9 month anniversary happens to fall on Peetas birthday.

When he wakes that morning, Katniss is downstairs, a plate of pancakes in her hand, a gift sitting on the granite counter top. His father is sitting at the table, Prim and Finnick too but his mother is no where to be found. Probably sulking in her room until Katniss leaves.

"Happy birthday, Peeta," she smiles, running to him and throwing her arms around his neck. For a moment, he's oblivious to the audience he has, sitting at his kitchen table. When he pulls away, she places a sweet kiss atop his cheek.

"You didn't have to do this," he tells her though he's glad she did.

His breakfast is nice, all his favorite people in one room, laughing and joking at his expense but he wouldn't have it any other way.

Mr. Mellark takes him to the DPS to get his license right after school. He delights Katniss by arriving at her house two hours later with a license in hand and the brand new Jeep his parents purchase for him.

"Take me somewhere," she says, toeing on the boots that sit by the front door, running at full force into Peetas warm car. "It already smells like you."

Peeta smiles. "What do I smell like?"

"Like cinnamon and raisins and everything I love!" She sings, throwing her hands in the air. The breeze is nice, the spring air trickling in though Peeta worries about Katniss without a jacket.

"Where do you want to go?" Peeta asks, putting the car into drive and waving at young Primrose who stands a the front window, waving excitedly at the two as the car makes it's way up the main street.

"Somewhere I can make love to you."

...

That somewhere ends up being Marvels lake house about ten minutes outside of town. He shoots Marvel a quick text, asking him for the passcode to the gate. He gets the code along with a long list of rules such as "no birthday sex on my couch". That one will just have to be broken.

Ten minutes later, all clothes have been shed and Peeta stares up at Katnisses naked body as she swivels her hips on his member, using her legs to propel herself up and down his manhood. He'd talked her out of the blow job she'd wanted to give him in the car, knowing there is no way he could've survived the night if that happened.

"Katniss, you feel so fucking good," he moans, placing his hands on her hips to help her set the tempo. She nods enthusiastically, moaning loudly as she does so. She'd long gotten past the pain and Peeta finds sex much more enjoyable when Katniss isn't crying.

"Is this what you wanted, birthday boy?" She whispers into his ear, using the tip of her tongue to leave a trail of saliva on jaw, nipping at the skin as Peetas mouth fights to find her own.

"No. I just wanted to be with you. This is just a bonus," he says, his head falling back and eyes falling shut. He knows the end is coming and he only hopes she reaches it before he does.

"Well this is what I want," she says, punctuating her words with a thrust. Peeta is sure this will be the end of him. He wouldn't mind dying now, dying with Katniss Everdeen riding him seemed like the perfect way to go. "I wanted to cook you breakfast naked but I don't think your parents would like me very much."

The image of her naked body with only the green apron she had on this morning is his undoing and he groans into the crook of her neck. He doesn't stop thrusting until he feels her come five seconds later.

"Happy birthday baby," she says breathlessly.

...

"How good was the birthday sex?" Finnick asks the next day, xbox controller in hand as he, yet again, gets blown to pieces by mutant rats.

"I don't know what you're talking about," Peeta says but the smile on his face says something different.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," he says, his fingers pausing the game. "Do you think Annie likes me?"

Peeta shrugs. "I don't think she would be spending so much time with you if she didn't."

...

Peeta goes by the car dealership two Saturdays later, surprising her with lunch from her favorite sandwich shop in town. Gale is not working today, he'd made sure of it before he arrived. He didn't need there to be any tension and he didn't want to make Katniss uncomfortable.

As much as he hated it, the two were friends. On days when Peeta was not there, he'd heard a wide range of stories about her being friendly with Gale Hawthorne. Finnick assured him, from what he saw, it was nothing romantic. But the thought of him being around still unnerved Peeta. He tries to keep the comments to himself but it's becoming more and more difficult. Katniss assures him he's being ridiculous. His friends assure him he isn't worried enough.

"We trust each other," he tells them. They leave him alone after that. Katniss could very well have her own reservations about Delly Cartwright and if she does, she keeps them to herself. So Peeta has begun to keep them to himself in hopes of avoiding any further tension.

She's working in a little back office when he arrives, her shoulder keeping the receiver in place, her smile brightening as Peeta walks in quietly. She holds up a finger, ending the phone call with whoever was on the other line. "Hard at work?" Peeta jokes, unwrapping the sandwiches he'd bought them.

"You know it," she says. "Peeta, you know a way to a girls heart."

"What can I say? I try," he shrugs.

"So, my birthday is coming up," Katniss says after a long while, sucking a bit of mustard from her thumb. "And I decided all I want from you is a batch of cheese buns."

Peeta laughs. "I did that last year. So unoriginal."

"I didn't get you anything for your birthday," she points out.

"Well, you kinda did so I mean," Peeta mumbles, his cheeks burning at the memory.

"Cheese buns or we're done," Katniss announces.

"You run a hard bargain, Ms. Everdeen."

"And don't you forget it."

...

The night before her birthday, he does in fact make her three dozen cheese buns like he had the year before, burying the charm bracelet he'd purchased for her in the one red velvet cupcake he'd made.

He should be studying for the finals he has tomorrow, but somehow making Katniss happy trumps all else.

"You're wasting your time with this boy," his mother tells him for the tenth time that night, shaking her head in disgust at the boy hard at work, bent over his creations.

"She didn't ask for anything, mom. I'm just being a good boyfriend," Peeta tells her.

"I'm telling you, you would just be better off with Delly," she preaches. "Her mother is always bragging in bridge club about-"

Peeta drowns his mother out for the rest of the night.

...

After Katniss finishes her fourth cheese bun, she then decides she's ready to swim, unwrapping the towel from around her slender body and running to the edge of the pool, screaming a warning to those who splash around, before plunging into the water. Peeta laughs, watching her dark hair fall in a halo around her, her grey eyes misty from the chlorine in the pool water.

"Peeta, you gonna get in or just sit there?" Marvel screams, being the only person in the hot tub. Peeta finds it ridiculous, almost. It was May, nearly ninety degrees outside. The hot tub didn't seem like fun.

"Yeah, Peeta. Jump in," Katniss says, her arms swinging rapidly as Thresh hoists her up into the air.

Peeta doesn't waist another moment, front flipping into the ice cold water, gritting his teeth as he reemerges at the surface. "It's too cold," he tells Katniss who locks her arms around his neck, giving him a small peck before moving away. They know Mrs. Mellark is keeping a close eye on the situation.

"I'll warm you up later then," Katniss purrs in his ear, making his cock stiffen. "I can see you like that idea."

"Katniss," he warns, swimming backwards and away from her body. There are too many eyes on them, too many of their close friends in this pool.

Katniss giggles and disappears below the water.

...

The next time the two are alone is the first day of summer.

The moment they were let out of school, the two of them high tailed it from the parking lot, making it to the Mellarks in record time. His parents weren't home, both still at the bakery being it was only a little past lunch.

They had hours Peeta realizes as he toes his shoes off, discarding his shirt as soon as the door gives a soft click. When his eyes find Katniss she's done the same, her hands moving behind her to unlatch her bra. He'd seen her naked plenty of times but her body was something that never failed to make him hard.

"Where to?" She asks, her breasts hanging in his face as she turns to face him, three steps higher than where he stood. He can't stop himself and takes one into his mouth, sucking on the dark puckered nipple until she sings. "Peeta, not here."

"Why not?" He asks, turned on by the idea of claiming her as his own on these very steps. He would never be able to look at them the same.

"Anyone could walk in," she gasps. She was right, of course. Just because his parents weren't supposed to be home for hours didn't mean they'd be gone the whole time. So he reluctantly releases her from his mouth, grabbing ahold of the lacy pink bra she wore in one hand, grabbing her other and pulling her up the stairs into his room.

"I've been waiting for this for a while," Katniss tells him, focusing her attention on his tricky belt buckle, ripping the pants down his legs as soon as she has it undone. "I haven't had you in weeks."

"More like a week," Peeta confirms, moaning as her small hand begins to pump his length, his teeth worrying his bottom lip until he can taste blood. "Katniss, stop. I'm not ready yet."

Katniss stands, peeling the dark wash jeans from her legs, taking her panties as well. She lies back on his bed, her head hoisted on the pillows his mother fluffed this morning, her legs falling open to his gaze as he watches her. Peeta was in complete awe of this women.

"I'm getting lonely here," she whispers, moving her hands to caress her breasts.

Peeta wastes no time jumping to her attention, his hand taking over the job and his other burying itself between her legs, two fingers slipping inside of her.

"You're so wet," he tells her. "I don't even know how it's possible."

Katniss smirks. "You know what you're doing," she compliments, moaning as his thumb joins in the mix, flicking the precious nerve at the apex of her thighs, not stopping until she's withering beneath him, chanting his name as she falls from her high. "Now I need you inside me."

Peeta reaches over to the bed side table, feeling for a condom. One everything is good to go, he eases inside her, giving her a moment to adjust to the feeling before starting to move, his eyes falling shut as he fills her to the brink, her moans the only sound in the room as he thrusts with purpose.

Sex was the best thing that ever happened to me. No, Katniss Everdeen was the best thing that ever happened to him. He would not want to do this with anyone else. As far as he was concerned, he would never do this with anyone else. She was it. She was all he wanted forever and ever and ever...

"Like that," Katniss moans, moving her hand down to rub her own clit. Peeta would offer to do it for her but the visual was more than enough to finish him. He knew this would be over in a few minutes. "Peeta, I'm coming," she says, her back arching as her walls tighten around his throbbing cock, giving him two more thrusts before, he too, succumbs to his orgasm.

He waits a moment, waits until she stops moaning and his head stops spinning, before pulling out, walking to the bathroom to dispose to the condom and then cradling her in his arms, kissing the back of her neck which is salty with sweat. He didn't care.

"Hey Peeta," she says after awhile, her hands moving to tangle in his hair.

"Yeah?" He asks, his eyes droopy with sleep.

"I love you."

* * *

Thank you all for the positive responses on this story. If you have any ideas, please PM me and let me know. Thanks again!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

"_Chasing visions of our futures"_

_Junior Year: 16-17_

The recruiters in the stands were hard to miss, all sitting in a single file row, each with the newest iPad in hand, tapping away on the screen, their eyes only lifting for a fraction of a second before going back down. Peeta had been told not to look at them, act above it all and pretend they were not even here but he was finding it impossible. Every time he snapped the ball to Finnick or ran a route with Marvel, his eyes automatically shifted to the nicely dressed men.

He was playing well, at least. The season would be starting next week and the local papers had already began running pieces on him, calling him "The Next Big Thing". He was getting a lot of praise and a lot of people were starting to notice. His brothers did well their freshman season at their colleges and Peeta was expected to do the same, nothing less.

Katniss joked with him, always telling him he would be the guy that came back to his hometown and did inspirational speaking to all the kids. "You're a cliche straight out of Friday Night Lights," she jokes. "Minus the whole Jason Street aspect."

Thinking of her makes this all a bit easier in a way, something to get his mind off the fact his future, his future which seemed so far away just a month ago, is starting to catch up with him. He had two years left here, two years left to leave an impression and start the life that was made for him, the stone path that had been carved long before he was even conceived. His parents had always wished their last child would be a girl but now, I can't imagine them being to regretful of having Peeta. At least not Mr. Mellark. He would bring something completely new to the family name.

"Bring it in!" Coach Abernathy yells, clapping his hands in an effort to get the boys pumped, excited. It was a hard task being that he rarely felt the excitement himself but he tried his hardest and Peeta couldn't fault him too much for that. As much of a drunk as the old coach was, Peeta found some genuine wisdom within his toxic mind. "Tomorrow is the first day of school which means what, Fitzpatrick?"

The red headed managers eyes go wide, using his hat in an attempt to shield his eyes from the bigger boys. Someone makes a comment, some joke about being a leprechaun, one that Peeta doesn't find the least bit funny. "Um, seven am sharp, Coach."

"You hear that boys? Seven. Am. Sharp," he says, punctuating each word with a poke of his finger into Finnicks pads. "Odiar, you get here at six forty-five because I don't trust your time management."

Finnick shrugs his shoulders, knowing the man has a point. Peeta is sure he'll be spending the early hours of the morning in Annies bed, probably sneaking out just before her parents wake for work. He smirks at his friend who has a knowing look in his eye. "Sure, Coach."

The boys are dismissed, all but Peeta who is taken to the side, sat down where the sun didn't shine, Coach Abernathy chewing religiously on the piece of spearmint gum in his mouth. His eyes shift up the recruiters, all who stand on attention. "Don't talk to any of them, you hear?" He says, his spit trickling onto Peetas face as he says the words. "Don't go do something stupid now."

Peeta nods. "I know the rules sir."

"Tell Ms. Everdeen I say hello, okay?"

...

Katniss is stretched out across his bed, her phone in her hands as she taps out a reply to one of her friends, smiling at something funny being said and occasionally giggling quietly. Peeta watches her from his bean bag, tossing a football with one hand, his xbox controller in the other as he fights to beat Finnick in the new Madden game his parents had purchased him.

"You should probably give up now," Finnick warns, making a fifty yard pass that Peeta finds unrealistic. "Yeah. Game over. I'll take that fifty bucks now."

"I did not bet you fifty bucks, asswipe," Peeta replies, pushing his friend away from him as his hands reach greedily into his pocket.

"Don't talk that way in front of the beautiful women who sleeps in your bed," Finnick jokes, making his way over to Katniss who is now paying full attention, stiffening as Finnicks arms wind around her, his nose burying in her hair. "You smell like summertime."

"You're scaring me, Finn," Katniss says, squirming away from his body and snuggling next to Peeta whose face is now a bizarre shade of red. Katniss reaches her hand up, finding the golden stubble that grows along his chin. "I like this," she whispers, moving her mouth up to trail over the patch.

Finnick groans in disgust, swinging his legs off the bed. "Well I guess this is my introduction to leave. Thank you for the time and hospitality," he says, waving once to the two of them before closing the door with a soft click. Katniss continues her assault on his neck until the sound of the engine is long gone in the distance.

Peeta cranes his neck to get better access of her lips, moving his hands down her side in order to slide the jean cut-offs she has on down her legs, wanting so badly to be with her in this moment. He had found an effective way of relieving all the stress he felt was excessive amount of sex and Katniss was usually more than willing to participate. But not today.

She pushes his face away, sitting up on his bed and padding off the bathroom, grabbing her discarded shoes and braiding the pieces of hair she had let free in the few hours she had been at Peetas. "Where are you going?" Peeta pouts, supporting his head with one arm as he watches her dress in the complete outfit she came in, using the bit of concealer she owns to hide the red marks on her neck Peeta had left earlier in the week.

"I have to go home," she tells him, her eyes meeting his in the mirror. "Prim gets back from camp today and the last thing I want is for her to come home to an empty house."

"Your mother won't be there?" Peeta asks. Katniss scoffs.

Prim had been away at camp for almost a month, spending her days in a spot by the lake. She was almost thirteen now and no longer wanted to spend her summers with her sister who had become drastically uncool in the year and a half Peeta had known the girls. She was in 7th grade and, suddenly, new person. She was blossoming into a young lady and Peeta couldn't imagine who would greet him at the door once she returned home.

Selfishly, Peeta had liked spending the days with Katniss, just Katniss. But he knew how much she was missing her sister and the joy Prim brought to her was something he would never want to see disappear.

"How about a welcome home party at mini golf tonight then? Finnick can bring his siblings and Annie. I'll be there and you," Peeta suggests, coming to stand behind her as his arms circle her wrists, his lips pressing to her cheek.

"We have school tomorrow, Peeta. I need to try and get her to sleep," Katniss argues, rolling her eyes in the mirror and going back to the previous task of, for the twentieth time, attempting to rebraid her hair.

"Let the girl have some fun! She doesn't have to go to school until eight now," he says, moving to sit on the counter top beside her, watching the resolve play on her face. "She's a big girl and we don't have to stay out late."

"You really want to hang out with Prim this badly, huh?" Katniss jokes, giving him a sweet smile as her fingers work in his hair, pulling on the soft curls that unroll on her finger tips. Peeta nods his head. "Fine. I'll ask her when I get home and we'll see what she says. No funny business either, Peeta!"

He holds his hands up mockingly. "All good family fun, my lady. I promise you."

She winks and disappears out of the door.

...

"How the hell did I let you talk me into this?" Finnick mumbles, standing next to Peeta, his weight being supported by the metal golf club.

It turned out their double date plus siblings had turned into Katniss and Annie and the boys and the kids. The girls had gone of long ago, claiming to hungry or thirsty or blurting out some bullshit excuse. So now Finnick and Peeta were left in charge of three rowdy preteens who were having the time of their lives.

Finnicks brother was making it no secret when hitting on Prim, touching her elbow and, one time, even playing with the tip of her pony tail. Peeta had nearly broken his arm but Finnick convinced him the kid had nothing but good intentions. "Calm down, Poppa Bear. He's only working his Odiar charm," he says, his eyes locked on the pigeons flying above.

"That's what I'm afraid of," Peeta mumbles. "I thought this was supposed to be a double date kind of thing."

"I know I didn't realize we'd be baby sitting on our last night of freedom."

Peeta just shrugs.

...

He drops the girls off some time later, around ten thirty and when he pulls into the driveway, Ms. Everdeens Honda is still missing from it's regular spot, only the Camry Katniss got for her sixteenth birthday lying on the gravel drive way.

"Are you going to be okay alone?" Peeta asks, his eyes darting back over his shoulder to Prim who is fast asleep, her head hanging in a way that will leave her with a crick in the morning.

"Well be okay, Peeta. I don't know how we managed without you," Katniss replies. "I would like some help carrying her inside though, if you don't mind."

He doesn't and scoops Prim into his arms without another word, her arms going around his neck as she wakes, just for a minute. Looking down at her face, this is the Prim he remembers meeting at the bakery with a white dress and pigtails.

Padding softly down the hallway, Peeta knocks on the door frame of Katnisses bedroom. She's changed, no longer in the skirt she wore but the night assemble she wore most nights. The little pink shorts that left nothing to the imagination and the tight white tank top that was two sizes to small. "Are you trying to tease me?" Peeta jokes, sitting on her bed as she flutters around the room, her feet not making any sound as he moves. Hunters tread she always says.

"Nope, I'm trying to go to bed," she says, lying on her stomach next to him. "I'm going to miss this."

"You won't have to give it up," he promises, kissing her hair.

"I just know how busy you get during football season. And it's you're big year. I don't want to distract you from that," she replies honestly.

"Hey," he says, forcing her to look up at him with hooded eyes. "It wouldn't mean a thing without you."

"I love you so much."

"I love you so much more."

...

Peeta gets home that night a little past twelve, exhausted from the grueling hours at football practice and the night spent with Katniss. He expects the house to be asleep, his brothers back off to college and his parents on baker hours. But when he turns the jeep into the driveway, the kitchen light is still on, either meaning they have an intruder or his mother can't sleep. From the smells wafting from the kitchen, it's the second.

He doesn't try to sneak up the stairs, knowing it's no use.

"Hey mom, I'm home," Peeta calls, kicking off the worn down converse he wears and taking the trip up the stairs to his room. His eyes droop and he knows as soon as his head hits the pillow, he will be gone.

"Peeta, come here," his mother calls from the kitchen, her voice hushed but intense.

With a slight groan, he turns on his heel, walking sluggishly down the hall to his own busy kitchen, his mother already in the silk blue robe she wears to bed, her hair in rollers. Without the slightest bit of make-up, her appearance was almost frightening. Peeta tries to hide his grimace the best he can.

"Where have you been?" Mrs. Mellark asks, her hands busying themselves in rolling the thin piece of dough on the marble countertop. "It's midnight and you have school tomorrow. You know it is not acceptable to be out this late."

"I know but Prim just got back from camp and I thought it would be fun to go play mini golf," he tells her honestly. "I figured it would be a nice, wholesome way to end the summer."

"_Nice, wholesome way to end the summer,"_ she says, mocking Peeta. "Oh, Peeta. When will you stop being so blind as to see that girl is nothing but trouble for you. Do you think she cares about the hours of sleep you're getting? Or should I say the hours of sleep you're not getting?"

"She's not trouble," he says calmly. "Quite the opposite actually. And what do the hours of sleep I get have to do with anything? That has nothing to do with her."

"Oh Peeta," she whispers below her breath. "Do not make the same mistakes your father did."

"That's what I'm trying not to do," Peeta mumbles below his breath, grabbing ahold of the car keys sitting on the counter and turning his back to his mother.

"How dare you walk away from me! Get back here this instant, Peeta," she fumes, grabbing ahold of the cotton green t-shirt he wears. The sound of the seam ripping apart is loud, startling and Peeta stares down at the ruins.

"Dammit mom," Peeta curses, shrugging the piece of fabric off, throwing it into the trash. "Katniss got me that for our one year anniversary."

"Oh, your one year anniversary? One whole year together and she couldn't get you anything better than a flimsy green shirt from Walmart?" With a roll of her eyes, she focuses one again on the dough that sits before them. "And you will never curse at me again, Peeta Mellark, is that understood?"

Peeta wonders what went wrong within his mothers life to make her this way. His father had done all he could for her, provide her a home, provide her three healthy children, buy her anything she desired without thinking twice about it. They made a good living, lived the way most people dreamed of but that was not good enough for Mrs. Mellark and Peeta really wondered why. It would be more than enough for Katniss.

"You were supposed to be a girl," she'll sometimes mumble under her breath, storming around the bakery like a mad women when something ticks her off. His father had seemed to get over the fact that they did not receive the blonde haired, blue eyed baby girl they were hoping for. Why his mother couldn't, he didn't know.

"I don't know what you're so angry for," Peeta tells her, placing his hand on the countertop. "She's a great girl if you'd get to know her. Dad loves her and Rye and Wheaton-"

"Your father and brothers are oblivious to the way of women. I, on the other hand, am not. I wish you could see I am only trying to advise you too make the correct decisions and not fall down the same rabbit hole your father did," she says.

"The same rabbit hole? And what was that mistake? Marrying you?"

The silence is loud. Peeta had never said such things to his mother, at least not when she was in hearing distance but even now, he finds it hard to feel bad about what he's just said or the look of defeat that's quickly replaced with anger.

The rolling pin she was using falls atop Peetas clenched fingers before he can blink, a deafening crunch falling over the whole house. Peeta reacts a moment to late, unable to block the swing of his mothers fist as it comes into contact with his cheek bone, hard enough to surely leave a mark in the morning.

Rarely did she hit the twins. Only poor, defenseless Peeta.

Mrs. Mellark says nothing, her breathing uneasy as she tries to regain her self control, before she does something to really injure her youngest son. By the shade of purple his clenched fist is turning, she knows she may have already done that.

Peetas father bounds down the stairs not a second later, panting and sweaty as he moves into the kitchen, his eyes on his wife and then to Peeta who can no longer meet his eyes. "What's happening?" He asks, his eyes falling from the rolling pin in Mrs. Mellarks grip to the red streak across Peetas face.

"Your son has quite the mouth Bannock, that's what," she spits, turning on her heel and stalking from the kitchen, the slamming of her bedroom door loud and over exaggerated. But Peeta would not have expected anything less from his mother. His mother only by name.

"You have to get some ice on that son," Mr. Mellark says, pulling a package of peas from the freezer, placing one of the swelling eye and the other on three of Peetas bruised fingers.

"I think their broken," Peeta mumbles after awhile, finding he is unable to flex the joints. His father looks sad, sad in a way Peeta cannot understand.

His father is a good, honest man. The type of man Peeta had always wished he would become. Why he spent his life with his mother, he did not understand. But there was a lot Peeta didn't understand about his own family and he realized that now. He doesn't wish his father to be unhappy or sad. He wants him to be happy but a life alone is a life Mr. Mellark would not live, Peeta knows that.

But he might like it if he gave it a shot.

...

Peetas fingers are, in fact, broken. Three of them, right at the joint and Peeta spends the following day in the emergency room, getting them reset and casted up.

He won't play on Friday or the Friday after that or the Friday after that. They'll have to call in the backups and all the enthusiastic college coaches who sat in on his practices will have to fly home now because there is nothing to watch.

Peeta tells all the doctors he fell going down the stairs, tried to catch himself and ended up breaking a few bones in the process. The story is believable enough but the black and blue bruise on his cheek is not.

He ignores all of Katnisses calls that day.

...

When Peeta returns to school the next day, all eyes are in him as he walks through the front doors of the school, the black cast he had put on not having the camouflage effect he'd hoped it would. Classes had been in session for approximately twenty-four hours and everyone knew of the horrors Mrs. Mellark had done to him. Of course, he would deny them all. He didn't want to draw any attention to his private life.

He doesn't see Katniss until second period, finding her sitting alone is a stairwell, writing quickly in the old leather journal she kept. The one she would never let Peeta read no matter how hard he begged. Grey meets blue when she looks up, the scowl on her face disappearing a moment later.

"Peeta," she whispers breathlessly, rising to her feet and wrapping her strong arms around his middle. He melts into the touch, her touch. The spark only she can give him igniting in the pit of his belly. "You should've called me."

He hadn't meant to ignore her. That was never the plan. He didn't want her too worry but he realized his silence did the opposite. He could see it in her eyes, in the way she assessed him up and down, her fingers grazing against the fading purple mark on his cheek. "You can't let her do this to you, Peeta."

Peeta pulls away from her, not wanting to fight, not now. She knew some about his mother, about the things she would say to the boys and the way she would act. But she didn't know it all and Peeta didn't want her too. Katniss was so troubled by her own past, what business did she have being worried about his as well?

"Does your father know?" She asks, cowering away from him.

"He knows," Peeta mumbles.

"Did he do anything?"

"Maybe in private. I don't know. He doesn't like to yell in front of us or anything so." Never in Peetas sixteen years of life had he heard his father yell at his mother. It was always the other way around.

"You have to talk to someone about this. She can't-"

"Katniss, don't. I know what you're trying to say and... don't," he replies simply, shaking his head. He watches the defeat play across her face, her eyes drooping. She grabs her things without another word, walking swiftly passed him.

...

"How long until you're back in business?" Coach Abernathy asks that afternoon in football.

The sun is blistering, the air hot and stuffy and Peeta has already successfully sweated through his "Panem Football" tee. He feels sorry for the boys, the ones running on the field in forty pounds of pads. Especially the big boys like Thresh who looks like he could drop any minute.

"Three weeks at the most. They weren't bad breaks but they wanted to cast them up, put them in place so I wouldn't be in pain for the rest of my life," Peeta answers.

"You have to be more careful, walking down those stairs and all." He says the words and Peeta knows he knows. He knows the real reason Peetas hand is plastered together.

...

Katniss comes by the house a few days later, a day when she knows Mrs. Mellark manages the bakery in the evening. She comes with a handful of papers, ones speaking about child abuse and how to stop it.

"This could really be helpful if you took it seriously," she tells him, flipping through the printed white pages, reading him a few sentence here and there.

He hears none of it, all his attention on the Xbox controller in his hand. Peeta finds it easier to ignore the things that bother him than dealing with them. And since it didn't look like Katniss was going to take her shirt off at any time, he would have to chose the Xbox.

"You're not even listening to me, are you?" She asks, her breathing uneven and her eyes flustered.

Peeta doesn't answer her. He knows he's being a jerk but what else is there to do. Not a lot of his brothers habits had rubbed off on him during the years they spent together under the same roof but the art of denial and avoidance was one he had picked up on quickly.

Katniss leaves without a goodbye. Peeta doesn't offer one either.

...

He gets the cast off two weeks later, after the back up quarterback has been successful in achieving nothing for the team; his team. They had lost the last three games, putting them in quite a tough position when it came to making the play offs. With Peeta back and ready, the whole town figured the problem would be solved.

But the first practice back and Peeta feels quite the opposite. His fingers have a hard time gripping the ball, the leather slipping from his hands and his joints aching as he tries to keep a tighter hold on them. By the end of the two hours, his hand has doubled in size and Peeta nearly cries when the trainer attempts to pry some life back in to them.

"Tough break, man," Marvel says, helping him secure the bag of ice around his knuckles. Marvel motions to the knee brace he wears now, a consequence for the consecutive ACL strains. "It could be worse."

Peeta shrugs. "Yeah it could be." But it felt pretty damn bad, not just physically. The calls from college coaches had stopped being made all at once, the phone finally falling silent after weeks. Peeta was out of commission and out of everyones mind. "I just have to find a way to get back out there."

Marvel nods his head, hoisting his backpack over his shoulder. "Don't worry, Mellark. Three weeks doesn't count you out." It almost seemed like it did.

Peeta is halfway to his car when Marvel calls out to him once more, waving his arms over his head trying to get the boys attention. "Would you call Katniss?"

"Why would I need to call Katniss?" Peeta asks. His first thought jumps to Prim, if she is okay. Surely, he would have known if something was wrong by now, no? What did Marvel know that he didn't?

"I don't know. She just seems pretty down lately, not talking as much as she used too. I don't know if you two are in a fight or anything but if you could both make up, I think life could be much better for all of us."

Were they in a fight? No. They hadn't fought, per se, but the tension between them was undeniable. Peeta knew it was his fault but the constant remainder Katniss gave him of his mother wasn't something he could handle. Not now. Not when so many other things needed his time and devotion.

Even thinking the words made him cringe. He was turning into the workaholic his own mother was, so consumed by the thoughts of his own future he was forgetting to enjoy the right now. But he was doing this for her. It was no longer just his future. It was their future and he was just trying to make it as bright as possible.

He tries not to worry too much about it, sending her a quick text to say he loves her before resting his eyes for the night.

...

"Do you even know what you're saying?" Katniss asks, eyeing him suspiciously as he tries to rephrase the question yet again. "You're telling me right now: I'd like to eat your cat."

Peeta arches an eyebrow. "Maybe that's what I meant to say."

"You can stop being so gross and start focusing on your damn spanish assignment," she scolds him. But she doesn't protest when his lips begin to move against the hollow of her throat, her eyes falling shut as he locates her pulse point which is beating rapidly against his tongue.

"The assignment can wait," Peeta mummers against her skin. "My girlfriend needs me to eat her cat now soooo..."

Katniss giggles as Peeta lies her on her back, his lips never leaving hers as he works the shirt off of her body. He's delighted to find she wears no bra underneath, her perky breasts standing at attention. Peeta doesn't hesitate before taking the bud between the teeth, biting softly until she moans, her hands going to tangle in Peetas hair.

As he works the other, his hands make quick work of the jean shorts she wears, nudging them down her hips until she is left in nothing but the light pink underwear she wears, the words 'Sunday' written across the top. Peeta can't help but let out a laugh, some how unaroused by the childish underwear she wears.

"It's laundry day," she explains, moving her hands to waistband to rid them from her body, kicking them to her ankles where Peeta removes them completely, tossing them across her room into a dark corner.

"You'd be sexy in a paper bag," Peeta assures her, leaving a trail of kisses across her stomach, his tongue dipping into her belly button. By the way she squirms, he knows she's growing sick of the teasing.

When he smells her arousal, he knows he, too, cannot wait another moment.

Peeta had found out in the middle of summer pleasuring her with his mouth was something he really enjoyed. The taste of her drove him wild and though it took her a little while to become open to the idea, she enjoyed it just as much as he did from the kicks and screams and pants he was always rewarded with. He would spend the rest of his life pleasuring her this way if that is all she wanted. He would have no complaints.

When his tongue licks up the length of her, she shakes uncontrollably, moaning loudly as her hips buck in time with this strokes. "Fuck, Peeta," she groans, her eyes squeezing shut as he nips at her swollen nub.

She comes three second later, shouting and cursing and Peeta hopes Ms. Everdeen is not here to hear the things her daughter says when she is not around. Thinking of Ms. Everdeen softens his straining erection some.

"Let me take care of you," Katniss groans, moving over to him on her hands and knees, crawling like a wild animal. She almost could be, her eyes dark and lustful, her hair wild.

As much as Peeta wants to feel her small hands wrapped tightly around his cock, the way he loves, he denies her, snapping the zipper on his jeans shut. "Tonight was about you," he tells her, lifting her sad eyes as he presses a kiss to the tip of her nose. She responds to it immediately, her lips connecting with his, her tangy flavor still on his tongue.

"Are you leaving?" Katniss asks, moving to fetch her discarded clothes. Peeta is disappointed when he no longer is rewarded with the sight of her naked body.

"I really should," he answers. "My mother don't really want me back too late tonight."

The mention of his mother really changes Katnisses mood, the scowl returning to her face as the orgasmic bliss falls away. "I don't want you going over there with that women," she whispers, crossing her arms over her chest as Peeta packages his books.

"Well where am I supposed to go, Katniss?" Peeta asks. He thought they had gotten over the conversation. He supposed they hadn't.

"You could stay here," she offers. From the way she tugs at her bottom lip he almost takes her up on the offer.

"Like you're mother would approve of that."

"She would if we-"

"If we told her, Katniss? I thought I asked you too drop it. Please drop it," he says harshly, not even flinching as her eyes widen under his hard stare, her hand going to hair to tangle in it like she did when she was nervous.

Katniss just nods her head, her eyes watering, unshed tears threatening to fall over. The last thing Peeta needs is to see her cry, to know he upset her. So he takes to strides to sit atop her bed, his lips going to her hair and his arms wrapping around her.

"I just want to protect you, Peeta," she tells him, her head resting against his chest. She listens to his heart. The steady beat of it. It's her new favorite sound.

Peeta says nothing because really, no one can.

...

Peeta begins to realize he's avoiding Katniss now in all aspects of the word.

Avoiding her phone calls, her texts. When he sees her silvery eyes in the hallway he ducks into a classroom, sometimes the bathroom. He turns fast on his heel when he sees their walking in the same direction and even their conversations in the car are tense and uninviting and overall, awkward.

When she asks him if he wants to come inside, he always says no, ducking out and telling her some bullshit excuse like he has homework or something. She knows he's lying. He can tell by the way her eyes dart around the car as if someones watching them or how she'll slam the door with a little more force than is really necessary.

When he gets a text from her telling him she doesn't need a ride in the morning, he knows she's really mad but he can't bring himself to say anything.

Never in a million years had he ever imagined he'd be dating someone as beautiful and smart and as caring as Katniss. Never in a million years would he have imagined treating any girl, especially her, this way. But he couldn't help himself.

She was always reminding Peeta of all the bad in his life. She cared, he knew that. But he had other things to worry about and his mother was the last of his worries. His fingers were healed, his mother kept her distance, and all was well in the Mellark home for now.

When Katniss could learn to drop the subject, maybe things could get back to normal.

...

"You're being a straight up dick," Cato tells him.

"When Cato tells you you're being a dick, that's when you know things are going bad," Marvel chimes in, finishing off the half of Peetas sandwich he hadn't planned on eating.

Katniss had long ago stopped sitting near him at lunch, sometimes not even bothering to show up. He doesn't know where she went but when he'd text her to ask, there was never a reply. She was getting just as fed up with his attitude as he was.

"Thanks for the support guys," Peeta mumbles, his eyes trained on the carefully painted wood markings on the dirty lunchroom table. "I knew I could count on you guys."

"We're you're best friends, Peeta. We're just trying to be honest with you," Thresh says, eyeing Johanna from across the lunchroom. Peeta rolls his eyes.

"It's just... I'm already so overwhelmed with having to carry the team on my fucking back and all Katniss wants to do is remind me of everything else I don't have time for," he rants, checking quickly over his shoulder to make sure she isn't around. If she actually heard him say the words, he would be in deep shit. Well deeper shit.

"All I'm saying is you've got a nice girlfriend who sucks your dick on a regular basis. Why try and mess that up?"

...

He finds Katniss at the end of the day, right before she heads off to work.

It's a Friday meaning there will be a game, a game in which she will be missing. But as she's pointed out many times, it's not as if Peeta looks for her in the crowd. "I'll be cheering for you from a far," she always says, waving her fists in the air.

She's sliding into her car when Peeta grabs ahold of her arm, loosening his grip when he feels her jump. "Sorry," he mumbles. "Can we talk for a minute, Katniss?"

"No, Peeta. I'm late," she says roughly, starting her car without sparing Peeta another glance. "Move away from my car Peeta. I know how important this game is to you."

"Katniss, what's wrong?" He asks, his hand the only thing not allowing her to leave, propping her door open as she stares up at him, her eyes hard. She looks almost identical to the quiet girl he met on the first day of school almost two years ago. My, how things have changed.

"Nothing, Peeta. Nothing is wrong," she grits, trying once again to close the door. She's unsuccessful.

"Talk to me," Peeta begs, not worrying about the stares their receiving from the person in the next car over.

"Oh talk to you?" Katniss remarks sarcastically, her eyes widening to twice their size. "Talk to you? You want me to talk to you? Isn't that ironic being you haven't said more than two words to me for two weeks. Now you want me to talk to you."

"Katniss, I've-"

"I don't want to fucking hear it Peeta," she curses, finally managing enough force to push Peetas hand away from her door. "I don't want to fucking hear it. If you want to be mad at me for caring about you, be my guest. I won't apologize for shit."

"Would you listen to me?" Peeta asks rather loudly, drawing even more attention to the scene at hand. Her anger making him angry. She was the fuel to his fire in so many ways and they were all dangerous.

"No! You haven't been listening to me," she yells, parking the car midway out of her spot, exiting the vehicle, standing on her tip toes to reach his face. Even that way, she falls short. "You have treated me like I'm nothing but gum under your shoe this entire week and I don't appreciate it, Peeta!"

Peeta opens his mouth to argue but he can't find a thing to say. What could he say? She was right.

"Am I just some girl you sleep with? Some girl you get to bamboozle into bed? Is that what I am to you? Am I no better than Glimmer or Clove?" She asks rhetorically. "Am I a disposable piece of ass to you?"

"No! How could you-"

"Because that is how you are treating me and I don't deserve to be treated that way you, asshole!" She screams, tears falling from her eyes as she struggles to keep her facial expressions under control. "I am not some whore you mess around with and if that is what you want then go get it!"

Peeta shakes his head rapidly, his heart in his stomach. "I lo-"

"Good fucking luck tonight. I'm sure i'll get to hearing about it at some point," she interrupts, climbing back into her car and speeding away, not leaving a second more for conversation.

Peeta stands watching the taillights of her car fade into the distance, fade into his memory. How did he let things get like this?

Finnicks hand on his shoulder breaks him from his trance, his friend pulling him along and far away from all the anxious glances he receives as he makes his way to the locker room. Oh right. They have a game to win.

But none if it matters. Not any of it.

...

They win the game by a landslide, Peeta playing the best game of his high school career.

The boys invite him to a party but he has other plans.

...

The parking lot of the car dealership is empty when he pulls up but in the distance he can see the dim light coming from within the glass walls. The sign on the window said they were open so he takes this as an invitation.

It doesn't take long to find Katniss, being her small little office is the first one. She's there, dressed in her work clothes, her head on her desk. Peeta can hear her soft snore.

When he knocks on the door frame she awakens, her eyes glassy as she blinks away the sleep, adjusting to the change in lighting. The whole town had been at the game. Peeta wouldn't be surprised if the dealership hadn't seen a single soul tonight.

"Hey, you," Peeta whispers, taking a seat in the wooden chair across from her.

"I didn't expect to see you tonight," she tells him truthfully, her fingers unknotting her matted hair. "You shouldn't be here. You should be out with your friends having fun. I heard about the win."

"I wanted to spend my night with my girlfriend instead," Peeta says. He rests his head on his hands, his eyes falling shut. He takes a chance and reaches across the wood, his fingers not stopping until they find her own, knotting through them. She's reluctant at first but gives in after awhile.

"Is that what I am, Peeta?" She questions softly, her eyes trained on the desk before her. Peeta lifts his head immediately, his eyebrows glued together as he studies her face.

"What would give you the idea that you weren't?" He asks, his voice catching in his throat. Did she not want to be his girlfriend anymore? Was this the end of it all?

"You've been treating me like a stranger these past few weeks," she answers. "I was worried that maybe you were trying to drop subtle hints."

"Katniss I will never break up with you," he promises.

"Don't say that Peeta," she whispers. "We're young."

"Well, maybe but I know I love you."

Her eyes water again. "Why are you treating me this way then?"

"I don't know," he mumbles. "Maybe I just have a crappy way of dealing with stress."

Katniss nods, wiping her eyes as she moves around the desk to place herself in his lap, her lips finding his hair. "I don't want to stress you out. I just want to be there for you."

And maybe that is why Peeta is having such a hard time adjusting to the way Katniss operates. Maybe because no one has ever been there for him. Not the way the beautiful girl before him is.

"I love you so much," Peeta says, his head burying itself within the crook of her neck.

"Ditto," she whispers, pulling his face up to place the smallest of kisses on his lips.

"Don't ever say you're just a girl I have sex with either, Katniss," he warns her, her words from earlier making a hole in his heart. "You're the only girl I ever want to have sex with."

"Not even Jennifer Lawrence?" She jokes, rubbing her nose against the top of his hair.

"She comes nowhere close to you," he confirms. "I'm not that into blondes anyway."

"Oh no?"

"No. I'm not into girls really."

Her cheeks blush. "I knew something was fishy about you and Finnicks relationship the moment I stepped foot in Panem."

Peeta laughs.

"Just Katniss Everdeens."

...

"If I make this shot you have to tell Katniss you want to try anal," Finnick wagers, basketball in hand, bouncing steadily on the concrete.

"You're out of your fucking mind man, she would break up with me before I even got the words all the way out," Peeta tells him, his face blushing at even thought. Katniss was pretty open to anything, sexually, but he doubted she would even give thought to the idea. Peeta isn't even sure he would like it that much. It doesn't seem intimate at all.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I bet Katniss likes all the fucking kinky shit," Marvel says, stealing the ball from Finnick, banking a perfect three without effort. He hoots and hollers and parades around the boys, moving his arms wildly like bird.

"And you boys will never find out," Peeta answers, shaking his head at his friends. "Times like this where I wish you assholes had girlfriends so we could stop constantly talking about mine."

"You don't like talking about your girlfriend?" Finnick asks.

"I love talking about her. I don't like talking about her without any clothes on. At least not to you guys," he says, dribbling the ball between his legs. "How's Annie by the way?

Finnick starts paying attention at this point, a smile creeping onto his face. "She's the most amazing women I've ever met, Peet."

"Happy for you, Finn."

...

The team is off to a good start, one of the best starts in Panem history and all the papers claim it's because of Peeta.

He tries to be humble, explain to all how he couldn't do it by himself but the papers perceive his praise to his team mates differently, comparing him to Peyton Manning.

When his mother tells him that's the most foolish thing she's ever heard, he agrees with her.

...

"I almost don't know how to handle dating a football star," Katniss jokes one day at the bakery, flipping through the local papers news story on Peeta, his life and his brothers and the current season the football program was having. Peeta knows Katniss could care less about what is being said but she tries to act interested for his sake. "I almost can't handle it. Do I need to pay to be in your presence?"

"Oh please, Katniss," he sighs, rolling his eyes as he works the last of the breads for the day. Despite being a, quote on quote, football star, there was still money to be made working at the bakery. His parents hadn't let him abandon his responsibilities but he didn't mind. The bakery was a welcome distraction. "I will give you my autograph though. Just for safe keeping."

"I understand. One day it may be worth a million dollars. That will be a story to tell," she says, sucking her fingers clean of the powdered sugar that stained them. "If you make me these sugar things for the rest of my life, I will love you for all eternity."

"So If I don't you'll send me to the dogs?"

Katniss nods. "Sounds about right."

Peeta grabs a handful of flour, flicking some her way until she is completely covered with little bits of white dust, outlining her clothes and hair and Peeta has no choice but to laugh at the way she looks. Her mouth is open wide, her eyes shut as a slow smile spreads across her face.

Before Peeta has a chance to blink, he, too, is covered in the powder, the Mellark shirt he wears completely ruined by the substance. When he cracks an eye open, Katniss is laughing, a hand over her mouth as she doubles over.

"You should've seen the look on your face," she laughs, pointing to the clump of white molasses stuck in his hair.

"You know, I've had about enough of this," he says, hoisting the small girl over his shoulder as she screams, laughing as he lies her down on the wooden counter top, pushing the hair from her face as he draws patterns in the flour on her skin. "You're beautiful."

"Even like this?" She asks, holding her palms out to him.

"Yes. Even like this," he confirms, pressing a firm kiss to her lips, tasting the cinnamon on her mouth as his tongue makes it's way inside her mouth almost immediately. She allows it, her hands coming to rest on his shoulders as he settles between her body, his hands clawing at her waist.

They stay like this for awhile, not making any moves to deepen their act, just kissing innocently like those first few months in their relationship before the clothes started coming off. Peeta wished they had more months just like this one but he would never complain about their new explorations. But when she kissed him like this, he felt more needed, less primal. It did amaze Peeta though, that despite all the thresholds he had crossed with this women, her lips still managed to spark something inside him.

The opening of the door breaks them apart, a loud clang causing Katniss to jump from the table, her eyes growing big as she realizes the state she's in. Looking down at the bulge in his pants, the state he was in as well.

But it isn't his mother who has come through the door, thankfully. It is his brothers, Rye and Wheaton who stand with blushed cheeks and big smiles.

Peeta had known they were coming home today for the Thanksgiving holidays, but he had assumed they would head straight home after the hour drive in from the nearest big city, wait for him there versus being forced into hard labor here. But there they were. Identical and big, college football really filling them out but no more than Peeta.

"Rye! Wheaton! Hello," Katniss greets, running towards them with open arms. They encircle her without hesitation, giving Peeta a confused glanced once they realize the two of them are drenched in flour. Peeta shrugs.

"Come here, bro," Wheaton says, offering Peeta an awkward man hug while Rye does the same, the four of them standing in awkward silence after the initial greetings have taken place.

"You go see mom yet?" Peeta asks, knowing his mother has been dying for her oldest sons to come home. She had spent hours talking at dinner about how good it will be to have a full house again, how much she misses her baby boys. Peeta rolled his eyes the entire time at how full of crock shit his mother could be at times.

Rye nods. "Yeah. She just left a few minutes ago. Said she wasn't feeling good or something, I don't know. Have a feeling she's just tired."

"Yeah, besides, we couldn't come into town without coming to see our favorite little brother first," Wheaton agrees, putting Peeta into a head lock and tousling his curls like he's always done. Except, Peeta isn't twelve anymore and the height difference isn't all that much.

"And our favorite little girlfriend," Rye says, pulling Katniss to his side, offering her a smile as she swings an arm around his waist.

The oldest Mellarks had fallen in love with Katniss over the summer much like Peeta had. She had become a part of the family, at least in their minds. In fact, when they left back for college at the end of the summer, Katniss was the one who cried in the middle of the airport. Peeta tried not to let it bother him but his brothers were relentless about the teasing.

"Yeah, yeah. Stop touching my girlfriend," Peeta says.

"All good, family fun," Rye tells him. "Did you guys disinfect this thing first?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Peeta asks, moving to place the loaves of bread in the oven, setting the timer. He knew it would be midnight by the time he got out of here but maybe, if Katniss stayed, it would be bearable.

"He means, how many times have you guys had sex on this thing?" Wheaton finishes for him. Twin telepathy, you could say.

Peeta rolls his eyes, already tired of his brothers being home for break and they had another two weeks to go. "Never, assholes. We don't do those type of things," Peeta whispers, not comfortable talking about his sex life with his girlfriend in the room.

"Is this true, Kitty Kat?" Rye asks, moving to set next to Katniss on a bar stool, putting his head in his hands innocently.

Katniss just shrugs her shoulders, not looking as uncomfortable as Peeta feels. "Whatever Peeta says goes," she answers, winking at the boy with the bread before turning her attention back to Rye who has jumped into a story about the number of "chicks he's fucked right in this very spot".

"I don't believe that for a minute," Peeta scoffs, rolling his eyes at his brothers blatant lies. "Mom would've killed you if she found out and no girl would ever come back here to have sex with you."

"I bet Katniss came back here to have sex with you," Wheaton says, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. Peeta just shakes his head, turning his back to his brother and wrapping a protective arm around his girlfriend.

"You know, you should be thanking us, Katniss," Rye says. "We taught our baby bro everything he knows. So when you're screaming out, you should be yelling our names."

Peeta is about ready to pull his hair out when he hears her laugh.

"Well thank you two but I think Peeta has managed pretty well on his own," she says, her eyes meeting his for a fraction of a second before turning back towards the two boys in front of her.

"Oh yeah?" Wheaton asks humorously.

"Oh yes. Peeta, did you tell them about the thing you do with your hips when you get me to put my leg by my ear?"

Peeta just about loses it right then and there, not even wanting to look towards his brothers who are silent for the time being. The blush on his cheeks burns his whole body and he's sure he'e being burned alive at this very moment.

No, Peeta did not tell them about the thing he does with his hips when he gets Katniss to contort her body in ways he doesn't even understand. Those are not things he wished to share with anybody, especially his brothers, but it seemed Katniss had other plans. She doesn't look the least bit ashamed when she meets his eye.

"Holy shit, Peet," Rye whispers after a while, shaking his head from side to side.

"Hard to think our baby bro is getting more than we are," Wheaton says at the same time.

When he looks down at her, all she does is wink.

...

They lose in the second round of playoffs to a corn fed team from the middle of no where.

His brothers are on the sidelines for that one, screaming and riding all the upperclassmen who played under them at some point. Coach Abernathy uses them as a success story when speaking to the reporters and fans and whoever else may ask.

Though the loss brings pain to Peetas heart, he walks off the field with a smile on his face, thanking all the seniors that made this night possible and telling everyone else their coming back for blood the next time around.

He gets four letters in the mail the next day.

...

By Thanksgiving, the letters have nearly doubled.

They all sit on his hardwood table, none of the Mellarks really ready to open them and read what they contain. A few stand out to him: Alabama, Auburn, Kentucky, Clemson, Penn State...

All his dream schools are suddenly on his dining room table beckoning for him and he can't bring himself to open any of them.

...

He doesn't have to tell Katniss about the letters. She had always been confident they'd come so when she'd seen them unopened in his room, she knew what day it was.

"Why haven't you opened this one yet?" She asks, holding up the one from Penn State. Peeta shrugs. "This is your dream."

It was his dream but it didn't feel like a dream any longer. Not if it meant leaving Katniss behind.

They hadn't spoken much about college, mostly because they had a year before it became a problem but now it seemed they would have too.

"Why haven't you open these yet, Peeta?" She asks, going to sit on the bed beside him, her eyes on his knotted hands.

"I'm scared, I guess," he answers.

"Of what?"

"The future."

"Well, it's going to come wether you open these letters now or not," she tells him, forcing the envelope into his hands. He knew what it said. He didn't have to open it. That wasn't the problem.

"What about your future?" Peeta asks quietly.

"We'll cross the bridge when we come to it, how about that?"

...

Peeta is so deep in her he doesn't know where she begins and he ends. He loves it.

He doesn't know how long they've been at it; days, months, years, he's lost track but it doesn't matter. All that matters is Katniss, sweaty and moaning underneath him, her nails clawing up and down his back as he moves inside of her, his hand playing with her clit as she comes so suddenly.

It takes him four more thrusts to follow her, moaning her name as his seed tumbles inside of her, inside of one of the last condoms they have.

"Well have to buy more soon," he tells her, disposing of the ruined device in her bathroom, running back towards her room just to be sure. They were alone but someone could come home at any moment. "One hundred went fast, huh?"

She laughs, using the blanket to cover her naked chest. Peeta wishes she wouldn't. She is so beautiful in so many ways and she doesn't even realize it.

"I've been meaning to talk to you about that," she answers, running her fingers over his scalp as his eyes drift closed.

"Hm?"

"I've been on birth control for a while now, just to be sure," she starts. "We don't... We don't have to use a condom if you don't want too."

Peetas eyes open at her confession, taking a moment to judge if she is serious or not. She is the only person he's ever been with. He is the only person she's ever been with. But still, he knows what a big decision this can be.

"What if you get pregnant?" He asks hesitantly, wanting more than anything to be inside her without a covering but knowing there are many things that could go wrong if they chose to take this route. He wanted Katniss to be the mother of his children, just not within the next ten years.

"There's a very low possibility of that," she tells him. "We can still use condoms if that's what you want to do but..."

He shakes his head. "If that's what you're comfortable with than so am I."

Everything is so quiet, Peeta is sure she's fallen to sleep. But then she speaks slowly.

"I'm never having children," she says.

"Why not?"

"The worlds to dangerous for such innocent life."

Peeta didn't agree but if she didn't want children, neither did he.

...

Finnick and Thresh receive letters too, not the abundance Peeta had but a few, some from the same places. They all agree to open them together, away from their other friends who were still anxiously waiting for letters of their own which may never come.

They decide Threshs backyard is the safest place. Somewhere no one will suspect them so they climb into the safety of the stone walls, using their phones as light as they try their best to read the tiny writing that would somehow dictate their futures.

"They want me," Thresh says first.

"Me too," Finnick says. Peeta thinks he sees tears welling in his eyes but it is so dark, he can't really tell.

Peeta nods his head. Penn State wants him. His dream wants him and from the looks of things, they want his friends do. He can't think of a better scenario.

So why doesn't he feel happy?

...

"Katniss, what are you going to do about college?" He asks her, her naked body draped over his as she plays with the wisps of blonde hair on his toned chest, her breathing not yet evened out. Peeta was still hard and sagging inside of her but he didn't feel an ounce of arousal, his mind consumed by too many thoughts to form a proper one.

Katniss looks up, unconnecting the two and padding across the room into Peetas bathroom, examining her naked body in the mirror as she plays with the controls of the shower. She always showers after sex, at least if his parents aren't home.

"I don't know Peeta. I'm only a junior. I've got some time," she tells him, using her fingers to pull apart the knitted strands of hair, her eyes not meeting his.

"Have you thought about it?"

Katniss shakes her head from side to side.

"Do you need someone to advise you on these things because if that's the case then-"

"I don't know, Peeta," she cuts in. "I don't have money for college."

Peeta didn't doubt this. His parents barley had money for college. "But their are tons of scholarships available if you know where to look."

"I'm not you. I don't have people banging down my door begging to pay for my tuition," Katniss answers, her tone harsher than she'd like.

"I never said that, Katniss," he huffs, turning away from her.

"I know you're trying to help but I'll figure it all out when the time comes. You don't need to worry about me."

But all Peeta did is worry because that's what love is, right?

...

When Mrs. Mellark suggests Katniss come over for Christmas dinner, he had been pleasantly surprised. She makes the comment one late night when the two are working in the bakery alone, putting in the trash all the bake goods that weren't sold that day.

When Peeta begins boxing up a few cheese buns, Mrs. Mellark questions him. "What are you doing with that trash?"

"I'm taking it to Katniss," he tells her. "She loves these things."

"Trash for the trash. How pleasant."

But then she went on to say how she would like to have Katniss over for dinner. Peeta had his doubts but his father assured him it was a step in the right direction and his brothers would be there as well, making the situation less uncomfortable. The way Mr. Mellark made it sound, there was no getting out of it. Peeta has no choice but to beg her to spend the last few hours of such a joyful holiday in such a loveless home.

She agrees reluctantly.

...

Christmas dinner has been the same since Peeta could remember. A whole chicken, roasted red potatoes, steamed broccoli, and an array of delicious deserts to choose from. So he was delighted to see all his favorites placed on the dinner table, his grandparents already seated in their regular seats, Katniss at his side and his brothers waiting patiently across from them.

"I'm so glad you all could make it," Mrs. Mellark says to the guests, smiling to her in laws, frowning at Katniss. "It's so nice to be surrounded by people who mean so much to our family."

"Yes. And a special thanks to Katniss Everdeen for joining us tonight," Mr. Mellark says, his hand finding Katnisses shaking arm under the table and giving it a tight squeeze. Katniss smiles the best she can but it's forced, unlike her.

"All the way from the Seam," Mrs. Mellark finishes, bringing the glass of wine she'd poured herself to her lips and drinking greedily. The smile Katniss wears disappears.

Peeta looks across to his brothers who look wide eyed and uncomfortable, than to his last two living grandparents who are too old to even understand what is being said. His father sighs heavily, motioning for them all to begin eating.

How good the food tastes momentarily distracts him from his own anger towards his mother.

"So Katniss, how was the Christmas at the Everdeen home?" His mother asks, spearing a piece of chicken into her mouth, her eyes uninterested.

"It was wonderful. My sister got the most beautiful dress from my mother and Peeta gave me these beautiful earrings," Katniss answers, the sterling silver studs Peeta got her shining on her ears. He can't keep the smile off of his face. "We went down to the lake and did a little ice skating. My sister, Prim, loves it but me nor my mother have ever been really all that great at it."

"Oh, Peeta is a wonderful ice skater," Mr. Mellark says, the blush on Peetas cheeks running over his whole body. His brothers laugh loudly, slapping each other on the back as the other chokes.

"I had no idea. Maybe he should be the one teaching Prim," Katniss jokes, smiling towards Peeta.

"Peeta has no time for ice skating his too busy creating himself a future. Isn't that right, Peeta?" Mrs. Mellark says, her eyes begging for an answer.

No one says a thing, everyone continuing to eat in silence like most dinners at the Mellark home.

"Any plans for college yet?" Mrs. Mellark asks.

Katniss shakes her head. "No. Not yet. I've still got a year."

"A year," she mutters below her breath. "I wouldn't wait a year, dear. All the good colleges will pass you by at that time."

"I guess," Katniss mumbles.

"And what scholarships do you have lined up? I'm sure your poor mother wouldn't possibly be able to afford-"

"Mom," Peeta warns, looking towards his father for help.

"Don't interrupt, Peeta. That's rude. All I'm saying is, there is no possible way her family would be able to afford college living in the home they-"

"Mom," the twins say in unison, their eyes trained on the patterned table cloth.

"I'm sure there is something out there for people like you," she says finally.

"For _people like me_?" Katniss asks in disbelief, the hand she had enclosed in Peetas moving to free itself. "I'm sorry. I don't know what you mean by that, Mrs. Mellark."

"Yes. People like you," she answers. "People poor and of low class like-"

"That's enough, Karen," Mr. Mellark says, holding his hand up to silence her.

"It's fine. Really," Katniss says hurriedly, wiping her mouth with the napkin on her lap and getting to her feet. "I should get going,"

"You don't have to go," Peeta says, grabbing ahold of her arm as she turns to leave. For some reason, he feels as if he lets her go, she won't be coming back.

"I never should have come here in the first place, Peeta," she whispers. "Thank you all for the food. Merry Christmas."

...

By the time Peeta manages to get his bearings and know to follow after her, she's already gone.

...

She doesn't answer a single call or text, the new year coming and going without any word from Katniss.

He goes by her job, sees her working through the glass window with Gale Hawthorne who is back from break. This makes his heart catch in his throat. He doesn't go in to speak with her, not wanting to cause a scene in her work place.

He would let her be mad at him. She deserved at least that.

...

The only reason Peeta knows she needs a ride on a cold January day is because Prim came by the bakery early this morning on her way to school with her friend, Rue, begging Peeta to pick the both of them up so they no longer had to walk. "And can you two just kiss and makeup already?" She asked, side stepping her way out of the bakery at the sight of Mrs. Mellark in the back room.

Peeta wishes they could. That is all he wanted.

He's tried many times over the past two weeks since Christmas to apologize to her, tell her he was sorry on behalf of his mother but he never got more than a two word response and even that wasn't the least bit helpful is deciphering her feelings. It was all a guessing game and Peeta was very bad at it.

When he knocks on the front door to Katnisses house, she is surprised to see him, her snow boots secured around her skin tight jeans and her ear muffs in place. She looked like so lost and little within the security of her winter apparel, Peeta wasn't even sure it was her at all.

"About to take on a snow storm?" Peeta jokes, offering her the biggest smile he can manage.

"Just about," she whispers, moving around him to continue down the icy path that leads to school.

"It isn't safe to walk out here, Katniss. You know that," he says. "You could fall and break something and then how fucked would we be."

She offers him a small smile, one she can't retain but before she shows any true signs of joy, she swallows the emotion and her steely exterior returns. "I'll be okay, Peeta. My people and I have fared much worse than a little snow."

Peetas smile disappears too. "Katniss.."

"What, Peeta?" She asks, exasperated, her arms crossing over her chest as she continues down the road.

Peeta follows after her, having to start a light jog in order to keep up with her quick movements. They are moving farther and farther away but she shows no signs of stopping so neither does he. "Katniss, please wait."

"Peeta, leave me alone, please," she whispers.

"I don't want to leave you alone," he says, grabbing ahold of the sleeve of her jacket. "Just talk to me Katniss. I'm sorry."

"I know you're sorry, Peeta. I'm not mad at you," she says, hiding her eyes behind the hood of her coat. "I'm just mad."

"Well lets be mad together," Peeta says. "I know how my mother can be and I'm sorry I let her say those things to you."

"She's right, Peeta."

"No, she's not. You're so much more than what she gives you credit for and I wish I could find a way to make you see that," he pleads. "I don't care what my mother thinks of-"

"But I do, Peeta! And yes, your mother is horrible but that doesn't not make her your mother. I want her to like me. I want her to want me to sit at that dinner table and not look at me like a stray dog that you let in," Katniss finishes, her eyes tearing as she says the words.

Peeta had long ago stopped feeling the effects of his mothers words but Katniss was new to them all and they still stung her like a whip to her bare back.

"It doesn't matter, Katniss," Peeta says, grabbing ahold to one of her gloved hands. "We have a year and a half left in this place and then we can forget all about it and all the bitter mothers we left behind. Who will care then when she is nothing but a distant memory?"

"Who says I'll leave this place, Peeta?"

"I do," he says. "What's mine is yours."

Katniss face softens, her arms winding around Peeta until she is snuggled into his chest.

"I really fucking love you," she whispers.

Peeta nods. "Me too."

...

Johanna and Thresh break up the following week for reasons they won't tell anyone.

Thresh is devastated, crying to Peeta in the comfort of his car when they are alone, his sobs the only sound within a ten miles radius. For a moment, Peeta even wraps his arms around his large friend, patting his back in a comforting way until he's done, wiping his eyes and blowing his nose into the sleeve of his jacket.

"We've been together for over a year man, this shit hurts," he tells him. Peeta doesn't judge the boy because he knows if things were to ever end between him and Katniss, he would be the same way.

...

The first time they have sex without a condom is Valentines Day, in the basement of Marvels house while he hosts the real party upstairs, the moldy lower floor of the home the only place with a lock.

Katniss is naked in no time, wet and dripping before Peeta even has a chance to mess with buckle of his belt, his hands slipping on the metal and leather in anticipation. He hadn't brought a condom with him, knowing they were down the two or three and not wanting to waste them. Katniss was naked and unless she was hiding one between her breasts, she too had neglected to get the only necessity. But it wasn't a necessity any longer.

"We don't have to do this if you don't want too," he tells her, steadying her hips as she grinds into his erection, preparing him for what is about to come. When her clit grazes the head of his cock, they both moan out in ecstasy.

"I want too, Peeta," she confirms. "Is it okay with you?"

She was already positioned over him, angling his body so he would slide easily into hers. If he had any doubts, the moment the head of his erection grazed her wet folds, all of them went away.

"It's fine," he moans, his head falling back as she slides onto him for the first time without protection. He'll lose it any moment, he knows it. He's never felt anything this good, so tight and wet. It was more than he could have ever dreamed and in this moment, he didn't know why they waited almost two years into their relationship before taking this step.

"Peeta, this feels so good," she says, propelling herself up and down, her eyes shutting when Peetas thumb comes into play.

"You're so tight and wet, and oh my god," Peeta agrees, thrusting in time with her now, knowing his release is coming. He has to get her there first though, so he positioned his lips above her ear, his tongue darting out to wet the lobe. "Katniss I fucking love you."

"Harder," she moans in response, her eyes opening as her fingers grasp at his jaw.

"You'd like that, huh? You like my cock in your pussy."

Katniss moans loudly. "Oh god, Peeta. Do I ever."

Peeta gives a particularly hard thrust, her moans becoming more of yelps, Peetas favorite sounds. A few more thrusts and she's tightening around him, calling out as he follows her, moaning into the hollow of her throat as his hips jerk.

"You make me like a wild animal, you know," Katniss tells him once their breathing has returned to normal, the stain on her cheeks slowly fading back to it's original olive color.

Peeta wraps an arm around her middle, his lips making way to their usual after sex spot. "Thank you for that, Katniss."

"I wouldn't have wanted to have that experience with anyone else but you," she whispers, turning her head to meet his lips. He tastes the salt and knows she's crying.

"What's wrong, Katniss?" He asks, pulling away from her to judge her face.

"I love you so much it scares me," she admits, her words shaky and heartfelt. He unwraps his arms from around her body, wiping away the tears that fall, his head falling into her hair.

"It shouldn't scare you, Katniss," he soothes. "I love you just as much, you know that."

"You're leaving Peeta."

"Not without you."

...

Coach Abernathy calls him into his office in mid March, a number of papers scattered on the poor mans desk, a look of annoyance and exhaustion on his features as he asks Peeta to sit down.

"My phone has been ringing off the hook about you boy," he says, motioning around to all what appears to be actual work. "I can't say I've had schools be this interested in anyone. Not even your brothers."

"They've been calling me too," Peeta whispers.

The phone at the bakery had been going off nonstop for the past week and half, the men on the other end begging Mr. Mellark to let them have a moment to speak with Peeta. Mrs. Mellark had just about lost her mind with it all, constantly cursing and, at one point, taking the phone off the receiver. That stunt was short lived being they did, still, have customers to attend too.

"And you haven't spoken to a person?" He warns.

"Not one," Peeta confirms. He knew the rules. The last thing he wanted was to lose his eligibility for doing something stupid like picking up the phone.

"Listen to me here, boy. I already know what you're thinking being your two knuckle headed friends out there are getting some of the same calls you are," he says, pointing to Finnick and Thresh on the other side of the glass, looking nervous as they sit waiting for their own meetings. "And I want you to know whatever you decide, I will support you as will all those people out there on Friday nights cheering for you. I just want you to make the decision you want to make."

Peeta had already made his decision. Penn State was his future and I'm sure Coach Abernathy knew that as well. He was doing it for him. The fact that Finnick and Thresh would be going along for the ride were just an added bonus.

"I'm doing it for me," Peeta nods, looking down, trying to decipher the meaning of the paperwork on the desk. It all looks like gibberish, coach talk that he isn't even sure the man sitting before him understands.

"Well you let me know what you wanna do and I'll start doing my job."

...

"Katniss, where are we going?" Peeta groans, digging his heels into the muddy ground as Katniss leads him by the hand. He was blind folded the moment he walked out of his door by his girlfriend, instructed to not ask any questions being he would not get any answers. He didn't really need to ask any questions though.

Katniss was a bad liar as were all his friends. Their avoidance on the Saturday proceeding his birthday only meant one thing. A surprise party.

Peeta would only entertain the idea for her because he knew she wanted to make this birthday special, something he would remember. He would have honestly been more than happy with some sex in the back of his car like last year but he would keep his mouth shut for the time being.

"I can't do that," Katniss replies in a sing song voice, her hand wrapped tightly around his. "We're almost there."

And as they near their destination, Peeta begins to hear the music and his suspicions are confirmed.

When Katniss finally removes the blind fold, almost all of the junior and senior class is occupying Finnicks back yard, a large bouncy house in the center of it all, more than a few people already in the pool though the weather didn't really permit it. Peeta was expecting it but he's unable to keep the smile off of his face.

He looks to Katniss who looks equally as thrilled, her smile contagious as she reaches up to place a soft kiss on his cheek. He notices now how beautiful she looks, her down and resting at her hips, the green sundress she wears perfect on her skin tone. He could spend the rest of the night looking at her but before he has the chance, he's swarmed by a mountain of people, some he doesn't even know, all hugging him, wishing him a happy birthday.

He loses Katniss in the madness but when his eyes search for her, he finds her sitting by Annie, a drink in her hand as she watches him with a shy smile.

"Isn't this cool, man?" Cato asks, enveloping him as he walks forward.

"Yeah, it really is," Peeta agrees. It wasn't the cliche, cheesy party he was expecting.

"We all pitched in on this one," Thom says, downing back whatever is in his own red cup. "Katniss pretty much held us at gun point until we did."

"You got a hard headed one," Marvel chimes in, clapping Peeta on the back.

Peeta glances another look at her, the way she leans back in her chair to laugh at whatever Annie is saying, her eyes meeting his for a second before flitting away.

Goddamn does he love this girl.

...

Peeta gets drunk, drunker than he's ever been and by the time the party disperses and he finally has a moment alone with Katniss, his body is refusing to operate.

She is just as drunk as he is, laughing at him as he struggles, cursing at his beloved organ where it hangs flat.

"It's okay, Peeta. Just kiss me," she says.

So he does.

...

"Peeta, guess who is coming to dinner tomorrow night?" Mrs. Mellark asks on a early April morning as Peeta is getting ready for school, scarfing down the bowl of cereal he poured himself.

He doesn't offer his mother a look, simply grunting in a sign of acknowledgement and finishing his breakfast.

"Delly Cartwright."

Peeta isn't surprised. His mother had been pinning for Delly since Peeta was old enough to become interested in girls. She was nice, a little pale and plump but nice. She spoke to everyone with the same, genuine curiosity and over the year, they had become closer. Not in the way his mother would wish but she had become someone he would consider a very good friend.

With this in mind, he doesn't mind her coming over for dinner knowing it will be just of a joke to her as it is to him.

...

Dinner is, to say in the least, awkward.

His mother had not only invited Delly to sit with the Mellarks but her mother and father along with her two younger sisters who sat awkwardly in their velvet dresses, poking at the roast his mother had cooked.

No one speaks, not really. Mrs. Cartwright and Mrs. Mellark share polite talk, commenting on the drapes his mother had put up in the living room or the new shade of her new dress she'd bought for church.

Peeta keeps stealing glances at Delly who is covering her mouth with her napkin, trying to hard the smile on her face. Peeta smirks, not understanding what she's finding funny but he's sure he will as well.

"Delly, are you seeing anyone?" Mrs. Mellark asks.

Delly shakes her head rapidly from side to side, her eyes darting over to her father who looks red faced and uncomfortable. "No mam. No one has come along."

"Oh, I wouldn't say that," she says. "You and Peeta have known each other for awhile! What a beautiful couple the two of you would make."

Delly blushes. "Well no. I think the two of us are better as friends, Mrs. Mellark."

Mrs. Mellark laughs without humor. "Can't knock it till you try it, no?"

Delly freezes, looking to Peeta for help but he cannot form a coherent thought.

"Don't you have a long time girlfriend of your own, Peeta?" Mrs. Cartwright asks, sending him a shy smile.

Peeta nods his head rapidly. "I do," he says. "We're very happy. Looking forward too-"

"Oh, Peeta. You're too young to be looking forward to anything, dear," Mrs. Mellark interrupts, her eyes instantly losing the gleam they had moments ago.

"That maybe so but I think Katniss is a wonderful girl, Mrs. Mellark. She has become one of my very good friends," Delly says, winking at Peeta.

Mrs. Mellark is silent for the rest of dinner, sulking through desert and skipping the after dinner conversation in the living room. Peeta hears the door slam with just enough for to know it was intentional.

Delly suggests they leave, go outside and drive around for awhile because it seems Mr. Cartwright and Mr. Mellark are completely invested in whatever basketball game is on the television. They won't be leaving anytime soon.

They take Dellys care, winding down the long roads of Panem until they find the old playground they used to frequent as children, worn down now and under kept.

"Look at this place," Delly says, running her hands over the vines that have twisted their way up the slide. "It's ruined."

"We used to love coming here," Peeta says, laughing at the memory of Delly in her plaid dresses with braids in her hair. She laughs to when he tells her this, sitting on a swing much to low for him. "Crazy we're seventeen now, huh?"

"I know," she agrees. "About to go off to college and all. I feel like my whole childhood has flown by."

Peeta nods his head in agreement. He was tired of Panem having lived here all his life but he would miss it when he left, miss the warm gentle comfort of home. He tried not to think too much past next year but it was impossible to stop himself.

"Have you decided where you're going yet?"

He had as had Finnick and Thresh but he doesn't tell her so. He shakes his head.

"Neither have I. Momma would love if I went to state but I don't think that's really in the cards for me. Maybe Vanderbilt," Delly says.

"That'd be the perfect place for you, Dells," Peeta agrees.

She smiles. "You think?"

They sit in silence.

"Where do you think Katniss will end up?" Delly asks.

Peeta has thought a lot about that. He still hasn't been able to come up with an answer. "Somewhere just as wonderful as she is."

He hopes that somewhere is with him.

...

Delly drops him back off at his house a quarter to twelve, her parents station wagon long gone. After bidding each other goodnight, Peeta unlocks the front door to his home, shaking awake his father who has fallen asleep on his Lazy Boy. "Go upstairs to bed, dad," he tells him, moving to shut off the TV.

"Did you have a nice time tonight son?" He asks groggily.

Peeta nods his head. "Of course dad. Delly is my friend."

"I know that son," he says. "I wish Katniss could have joined us tonight."

Peeta wishes that too. "Mom would never have that."

"Give your mother a break, Peeta," his dad whispers, his tone meaning something other than what his words say.

"Why should I?"

...

Peeta finds out why when his brothers come home for the summer holidays two weeks later.

His parents sit the boys in the living room, all on one couch across from their parents who look rather grief stricken. His mother tired and his father absent. Peeta knows what they are going to say before the words tumble from their fathers lips and his mother lets out the horrid cry.

Their mother has cancer. Has had it for a good handful of months but was trying to see her options before telling the boys. It's inoperable. She will start chemo therapy on Monday.

"We ask for your strength and your love and support during this time, boys," Mr. Mellark says. "Your mother will be fine."

Peeta feels numb.

...

"Is it bad I'm not sad?" He asks Finnick later that night, the two of them sitting in awkward silence. His own mother was dealing with a terminal illness and he couldn't bring himself to cry, or feel sad, or feel anything for that matter.

Finnick ponders this. "No. I mean she hasn't been the easiest mother to grow up with," he says.

"But she's still my mother."

Finnick nods his head. "But she's still your mother."

...

Peeta holds off on telling Katniss, not because he wants too but because she is so happy about the college letter of interest she got from a few colleges.

"It looks like I might actually be going somewhere," she says excitedly, throwing her arms around him and kissing him square on the mouth until he can't breathe.

What kind of boyfriend would he be to ruin her excitement?

...

On his mothers third round of chemo, his father suggests they all go with her, sit through the process and hold her hand for comfort and support.

Rye gets out of it somehow, claiming he has some business to take care of but Peeta knows he'll probably stay at the house, drink all of dads cheap whisky until he gets drunk enough to pass out. Peeta wishes he could be so lucky.

But instead he sits in the cold hospital, his mother moaning aimlessly as the chemo drips into her system. Peeta tries to block his ears, block out the noise because it makes him cringe, makes him angry and sick and he wants to scream. No one elses families are here, all the patients are alone. Why did his father have to subject him to this? Why? Why? Why?

When Peeta gets to his feet, no one stops him. He mumbles some excuse, something about being thirsty and leaves the room, wondering down the hall as images of his dying mother cloud his vision, drive him insane. He finds a hallway, mostly empty except for a few nurses who seem to be paying him no mind. He tucks his feet underneath himself and sits down, breathing deeply as if he's just run a mile.

He isn't sure what he feels. He isn't sure why he is having to act this way but whatever it is, it's eating him alive. Maybe it's guilt. Maybe it's guilt for hating his mother so much he almost wishes for her to have this fate. That must be it.

When a warm hand touches his shoulder, he jerks wildly. He must have dozed off because the clock on the wall says it's nearing for and his mothers appointment began a little after eleven. Had he been out that long? Had the countless sleepless nights finally caught up with him?

Peeta eyes look up, landing on a pair of blue ones he hadn't wished too see.

Ms. Everdeen stands over him, a scowl on her face that reminds him too much of Katniss for comfort. She wears her scrubs, the purple ones he so commonly saw her in, her hair braided down her backs like Prims always was. "Peeta, are you alright?"

Peeta stands abruptly, wiping the sleep from his eyes, shoving his hands into his pockets. Looking into her round full eyes, he cannot stop himself as the words spew from his mouth without control.

He tells her everything, tells her all about the cancer and the chemo and about Penn State in the fall. He tells her about the love he feels for her daughter and how he can't stand upsetting her and how he wishes he didn't have to go but he has too. Then he jumps into how crazy he feels for feeling what he does, how guilty he is for not caring about his mothers well being and how is unable to be sad for such a bad women.

Ms. Everdeen listens, her hand gripping Peetas forearm as he parades around the hallway like a mad man, hair in his fist. He cries then, not because he is sad but because he is confused and doesn't know what else to do.

"Peeta, do you need some medicine," she whispers too him, looking towards the nurses desk.

Peeta shakes his head. "Please don't tell Katniss. I'll tell her on my own time. Please don't tell her. Please. She'll hate me for keeping this from her. Please. I can't have her hating me."

"She would never hate you, Peeta. That girl is over the moon about you. She doesn't talk much to me but I see it in her eyes," Ms. Everdeen smiles, rubbing a hand through Peetas curls, calming him as his cries decrease, his eyes losing the dazed look they had taken on.

"I'm sorry," he mumbles after awhile. "I should go. I'm no use to my mom here when I'm more upset than she is."

Ms. Everdeen shakes her head. "I think she just wants her family around."

So Peeta stays around.

...

Katniss is on his lap, her hand in his hair as she pulls him in for a kiss, her tongue sweeping over his bottom lip as she slowly grinds into the bulge forming in his pants. She pulls away to search his eyes, her eyebrows knitted in concern.

"You don't seem into this," she whispers, obviously defeated. "Is something wrong?"

Everything was wrong but Peeta says nothing. "I'm just tired," he lies.

"You've been tired for awhile now," she mumbles, crawling from his lap and crossing the room to grab ahold of her discarded shirt.

It was true. In the beginning weeks of summer, Peeta had been very distant, not just emotionally but physically as well. His body was having a hard time getting into the moment when his mind was a million other places.

"Is it me your tired of?" Katniss asks, turning to look at him from over her shoulder.

He shakes his head rapidly. "It's not you," he says. "It's me."

"Biggest cliche in the book Peeta, lord," she says. "You could've tried for something a little more creative."

"Where are you going?" He calls out as she disappears into his bathroom.

"Home," she calls back. "Obviously I'm not wanted here."

"Katniss don't be like that," he pleads, turning to open the door. It's locked. "Baby, come out."

She opens the door, her eyes red around the rims and puffy, her lips snagged between her own. "Don't baby me Peeta," she says, trying to hurl past him but Peeta is quicker.

"I've had a lot on my mind lately," he tells her, his hands running up her arms.

"Then talk to me about it," she pleads. "You just shut me out all the damn time Peeta and I'm-"

"My moms sick," he interrupts.

Katniss is quiet, her mouth dropping in horror as her eyes grow wide.

"Sick as in..."

"Sick as in cancer," he finishes for her. "We've known for about three weeks or so, I don't know. I didn't want to tell you."

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want one of our last summers together to be filled with depressing thoughts," he says. He realizes he just said "last summers". The thought hadn't occurred to him until now.

"But this is something major happening in your life. Don't I get to know about it?"

Peeta nods. "I didn't want you too worry."

Katniss says nothing else, just envelops Peeta within her arms and rocks him until she's content.

"She'll be okay."

...

His mother wasn't okay and that was evident.

The whole town now knew of her illness, the bakery being frequented by people who want to share their sorrows with the Mellark family. Peeta was used to all the sad words and stories people told as if his mother was already dead.

She had yet to lose her hair but she was already preparing for the day, having twenty wigs hand made and sent to the Mellark home.

...

Katniss comes over with Prim in mid June, a box in each of their hands as they step inside the large home, a shy smile on Prims face.

"What a present surprise," Peeta says, moving an arm around Katnisses waist to kiss her.

"Hold it, stud. We haven't come to see you," she says. "We've come to see your mother."

Almost reluctantly, Peeta shows them to her room, the room in which his mother refuses to leave, nervous about the curious eyes. When she sees the two girls, her face is at first cold. Cancer hadn't changed her quite yet.

"We've brought these for you," Prim says, holding the boxes out. If there is one thing Mrs. Mellark will not refuse, it is gifts and she opens them without another thought.

Inside are two hats, a knitted one that must be from Prim and then the other is a sun hat, the ones his mother wears to tea at the country club.

His mother smiles.

...

"Do you know what you're doing for college?" Katniss asks when their laid out by the lake, his car softly playing music from the local radio station.

Peeta looks over at her. It's the first time she has been the one to ask.

"I'm going to Penn State," he admits finally, knowing it would have to come out at some point. He had already verbally committed. His name would be in the news in a few weeks, just in time for his senior season. He would rather Katniss hear the words from him versus some nosey reporter.

She nods her head. "I know."

"You know?"

"Finnick told Annie he was going. I knew you would too. I was just making sure, I guess," she mumbles.

"It's not far away," he promises.

"It's pretty far away from Texas."

Peetas eyes flicker to hers. "You're going to Texas?"

She nods her head. "They offered me a full ride, loved my writing and essays. That's where they want me to go and my mother thinks it will be a great fit and..."

Peeta wants to be happy for her. He really does.

"Texas will be perfect for you," he says, reaching his hand out to twist into hers.

"You'll love Penn State," she says. "Come home with a pretty wife and an NFL career."

"I'm not coming home with a wife unless her name is Katniss Everdeen," he promises.

"Okay."

"So you'll allow it?"

Katniss nods. "I'll allow it."

Peeta smiles and counts the days in his head.

A year. That was all the time they had left in this town. A year would never be long enough in comparison to three they'd spent together.

But there was no one in this world he loved more than her, and he knew it. There would never be anyone but her. She had taught him to love to trust to grow as a person.

No, a year would never be long enough but that was what they had left.

The thought brought tears to his eyes.

* * *

I focused this chapter more on Peeta and his family versus the relationship between Peeta and his peers. I felt it would better drive the story and listen to me when I say this has to be my least favorite chapter. So if you were disappointed by the chapter, I apologize!

trying to decide now wether to take this through the college years or end it with the next chapters and maybe a thousand word epilogue. Please let me know which you would prefer to see!

Congratulations to the talented Jennifer Lawrence for the Oscar nomination!

-B


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

_"The sun has settled on the place that you loved. _

_Our minds are troubled with the __emptiness."_

_Senior Year: 17-18_

The music is loud, the drinks are flowing, and the heavy aroma of marijuana is heavy in the air. This can only mean one thing. Finnick Odiars "end of summer" bash.

As August was rolling to a close, so was the best summer of Peetas life. It had come to an end too soon as far as he was concerned and versus enjoying the festivities as his fellow classmates were, he's chosen to sulk and nurse the one beer he had poured himself. Everyone had long ago given up hope that he might move from his spot on Finnicks padded lawn chairs and moved on, leaving him alone.

Katniss still wasn't here. She was working the late shift at the car dealership, one of her last weeks of being an employee for the Hawthonres. Peeta couldn't be any happier. Gale was back from school and the less time she had to spend there, the better.

He shoots her one final pleading text, begging her to come and save him. Or at least endure it with him. He had sent the message thirty minutes ago and still hadn't received a reply. He sighs, putting the device back into the pocket of his solid colored swim trunks.

Delly plops down next to him after some time, making polite small talk about this and that and a whole bunch of things that Peeta doesn't care about. "Where's Katniss tonight?" She asks eventually.

Peeta shrugs. "Working at the Hawthornes until ten. She should be here soon," he says. It was nearing eleven and if she wasn't here in the next fifteen minutes, he would be sending out a search party without a second thought.

"It almost seems weird seeing you without seeing her."

It was weird. The two had been together for just about four years. Four long years and seeing one without the other was a rare occurrence. They were a pair, a team, the two of them. Peeta had no problems with the jokes his friends made to him about being "whipped". He was in love and at seventeen years old, he knew he had met the women he would marry. He would take the teasing for now.

When Katniss does finally make her arrival, she's dressed in the multi patterned dress she wears for special occasions, her hair down and a bit of makeup on her face. "Sorry I'm late," she says, sliding into his lap as his hands find her waist, his fingers massaging the hip bones.

"You're beautiful," he whispers, giving her a soft kiss on the lips. She blushes.

"You have to say that," she says. "If you didn't, you definitely wouldn't be getting any."

"Are you implying that I'm getting some tonight," Peeta teases, running his nose up and down her arms. She smells of honey. It becomes Peetas new favorite smell.

Katniss swats at his face playfully, moving her hands to move through the curls atop his head which were far longer than Peeta preferred. Football had really been kicking his ass this year and personal hygiene was just something that had slipped away from him as disgusting as it is. The only time he even remembered to shower was if Katniss was taking one with him. Which wasn't as often as he hope.

"Where's Finnick?" Katniss asks, her eyes scanning over the crowd.

She finds him, standing on the top of his parents glass table, not the wisest decision he's ever made. He bobs to the music, his eyes shut as he moves off beat, red cup raised high in the air. Katniss laughs and Peeta does too.

"We should go find our friends," she suggests. "We kind of look strange over here all alone."

Peeta would have to agree. The party had slowly gravitated away through the course of the night and the two were one of the few hiding in the shadows versus being in the crowd. People in Panem looked at this night as being the farewell to the senior class but there would be plenty of other instances they were together. Peeta knew that. If there was one thing they loved, it was parties. Parties and drinking but the two went hand in hand.

"But I want to spend tonight with you," Peeta complains, leaning in to kiss the skin on her neck. "I've been waiting all night for you to get here. I don't want to have to share you."

Katniss giggles, swatting his face away as she stands. She extends her arm to him. He takes it a moment later, groaning as he gets to his feet. He's been sitting for so long, his legs have fallen asleep and it takes him a moment to steady himself. He tries to blame it on the alcohol.

"Whoa there, partner," Katniss says, throwing an arm around his waist as she moves through the few people gathered around them. "What are you going to do without me?"

He didn't know. He really didn't fucking know.

Peetas friends all embrace Katniss with open arms, most of them so drunk they probably won't even remember her presence at the party once tomorrow morning rolls around.

"This guy has been a drag all fucking night," Johanna slurs. Everyone yells in agreement.

"Yeah, yeah, we get it. I'm no fun," Peeta pouts, mocking hurt as Katniss jabs at his ribs. When his eyes meet hers she sends him a small smile, the dimple on her left cheek making an appearance.

"Someone get this girl a drink," Finnick yells. Of course, within seconds, a million greedy hands offer her their own cups filled with things Peeta cannot even begin to imagine.

Katniss shakes her head from side to side, crossing her arms over her chest shyly. "I'm not drinking tonight. Who's going to drive all you guys home?"

Everyone nods in agreement finishing off their own cups. They all knew this night would end in everyone sleeping in the empty rooms in Finnicks house, maybe a few making it back to Peetas if that got to hectic. It always seemed to end up this way. Peeta didn't mind as long as Katniss ended up in his bed.

Finnick proposes a toast, raising his glass high within the air and calling everyone to attention.

"To senior year, mother fuckers."

...

Peeta rouses before the rest that Sunday morning, making sure everyone was safe enough to drive before distributing keys back into the pockets of his friends who lied on the carpeted floor, snoring and drooling as morning turned to afternoon.

Katniss had left long before the sun had risen, telling him she needed to get home to Prim. She was never supposed to stay at anyones house after a party. Not because Ms. Everdeen wouldn't let her but because she didn't want Prim waking up to any empty home like she did most days. She had left in a rush, clothes from the night before in hand, Peetas button up covering her naked body, and with a brisk kiss on the cheek before disappearing into the early morning sunrise.

Oh how Peeta loved the sunrise.

He wondered if it would be the same in Pennsylvania. If it would feel the same there.

His brothers had promised him he would love college but the closer and closer he gets to leaving his home, the worse he feels. He wants to run and hide and lock himself in his room. He doesn't want to leave this place anymore and it is all because of Katniss. Before her, he had been itching for release.

His mother had told him to stop letting his heart lead the way and she was right. His mind told him there was nothing better in the world than going to Penn State to play, leaving this place behind and never looking back. Though his parents did well, he didn't want to turn out like them. He was never destined to turn out like them.

On nights when he lets his heart control his mind, he just has to keep reminding himself that he is doing this for Katniss. And that Katniss won't be here either. She'll be in Texas, leaving all memories of Panem in the dust and replacing them with new ones she'll be making in Austin.

Peeta only hopes he isn't left in the dust.

...

Mrs. Mellark is better.

The cancer is almost gone, the chemo doing it's job though the stress from her having to lose her hair bringing her to tears almost every night. She often wears the hats Katniss and Prim made for her.

Peeta thinks this gesture may have done something to turn around her feelings towards the girls because he no longer hears about the "Seam trash" he lets in the house. His mother is still not pleasant towards Katniss but she has reverted to at least calling her by her first name.

You must take the small victories.

The doctors can almost promise the Mellark men that their mother will not die, at least not from the cancer, any time soon. Peeta is happy about this. He did not want his mother to die. He did not want his father to spend the rest of his life alone consumed with grief from her passing.

She would be okay for now and that is all that mattered.

"We have to take it one day at a time," Katniss had told him after he'd told her the news, sending him confident smiles. She often reports to him things her mother says, medical terms and common knowledge. She helps a lot, supports him even in times when he doesn't need it but that is just Katniss and he loves her for it.

He loves her for a lot of things.

...

The downpour that falls from the sky can only mean one thing and it means the gods are angry. Angry about something and playing football in this type of weather can be no good for anyone.

But the season is fast approaching and Coach Abernathy has new plans for the team, new ways the boys can improve and a little rain isn't going to stop him from putting these things in motion. Peeta doesn't know what has gotten the man so inspired but within the few weeks the new season had begun, he had seen a vast difference in the mans coaching style. He didn't mind it but it was a little strange.

As Peeta runs the last forty on the muddy field, his legs feel as though their about to give out. He hears yelling. If the yelling is for him, he doesn't know but the loud sound of thunder just about drowns it out. When Peeta gains enough energy to move his head a fraction of an inch, it is Finnick who is getting laid into.

"Looks like we'll run it again," Coach Abernathy yells over the roar of disapproval. Peeta braces himself and runs again, runs like his life depends on it until he is on the other side, Finnick wheezing to his left.

"I drink too much for this shit," he says, hands on his knees as he empties his stomach onto the ground. Some of the players groan in disgust, a few of the coaches even try to convince the man they've had enough by now.

"Do you boys want to win on Friday?" Coach Abernathy yells out, clapping his hands in unison. A few of the boys do the same and soon, the whole team joins in, creating a thunder equally as loud. "That's what I like to hear!"

"The only way we're winning this thing is if we start playing like a team, practicing like a team, living our lives as a team, you boys understand?" He continues, slapping a few helmets around.

"Yes sir!" The team yells together.

"If Mellark here is having happy time with his girlfriend, then we all are!"

Peeta doesn't necessarily like this statement but it seems to rile the team up. He says nothing about it, lets everyone enjoy their happiness.

"Now lets go kick some ass!"

...

All the boys decide to go to a little diner in town after practice, in no rush to get home being all of their girlfriends were spending the day with each other doing god knows what.

They'd been coming to Saes since they were children, ordering the same grilled cheese and chocolate shake combination for almost a decade now. Though their time here had dwindled drastically through the years, the boys are welcomed with open arms when they walk through the doors.

"Well look at this. The Boy Wonders decided to grace us with their presence," Ellen, the waitress who's worked here before even Peetas parents had been born, calls. She hugs each of the boys.

"Couldn't help ourselves. A grilled cheese and chocolate milkshake sounded just too good to pass up," Finnick explains, kissing the elderly women on the cheek.

Their usual booth is empty, the one in the near back by the window. It's large enough to fit all the boys but they pull two chairs up for good measure.

"Well I'll get those started for you," she says before disappearing.

"Would you do her?" Finnick asks, motioning towards Ellen who, at the very least, is pushing sixty-five.

"You've hit an all time low, Finn," Marvel says.

"Can't argue with that," Thresh agrees.

Thom and Peeta stay silent because it seems the point has gotten across. Finnick just shrugs his shoulders, wiping pieces of sweaty hair away from his face. Even now, the boy is handsome in every aspect of the word. Though Peeta had done well enough for himself in the looks department, sitting next to his best friend still made him self conscience.

"I'd bang her if I was her age," he says.

"You wouldn't be able to get it up if you were her age you nasty fuck. Jesus, Finn," Peeta says, nodding to the young bus boy who graces them each with waters they had not asked for. Peeta recognizes the kid, scrawny, his hair curler than it should be. He must play football, maybe on the freshman team but Peeta can't place him.

"Thanks Josh," Thom tells the kids, fist bumping him as he scurries away from the table to wash down one that has previously been vacated.

Ellen brings their sandwiches and milkshakes and midway through the meal Peeta realizes all the dairy was obviously a mistake. His stomach is having a hard time handling the foods and from the frowns on his friends faces, he knows they feel the same way. He has been so used to living off of protein bars and stale bread for the past month and a half, actual food is unsettling.

"I gotta shit," Cato mumbles, his feet not carrying him fast enough as he moves to the bathroom. Marvel follows not to long after, mumbling something about throwing up. Peeta, Thom, Thresh, and Finnick manage to keep their meal down, at least for the time being.

"You seem worried, Finn," Thresh comments a moment later.

Looking at his friend, Peeta can tell instantly that something is, in fact, worrying him. The line between his eyebrows has been permanently etched into his face, making him reflect a man years older than the boy that sits before him.

"It's just Annie, man," Finnick tells them honestly, waiting until Cato and Marvel return from their bathroom fiasco to jump into the story.

They had sex for the first time just a few nights ago according to Finnick. It was great, it was wonderful, it was picture perfect. But now she won't speak to him. Won't answer his calls, won't text him back, and the only reason he even knows where she is now is for the fact that Katniss had spilled the beans that Annie would be with them today.

"Did you hurt her?" Marvel asks.

"Well, yeah. It was her first time," he answers. Peeta knows it was also his first time but he will spare him the embarrassment. He was surprised Finnick waited this long but was almost proud of him all the same.

"Did you use protection?" Thom inquiries.

"Of course. I'm not fucking stupid."

The boys are stumped about her behavior. They have been dating for a good two years. If she had been worried about Finnick running, he would have done it by now.

They finish their lunch and go separate ways, all agreeing to do something before the start of school in two days. Truthfully, all the boys will be catching up on their rest being they haven't been able to catch a wink of sleep in the past few weeks between the endless amount of parities and long hours of football.

Peeta and Finnick drive in silence as Finnick rolls to a stop outside the Mellark home, turning the cars engine off before turning to his friend with lost eyes.

"What did I do man?" He asks, his voice breaking.

"I don't know, Finn. Maybe she's just tired or something," Peeta tells him, trying his best to console his friend. But really, Peeta knows whatever is happening cannot be good. Hiding after sex can only mean one thing after all.

"Will you talk to Katniss?"

Peeta agrees without hesitation.

...

"I need to ask you something," Peeta says on the phone with Katniss a few days later, his feet propped up on his cherry wood desk that never had an really use.

"Okay. Shoot," she says on the other end.

"What did Finnick do to Annie?"

"What do you mean?"

"She won't call him back and they had sex and now she's the one acting all weird. I mean, if anybody was going to run it was going to be Finnick and he didn't and now..."

Peeta had ever been one to gossip but the look in Finnicks eyes told him this is something he would, for once, have to do. His friend rarely asked for anything other than the occasional ride home and he couldn't deny him of his one request. Besides, he liked Finnick and Annie a whole lot more together than he did apart.

"Wait. They had sex?" Katniss questions, her voice going up at the end.

Peetas eyebrows crease together. "Yeah. At least that's what Finnick said and I don't think he would be lying."

The other end of the phone goes silent, leaving Peeta alone with all his clouded thoughts as he sits in his chair, his eyes staring at the dark screen.

He shoots Katniss a text asking if everything is alright.

She assures him everything is fine.

...

A week into senior year and Peeta had been in actual classes for a little over three hours.

He was rarely needed to actually show up to school. All his requirements were long gone which meant he spent the majority of his day alone, sometimes on the field if Marvel or Cato had the same off period, but mostly lounging about at home with his brothers until they, too, left to go back to school.

His signing day was coming up, much sooner than he had anticipated. In a few days time he would be on the phone with the recruitment staff at Penn State giving his verbal commitment. A few months after that all the papers would be sign, sealed, and delivered.

All the Penn State merchandise arrives one Thursday, boxes full of hats and shirts and jackets. His mother had ordered by the butt load, knowing a lot of reporters would be on the lawn and school premises in the weeks following. She decides they would even sell things at the bakery to promote business.

Peeta shifts through the things, finding a few shirts he'll keep in his own private stash and a hat or two that will most likely go unworn.

He tugs on the navy shirt, the logo across his chest. He stares in the mirror.

Yes. He could get used to this.

...

"Will you read some of my poetry?" Katniss asks one day as their sprawled out across her room, him with his history book in hand and her scribbling in the leather journal. He looks up from reading about the War of 1812, his eyes pinching together.

"You want me to read what you've written?" He asks in disbelief. He had tried countless times to gain permission to read the neat little words she writes inside her diary. Every time, he had been denied access. But it seems today would be different.

"Actually, I want you to read something I'm writing for college. It's for a scholarship I'm applying for and I wanted to know what you thought about it," she says, pulling free a package of notes from the cover of her journal, handing them to him. There beaten and worn and Peeta can barely make out the words on the sheet but he manages just fine.

What he reads is a story about his mother. About a women with a love for material things but that lives without love for those who love her. About a young boy who wants so much from life but no longer feels the pain and rejection from his mother. A boy who doesn't cry for forgiveness any longer but in different towards such things. A boy who is the most kind and loving and gentle person on the world.

Peeta rereads the words countless times, not being able to grasp the concept until almost half an hour has passed in silence.

"I love this Katniss," he whispers finally, his hand reaching for hers.

"I didn't know if I was overstepping my boundaries writing that. I am just the girlfriend," she says.

"You are not just the girlfriend," Peeta disagrees, shaking his head from side to side. He realizes only when her hands still his that he is shaking. From what, he doesn't know.

"I wanted to write about something personal but when I tried to write about losing my father, I found it hard to do. I was to young to put into words what I felt. When I tried writing about it I felt disconnected from it all. Like it was no longer my experience," she tells him.

"I'm sorry, Katniss," Peeta apologizes.

"I'm sorry too," she says.

They both have a lot to be sorry about but yet, as they stare at one another, they don't feel sorry for each other.

"What happened to your father?" Peeta asks. It's a conversation they've never had before. Not when she cries in his arms on the anniversary of her fathers death or when she gets so angry at her mother she can't speak. Peeta just knows he's gone and that was good enough until now.

"Mining accident," she tells him simply.

Peeta doesn't ask for anymore details and she offers up no more.

"I miss him a lot," she says.

Peeta selfishly realizes, if her father were still here he would not have her. He would never know a girl like Katniss Everdeen existed and feels grateful for this moment, grateful for the fates. But then he feels sick for thinking such things.

"I wish I could make it better," Peeta says, pulling her to his body.

"You do. Everyday."

...

The day the recruiter calls to get a verbal commitment, Peeta can barely utter the words over the phone, his parents anxious eyes on him as he mouth flops like a fish out of water.

"Peeta?" The man asks, growing impatient at the boys resistance.

"Yes," he finally croaks, his voice catching at the end. "Yes."

"Great to have you. We'll have a heck a season with you and your friends from Panem, boy."

...

Katniss somehow manages to fit two hundred people into her backyard the next night after the football game to celebrate the boys signing.

The house has been decorated with an insane amount of navy blue, Penn State logos hanging all around the room, multicolored M&Ms in bowls all around the house. Katniss had surely outdone herself on this one and Peeta would be sure to thank her later.

He arrives to the party about two hours later than the rest of town, having to shower after the game and grab a quick bite to eat with the team. After all, partying on an empty stomach was never a good idea. Peeta had learned that lesson his freshman year.

He finds Katniss immediately, her silhouette moving from room to room as she does her best to host. She had tried her best to make the home look bigger, moving the furniture to sit comfortably against a wall. The house was still too small for the number of people in attendance. Peeta had offered to host the party but his girlfriend was as stubborn as ever.

"Hey," he says, grabbing her by the waist and pulling her to the side. She looks frazzled, her in a halo around her head, the bags under her eyes undeniable. She was doing too much for him, more than was really needed but what else had he expected from her.

"So the guests of honor decide to arrive," Katniss jokes, pecking him on the cheek, leaving a stain of red chap stick on his cheek. "Good game, baby."

Peeta smiles, shrugging his shoulders. It was an easy win but that was to be expected with three Division 1 prospects running one offense. "Well you are my good luck charm," he mumbles, pressing yet another kiss to her lips. "You don't look like you're having very much fun."

Katniss laughs humorlessly. "Is it that obvious?"

"It's just as much your night as it is mine," he says.

"Of course it's not Peeta. I threw this party for you," she says. "Annie and Johanna were supposed to be helping me but the two are already wasted so I got stuck with all the hostess duties."

Peetas eyes scan for the two women. He finds them sitting on the couch, laughing loudly at something Marvel says. Finnick is no where to be seen and Peeta hasn't seen Thresh since half time.

"I'll help you. What do you need help with?" Peeta offers, moving on her tail as she bustles about the kitchen, stopping only to give polite small talk to some people. Peeta brushes off the hands and words of encouragement. Those can wait till later.

"Peeta, please. Enjoy your night," Katniss pleads, refilling the already empty bowl of chips with another gallon sized bag. Greedy hands reach for it immediately.

"But I'm not going to enjoy this night unless you are," he whines, grabbing ahold of her arm to still her, even if it is just for a moment. Katniss rolls her eyes, throwing her braid over her shoulder and attaching her lips to his for another quick kiss.

"Come find me later. I have something I think you'll find."

...

It's three in the morning when Peeta finally manages to get everyone who is not welcome to stay in the Everdeen house out of the door. Everyone wants to talk about football and the game and this and that and Peeta had no time for it. Not now. Not when his girlfriend had told him to "come find" her.

The gang is already passed out in the living room, Katniss already preparing the makeshifts cots they'll sleep on for the night. He leaves them all silently, tip toeing around Johanna who is groaning in her sleep and Finnick whose eyes are beginning to flutter. The last thing he needs is anyone else trying to force him into conversation.

The light in Katnisses room is on and he watches for a moment as her feet dance across the floor before entering, knocking on the door frame once. The dress she wore for the party sits in the corner, long discarded as well as the heels she had chosen for the night much to Peetas surprise. He had spent a good hour and a half just watching her long legs move back and forth as she walked across the expanse of her house, the muscles in her legs clenching with every step.

"That better be you, Peeta," she says, her back still to him as she finishes preparing for bed.

"Who else would it be?" He replies, taking two long steps to cross her room, grabbing her by the waist and wrestling her to the bed, his lips making their way to her neck as she giggles. "What do you have for me?"

Her eyes spark up at the reminder, her hands going to his chest to still his movements. She swings her legs around him, moving off the bed and disappearing into her closet for privacy.

Peeta waits patiently, his thumbs twirling around each other, his eyes watching the shadow behind the doors. Not being able to see her only added to the excitement.

"Are you ready?" Katniss calls after awhile, her shadow stilling for a moment.

Peeta nods his head rapidly. "I was born ready."

She laughs before pulling open the door to her closet, stepping out in a Penn State jersey. One two sizes to big for her small frame. It settled at mid thigh.

Peeta can't keep the smile off of his face as he watches his girlfriend twirl, motioning to the back and that's when he sees his name printed across the it. "Had to stick with the theme," Katniss explains. "I had got it for you for Christmas but Johanna and Annie convinced me I had to show it to you tonight."

"They were right," he mumbles, his hands grabbing anxiously at her waist. She falls on top of him, her mouth sliding over his as her tongue makes its way inside his mouth, massaging the inside of his cheeks.

When her hands move to the bottom to discard the jersey, Peetas hand grab onto them, stilling her. "As much as I love seeing you naked I would really like to fuck you with this on," he moans against her as she moves her pelvis against his.

"Well then lets make that happen," Katniss mumbles, working down the slacks he wears. He moves his hips up to help her discard of his boxer shorts, his erection springing free and biting the cold air in her room. He bites his tongue to keep from moaning to loudly when she moves over him. Of course there is nothing underneath.

She sinks down onto him, taking a few moments just grind against him when they are connected at the hilt, her eyes falling shut as she moves faster and faster against him, stimulating her own clit. She brings herself to an orgasm this way, her walls tightening around him before she starts moving up and down.

Peetas eyes close, his hands clawing at the jersey. "Can we stay like this forever?" He asks before he can realize what he's saying.

She laughs, her cheeks reddening but the laugh quickly turns into a moan when Peetas fingers find her already sensitive clit yet again. God, he wishes they could stay like this forever.

Katniss finishes for a second time, chanting his name like a prayer as her hips buck over his, bringing him to his own orgasm as he gasps for air.

The two of them lazily kiss each other for a long time after, lying on top of one another, Peeta still inside her warm walls. This was also the perk of no longer using condoms. Peeta didn't have to run to the bathroom right after such a beautiful moment.

"I really liked my gift," Peeta says finally, swinging her over him so she can lay on the side of the bed that has easily become "her" side of the bed.

"I think I'm going to have to keep it," she says after awhile, her eyes closing as sleep threatens to take her under. "They'll be a million more like it once you actually get there."

"This will forever be my favorite one."

"And it'll always be with me."

...

Mrs. Odiar baits the boys into raking the leaves that the fall weather has caused to fall from the trees, staining her yard which she takes such pride in. "When you two make it to the NFL and can afford to pay people to do these types of things, then maybe I'll consider turning the reigns over to someone else," she told the boys, supplying them with all the same things she had since they were children.

Peeta and Finnick didn't mind the chore. It had almost become a tradition of sorts.

The two work for a good three hours before deciding they've done a fine job, their feet aching and hands sore. The yard looks nice, much better than before. They plop down on law chairs, Peeta craning his head back, surely feeling the hit from last nights game now.

"I think the hardest thing is going to be leaving this place," Finnick says after a while, his eyes making their way up and down the block. The neighborhood he and Peeta had grown up in. Their home.

"You're telling me," Peeta agrees, his eyes landing on Mrs. Dawny's house, the sweet old lady who now lives alone. Her husband died some time after Peeta turned thirteen, the first person this place had ever seen go. He makes a mental note to go visit her before he leaves for college. Make sure she got that drain fixed like she promised she would. He'll have to remind his father to go check on her once a week being Peeta won't be able to do it any longer.

"But Penn State will be an adventure, that's for sure," he says.

Peeta nods his head. That it would be.

"Did you ever talk to Katniss about Annie?" Finnick inquiries.

"I did. She didn't tell me anything though, man," Peeta says, recalling the rather awkward phone conversation the two had.

"Girls are a fucking mystery. I don't understand them," Finnick explains. "Because at your party, Annie practically jumps me in the center of Katnisses living room but the next morning, I wasn't allowed to touch her when she left. I'm baffled."

"Maybe you talk in your sleep," Peeta suggests. "Or maybe she was drunk and forgot she was mad at you."

"But what is she mad at me for, Peeta? That is the question at hand here."

Peeta shrugs.

"It's like they have their own language."

...

When Peeta arrives Monday morning for film, he finds Coach Abernathy asleep in his office in the school. His head on his desk, his water bottle in hand.

Peeta hesitates a moment before entering, shaking the man slightly to wake him. The Coach jumps with a start, swinging his arms around wildly as if under attack. Peeta dodges him with ease, grabbing ahold of his arms in an attempt to calm him but this only seems to rile him up more.

He begins screaming, yelling things that Peeta cannot understand and landing kicks and punches until he seems to get his mind back, his eyes losing their glazed expression and his arms finally falling to his sides with a thud. He tips his head in Peetas direction as if studying the boys face, his eyebrows knitting together time and time again until, finally, he sits in his chair relaxed.

Peeta says nothing, just stands in the corner of the room waiting for invitation or an apology or something. He chances a look over his shoulder, glad no one is here to his antics. Surely, if anyone had seen this but Peeta, it would be the talk of the town, make the Coach even more of a joke than he already is. Peeta didn't want that.

"What are you doing sneaking up on me like that boy?" He says, rubbing his eyes.

"I'm sorry," Peeta apologizes. "Film starts in a little while and I just wondered if maybe you'd want to show up, talk to us about the plays and what not."

Coach Abernathy nods his head, his eyes shut as he bobs up and down. Peeta knows this all too familiar look. Is the man drunk?

"Or maybe you'd want to sit this one out, Coach," Peeta says.

"Now why would I do that Mellark?" He growls.

"You seem... You seem a little drunk coach," Peeta tells him honestly.

"How would you know what being drunk look likes, boy?"

Peeta stays silent, not wanting to get himself or any of his friend in trouble.

"Thank you for waking me up," he says. "Don't sneak up on me like that though. You're lucky I wasn't sleeping with my knife tonight."

Peeta eyebrows knit together. "Why do you sleep with a knife?" He asks. "If you don't mind me asking."

The coach doesn't answer for awhile, busying himself in cleaning his already clean desk, his eyes traveling back and forth between Peeta and the boys that were beginning to gather outside of his office slowly.

"I had a mother a lot like yours," he says slowly.

Peeta says nothing.

"A father too. I had a rough life," he says.

That would make sense of it all. Of all the drinking and sleeping and anger. Would Peeta end up this way too? No. Coach Abernathy had said his father was the same way. Mr. Mellark was much more patient, nicer, genuine than his own mother.

"I'm sorry about that Coach," Peeta says after a tense moment. "Film does start in about twenty minutes though."

"A nice way to say, get your shit together," he mumbles, mostly to himself. "Didn't hit you, did I boy?"

No. He hadn't. The old man is much to slow for Peeta. He shakes his head.

"Good."

...

Peeta arrives to his shift at the bakery twenty minutes earlier than usual, mostly because Katniss was busy this afternoon and no football meant he had nothing to do.

He sits by himself in the back for the majority of his time there, checking and rechecking the breads in the oven, talking to a few customers who come in. Most don't buy anything and just come in for the company.

An old man named Leroy and his wife, Roselyn, come in for awhile, talk to Peeta about football though the times have changed so much, Leroy doesn't even know what he is talking about. They laugh and joke and share tips on relationships.

"You always agree with what she says," Roselyn says with a smile, patting her husbands knee. "I don't know how else we would've been married for so long."

Peeta smiles, looking to the old bald man rolling his eyes but nodding his head. "I think I've already learned that one," Peeta admits.

"Trust me, you haven't. It took me thirty-five years to learn it," Leroy says, finishing off the tea Peeta had prepared for the two.

When Peetas father arrives half an hour later, the couple leaves, bidding farewell to the oldest Mellark and the youngest, promising to come back soon.

When the bell above the door rings, alerting everyone to their departure, Mr. Mellark turns to Peeta with sad eyes. "Roselyn has got dementia. It's early enough to try and off set it but Leroy brings her here everyday. It calms her nerves in some way."

Peeta nods his head, remembering something one of their granddaughters had told him so time ago. He had forgotten and speaking to them now, he never would've known. But no one would've ever known about his mother had she not broadcast it around the town.

"She seems good," Peeta tells his father.

He nods. "Good days and bad days but then again, isn't that all of us?"

"How's mom today?" Peeta asks.

"Better," he says. "She has a doctors appointment tomorrow. Hopefully one of the last ones. Since the twins aren't here, we were really hoping you'd go."

"I would but we have a game this Friday and coach is gonna ride my ass if I don't show up to practice," Peeta explains. Really, it's that he doesn't want to go.

The tone in his fathers voice tells him he understands this. "You know, you only get one mom, Peeta."

And maybe that is why Peeta was so angry. You only get one mother and he got stuck with one that was to angry about her own life to happy about anyone elses. She was sick, he understood that. But she was getting better.

It angered him that people like Roselyn weren't. Sweet people. People who looked after their children, loved their children. Not that he would ever wish his mother dead. He just wanted no more pity from anyone, not for her.

He shrugs out of his work apron, says goodnight to his father, and speeds home.

...

Next Saturday, Katniss calls him in a fit of tears, breathing labored and words streamed together as if she couldn't get them out fast enough. He has to ask her multiple times to explain the dilemma to him before he fully understands her words.

"My mother promised Prim for the hundredth time she would take her dress shopping for a dress to wear to her middle school dance and now she's alone at the mall because my mother forgot. Can you believe that Peeta? A mother forgot about her child," she screams. From the way her voice echoes he knows she's at work.

Peeta lets her vent for another ten minutes before getting in the car and letting his heart take him down the road.

...

He finds Prim in the shoe shop, trying on a million different pairs of heels that are much to big for someone her age, her hair in a braid and a bag swung around her shoulders. When she sees him, he isn't greeted with the warm smile he usually, just a cold distant stare.

"What are you doing here, Peeta," she says, her voice low. She's embarrassed, that much he knows.

"I was in the area," Peeta lies, playing into the Everdeens pride for the sake of getting somewhere with the girl.

She doesn't buy it, busying herself in trying on a pair of plain black flats that fit her feet perfectly, make her look more mature but still like a young girl. Peeta would approve of these. The pumps in the other box would be vetoed.

"You don't have to stay here with me, Peeta. I can take care of myself," Prim says, turning around to place all the boxes back on the neatly placed shelf, turning on her heel and stalking out of the shop with her head down.

Peeta gives a heavy sigh before following her out of the store. "Prim, would you just wait?" He calls after her.

"No Peeta. Leave me alone," she says, his persistence only making her move faster. She's a good twenty feet away from him, her blonde hair blowing in the wind as she nearly breaks into a jog to avoid him. Peeta isn't that easily discouraged and keeps up easily with her, his long legs taking him much farther than hers.

When Peeta is finally within distance, he grabs ahold of her arm, pulling her to his side like a parent restraining a child. At least that is what it appeared to be from the inside out. "I don't know why you're running from me."

"I said to leave me alone!" Prim shouts, drawing some attention to them. "I just wanted to be left alone. I don't need you to be here."

"No one said you did," Peeta says. "I just saw you and thought you could use some company."

"Right," Prim scoffs, rolling her eyes. "So an hour after I call my sister, you show up unexpectedly. You two are very bad liars."

Peeta breaks, shrugging before swinging an arm around her, pulling her close to him. "She was just trying to be a good sister, Prim. You can't fault her for that."

"And what were you being? A good samaritan?"

"A good brother," Peeta exclaims.

Prim smiles. Well almost.

"So how about that dress?"

...

"So what about this one?" Prim asks, spinning widely in a white lace dress that is much to short for Peetas liking.

They had been at this for hours, searching every store in the mall high and low for something appealing and appropriate for Prims school dance next week. She hadn't found anything and everything Peeta suggested, "made her want to die". Peeta never had any sisters and after the three hours he had already spent with Prim, he was almost happy he didn't.

If only he had a dollar for every eye roll he had received.

"This is useless. There is nothing here," she huffs in exasperation, sitting on the elevated fitting area, crossing her arms over one another, her lip coming out to pout.

Peeta raises his eyebrows, at a loss for words because, truly, there was nothing here the girl liked.

"Maybe if we just go back to Macys..."

"No, Peeta!" She yells, throwing her hands up to run through the hair she had pulled from it's elastic. It "made the outfit" she'd said.

"Prim, tell me what you want to do and we'll do it. I can't read your mind though so you may want to get a move on giving me hints," he says. When she offers up no explanation, he continues. "I really did like the blue dress before. It was pretty."

Peeta also says this because it seemed to be her favorite. He hadn't seen her smile until she stepped out in the blue number. Peeta had made the mistake of telling her it was "cute" which was obviously the wrong choice of words because a moment later, she stalked back into the dressing room, throwing the fabric over the door and screaming.

"That's the thing, Peeta. I don't need to be pretty. I need to be beautiful, radiant, breathtaking," she explains, clapping her hands together, her eyes growing big after each new word.

Peeta couldn't imagine the younger sister of his girlfriend ever being anything but pretty but it seemed she had different plans.

Peeta shrugs. "Really, Prim. It's a school dance. No one will really care once the drinks start flowing," he jokes.

"I'm in eighth grade, Peeta. No drinks are going to start flowing, oh my goodness."

"Yeah, that may have been the wrong choice of-"

"Besides, everyone will care what I wear. I never have anything nice like those other kids. I need something to knock him off his feet," she explains.

"Him?" Peeta asks with an eyebrows raised.

"I said them," she backtracks.

"You did not. You said 'him'."

"I did not."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Prim."

"Fine," she cries after awhile. "Rory Hawthorne asked me to the dance and if Rue is telling me the truth, then he wants to kiss me when all is said and done but he will not want to kiss me if I don't look good!"

Peetas eyes go wide under her confession, the reality of what she has just said setting in and putting the boy at a loss for words.

Prim? Prim and a boy? Rory Hawthorne at that. The Everdeens had a bad reputation with the Hawthorne clan and Peeta wasn't all too sure he liked what he was hearing. He wasn't sure Katniss would like it much either but he is sure she doesn't know about her little sisters secret romance.

When Peeta finally pulls himself together, Prim is on the verge of tears.

"Prim, he soothes, "I'm sure Rory would want to kiss you if you were only wearing a paper bag. Wether or not he likes the dress won't matter."

Her eyes light up. "You think?"

Peeta nods his head, watching as she bends down to take ahold of the now wrinkled blue dress in her hands. "I did really like this dress," she says.

"Well then, lets wrap it up and take it home!"

"It'll have to wait," Prim says quietly. "My mother was going to pay and I couldn't possibly afford this. It's almost fifty dollars."

Peeta is silent for a moment. "It's no problem Prim. I'll pay for it," he says. Fifty dollars would do him no harm to bring her so much joy. He would spend twice that if it meant seeing the girl smile for once.

She shakes her head from side to side rapidly. "I could never impose on you, Peeta. You already do so much. It's fine, really. I'll just put it on hold and-"

But before she has time to give details of her plan, Peeta has pulled the cash from his wallet and handed it to the sales women who wears a big smile on her perfectly made-up face.

When all is said and done, Prim is so happy she cries.

...

"I am sorry about your mother not being able to come today," Peeta says.

The two sit in his car outside the Everdeen home, eating the ice creams they'd purchased from the Dairy Queen on the corner. This had been Prims treat after a lot of begging.

Prim shrugs, bringing the frozen milk to her lips. "I'm used to it, I guess."

"You shouldn't be used to it, Prim," Peeta mumbles.

"No. But I am. That is just the way things have been since dad died," Prim whispers, her eyes downcast at her lap, the plastic that sits on it encasing her dress.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything," Peeta says. "Your mother works hard for your family, no one can say any different."

"So does yours but does that make it any better?"

Do the nice things Peeta has in his home make up for the way his mother treats him? No. But he can't let Prim think this way. He cannot let her end up bitter and mad and angry because she would become no one but their mothers if she did that.

"Thank you for today, Peeta. I really do appreciate you taking the time to be with me today," Prim says after awhile, unbuckling her seat belt and rattling around in her purse for her key. When she finds it, she takes a moment to throw her arms around Peetas neck, hugging him for a long time before pulling away.

"I really hope you marry my sister one day and become my real brother," she tells him.

Then she disappears into the house.

...

Katniss doesn't come to school that Thursday.

When Peeta calls to check on her, Ms. Everdeen tells him she's contracted the flu.

"She'll just have to stay home for the rest of the week, I think. I have to go to work or else I would stay with her but-"

"I'll come over," Peeta offers without even thinking, already walking towards the parking lot to retrieve his car though he could easily walk there.

Ms. Everdeen thanks him rather than trying to talk the boy into staying at school.

He shoots his dad a text telling him where he'll be, Finnick to because there is no use having everyone in fear when the quarterback is not at school the day before a game. His father tells him it's fine. Finnick tells him he's an idiot.

The door is unlocked when Peeta arrives, Ms. Everdeen leaving detailed instructions atop the fridge about medicines and food and fluids. She leaves a mask out for Peeta to wear but it is no use. If he too gets the flu, so be it.

Katniss is asleep when he knocks on the door to her room, a towel on her forehead and a cup of water on her bed side table. Her lips are chapped and breaking, her skin tired and sweaty as Peeta runs a hand over her bare skin, rousing her slowly from her sleep as she blinks her eyes open.

"Peeta," she says surprised, sitting up in bed but falling down a moment later, the energy it takes to sit up not available to her. "What are you doing here?"

"I've come to take care of you," he explains, holding up the note. "Your mom answered the phone when I called and there was no talking me out of coming to take care of you."

"But you have practice," she whispers.

"I can miss one," he says.

"Not before a game, you can't," she tells him.

"I promise you, it'll be okay."

She doesn't believe him but says no more, reaching for her glass of water before shutting her eyes again, inviting Peeta to nap with her. He doesn't complain but doesn't get much sleep, his mind only shutting off for a moment before being alerted back to life. Mostly by her rapid temperature that won't break.

The day passes quickly, Katniss mostly coming in and out of sleep while Peeta dozes off now and again or watches Sports Center from her bed. When Prim arrives home from school, he leaves, kissing Katniss on the cheek and promising to call.

He goes to football practice because he knows coach will have his ass if he doesn't.

...

Mrs. Mellark decides she wants the family to go to her home town for the Thanksgiving holidays, flying all of the boys out too some place in Iowa where she grew up to have dinner in his grandparents nursing homes.

Both are still around, thankfully, but they aren't much for conversation anymore unless his grandfather is hurling racist comments at every person who walks by.

It's unenjoyable, even with his brothers there and Peeta longs to be back home in Panem with his beautiful girlfriend which he can't stop talking about. His grandmother takes him back to her room after dinner, showing him all the love letters his grandfather had written for her in the early years of their relationships.

She shows him pictures and news clippings and gifts they'd given each other over the years. "They never said we'd make it but sixty-three years later and look at us!" She says, her missing teeth making it hard to understand the words she's saying. Peeta manages and offers her a smile.

"You know what, Peter," she says, never really being able to get his name right. "I want to give you something to give to this Katherine."

Peeta laughs, choosing not to correct her and following her over to her chestnut closet.

"I want you to look at this on your sixty-third anniversary and remember your granny."

She pulls out a silver ring, one with no engravings or markings. Just a ring.

She gives him a toothless smile before wrapping his hand around the thing.

"Make it a promise."

...

He keeps the ring at the bottom of his sock drawer for safe keeping.

...

The gym is decorated in navy and silver, streamers hanging from every inch of the place, balloons around a handful of chairs as the three walk in, Peeta, Thresh, and Finnick, all dressed in identical blue polos, smiles on their faces.

They've conjured up quite an audience, the town being so small that three boys leaving to a big college is a big accomplishment. Their families sit in the front row, smiling and waving their hands excitedly as the boys mount the makeshift stage.

Peetas brothers are here, just for the weekend and smile happily at him, truly excited for their little brother. Mr. and Mrs. Mellark sit beside them, smiling slightly at him as he sits in his seat.

Coach Abernathy says a little about each boy, no more about one than the others and takes a second to recognize the families and their hard work and their commitment. He jokes a little about Finnick and makes a comment about Katniss, nothing more than that before he's handing the boys pens.

Peeta looks down at the piece of paper, the one with so much writing he has a hard time understanding the words. But he isn't looking down at a piece of paper, he's looking down at his future. His future that is just asking for him to scribble his name on the little line provided.

He finds his fathers eyes in the crowd, looking for the nod he receives after a good play. He gets it today. Then to his brothers who motion for him to go. Then to his mother who chews on her lip. Then he finds Katniss in the back of the room, smiling brightly next to Annie and Johanna who clap excitedly. She gives him the most breathtaking smile.

And then he signs his name, Peeta Mellark, on the name provided without a second thought.

Now it's official.

...

"I've got to say, it's a good day to be your girlfriend," Katniss says that day at lunch, her hands tugging on the Penn State hat he had been asked to wear after signing. "Do I get to keep this?"

"It's all yours," he says, laughing as she tugs it onto her own head, her eyes hidden from his view.

"I love you," she whispers, standing on her tip-toes to push her lips to his.

"I love you too."

...

Christmas comes much sooner this year, the first semester of school coming to a close before Peeta can even comprehend what it means.

It means that in six months time, he won't be here any longer.

Katniss won't be here any longer.

...

"I can't believe you got a copy of this," Peeta exclaims, holding the a collection of Justin Timberlake albums close to his chest. "How did you find all of these?"

Katniss shrugs, crossing her legs. "I don't reveal my sources but it was a long time coming."

It was Christmas night and after dinner with their respective families, the two had decided to meet at the Everdeens for their gift exchange. Katniss had gotten him a collection of albums, a set of weights he had been wanting, and the final season of Breaking Bad. Along with the new part for his car he'd gotten from his parents, he couldn't have asked for a better Christmas.

"Thank you," he says again, flipping the cover over.

"Why do I have the feeling you love JT more than me," she jokes, smiling slightly at him.

"Justin is hard to compete with. Don't take it personally."

Katniss fiends hurt before falling back on her pillows. "And what did you get me?" She asks. "If you didn't get me a thing I at least deserve an orgasm."

Peeta smirks. "Don't worry. You'll get one of those too," he jokes, giving her knee an open mouthed kiss before moving over her to grab the box he had hidden.

It's the ring his grandmother had given him and it had been a challenge hiding it from her for this long but he had successfully done it. Now he couldn't wait to see the smile on her face when she opened it.

But it isn't a smile she gets. Katniss gets sad, her eyes falling away from the box and her mouth gaping, like she'd been hit by a truck. The smile Peeta wears falls too, his eyebrows pinching together at her expression.

"What's wrong?" He asks.

"I can't take this," she whispers, closing the box and placing it back into his outstretched hands. "It's too much."

Peeta shakes his head. "It's my grandmothers. I didn't cost me-"

"I can't take it. It's too much."

Peeta realizes she doesn't mean it was too much in the sense of money.

"But-"

"Peeta," she interrupts, her eyes falling shut. "He said you would do something like this."

"What?" Peeta asks.

"Gale said you would do something like this."

The mention of Gales name in what was supposed to be a nice moment for the two of them angers him, makes him see red in the moment. "What does Gale fucking Hawthorne have to do with-"

"You can't give me things like this, Peeta," she yells. "I'm leaving. You're leaving. It's only making it ten times harder."

Peeta frowns. "We're not breaking up after graduation are we?"

Katniss shakes her head from side to side. "Just because we're not breaking up doesn't mean this isn't going to be hard."

"You think I don't know that?"

"What is this ring supposed to mean, Peeta?"

It was supposed to be a promise but it seemed to Peeta, Katniss didn't want that. "I don't know what it's supposed to mean but when my grandmother gave it to me and I thought-"

"So you're giving me your families jewelry? Great, Peeta," she exhales. "What if one day you want to give this to someone other than-"

"I don't want to give it to anyone else. Don't you understand that, Katniss?"'

"You don't know what you want, Peeta. You are seventeen years-"

"I don't care how old I am I know that I want you to have this!" Peeta yells back, his hands releasing the box it came in and letting it fall the ground with a loud thump.

"Don't be stupid, Peeta," she says, crossing her arms over her chest. "You don't want to give this to me. I am not the girl you want to give this too."

"Am I not the guy you want to get it from?" Peeta asks in exasperation. "Jesus Christ, Katniss. I'm not asking you to marry me I just thought-"

"I know that Peeta but I know exactly what that ring means to you," she girts, tears beginning to run down her face. In anger or in sadness, Peeta doesn't know. "I thought we agreed no going away presents."

"That's not a going away present. It's a Christmas present."

"Never before would you have given me a family heirloom as a Christmas present, Peeta. You're only giving it to me because we're leaving and you think-"

"Please don't tell me what I think!" He screams. "I have enough people to do that for me."

"I'm sure you fucking do, asshole," Katniss challenges. "You don't have to stake me as your own Peeta. That's not-"

"That wasn't at all what I was trying to do but obviously there is no way of convincing you other wise so I should probably just take it back in order to eliminate any other sources of-"

"Oh do not speak to me like I'm stupid, Peeta!"

"Then stop acting like it!"

_"How dare you!"_

Before Peeta has a chance to get another word out, most likely an apology, Prim bursts through the door, looking frazzled and confused as the two stand toe to toe with each other, staring down at the other like a rabid dog. Her presence seems to break both of them out of their angry haze.

"We can hear you down the hall," she says simply, her eyes falling back and forth between the two.

"We're fine, Prim. Just go back with mom. We're okay," Katniss promises, taking large steps away from Peeta, falling back into a corner of the room.

"I was just leaving," Peeta says, shrugging on his winter coat and hat, not bothering to retrieve his forgotten gifts. "Bye, Prim."

He fumes past Ms. Everdeen, not even knowing what he says to her before slamming the door with a little extra force than needed. He was doing something nice. This gesture was going to be something nice for her and of course, Katniss had to spin it around because if there is one thing she cannot do, it is accept nice things. But Peeta knew this, didn't he? What else had he expected?

And why, oh why, did he have to call her stupid?

He's halfway outside when he hears Katniss calling for him, turning around to find her hauling across the sheets of ice, her arms going around his neck before he can say a word.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry I freaked out. I love you," she says through her tears. "I love you so much and I really want to wear this ring. I am sorry, Peeta. I love you. You love me to, right?"

Peeta stares at her without speaking for a few moments, returning her frantic kisses and letting his arms hold her tight. "Of course," he says after awhile. "Of course I love you." How could she ever think an differently?

"I didn't even get to give you your last present," she says, wiping away her tears with the sleeve of her jacket.

"Which is?"

...

They board a plane to Austin New Years Eve, spending the night in the airport, sipping on watered down hot chocolate and eating stale pieces of bread from Starbucks. He doesn't mind. There is no where else he would rather be than here with her.

His father had bought him a plane ticket, one that would allow him to go to Texas with Katniss on her college tour being that if he didn't go with her, she would be going alone. Peeta would never see to that and even if his parents had denied his request, he would have no problem hiding in her full suitcase.

But that wasn't needed. And so he sat with his sleepy girlfriend in his lap as they made the three hour flight to Austin.

Her new home.

...

"I think you'll really enjoy this place," Peeta says the evening after their tour.

There back at the hotel, Katniss on "her" bed and Peeta in his.

"I think so too," she says. "There is only one thing that would make this place better."

"And what's that?" Peeta asks, letting his eyes slowly slip shut. It was barely tipping nine but it had been a long day.

"You."

...

When they return home, everything is tense, awkward as if the realization the two of them would be separated really sunk in. Peetas mom makes it no better, making it her job to remind the boy that there time was running low.

"And I thought cancer would change you," he says one evening at dinner. His father yells and asks him to excuse himself from the table but he has no problem doing so.

...

"You asked Katniss to prom yet?" Finnick asks.

"It's January, Finn. We got some time," Peeta explains, sending the football flying high to his friend who catches it with ease.

"Not really," he says winded. "Annie already held me at gun point telling me we had to do something spectacular within the next month."

Peeta wasn't surprised. "There our girlfriends. It's kind of implied that we're taking them. I don't see why they would need something big," Peeta says. "I don't see Katniss being crazy about being paid attention to either."

Finnick shrugs. "Maybe not but you see, the thing is, every girl wants a story to tell. What is she going to tell all her college friends about the way her boyfriend asked her to prom when the convo comes up over vodka shots one day?"

"I don't know," Peeta says.

"She's going to be like 'well after I got finished sucking his dick he just kind blurted it out and'-"

"Finnick," Peeta interrupts.

"Yeah?"

"Shut the fuck up."

...

All of the boys are preparing for the "promposal", as Finnick is calling it, when it happens.

They are stalking up with body paint - yes, body paint - at Walmart when they see the boy, wandering down the same isle with a bag of Cheetos in his left hand a package of beer in the other. His eyes widen upon seeing them all just as their own do.

The boys stand in silence with Gale Hawthorne for what feels like hours, all staring at one another wondering what to say. Due to his attitude towards Peeta, none of them really ever bonded with the other boy. Honestly, their hate for him was all equal. They were a group. And you hate your friend enemies. That was the rule, no?

Peeta rehashes the conversation weeks ago with Katniss, when she'd told him that Gale mentioned he would "do something like this", though he never found out what that something was. Staring at the boy now just makes him angry, much different from the laughing boy he had been moments ago.

Marvel speaks first. "Gale, hey. Didn't know you were back."

Peeta didn't either. His brothers had gone back to school some time last week. Gale went to school in state and Peeta had expected him to be gone again as well. But here he was in Panem much to his own annoyance.

"Yeah. I'm taking the week off. My mom needs some help at the shop." Code for: I'm probably dropping out this semester and need a week to get my shit together.

Peeta scoffs.

"Oh, hi, Mellark. Almost didn't see you there," he says. It seems he hasn't quite gotten over it yet, either.

"Gale, how nice to see you," Peeta remarks sarcastically, grabbing the can of body paint he was looking for and turning towards his friends. He had heard about Gale but hadn't seen him, not other than the occasional glance when visiting Katniss or a quick view of his car. "You guys ready?"

"How's Katniss?" Gale asks, a smirk on his face.

"Good. Thank you for asking," Peeta replies, equally as smug.

"Does she ever talk about me?"

"Nope. Never."

"Always the pleasure Gale," Cato says, grabbing hold of Peetas shoulder and pushing him the opposite way of Gale.

"Always, always, always," Finnick chants, turning his back to the boy.

"Why can't that guy just get the hell out of here and never come back?" Peeta asks once the boys are out of ear shot, his face red and hands clammy as he's pushed and pulled by his friends.

He wasn't going to hit him, he had enough self control to not do those kinds of things in public with cameras and a lot of eyes. He had a reputation to uphold now and couldn't spend his time throwing punches whenever he felt the need. But boy oh boy did he want too.

"You know, one day, when you're a big NFL player or something, and you're in a press conference, you can, literally, just give the bird to the cameras and say 'fuck Gale Hawthorne from Panem for ruining my first two years of high school'," Thom says.

"You're a fucking idiot, Thom. Jeez. Are we in eighth grade or what?" Finnick growls, slapping his friend on the back of his head. "I'll tell you what you do, Peet. You sit him down, buy him a beer, and tell him as politely as possible to fuck off."

All the boys stare at their friend with wide eyes.

"Look who's maturing," Thresh whispers, ruffling Finnicks hair with his free hand.

"Yeah. The person who's also maturing is also suggesting we run out in the middle of a swim meet with nothing but body paint on," Peeta mumbles below his breath.

"Shut up and do your job."

...

Their all completely covered in red paint three hours later, waiting in the back of Finnicks car for the signal Katniss is supposed to be giving them once Annies race is over.

Peeta learned he didn't really have to worry about asking to Katniss is any specific way. "I'll punch you if you do something like that," she'd told him after he'd mentioned the idea Finnick had. Peeta laughed and agreed that he would deserve such treatment if she chose to take that route.

"I'm breaking out in hives," Marvel says, his bare chest eliciting goosebumps. Mostly from the cold weather but nevertheless.

"You're fine, now shut the fuck up," Finnick says, shooting daggers towards all of his friends. His nerves are getting the best of him, Peeta can tell. He would suggest dropping out now but after the hour it took to apply the paint to perfection, Peeta wouldn't dream of doing such a thing.

They see Katniss moments later, peeking her head out from the door, waving her heads above her head, bouncing up and down, the yellow beanie she's wearing making her hard to miss.

"Show time boys," Thresh says, slapping the trunk and getting to his feet, running into the heat the indoor swimming arena provides.

Peeta peeks Katniss on the cheek before following his friends.

The swim arena was packed, much more than he had expected. He wasn't clothed, nothing other than the long pair of sweats he swore and he felt self conscience. But then Peeta remembered where he was, who he was around. They were all swimmers, swimmers in much less than he was and he couldn't complain about his body.

"Now or never," Marvel whispers, falling into line they way they had rehearsed. And yes. They had rehearsed. Many times. Finnick was taking this entirely too serious but none of the boys had the heart to tell the boy this. Their friend was in love. They couldn't fault him for that.

"Annie!" Finnick yells at the top of his lungs, his nervousness from before completely evaporated within a moment.

Peeta doesn't spot the girl right away, her red hair being concealed by a swim cap, but when he sees her waving wildly, panic sets in to his own system for some reason. The last thing he would want is for his friend to get embarrassed even though it was just prom.

"I have a question for you," he yells again, motioning for the boys. They all shuffle forward in a line, the words on their chests spelling out the words 'PROM?!'.

It does the trick. She smiles bigger than Peeta had ever seen, nodding her head as the entire auditorium cheers and awes in unison.

Peeta looks to Katniss who has joined everyone in the audience clapping. He raises his eyebrows in question, not needing words to get her point across.

She just nods.

...

On Valentines Day, the two decide to stay in.

Peeta offers to cook a meal, whatever Katniss likes because he can. She agrees without a complaint, the one thing she cannot refuse easily being Peetas cooking.

So he spends the day preparing, simmering this and frying that. Only stopping every so often to reply to the flood of texts he's receiving from Katniss or calm Finnicks panic over the phone about making the mistake of forgetting dinner reservations. He almost has the heart to just invite the two over but remembering Katnisses promise to make the night 'unforgettable' overshadows it all.

When Katniss arrives a quarter to seven, Peeta has the table set, music playing the background, and expensive wine in expensive glasses. The whole nine yards but Katniss deserved ten.

She's wearing a red dress, one he's never seen before with realistically sized high heels, one that bring her to Peetas eyes so when she leans in to kiss him, for once he doesn't have to break his neck. "You dress up well," he says, leaning in to press a quick kiss to her cheek.

"As do you," she says, tugging on the green tie he wears around his neck. "A little fancy for dinner at the Mellarks, no?"

"It is Valentines Day and even if we aren't going anywhere, I still want to give you the holiday you deserve," he tells her.

Katniss follows him into the dining room, her heels making her way to the corner as soon as they meet the cold tile floor. "You really didn't need to do this all for me, Peeta," she says, taking a seat.

It all smells so good she doesn't complain anymore after that. In fact, her plate is gone before Peeta even has a chance to make a dent in the lamb and plum stew he'd made. She goes back for seconds. And thirds.

"I can't possibly eat another bite," she says after her fourth bowl, pushing away the plate and settling a hand over her still flat stomach. "God, why do you have to make such good food."

Peeta shrugs. "In the blood, I guess."

"But most peoples talents are suggestive to one thing. They can either cook or they can bake," Katniss explains, making her way into his lap, her head falling into the crook of his neck naturally. "You are good at both. Good at everything actually."

Peeta shakes his head. "Not everything," he says. "I didn't get you a gift."

Katniss scoffs, getting to her feet as her hands make their way to the zipper of her dress, letting it fall to her feet, left in nothing but the strapless nude bra and a pair of lacy black boy shorts. "Peeta, this was my present."

She walks up the stairs, one at a time, looking back at Peeta who has remained motionless until she makes it to the top, turning to look at him with hooded eyes.

"Now come upstairs so I can give you yours."

...

Peeta has been hard for what feels like hours, his body begging him for the release he's not ready for. But today is Valentines Day and he doesn't want to rush this. He doesn't need too. It is his time to take care of his girlfriend no matter how many times she has made suggestions otherwise.

After her third orgasm, she pushes his greedy mouth away, climbing over Peeta to position herself over him. And as much as he loved this, it wasn't what he wanted tonight.

"Get on your hands and knees," he orders before hearing the way he sounded and adding a little, "please."

Katniss smirks, throwing her hair over her shoulder as she settles before him in the most primal position, her back to him as she spreads her legs, preparing herself for him. "Good?" She asks.

She knows the answer. She just likes to tease.

Peeta takes the moment to rub the tip of his erection against her clit, listening to her soft moans before putting the head in her entrance, waiting three seconds before entering her from behind, his eyes rolling in the back of his head at the new position. Why they didn't do it this way more often, he didn't know.

"Oh god," Katniss moans, her head falling into her hands as he begins to move his hips, softly at first and then rapidly until the only sound loud enough to be heard is the one of their two bodies colliding with one another over and over and over again.

"I never get tired of this," Peeta groans, twisting his hips until she's shrieking.

"Shit Peeta, I'm coming," she gasps, her walls grasping him as he, too, comes within her, moaning loudly, almost like a whimper, until his orgasm passes.

He waits a moment before pulling out of her, waiting until all the fluttering of her walls has stopped and he stops feeling spasms. He falls in a lump beside her, his lips finding her hair as she wraps her naked body around his.

"Happy Valentines Day, baby."

...

"So you'll never believe what I found on my kitchen floor last night," Mrs. Mellark says the next morning at breakfast, her coffee sitting untouched before her as she eyes the two men of the house.

"What?" Mr. Mellark asks without interest, to invested in reading about some basketball team from Ohio. Mrs. Mellark was famous for pointless stories that she made seem exciting. No one even reacted to them anymore.

"These," she says, placing something on the table that it takes Peeta only seconds to recognize.

Holy shit.

There on his kitchen table sit Katniss Everdeens black lacy boy shorts, the ones that had been discarded only hours ago in his kitchen. He thought he'd grabbed everything, her dress, the bra, her heels. She had left this morning in nothing but a pair of his boxers and an old baseball jersey. All of her other belongings were stuffed in a shoe box under his bed. Everything except her underwear.

His parents are silent, his father finally tearing his eyes away from the newspaper, looking at his son with a shocked expression. How could he have been so stupid? How could he have let this happen?

Everything was perfect, going good, going great. Something had to ruin it, take it in the opposite direction because that was just the way things were working for Peeta these days he supposed.

What would his brothers do in a situation like this? Peeta tries to think back to a time where Rye or Wheaton got into deep shit for something so reckless like this. But nothing comes to mind because even they had half a brain as to make sure everything was cleaned up before mom and dad came home.

Peeta starts to plan his own suicide when his father finally speaks.

"Son, whose are those?"

Peeta wishes his father would lose the calm tone, maybe be mad and yell like his mother was going to do because he couldn't take this side of his father, not now.

"Who do you think those are, Bannock? I knew it was a bad idea to let that Everdeen girl come over yesterday. What did we think was going to happen?"

Yes, what did they think was going to happen? Peeta had had a steady girlfriend for four years now. They had to know that the two were sexually active. If they didn't, they were living in a fantasy land.

But still. Having evidence right in their face wasn't helping with much either.

"I...I..." Peeta stutters for a moment, looking around him for support but he's alone. God how he wishes his brothers could be here, just for ten minutes to save him. Surely they'd think of a funny joke or whisper words of advice into his ear on how to avoid the grounding he was bound to get. But now he was on his own.

"You had sex in our kitchen," his father asks in disbelief, his eyes going to the table, his face turning green.

Hearing his father say the word "sex" almost ruined it for him but he tried his best not to show his own disgust. Peeta could answer this question because it didn't need a direct response. He just shakes his head from side to side slowly.

"Where?"

Why did he need to know this. "In my bedroom," Peeta mumbles lowly.

"In his bedroom," his mother repeats, putting her head in her hands before sweeping the underwear off the table. "And what? She left without her underwear, Peeta? Is the girl that tasteless?"

"I lent her some of my clothes so she would be a little more comfortable," Peeta says, being able to speak only when coming to her defense. "I'm guessing it just skipped her mind."

"Oh, I'm sure it did!" His mother screams. "The last thing you need to do is something stupid like get some random girl-"

"Random girl? Mom, I thought you would've got passed this 'random girl' stage once we had been dating for a year or has the point still not gotten across to-"

"Don't you dare speak to me like that. Bannock!"

"Your mother is right, Peeta. You will treat her with respect," his father scolds. "And your mother is right. You have a bright future ahead of you, Peeta, if you choose to make the right-"

"We're being safe!" Peeta interrupts.

"Well thank god for that! Who cares just about getting the fame whore pregnant! What about all the diseases-"

"That's enough," Peeta and his father say at the same time, both their tones getting the women to quite down for a moment.

"You owe me and your mother an apology," Mr. Mellark says after awhile.

Peeta offers one, not sincerely but enough to pacify his parents.

"You're not going to ground him?" Peeta hears his mother asks when he is halfway up the stairs. He pauses to listen, just for a minute.

"What good would that do? The boy is going to do what he wants wether we ground him or not. Lets not be naive about the situation, we knew it was happening."

"We did not know it was happening! You knew it was happening and said nothing to me about-"

"He never told me directly but he is almost eighteen years old and has had a girlfriend for four years. What did you-"

Peeta hears no more of it because he locks himself in his room.

...

When he tells Katniss about the incident at breakfast she bursts into tears.

There is no consoling her.

...

"Your mom found her panties?" Finnick asks in disbelief, laughing humorlessly as he deals the cards.

Peeta just nods his head, ignoring the looks from his friends as he examines his hand.

"Holy shit, and you were still allowed to come out tonight?" Marvel asks, staring at Peeta wide eyed.

"Dad convinced her not to ground me or anything. I don't know. I feel like they already knew it was happening," Peeta explains. He avoided his parents for the rest of the day though his mother still couldn't keep the angry comments to herself from outside his door.

"Still. How weird must it be to realize your child's having sex," Thresh says.

They all nod in agreement.

"And to find proof of it."

Shit.

...

Almost two weeks later and Katniss still refuses to come inside for more than ten minutes at a time even if Peetas parents aren't home.

"I can't go back there," she says. "Peeta they've seen my underwear!"

His parents hadn't said anything more about the incident, not even his mother. They hadn't forgotten, he knew that. Not when another package of condoms landed in his bed side table just days later but he says nothing about that. He's sure they were from his father. His mother would never dream of doing such a thing.

And Peeta was in no way going to mention to anyone they weren't using condoms anymore because even he knew they were being a tad bit reckless. It had been almost a year and Katniss still hadn't ended up pregnant. But that was no way to console an angry parent.

"Katniss, they don't hate you or anything. The more you stay away the more tense things are going to become," he says. He spots his father through the window, baking in the kitchen, his eyes oblivious to the two in the car.

"Peeta they have seen my underwear!" She repeats.

"They've seen underwear before, Katniss. I can promise you that," he says.

Nothing is able to settle Katnisses nerves and she drops him off that day, promising that maybe within the next year she would think about going back inside.

But they didn't have a year.

...

Katniss takes him to dinner in the big city over for his birthday, talking it over with his parents secretly and making them - mostly his father - agree that it would be a good idea to get Peeta out of Panem for a little while.

She packs him a bag and the two take the hour drive to the restaurant Katniss had reserved. It had been Peetas favorite as a child. Had he ever mentioned it? He didn't think so. But she knew.

The steak is tender, delicious and the girl sitting across from his looks equally as appetizing. He tells her so.

"Maybe if you're good you'll get to find out," Katniss smirks.

Much to Peetas dislike, Katniss pays for the meal, ignoring all his protests. She gives him the coldest stare he has ever seen her muster when he attempts to hand the waitress his credit card. He retracts it immediately and Katniss replaces it with her own.

"Let me do something nice for you for once Peeta," she huffs.

"You're constantly doing nice things for me Katniss," he assures her. "You don't need to pay for dinner. That is my job."

"Well tonight I made it my job," she replies stubbornly.

Peeta says nothing else, knowing it is a fight he will not be able to win. Instead he offers to pay for the one night he'll be spending in the hotel with his girlfriend.

"Your dad has already taken care of it, Peeta," she says as they pull to a stop in front of a ritzy hotel, Katniss offering her keys to the valet as the two step inside, checking in for the night and then taking the elevator twenty-two stories up.

The room is big, much nicer than anything Katniss has ever seen before but Peeta is at ease, remembering the place from the trips he used to take with his father when he was younger. They'd come to the city constantly for baseball games, the only sport they could really agree on watching together. It was always just the two of them. It would always be one of his favorite memories.

"Katniss this is too much," Peeta says, sitting atop the king sized bed they'd gotten with the room. Katniss had long ago disappeared into the bathroom. From his spot he can hear her humming.

Peeta turns on the TV, getting invested in whatever basketball game is on when Katniss stands in front of him,, blocking his view, wearing nothing but a tight orange lingerie set, her feet bare against the floor, her hair down in a halo around her head. Peeta swallows heavily, his eyes falling everywhere. To her hips, to her bare stomach, to the way her breasts sit nicely in their cups.

Oh god.

"Why don't you turn off the TV, Peeta?" Katniss suggests, moving to sit behind him on the bed as her fingers work to undo the buttons on his button up. She had become good at this over the years and it now only took her a handful of seconds. She pressed her wet lips to his shoulder blade, then to his collar bone, her tongue leaving wet streaks over his freckled skin.

"You are the most selfless person I know," Katniss tells him, tugging his ear between her teeth. He moans. "It's always about me. Always about Katniss but I'm ready for it to be all about Peeta."

It would always be about Katniss, that is what she had to understand. He didn't want it any other way but tonight he would let her do what she wanted, touch her only if she wanted.

"Why don't you take off your pants?" Peeta doesn't have to be told twice. "Go lay at the head of the bed."

He does so, watching as she sits on her knees as he positions himself against the head of bed, his cock already straining against the boxer brief we wears.

"Where did you get this?" Peeta asks when she begins to crawl up his body, his hands going to cup her breasts in two hands. Peeta had seen all the underwear she owned and this, this was certainly something new.

"Don't worry about it," she says, pressing kisses to his chest then to his stomach, her tongue making the shape of the "V" his muscle forms. He lets out a shaky breath.

They've only done this a handful of time, mostly because Peeta doesn't want her to feel degraded as he's so commonly saying. As good as it feels and as much as it turns him on, he doesn't want her to feel obligated to do anything she doesn't want to do. But god does he love this.

When she pushes his boxer briefs down, she licks up and down his shaft a few times, her tongue tracing each vein that runs through it, his cock pulsing in her hand as she begins to stroke him, her eyes on his face.

"Jesus Christ," he says, leaning his head against the board, his hands going to her shoulders. He didn't want to push her down but he couldn't help himself. Not when she begins to suck on the tip until he can see stars.

Katniss bobs her head up and down slowly at first, then quicker until it's at a pace Peeta seems to enjoy, his body beginning to thrust up on it's own accord. "What are you doing to me?" He groans.

"Trying to make you come."

Peeta whimpers, his eyes opening as he feels the familiar pull in his balls. This is the end. This is the home stretch. "I'm... I'm gonna come, Katniss. Come up," he warns her.

But she doesn't stop, sucking on tip until he explodes into her mouth, his hips thrusting up until he's done, his body just reacting to the aftershocks, his eyes not able to leave her beautiful face.

She swallows it all without complaint, winking at him once she's done. He attempts to pull at her, make her come to him so he can return the favor. But she shakes her head.

"Turn back on the game and watch for a little bit," she offers.

"Katniss you're half naked in bed. I don't think I'll be able to focus," he tells her.

"Well you need a little while to recover, I need to go brush my teeth."

"I can recover while making you feel good," he whispers, his nose nudging her neck.

"I said tonight was all about you, did I not?" She did. "So hurry up and get hard for me again so I we can really get this party started."

Peeta gulps.

...

When he returns home the next day, all of his friends insist on taking him out for drinks, no girls allowed.

They, too, go to the next town over, go to a few bars Peeta isn't really interested in, talk to a few women Peeta doesn't even see. The only reason he's even having an ounce of fun is because of the constant drinks that have been poured for him since Finnick announced in the bar when they arrived it was his 21st birthday. Of course, this was a lie but Peeta and his friends looked the part so no one questioned them, just kept refiling their cups.

He was drunk, almost to the point where he couldn't remember his own name when Finnick suggests they leave the place, mostly because they are getting swarmed and no one really wants all the attention. After all, it would only take one person to recognize the boys from the papers and place them with Penn State. The last thing they needed was to lose their scholarships over some dumb, birthday celebration.

They stumble down the street, Thresh and Thom agreeing to stay sober in order to take care of the boys, making sure they all make their way out of the street and don't pull too much attention to themselves. When they end up in a diner, Peeta tries to order everything on the menu but settles on pancakes.

His phone vibrates in his pocket, has been vibrating for what seems like hours. Right. He had a girlfriend. Right. He was supposed to call her when he made it safely.

He pulls the black device out, placing it to his ear before Thom takes the thing from him, talking to Katniss on the other line while Peeta looks on confused.

"Yeah, he's pretty drunk but we're taking good care of the birthday boy," Thresh assures her. Peeta doesn't hear her response but Thresh puts the phone back in to his pocket and keeps it there for the rest of the night 'for safe keeping' he said.

"You know what we should do boys?" Finnick asks midway through their meal, turning to his friends who are beginning to come down from their high. Peeta is still drunk, not the way he was before but drunk enough. "Lets go get tattoos."

They all groan in protest, even in their current state knowing that is not a good idea.

"C'mon! We're all eighteen, it'll be legal!" It would be the only legal thing they've done tonight, that's for sure.

There is no talking Finnick out of it and the boys don't have the energy to argue with him. So they find a small tattoo parlor, one at the end of the street. It's empty, for the most part, the guys behind the glass table looking up at the boys with frowns on their faces.

"Gentleman, we've come to get tattoos," Finnick says, eyeing his weary looking friends. "At least I have."

"Me too," Thresh says after awhile.

Well if he is the only sober one and is agreeing to this, it must be a good idea.

...

They all get one. All except for Cato had explained his mother would kill him if she saw. Peetas mother probably would too but he didn't worry too much about that.

He gets a katniss flower on his rib cage, hidden so that it will only be seen if he lifts his arm. All of his friends try and talk him out of it for a good hour, all knowing getting a girl on your body - especially at eighteen - would not be a very good idea. But Peeta thought it was. And it was small, barely even visible.

Even if something were to happen, he would never forget her; he would never want too.

This was just assuring him of that.

...

Peeta sits in the hot sun next to Katniss, his hand in hers as they listen to the speak talk, drown on and on about how great the graduating class is and how they will have the time of their lives in high school.

Prim sits on the stage, smiling brightly to Katniss and Peeta, waving her hands excitedly at the two. Ms. Everdeen couldn't make it and Katniss convinced Peeta that Prim needed someone here for her. So they ditched one of the last days of school for them and spent the day watching 8th graders talk about what a good time they've had at the middle school, how much they'll miss it and each other.

Peeta smiles when Prim gets a 'diploma', stands and whistles with Katniss when she walks across the stage like a proud parent. Prim didn't have proud parents but she had proud siblings, that was for sure.

When they are dismissed, a few awkward looking boys corner Peeta in the gym, wanting to talk to him about football and Penn and everything teenage boys think about. Peeta is nice, polite, and takes pictures with whoever asks for it though he sees it as pointless and slightly embarrassing. Prim and Katniss stands off to the side, smiling and laughing at the boy until the crowd dies away.

"Well aren't you mister popular," Katniss says.

Peeta envelops Prim in a hug, his arms winding around her body as he congratulates her for making it this far.

"I told everyone Peeta Mellark was coming to see me today and no one believed me. You're kind of a big deal in this town, you know that," Prim laughs, nudging the boy with her arm before running off with her friend Rue, disappearing into a sea of faces.

Peeta swings an arm around Katniss, pulling her close to him as the watch the girl so carefree and happy.

"You raised a good girl," he whispers, pressing his lips to her hair.

She nods her head. "We did."

...

Prom ends up falling on Katnisses birthday.

On the day of, much to Peetas annoyance, all the boys insist on taking pictures alone before their dates arrives.

The tux Peeta ordered is a size to small, hot, and constricting. With all of his friends huddled around him he feels claustrophobic and has to ask, many times, if they can take a break because he is nearing the early stages of a heat stroke.

Also to his annoyance is the fact that none of his friends will let him go to see Katniss. "Not until she gets here, man," Thom says, clapping him on the back and prying the phone from his hands.

"It's her birthday, man. I should've been there this morning to-"

"She will literally be here in an hour."

...

When she does arrive, Peeta is positive she is the most beautiful girl in the world.

Her hair is down, curled down her back, her eyes covered with makeup but it's subtle, making her look like a doll and less like a freak show. The dress she wears is red, long to the ground with bits of orange and yellow like she is on fire.

Katniss Everdeen, the girl on fire.

He kisses her before she speaks, not being able to stop himself no matter how many eyes are on them as the two embrace. As far as he's concerned, it is just the two of them.

Prim and Ms. Everdeen are here along with everyone elses parents, snapping photos and making them contort their bodies in silly ways. "We're making memories!" Mrs. Cresta cheers, snapping away until Peeta is sure his cheeks are about to fall off.

Finally, when the party bus arrives in front of the Odiars, the children bid farewell to their parents. Peeta grabs ahold of Katnisses hand as they make their across the terrain.

"Let's go make some memories."

...

To no ones surprise but Glimmers, Katniss and Peeta win Prom King and Queen, a pointless award that doesn't put a blinding smile on either of their faces. They just stand awkwardly, waving as people cheer for them.

"Did we even run for this?" Katniss whispers in his ear.

Peeta laughs. "No I don't think we did."

His eyes fall over to Finnick who has the biggest shit eating grin he has ever seen.

...

"I think I enjoyed this more than I did the prom," Katniss admits, her head on Peetas naked chest, her makeup removed as she lays over the boy in her own bed, listening to his heart.

"Oh yeah. No competition," Peeta agrees, his lips pressing to her sweaty hair, all curls long gone.

They are quiet for a long time.

"When do you leave, Peeta?"

"Two weeks."

...

His room is packed, everything he's ever known in boxes, all ready to be shipped off to Penn State next week. His parents are going down with him to help him settle in for the first few days, make sure everything is good to go. Lucky for him, Finnick was able to manipulate the roommate system so the boys would be able to room together, at least for the first semester. It would be tight living quarters but Peeta didn't care.

He looks at all the boxes, the ones labeled 'storage' and 'keep' and 'Katniss'. He hadn't realized how many things she had kept here over the years but it was enough to fill up a box. A box he would have to return to her in a few days.

The thought cripples him.

All he had were ten days. Just ten days left in this place and that wasn't enough. A million years would never be enough.

But ten days would have to be.

...

They try not to talk about it too much, mostly because whenever they do Katniss cries and Peeta has to fight the urge as well. He has to be strong for her.

...

One of the hardest things he has to do is say goodbye to the friends who aren't going with him.

Marvel, Cato, and Thom, some of the best friends he's ever had. He doesn't know what to say when he sees them. They all just kind of stand around each other, staring.

Marvel makes the first move, pulling Peeta into a hug. Not saying anything but not letting go for a long time. Cato next. Then Thom.

"Don't forget about us down here, okay?" Marvel whispers, his voice cracking. Peeta worries that he'll cry. Certainly he won't be able to handle that.

Peeta nods his head. "I could never forget."

"We better get an invite when you decide to marry, Everdeen," Cato says with a sad smile on his face.

Peeta just nods.

...

He goes to see Delly next.

She cries and tells him how happy she is for him and how much she is going to miss him. He notices how everyone speaks to him as if he's not coming back.

"I'll be back some time, Del," he promises her.

"I know."

...

Their last night together falls on their anniversary, four years together. Four long, hard years together that Peeta wouldn't trade for a thing.

They don't go anywhere or do anything, just lie with one another.

Neither even had the urge to have sex. They are both too sad for that.

"I love you, you realize that," Katniss says to him.

"And you know I love you," he promises.

Nothing else needs to be said.

...

When Peeta picks Katniss up the next morning, it is clear she has been crying. Her eyes are rimmed with red, her face puffy and blotchy. She says nothing as she climbs into the passenger seat, her purse in hand as she finds his hand across the console.

They say nothing.

When they arrive at the airport, everyone is already there.

Finnick and Thresh and their families. Annie and Johanna. Peetas family. Everyone.

"So this is where we say goodbye," Katniss whispers once they get to security, his friends and family traveling ahead to give the two the space they need.

"Just for now," he promises. "Not forever, just for now."

She nods her head numbly. "Here," she says, handing him over an envelope, his name written in curly letters on the front. "I'm not good with saying words but I can... I can write them."

Peeta understands. In this moment he didn't know what to say when there is so much to be said. His heart feels as if it'll burst.

"Katniss I love you so much," he says. That should do it. That should sum it up.

Tears begin to fall from her eyes. "I love you, Peeta."

They kiss, not for a long time but just long enough. Long enough to get the point across. He can taste her salty tears on his lips but he doesn't know if it's her own or his.

When they pull away they stay wrapped in each others arms for what feels like hours. Peeta takes in the smell of her hair one last time, he looks at the color of her eyes, and pink of her lips.

But this isn't the last time, he has to remind himself of that. He'll be back and she'll be back too. Four years wasn't so long in the grand scheme of things, was it?

"I love you," she whispers one more time before releasing him, giving him the shove he needs to go, to start walking.

He does numbly, like a zombie, not himself but just there. He chances one look back at her but she has her back turned, walking towards the front doors where they entered.

His heart breaks.

...

Peeta remembers the letter an hour into the plane ride, fishing the note from his pocket.

Finnick and Thresh are long gone, asleep and snoring.

Now or never.

The writing is smudged, as if she had been crying when writing it, the paper delicate under his fingers, her words running up and down the page.

_Peeta,_

_For you I would climb the highest mountain. Thank you for showing me what love is like, what trust looks like. Thank you for loving me in ways I didn't know were possible. I wish we didn't have to say goodbye but for now, we must. _

_I will spend every day for the next four months thinking about you the way I have spent the past four years of my life. I don't have a single regret, not when it comes to you. _

_You filled the void that I believed would be open forever. For that I thank you. I want to thank you for being there for my family, and for Prim who needed you these past few years just as much as I did. I believe you, too, showed her that men can be good in this world and that she can have good things. _

_You have treated me better than I ever deserved. And I love you more than I can express. _

_Thank you for sharing your life with me thus far. I am forever grateful for you. I hope for many more years if you'll allow it. _

_I love you more than you will ever know. _

_Katniss._

_..._

Peeta cries for the next three hours of their journey, his head in his hands as he sobs softly to himself, careful not to draw any attention.

But when Finnick wakes with a start, he worries, patting Peeta on the back silently, not saying anything. He wakes Thresh and the two try their best to calm the crying boy down, not sure what has brought the kind of emotion on.

When they both validate that Katniss and Peeta are still together, they both just try their best to explain to him it's only four months.

But in four years, Peeta hadn't spent more than three days without her. How would he manage now? He couldn't. That was the point. He was needy, dependent on this women and without her he didn't know what to do.

He also didn't know why he felt like his heart had been broken in two.

* * *

How was it? I wasn't sure on how to tackle the whole leaving scene because I didn't want it to be over dramatic and unrealistic. It may not have lived up to expectations and I'M SORRY! Please don't hate me.

A boyfriend once upon a time wrote me a letter similar to one like that. I found it the other day and almost burst into tears! The joys of young love. I often wish I could go back just for a moment to the first time I thought I'd found "love". It would be interesting to see how much it differs from what I think I've found now.

and on another note, THANK YOU ALL FOR THE REVIEWS. I appreciate them.

I have decided I am going to continue with four more chapters surrounding the college years when they are together and (maybe) apart? I don't know. Tell me what you guys think. Give me suggestions. Give me ideas. I'd love to hear them!

Please review honestly. I love to hear what you guys think.

FOLLOW ME ON TUMBLR: .com. I'm new. help me out.

-B


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

_"and if you're still breathing than you're the lucky one"_

_Freshman Year: 18-19_

In one word Peeta can sum up his first two weeks at Penn State.

Hell.

The boy had been through the ringer with football types of workouts, not having time to do anything but scarf down the carefully portioned meals that were hand made for him and sleep away the three hours that were left at the end of the day when the coach finally allowed them to go back to their dorms. He had yet to see any of the campus other than what was on his route to the stadium and bits and pieces of Greek row on his morning runs with Thresh and Finnick.

The Pennsylvania air was cooler than Panem, thankfully. He wasn't dying of heat exhaustion by the second drill but eight hours of football at a time differed greatly from his high school schedule.

And as the offensive coordinator yells in his face yet again about the height and velocity in which he throws the ball, he doesn't know what he would give to have Coach Abernathy back for just a moment. Having a drunk for his four years of high school ball hadn't prepared him for what he faced here.

The coaches rode him hard, ran him hard. Peeta would be starting this year, the whole nation knew that. He would probably be the only freshman quarterback in the league to start off the season. He needed to be ready, to be prepared, but he knew he wasn't. He had many other things on his mind.

The most common thing on his mind being Katniss Everdeen. Her long dark hair, her silver eyes, her velvety voice.

Standing in the hot sun now, he wishes he could see her, run to her after practice like he had done every day for the past four years. He wishes that after this she could come to his dorm room, massage the ache from his muscles and give him silent promises like she was so fond of doing. But this was all a dream because Katniss Everdeen was hundreds of miles away. Too many miles away.

Peeta hadn't stopped crying for a good week after the airport, his friends growing tired of his mopey, depressing antics and even chipping in to buy him a webcam to ease his nerves. It helped, a little, but each night when he hung up he couldn't help but feel even more uneasy, being that that was all their relationship was anymore. Occasional video chats and text messages.

It would only be four months, four months that was slowly turning into three until he would be going home for Christmas, to hold her in his arms and indulge himself in the warmth of her body. Thoughts of her were the only thing getting him through the day most of the time and he tried his best to hold onto them.

The whistle breaks him from his thoughts.

...

Peeta doesn't get home till almost midnight most nights, either working late in the library to try and get ahead on his studies or joining his teammates in whatever bonding they feel like trying for the night.

All the boys on the team were warm and inviting to Peeta and his friends. They always invited the boys out for drinks though they were underage, let them come watch games in their room, and hang out with them when their girlfriends were in attendance. When it became a love fest, Finnick and Peeta would usually leave, not feeling comfortable unless their girlfriends were also in attendance.

But Thresh was having a good time with this. He was thankful for that. The boy had had a hard time adjusting back to being himself after his split with Johanna.

One night, Brett, a junior receiver on the team, introduces Peeta to Madison, a blonde headed girl with fake boobs and a spray tan. "Peeta, Madison. Madison, Peeta," Brett introduces, motioning for them to shake hands.

Peeta catches Finnicks eyes who give him a weary look, his eyebrows knitting together. He gives a soft shake of his head, downing whatever is in his red cup before turning back to the game coverage softly playing in the background.

"Nice to meet you, Peeta," Madison smiles.

"You too," Peeta says, shaking her hand quickly before retracting his own, pushing his hands into his back pockets as he attempts to shuffle away discreetly. She catches him before he has the chance.

"Where are you from?" She asks, her hand not leaving his arm. He's uncomfortable, not just because of her hand placement and flirty smiles but because almost everyone has their eyes on the pair.

"Panem," he says. She wouldn't know where that was. No one did.

"Oh , I think I've been there on vacation before," she lies, nodding her head enthusiastically.

Her name gets called from across the room and she leaves Peeta with the promise to come find him later but he won't hold her too it. He doesn't want nor does he need to be found. Not by her at least.

He latches onto Finnick for the rest of the night because he needs someone familiar.

...

"You've got a girlfriend?" Brett asks in disbelief, his eyebrows pushing together as he shovels mouthfuls of pancakes into his mouth, not stopping to even breath. "Oh dude, you're fucked," he says. He isn't the first one to say it nor will he be the last. Peeta tries his best to ignore it all.

"Where's your girl, Peet?" Gloss, another boy on the team, asks, his hair too perfectly sculpted for the day they were all about to have.

"Texas," Peeta says without hesitation. If there was one thing he could talk about for hours on end, it would be Katniss. "She's going to UT."

"Yeah, you can count that one out," Brutus announces, shaking his head from side to side disapprovingly.

"Why would I do that?"

"She's gotta be getting something in Texas and since you're here, it's not from you," Brett tells him. "Girls are a tricky thing man."

He looks to Finnick and Thresh for confirmation that the older boys at this table are just being crazy, just saying things to get under his skin because he is new and because he is young. But they offer no support and have their eyes glued to the table.

He wouldn't expect Thresh to understand. He hadn't been in a relationship in over a year. But he expected something from Finnick who was in the same boat he was; juggling long distant relationships the way Peeta was.

"We've been together for four years," Peeta says. "She would never do that to me."

Peeta was confident as he said the words no matter how many protest otherwise he received. If Katniss was anything, it was loyal. She would at least have the decency to break up with Peeta first if she did decide to move on, see someone else. Either scenario would be horrific and life shattering to Peeta but still.

"Yeah. Katniss is a cool girl," Thresh chimes in after awhile, raising his eyes to Peeta and nodding his head. His face must be giving his emotions away. Damn him for being so transparent all the time.

"Their all good until they get a little alcohol in them," Gloss jokes, winking to a brunette who is in Peetas math class. The girl giggles, mumbling something to her friend, sitting down at a table with a pack of other girls. One of those girls is Madison and as Peetas eyes fall onto her, he notices that the girl is already staring. He groans.

"You should totally try and hit that," Brutus says, nodding toward the blonde who, much to Peetas dismay, is heading towards the table, her shorts to short and her top cut to low. If Peetas mother believed Katniss to be trashy, he can't imagine what she would say about the girl standing before him.

"Hey you," she says, saying hello to everyone else at the table as well before training her eyes on a very unnerved Peeta. "You left so quickly the other night. I didn't get a chance to say goodbye."

Peeta had left rather quickly, a short while after Madison fluttered away because he didn't want to give the girl another opportunity. Something about her reminded him too much of Clove from back home. That type of abrasiveness and crude behavior. He wouldn't be surprised if she too cornered him in a staircase and attempted to make out with him.

"Yeah, I was pretty tired," he tells her.

"Well maybe some other time," she offers him privately before turning to the rest of the men at the table. "My sorority is having a party before school starts, just something to have a little fun before we get serious. Hope to see all of you there." The way her eyes land on Peeta is not meant to be subtle.

She leaves in a rush then, leaving behind the smell of hefty cigarettes and desperation. Two of Peetas least favorite things.

"Well boys, looks like we've got ourselves a set of plans," Brutus says, slapping Peeta on the back as he stands.

"We're not allowed to go to sorority parties," Peeta says before any of the other boys have a chance to speak. They weren't. One of coaches main rules and Peeta wasn't looking to get into any trouble this early in the season.

All the older boys just laugh.

...

Peeta decides he doesn't like college parties, not nearly as much as he liked high school parties. Maybe it's the fact he doesn't know anyone other than the boys he showed up with but they have all long disappeared, leaving him alone to fiend for himself.

He could make friends, go talk to someone who is also standing alone or maybe find Finnick, but he doesn't want to do that. For some reason, his mind is gluing him to the overly expensive couch and telling him he has no business moving. And he doesn't. Not unless he wants another beer or has to use the bathroom.

He checks his phone every so often, checking for texts from Katniss or maybe a call. That's if he's lucky.

He had sent her a quick text on the walk over, telling her he'd be out tonight with some of his friends and she should call if she needed anything. She had told him she would be fine and that was it.

But maybe that was the point. Peeta knew she would be fine but a part of him wanted her too call, tell him not to go and spend the rest of the night having Skype sex with her. Oh what he wouldn't give for some damn Skype sex in this moment.

Other than the first day he arrived, he hadn't actually seen Katniss live or done anything remotely romantic with her. It wasn't her fault. He was often to tired to speak for more than fifteen minutes on the phone, she was too busy to text him at all hours of the day. There was never a time when Finnick and Thresh weren't in the room so there was no privacy.

He wouldn't complain. Well, at least he tried not to in order to avoid sounding like a brat. He loved his girlfriend and the last thing he wanted to make her feel is that she was being used for other things.

But sex was part of a relationship even if it was a long distance one...

"I thought you'd never show your face," Madison says, breaking him from his thoughts. The space his body allows is much too small for her body but she manages, one of her thighs resting atop of his suggestively, the position of her leg giving him full access of the purple panties she's wearing underneath the jean skirt. It does nothing to him.

He tries to scoot over, he really does. But it is almost impossible to do. So he decides to stay, tuck his hands under his legs and try his best to look uninterested in the girl beside him. It was easy to do being that is the exact way he felt.

"Yeah, um," he starts. "My teammates really wanted to come so I didn't want to be a party pooper."

"Yeah, I guess it comes with the territory," she replies. "So, Peeta Mellark, how are you liking Penn?"

"How do you know my last name?" Peeta asks curiously, his eyebrows knitting together.

She tugs a lip between her teeth, giving him a shy smile as he watches the pink twinge on her cheeks. "Would it be bad if I Facebook stalked you just a teeny tiny bit?" She asks. "I just couldn't help myself, really."

When he doesn't reply, she continues. "I mean, Peeta is one of the most common names I've ever heard. You weren't very hard to find, let me tell you."

Peeta nods his head. "I've heard that before, yeah."

"Well anyway, if you ever want to, you know, hang out, here's my number," Madison says, handing him a small business card with her work phone and personal phone number on it, pink smiley faces outlining her cell.

She walks away then, rejoining her friends who watch the entire exchange with hopeful glances.

Peeta wads the number up and throws it behind the couch.

...

"So tell me how college is?" Katniss asks.

It had been a particularly bad day, work outs starting an hour early and ending three hours late. His bones and joints and muscles hurt and he wanted nothing more than to lay in the uncomfortable cot in his room for the rest of his life. But when Katniss called, his day had gotten a little better.

She was leaving today, packing up her stuff and taking it to Texas. Classes started for her in less than a week so Ms. Everdeen and Prim were moving her down to let her settle in, get comfortable with her roommate and everything before she jumped into college.

"Horrible. Crock of dog shit," he answers, groaning as Finnick digs the Gatorade bottle into his back. This was the only efficient way they could think of relieving the ache in their bones but all it seemed to be doing was adding to it.

"Thank you for the vote of confidence," Katniss replies. He can hear her smile through the phone and that just about gets him through the next thirty seconds of Finnicks digs. "You know, Texas might be too hot for me."

"Or you might be way to hot for Texas," Peeta jokes. Finnick and Thresh groan in unison, mumbling to themselves as they make busy in the small room. There isn't much to do. "It'll be fine, Katniss, you don't need to worry."

She's silent for a long time. "Well, you know me. Always partial to worrying," she sighs. "I'm just worried about leaving Prim. She's about to start high school and the last thing I want is to feed her to the sharks and not even-"

"Katniss, Prim is a smart girl. She'll be fine. You aren't feeding her to anyone," Peeta promises. "You don't need to protect her from her own future, you know. She's going to go to high-school wether you are home or not."

"You don't understand. You don't have younger siblings you've had to raise," she bites. Katniss is right about that. If anything, it was the other way around but she spends too much time worrying about Prim and not enough about herself. If spending four years watching Prim grow and mature had taught him anything, it was that she was more of Katniss than Ms. Everdeen and didn't need any watching over.

Peeta sighs. "No, I guess you're right. But you really shouldn't worry. She'll be fine and I'm sure she's so happy you're getting this opportunity."

"She is pretty excited," Katniss admits, laughing lightly. There is the sound of what Peeta believes to be tape and then ruffling on the phone. "She's pretty happy she'll be inheriting my room as well."

Peeta gasps. "The room? You're giving her the room?"

"Just until I go back," she pauses. "If I go back. It's bigger than hers and she needs more space than I do these days."

"But there are so many good, virginal memories in that room," Peeta whispers lowly into the phone so his friends won't hear.

"Not very many. I don't think we've had any good, virginal memories in this room since freshman year," she laughs.

He can imagine it now. The green painted walls. The lumpy bed. The pulled back, battered curtains. The stained dresser and TV. He would give anything to be there now, just for a moment. God he misses her.

"Regardless," he says when the silence becomes too much.

"Three more months?" She says. She always says this before they sign off, as if asking for confirmation. Asking if three months is all they have left to wait. Ninety days. 2,160 hours. 129,600 minutes. 7,776,000 seconds. That wasn't too long, was it?

"Yeah, Katniss. Just three more months."

...

Katniss texts him to tell him she lands the next day around three, reliving to him what a horrible flight she'd had and how she hated flying and how she could really use a drink.

"A guy at the bar offered to buy me one but my fake ID was working so it wasn't needed," she says. He can imagine the scenario.

Katniss alone at a bar, frazzled and grumpy and mean. An older gentleman, most likely ten times divorced, offering a young, pretty sad girl some alcohol in hopes for squeezing something cliche out of her.

"But he didn't have anything on you," Katniss adds after a moment of silence. She hangs up moments later, promising to call later that night when she has settled into her dorm, met her roommate, done what's needed to be done.

She never calls.

...

"Put your dick back in your pants, Peet. We're going out tonight," Finnick tells him, loudly entering the dorm room, breaking him and Thresh out of his video game induced haze. Neither of them bother to look up.

"I'm not really feeling it tonight, Finn. Can we go some other time?" Thresh asks, peeking over his shoulder only for a moment.

Peeta really didn't feel like going out. Complete opposite of most eighteen year olds, he really didn't mind sitting in his dorm room all night, waiting for his girlfriend to call him or speaking with his father on the phone. He didn't feel the need to be out all night like most of his friends. But it seems everyone faulted him for this though it should be seen as a good thing.

"You guys are complete buzz kills! C'mon! Brutus and Gloss promised they'd get us in to the bar on 5th tonight, free of charge my mans!" He says, throwing his arms in the air for emphasize. Peeta didn't even know there was a bar on 5th. He didn't even know where 5th was to be honest.

"And Cashmere, Glosses hot sister, will be in attendance tonight so I would recommend putting on your sexy underwear gentleman," he adds.

Thresh groans. "Dude, you've got a girlfriend. You can't talk about other girls that way," he says.

"Yeah, Finn. You're asking to get yourself in deep shit, lets be honest," Peeta adds. But when Thresh pauses the game, he knows Finnick as won this round. By the smile on Finnicks face, he knows he's won as well.

"Just talking, no touching," Finnick says in defense, putting his hands up. "And we'll have fun. You know what? All drinks on me."

...

After the fourth drink Peeta has, the night becomes all drinks on him. A drunken promise that now puts him in deep shit as the whole bar orders a round of shots, ones that will go on his parents credit card. A charge they'll see which will surely get him an earful. But he's drunk. And he's making friends. He really has no choice.

He is actually having a good time, his teammates taking a break from being obnoxious and actually being a good time for once. Cashmere, Glosses sister, has brought along some of her friends who have brought along some of their friends and before Peeta knows it, the whole bar is chanting his name as he stands atop the wood of the bar.

No doubt everyone in this room knows he's underage, that this shouldn't be happening and they shouldn't be encouraging the future of their football program to act this way but the boy is so fun under the influence. No one can deny it as he moves to whatever music is playing loudly, laughing and cracking jokes with his friends and for once, not being so mopey.

"We need to get this boy to drink more often," Gloss says, throwing an arm around Peetas neck and parading him around the bar, introducing him to people he won't remember in the next three hours.

When Peeta orders his fifth drink, Finnick convinces him he's had enough, knowing Peeta won't be any good in the morning is he has one more sip of alcohol. Finnick. Who saw that he would be the responsible one in this equation?

It's nearing one in the morning when he sees Madison, whispering something into Cashmeres ear as she slips into the booth, her black dress too tight. Peeta wants to disappear but there is no room for that. Not anymore. Even drunk, he knows conversing with the girl isn't a good idea.

"To your right," he whispers to Finnick, watching his eyes cast over his shoulders.

Was this girl stalking him? It was sure starting to seem like it.

But she doesn't approach Peeta, not at first like she had so many times before. She takes a seat next to Cashmere, sipping on whatever Vodka laced drink she had bargained someone to buy for her, watching him. His buzz is long gone, replaced with more annoyance than anything.

What he wouldn't give to have Katniss here with him, just for a minute. To show Madison what he had and why he didn't need her. Why he didn't need anybody...

He pulls his phone from his back pocket, ignoring the texts from his brothers and staring longingly at the wallpaper on his phone. At Katniss, her smiling face as he peeks her on the cheek at graduation. Cheesy, cliche.. The picture was all those things but it made him happy.

Maybe it was chronic depression, the way he could go from low to high at any moment. Or maybe this girl made him insane, the way he could go from low to high at any moment.

At any rate, Peeta wasn't in the partying mood much anymore.

...

"Can you believe we're packing to go home?" Thresh comments, throwing a handful of underwear into the plaid suitcase his parents had got him for graduation.

No. Peeta couldn't believe they were already going home for break. He also couldn't believe his overwhelming excitement about going back home to Panem, the place only four years ago he had taught himself to despise. And it wasn't because of his parents or his brothers, it was because of Katniss.

Finally, the day had arrived. In twenty four hours time, he would be enveloped in her arms and - if all went accordingly - enveloped in her body. He couldn't wait. Not another moment.

"Sucks football's almost over though, huh?"

The only reason the boys were allowed to go home was due to the fact that they hadn't made it to a bowl game. There was no chance for them to pull up any longer so in order to save more air time for the other college - the more competitive ones - the school had postponed all games, given the boys the full two weeks off to go home. Peeta was upset his freshman season hadn't gone exactly to plan but they let there senior quarterback finish his years out. Next year would be the 'year of Peeta Mellark' and all the boys knew it.

"I can't wait to go home and see my girl, I'll tell you that," Finnick says, smiling over his shoulder at his two friends. As much of a flirt as the boy could be, he was a romantic at heart. Peeta knew he missed Annie just as much as he missed Katniss. Finnick just had a different way of showing it.

"Gonna show Katniss what she's been missing," Finnick offers, thrusting his hips up in the air, making obscure facial expressions as he does so.

Both Peeta and Thresh shake their heads from side to side but are unable to keep the grins off of their faces.

"I'll take that as a yes," Finnick smirks.

"At least you two have girlfriends to go home to," Thresh pouts, sitting atop the small cot he sleeps on. "I'm going to be spending my entire break hanging out with Rue."

"Oh don't be so sad, Thresh. Johanna will be home too," Finnick says. "You won't be lonely."

"And we won't be with our girlfriends the entire time," Peeta retorts. "Marvel and all of them will also be at home. You'll have plenty of things to do. Enjoy it man."

"Hanging out with you guys and having sex is not the same thing."

...

Peeta can hardly contain his excitement as the plane lands, the signal above their heads telling them it's safe to remove their seat belts and gather their items. He doesn't wait for his friends to pounce up or for anyone else, getting to his feet in a matter of seconds, grabbing the one bag he'd chosen to bring and bounding up and out of the plane before anyone can tell him other wise.

"Slow down, speed racer," Finnick calls after him, lugging a sickly looking Thresh along with him by the collar of his shirt. The boy had never been good with planes or flying. He was having a particularly hard time.

"You okay, man?" Peeta finally asks, taking one of Threshs arms and helping Finnick manage some of the weight. It wasn't an any task with the height difference but they made it work the best they could.

"I shouldn't have eaten that second burrito," he mumbles before emptying his stomach into a nearby trashcan. Peeta apologizes to the owner of the store the trashcan is by, handing the man a ten dollar bill for his troubles.

"Better?" Finnick asks when Thresh resurfaces.

He nods but says nothing, pulling a stick of gum from his pocket.

"Well if that's all taken care of, I don't know about you, but I'd like to get my ass back home."

Peeta didn't care too much about getting home in comparison to getting to Katniss, but she wouldn't be back in town for another day so he had time to waste.

Annie picks them up in her families van, her and Finnick having a nice romantic moment before remembering they were in public. She hugs the boys, her hair longer since the last time Peeta has seen her, the shoes she wears giving her an inch or two so Peeta doesn't have to bend over at the waist to reach her.

"Hey, Peeta Bread," she jokes, laughing as she winds her arms around his neck for a moment, pulling away and giving him a shy smile. "I've missed you guys."

"How's State?" Peeta asks. Annie had chosen to go to the state college, help run the family business. Going to college wasn't even really necessary for her but her father insisted she get some type of formal training before taking over the store in town.

"It's State," she answers, slipping her hand into Finnicks for a moment. "It's not the same without my Finny."

They start kissing again and Thresh makes a comment about already having a weak stomach, laughing as they all pile into the car, Finnick in the front, the rest in the back.

The hour drive back home is silent for the most part, Finnick and Annie having much more to talk about that doesn't include the boys in the back. Peeta doesn't mind though. He liked having the hour to himself to think.

He texted Katniss to let her know they landed but he hadn't gotten a reply. She was busy, he knew. Just last week she had gotten the opportunity to be invited to a writing workshop, one hand picked by the professor. It was a great accomplishment, especially for a freshman and Peeta had spent the past seven days hearing about it. But it made him happy to hear her so happy so he said nothing.

Panem hasn't changed, still small and beautiful and cluttered.

The house on the corner of the Seam that Thresh grew up in is still tattered and old and Peeta spots his younger sister, Rue, from inside the windows. She has grown significantly. "Call me if you get bored or something tonight," Peeta offers, bumping fists with his friend as he grabs his bags from the trunk. "Katniss doesn't come in tonight so we can hang if you want."

Annies eyes shoot up in the rearview mirror, her eyebrows creasing in confusion. "Peeta, have you talked to Katniss today?" She asks. Her tone puzzles Peeta.

"Not today. I texted her a little while ago but I didn't get a reply," he tells her. He checks again. No reply. "But you know, Katniss. She doesn't really use her phone all that much." She never has. Even back in high school, using the phone was not a good idea when it came to Katniss. She was never one for technology.

Annie nods her head slowly, her eyes flickering over to Finnick in the passenger seat who is looking just as uneasy. Are they keeping something from him? Peeta knows Finnick to well to know that if they are, he won't be able to keep quiet for long. They are best friends and they've never had a knack for keeping secrets.

"Is something wrong?" He finally asks as they grow nearer and nearer into town, closer to Peetas house.

Annie shakes her head too quickly, as if she had been expecting the question to come. "No, no. Just happy to have all you boys back in town is all," Annie says nervously.

"And that's all?" He presses. She nods her head. "Is that all, Finn?"

Finnicks eyes travel back and forth between his girlfriend and his best friend. Annie's eyes pleading him to stop talking and Peetas eyes pleading him to start talking. It was a crossroads.

Finnick is the one that breaks, inevitably. The words spewing from his mouth before Annie can stop him. "Peet, don't be mad but Katniss isn't coming home for break, okay? She had some classes back in Texas she couldn't miss and, I don't know where there was miscommunication between the two of you, but she can't come home."

"FINNICK!" Annie screams, slamming on her breaks to bring the car to a stop, lodging her fist into Finnicks chest. "You told her you wouldn't!"

_"You told her you wouldn't?"_ Peeta asks in disbelief. "Who's best friend are you?"

"I'm yours, Peeta! I'm yours," Finnick pleads, holding his hands up in surrender. "She just wanted to tell you on her own and the only reason I know is because Annie over here can't keep a secret and obviously, neither can I so..."

So she wasn't coming home?

"Is this a joke?" Peeta asks in disbelief. Surely Katniss would've told him by now. She was never one to keep secrets, not like this one. Well, he couldn't call it a secret but she was never one to withhold information from him.

He felt sick, sicker than Thresh felt in the middle of the airport. It was a good thing the car had stopped or he would have emptied his stomach onto the floorboard of the Crestas station wagon by now.

When no one answers him, he turns to Finnick. "How long have you been lying to me?"

"Oh, don't be so dramatic, Peeta! I wasn't lying to you," Finnick retorts.

"So all this time I've been saying how happy I was to be going home and seeing Katniss, how long have you known that was not what was going to be happening?"

Finnick shrugs. "Maybe a week."

A week? They'd known for a week? She'd know for a week?

Peeta doesn't know what's happening. What he does know is how much he hates his life right now.

...

His dad doesn't ask too much about Katnisses mysterious disappearance. Peeta is thankful for that - at least - because he has no answers. None other than the brief run down of it all that he finally managed out of Annie after what felt like hours of begging.

"You should talk to her," Annie told him.

If only he could.

He hadn't tried to call her again, not since he first landed mostly because now he was not only hurt but angry. She had sent him a quick text, promising to call when she got out of class but he had been the one to not reply. How the rolls had reversed.

Rye and Wheaton are home too. Even they can see Peeta is not in the mood to converse or deal with their teasing. They leave him alone to sulk in his room until his mother demands his presence for dinner.

Peeta sighs heavily. The last thing he needs is to be face to face with his mother who had been too tired to come from her room early in the day when Peeta had arrived. This hadn't surprised him in the least bit. While his father and brothers were happy to see him, his mother acted as if nothing was different.

"How nice it is to have all of my boys home," Mr. Mellark says after grace, smiling to each of his sons.

"Happy to be home, dad," Wheaton agrees, digging into his dinner. They all nod. "I know you two are sick and tired of having this house to yourselves by now, huh?"

Mrs. Mellark scoffs, covering her mouth with her cloth napkin. "Hardly," she says.

No one would think much of this if they didn't know the women. It was a direct dig at Peeta, one meant to shoot him straight into the heart. But he no longer felt the sting of her words and just shrugged his shoulders, finishing off the meal.

"How great is it to be home."

...

"You're not allowed to bail on us," Marvel says. "You were the one who came up with the idea in the first place."

Going to the lake _had_ been Peetas idea. Spending the night at the lake house which was full of liquor and beer seemed like the perfect idea when Peeta believed he would be spending the night with someone named after a particular water plant. Now that she wasn't in attendance, going to the lake house seemed like a chore.

They were all in the car; Marvel, Cato, Finnick, Annie, Johanna, Delly, Madge, Thom, and Thresh, somehow managing to squeeze as they made their journey to Marvels forgotten lake house. It would be much too cold to swim but their were plenty of other things to do.

"Katniss really would be here if she could," Madge tells him, her hand coming out to rest on his forearm. It is supposed to be comforting but the action only seems to constrict his airways. He rolls his eyes, pulling away from her grasp and focusing his attention back to the window.

"Have you even talked to her yet?" Finnick asks from the drivers seat, his eyes finding Peetas in the rearview mirror.

"No. We've been playing phone tag, I guess." They had been. It always seemed he would miss her by the skin of his teeth and vice versa. There was never a moment when she was available to talk at the same time he was. Both of their lives were moving in the opposite direction and it seemed they were having a hard time finding the overlap.

"She is really sorry," Annie confirms. Peeta wasn't too happy with Annie right now and chooses to ignore her.

...

He finally gets ahold of her once their at the lake house, everyone except Peeta fairly drunk and oblivious to the boy in the corner. But Peeta had always been the boy in the corner, probably always would be.

"Hello?" Katniss answers, breathless.

"It's been awhile," Peeta says, his head falling against the back of the couch as he waits for her answer, his eyes trying to trace the patterns on the ceiling. The flashing lights Catos app on his phone provided were making it hard but it distracted him from his own feelings for a moment. He wasn't looking to fight with her, not now.

"So I'm guessing you know," she mumbles. He can envision her lip between her teeth, tugging and pulling, the most annoying yet sensual nervous habit he could think of.

"Yeah, I know, Katniss. Thanks for the heads up by the way." As much as he tries to avoid sounding angry - and hurt - he knows he's unsuccessful. But he gets to be mad about this. "It was really great holiday surprise."

"Peeta, I'm so sorry. You've just been really busy for the past month with football and everything and the last thing I wanted to do was-"

"Distract me," Peeta finishes for her. Because Katniss never wanted to distract him in any way, shape, or form. "When are you finally going to understand that the last thing you will ever be is a distraction."

Katniss sighs. "I don't know, Peeta. I'm sorry. If it makes you feel any better I'm completely alone on this campus."

"You wouldn't have to be completely alone if you had just decided to come home like we'd promised," Peeta tells her, not feeling an ounce of sympathy. "Three months, remember?"

It was only supposed to be three months but she had gone and turned it into six, just for the hell of it.

"Peeta, how many times do you want me to tell you I'm sorry?" She asks, exasperated.

"As many times as it takes you to mean it."

And maybe it's the little bit of alcohol in his system, but with that, he hangs up the phone.

...

"Can you really fault her for wanting to stay in Texas and get ahead on a bit of work though," Wheaton offers when their playing a bit of Call of Duty, Rye long gone on the couch, all the food from the Thanksgiving meal taking him under hours ago.

"I wouldn't expect you to understand," Peeta grits through his teeth, groaning as his man, yet again, gets blown to pieces. "Wheaton you're supposed to be watching my fucking back!"

"I am watching your back!" He yells back. "Watching your back isn't going to help you from dying. You're horrible at this game, Peet. It's okay."

Peeta turns his control off, standing from his seat in the computer chair and rousing Rye with one outstretched foot, waiting until the boys wakes with a start before turning to the twins. "We're going out," he says, shrugging on his jacket.

Ryes eyes widen. He turns to Wheaton with a skeptical look. "We never thought we'd see the day when our own baby bro baited us into getting drunk," he says, ruffling Peetas hair.

"We'll I could really use a beer and I don't want any of the expensive shit dad keeps in the house," he says.

If his brothers have any reservations, they say nothing, following him from the room and down the steps, yelling out some excuse to their parents about their whereabouts and piling into Peetas jeep, the warm air coming from the vents comforting.

The twins are old enough to drink now so that makes things a lot easier in terms of obtaining the alcohol. Peeta was old enough to get into bars but he'd never stepped foot in one in Panem, believing them to be to run down. Plus, all the people in them knew who his parents were. The last thing he needed was for his mother to hear about where he and his friends spent their fridays nights.

But when the walk into the Drunken Rooster, it is empty for the most part, other than a man sitting alone in the corner with a bottle of whisky in front of him. Peetas feels sorry for the man.

"I know you're not old enough to be in here boy," a voice from behind him says, a familiar voice that brings a smile to his face the moment the words come out.

He turns around, Coach Abernathy dressed in his regular attire, his hair matted and greasy, looking terrible and smelling equally as bad. But Peeta couldn't be happier and waists no time enveloping the old man into a hug. He doesn't respond, not at first, but after awhile Peeta feels his arms wind around him.

"Believe it or not, I am Coach," he says, looking over his shoulder for his brothers who have disappeared into a booth with the beers. Though they played under the man, they were never as close to him as Peeta was. Never quite saw the brilliance in the drunk like Peeta did. They thought he was crazy for trusting the man so much but a full ride to Penn later, no one could call him stupid now.

"I forget. All this alcohol will do that to ya," he says, sitting on a bar stool. Peeta wastes no time before doing the same. "I would've thought you'd be hauled up with Everdeen for the remainder of your time here."

Peeta shrugs his shoulders. "She actually stayed in Texas for the break. She had some classes she couldn't miss and it just didn't make sense for her to make the trip down for one or two days," Peeta explains. It was the rough handed story he'd gotten but he would stick with it. It seemed okay enough to him.

"Ah, I see," he nods. "I never went to college so I'm not sure how these things work."

"You never want to college?" Peeta inquires. Coach Abernathy shakes his head. "How are you a teacher then?"

"You stay here for so long they find a use for you, boy."

"Coach-"

"Call me Haymitch," he interrupts.

"What?"

"Call me by my first name. I never did like all of you boys running around calling me by my last name. Never really fit. So call me Haymitch," he explains.

"Okay," Peeta agrees. It will be an adjustment but Abernathy could some times be a mouthful.

"How's Penn treating ya?"

"Good, good," Peeta says. "I like it a lot. Made some really cool friends. Thresh and Finnick are rooming with me so really, it's just like old times."

Haymitch laughs, nodding his head. "Where are those two tonight? Where is the whole gang? I could really use a good laugh. Maybe a quick jog down memory lane."

Peeta smiles. He could really use that too. "All with their families. It is a holiday."

"Then what are you doing here?" Haymitch asks, ordering himself a whisky.

"I don't know. Things at my house were getting a little too stuffy and my brothers wanted a beer so we ended up here, I guess," Peeta explains. "How did you spend your Thanksgiving?"

Haymitch motions around the bar, nods to the bartender who is looking bored out of his mind. "You're looking at it," he says. "No family to spend it with so I just come here and spend the day with Patty over here. He's always a big bundle of fun, nice company."

It didn't seem like nice company. As much as Peeta hated eating with his family, he couldn't imagine spending the holiday here, in a smelly old bar with a disgruntled bartender as the only person to talk too. But Haymitch had just grown used to it, he was sure. He'd grown used to the lonely feelings. Peeta feels bad.

"You are always welcome to come to dinner in our home if you want. Spend some holidays with the Mellarks," Peeta offers. It not the best deal but it beats this place. At least he thinks it does.

"You're mother would love that," Haymitch replies sarcastically, drowning the contents of his glass.

"She wouldn't mind it," Peeta assures him. "You've done a lot for our family, Haymitch. Without you none of us would be where we are now. Surely you know that."

The man scoffs. "I was just doing my job, boy. I made a few calls, replied to a few emails. I did nothing more than sign my name on a tiny sheet of paper. You all did all the work. The only person you all need to be thanking is yourselves."

Peeta disagrees but he says nothing, knowing there is no way to end the argument at hand. Haymitch will believe what he wants.

"You'll tell Ms. Everdeen I say hello, no?"

He slaps a twenty down on the table and leaves the bar without another word.

...

On his last night in Panem he goes to see Prim.

She isn't expecting him. He can tell by the panic in her eyes and the way she scrambles around the house picking up bits and pieces of discarded trash. Ms. Everdeen is nowhere to be found but he isn't surprised.

"What are you doing here?" She asks, running a hand threw her hair and looking over her shoulder anxiously. Peeta frowns in confusion.

"I had expected you to be a little more excited to see me," he comments. "Did I come at a bad time?"

It seems he did come at a bad time because the next thing he knows, Rory Hawthorne peeks his head out from the bathroom, his cheeks covered in red as his eyes fall on Peeta then on Prim then back to Peeta.

He gapes for a few moments, his mouth opening then closing like a fish out of water as he fights for something - anything - to say. But it never comes to him so the three stand in silence.

Surely Peeta knows what is going on here by the disarray of the house and the way Prim is on the verge of tears but he doesn't want to believe it. He feels wounded, as if his heart might burst and come out through his mouth at any moment. This isn't even his sister but he feels as if he wants to punch the little freshman boy in the face.

"I'm Rory," the young boy finally says, sticking his hand out in greeting, his hands shaking. Peeta stares at the thing, stares down at the fleshy boney hand until he retracts it and places it back into the pocket of his denim, his eyes going to Prim who has yet to say a word.

"I know who you are," Peeta finally says, crossing his arms over his chest. "So what are we doing?"

Prims eyes widen in panic. "We were just watching TV, Peeta!"

But Peeta knows what 'just watching TV' meant because he and Katniss had spent many, many nights 'just watching TV'.

Katniss. Shit. What was he going to tell Katniss? If he had half a mind, he would call her now, let her say what needed to be said so he didn't have too. But the pleading look in Prims eyes told him to do the opposite, spare the girl the embarrassment in front of her 'friend' and just scold her at a later time.

Peeta felt years older than he really was. Like he had just caught his pre-teen daughter with a boy, in his home, when no one was around.

It was the same thing, in a way. Just that he and Prim had no direct connection but after all these years, they pretty much did.

"Rory, I think it's time for you to go home," Peeta finally says, his eyes still watching Prim.

"Yessir!" Rory barks, grabbing his jacket and running to move past Peeta. Before he has a chance to get too far, Peeta catches ahold of his shirt, pulling him to his side.

"I'll take you home. Prim, are you coming in the car or not?"

She says "no!" just in time for Rory to say "yes!".

The three of them march out to the car silently, Prim chewing on her cuticles while Rory shuffles into the backseat. No one speaks, only Peeta every once in awhile to ask for directions but he knows where the Hawthornes live from the months of enviously watching Gale.

"How long has this been going on?" Peeta asks finally, his eyes meeting Rorys in the rearview mirror as he turns on to his street, Prim groaning loudly before putting her head in her hands, silently praying for a moment to end it all.

"Nothing is going on!" She screams, pulling at her hair.

"Something is going on or you wouldn't be acting this way," Peeta points out.

"I'm not a child anymore, Peeta! I can handle myself perfectly fine! Jesus Christ!"

Rory thanks Peeta for the ride, running from the car before he has a chance to utter another word. Prim looks devastated. Peeta looks confused.

He pulls from the driveway without another word, making his way not toward the Everdeen house but towards his own.

"Where are you taking me?" Prim mumbles stubbornly. "Take me home. Now."

"Well I was going to do something nice and take you to a movie today but obviously you were busy," Peeta says. "So now, we're going to go to my house to watch a movie."

"Katniss isn't around. You don't have to be nice to me," she says.

"I'm not only nice to you because of Katniss, Prim. I care about you believe it or not."

Prim is silent, her eyes looking out of the window as they wind down his road, pulling up into his elaborate driveway. Prim had only been here a handful of times but the beauty of the home took her breath away each time. When she sees his mothers car in the driveway, she freezes.

"Your mother won't want me here," she states, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. "Peeta, please just take me home."

"Prim, we are spending the day together as I had planned wether you like it or not!" Peeta just needed an Everdeen fill. He needed someone with the bloodline to distract him for the day and he liked Prim, he really did. She was a nice girl, becoming a nice young women. And after walking in on her and Rory Hawthorne doing whatever it is they were doing, he doesn't feel as if he should leave her alone.

His mother is home but she's asleep in her bed, snoring lightly when Peeta walks into the house, reintroducing Prim to his brothers who are also falling in and out of a food induced coma.

"What is this place?" Prim asks, walking into the 'game room' Peetas parents had built in the early years of the house for the boys. Prim had only ever been limited to the backyard and kitchen. This was a treat within itself.

"It's our game room," Peeta answers. "We don't use it all that much anymore but it really does have a good sound system."

"I'm sure it does," Prim says.

"So what are we watching?"

...

After the seventh bowl of popcorn, both Peeta and Prim decide they've had enough of the movie experience. They get in the car to prepare for the fifteen minute drive back home.

"You know I'm going to have to tell Katniss about Rory, right?" Peeta asks softly. It was his duty, he felt. If there was anything Katniss was protective about, it was Prim. She would have his head for keeping things like this from her.

Prim sighs heavily, crossing her arms over her chest and sinking into the plush seating in Peetas jeep. "I know you will," she says. "Just don't make her too mad at mom, okay? I told her I was going to Rues. She actually was being a responsible parent for once. I was the one being sneaky."

"Why do you feel you have to sneak around?" Peeta asks.

"Rory is sweet Peeta. Contrary to what you and anyone else believes and I really, really like him. We've been dating for a month and it's going really great."

A month? "That isn't long enough to invite boys over to hang out privately."

"We didn't have sex, Peeta. Jeez," Prim whispers.

"Do not say sex again, Prim, or I will pull this car over," Peeta threatens.

"Oh, don't be so immature! You and Katniss were doing it!"

"Prim, we were not."

"Sure," she says sarcastically.

"If you really want to know, Katniss and I didn't have sex until-"

"You do realize you're talking to me about having sex with my sister?"

"We were together for a year and a half," Peeta finishes. "We didn't have sex because we felt pressure to but because we loved each other."

"How do you know I don't love Rory?"

They are at her house now, Ms. Everdeen still nowhere in sight.

"You don't. Trust me. I didn't know what love even was until that moment."

"So you have to have sex to feel love? Is that what you're telling me?"

Peeta lays his head down on the steering wheel, taking deep breaths to calm himself. "That isn't what I'm saying at all. What I'm saying is, when the moment is right, you will know it is right and the moment, for you, is not right at this moment."

Prim sighs, still refusing to look at Peeta.

"I just really miss Katniss," she whispers.

Peeta nods. "Me too."

...

"So why did you talk to my fourteen year old sister about sex?"

Peeta supposes the two have made up. After a few texts, Peeta had finally plucked up the courage to call her, see how her holiday was, tell her he loved her.

"I caught her with Rory Hawthorne at the house alone. They've been dating for a month," Peeta informs her.

Katniss gasps. "NO! Peeta, how come I am just now hearing about this?"

"Well it did happen about ten hours ago, for starters. And, plus, I didn't find them in a compromising position they were just kinda, I don't know, hanging out."

"Hanging out? What does hanging out even mean to these kids anymore?"

"Sex."

"PEETA!"

"I'm just kidding, Katniss," Peeta laughs. "Don't worry. I drove the kid home, watched a movie with Prim, then gave her some very helpful advice. She's fine. Good to go." He leaves out the part about the end of the night, when Prim broke down into a fit of tears about her mother and Katniss and her father. He doesn't want to guilt Katniss anymore than he already has.

"Thank you for being there for her, Peeta," Katniss says finally. "She really could use someone looking out for her. Lord knows my mother doesn't."

"I know, Katniss. She'll be okay," he promises.

"Peeta, once again, I'm so sorry."

"Just water under the bridge, Katniss," he whispers.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

...

There is some talk in the locker room about Peetas possibilities in the NFL. Nothing official. All just talk.

...

It turns out Peeta and Madison get paired up for a lab in bio, something he hadn't been hoping for but she was ecstatic about. It also seemed that the girl had no idea what she was doing in terms of the class, so all the work was left up to Peeta while she sat on the stool next to him, talking his ear off about things he didn't care about.

The night before it's due, he has no choice but to invite her over to his dorm, just so they can finish the few pieces of the project they have left. He had tried to think of every other possible place they could do it other than his room but he came up with a blank mind. Finnick and Thresh had promised they would stay but when she arrives at seven, they are nowhere to be found.

"Hey partner!" She cheers, holding up a case of beer, smiling at him as she walks inside. Peeta rolls his eyes. "Ready to get this thing over with?"

"Never been more ready for anything in my life," he answers, taking the beer from her and placing it in the kitchen area their large dorm has.

"Wow, this is nice," she comments. "Nothing like the sorority house but it's something close I believe."

Peeta nods. "Yeah, Finnicks parents got the hookup. Are you ready to begin?"

She isn't ready because it seems she has forgotten everything he had asked her to bring, but yet, she remembered the beer.

"It will take me ten minutes to get back to campus! I'll be right back!" She promises, the heels she wears not taking her very far. Peeta would be happy to see her go if this grade was not so important to him. He didn't need to be up all night either. He had practice in the morning.

He takes his moments alone to call Katniss, listening to the ring until he hears her soft voice on the other end. "Hello?"

"Hey babe," he greets, lying on the couch, his eyes closer, phone pressed to his ear.

"To what do I owe the honor," Katniss retorts. He can hear her smile.

"I'm trying to work on this biology project and I just really needed to hear your voice, just for a minute," he says. "I miss you so much."

Katniss lets out a shaky breath.

"I know, Peeta. I miss you too. I wish things didn't have to be this way," she whispers. He knows she's in public, just by the way her voice quivers as she says the words. He's become so in tune with her, it can't possibly be healthy.

"Only a few more weeks and then we'll both be-"

"Okay, Peeta! I'm back," Madison says loudly, coming through the door that Peeta believed to be locked. He had to be better about that.

"Who's that?" Katniss asks, her voice no longer soft and sweet but sturdy and bitter.

"Um, Madison. She's my partner for this proj-"

"Oh are you on the phone? Silly me. I can wait over here!" Madison says, covering her mouth and moving over to sit on Peetas bed. Peeta wishes she wouldn't but with Katniss on the phone, he won't say a thing.

"Madison? Why didn't you tell me about Madison?" Katniss questions.

"I guess I never got around to mentioning it." He hadn't because there was nothing to mention. If they hadn't had similar classes and a few mutual friends, Peeta wouldn't waste any time on the girl. Even when she was around so much he still tried to ignore her.

"Is she pretty?" Katniss asks suddenly.

"What?"

"You heard me."

He had. Looking over at Madison who was making no attempt to hide her fascination, he had to agree she was pretty, just not the pretty he was attracted to. Her hair was too straight, her eyes to done up, her clothes too tight. She was the cliche valley girl rolled into one and Peeta had no interest in her.

So he tells Katniss no. Because she is pretty but she's not beautiful. Not to him.

"I guess I'll talk to you later," she says after awhile, considering his answer before making the line go dead, leaving him alone with the sound of his own thoughts and the clinking of Madisons heels across his floor.

He looks up at her, a coy smile playing on her face as she lounges back against his pillows. "So should we get started?"

...

Katniss has an endless array of questions over the next few days about his friends at Penn, most about girls and who he is around and who they are around.

"I don't really have girl friends," he tells her. It's not that he doesn't have enough girls knocking down his door to be his friend, it's that he has no interest in them or time for them. The only real friends he's made are the guys on the team and a few of their girlfriends, mostly because those are the only people he sees outside of class. He wouldn't call Madison his friend so he leaves her out of the equation.

"She's just jealous," Thresh informs him. "Any girl would be."

"Yeah. You two are hundreds of miles apart from each other and she's just worried you may be getting some extra attention from the female population," Finnick says. "You know, girls like to stake their claim."

"She's had her claim for a good while now," Peeta huffs. She had in so many ways. All over social networks there were pictures of her. They became 'Facebook official' in the middle of sophomore year and the relationship hadn't changed since. Anyone who saw or heard anything about him knew he was off the market, knew she had her stake in him, right in his heart.

Maybe everyone knew that but her.

...

Annie comes to visit to help Finnick pack his things for the Christmas break which is about a month long. She comes with boxes in hand and pink and purple markers, helping all the boys pile their belongings into a box to take home. They would be there for awhile and by the time they've finished, their dorm is almost spotless.

Peeta thought it was ridiculous Finnick flew Annie out here just to pack. But when he suggests they all go out that night, he knows it's also so he can pawn her around the campus, make sure everyone at this school knows what he has waiting for him at home. It was a genius plan and Peeta wishes he had thought of it sooner.

They go to a bar with some guys from the team and their girlfriends, Cashmere and her group end up tagging along too because it seemed wherever Gloss went, they went.

Peeta finds that quite strange. He'd never seen siblings as close in age as the two of them were, be so close. His brothers were friends but they never went everywhere together. Maybe that is just the way their family worked, he didn't know.

But Annie is pretty shy during the night, cowering into Finnick side and then when he begins to get rowdy, cowering into Peetas side. She had never been one for parties or crowds or anything of that nature and Peeta wishes he had spoken up, opposed such things and opted for a day at home. For her sake because she got that glossy look in her eyes that she got ever so often and he worried she would space out, go somewhere else.

"Do you want to go outside?" Peeta whispers into her ear, tugging on her arm and pulling her away from the pack of wild dogs called girls that she was in the center of.

She blinks up at Peeta, her eyes grateful as she nods her head and follows him out of the bar, onto the street where things are a bit calmer. They'd both forgotten their jackets and the early December air stings their skin. They don't say anything. Just stand.

"Is this what big college is like?" She asks after awhile.

Peeta shakes his head. "Finnick just wanted you to have a good time, show you off a little. He wants all the guys to know about the girl he is so madly in love with."

Annie smiles. "I get that. I just have never really been one for crowds or parties. Finnick knows that to he just..."

"Finnick loves you, Annie," Peeta assures her. "He just wanted you to have a nice time and I think maybe he got a little carried away in that."

"Is he gonna propose to me, Peeta?"

Peetas eyes widen, his eyebrows falling together and falling on the girl. Was Finnick going to propose to her? I'm sure one day he might but he wouldn't tell Annie to hold her breath. They were eighteen, Finnick nineteen but still. They were much to young for that.

"College is just when relationships start to get serious and, I know we dated through high-school but that was high-school. If we stay together through college that has to mean we'll get married, right?" She explains.

Peeta shrugs his shoulders, truly never giving any thought to what would happen if Annie and Finnick made it another four years. If he and Katniss made it another four years.

"I don't know Annie," he says. "But yeah, I guess it seems ideal. If you two really love each other, I mean. You shouldn't feel pressure to get married just because that is what you're supposed to do."

Annie just nods her head slowly.

...

As he boards the plane yet again to go home, he almost cries.

Katniss will be there this time, she had promised him.

He can't keep the smile off of his face the whole time.

...

When he walks from his gate, bags in hand he's expecting to see his brothers who had promised to pick him up from the airport. He sees them, dressed alike standing next to one another with a big smile on their face.

As he approaches, the two step to the side, revealing the best Christmas present he could've ever asked for.

Katniss Everdeen.

...

There is so much to catch up on, some much to say, but the moment they walk through the threshold of the empty Everdeen home, they know for now there will be no talking.

Katniss mumbles something about work and sleepover. Peeta doesn't need to hear anymore and the sound of her breathy moans replaces the words that come from her mouth and he couldn't be an happier.

The feel of her lips under his yet again is the best thing, the most rejuvenating thing the boy has felt in a long time and he doesn't know how he survived so long without it. He hasn't been living in the months he's been away from her. His body has been cold and distant and vacant but now he is alive. Katniss Everdeen brings him alive.

He realizes their in Prims room which he supposes is now her room. Peeta has never been in here, not actually stepped inside the room. It has been turned into a guest room, all of Katnisses books taken with her so the bookshelves are now empty. The desk in the center vacant and the bed coated with a rather generic looking bed spread.

"Cozy, huh?" Katniss mumbles against his jaw, leaving open mouthed kisses on the area. Peeta has no time to respond and spends the next ten minutes kissing the girl, moving her jeans off of her hips, then her sweater, then unhooking her bra, peppering her breasts in kisses.

"I've missed you," he mumbles against the mound, taking a nipple between his teeth and tugging on it until she keens.

"God, Peeta, I know," she whimpers, moving over him to rid him of the sweat pants he wears, his boxers tented and his member ready for action.

Katniss is positioned over him when suddenly she stops, her eyes glassy as she looks down at him with hesitant eyes. Was something wrong?

"You haven't had sex with anyone else, right?" She asks him, her face serious, the lustful gaze gone and replaced with fear.

Peeta frowns. "Katniss, how could you even ask me that? No, of course not!" He was loosing it. The fire in his belly was slowly going out but as she sinks onto him, it's lit. He moans. How did he go without this for six months? Never again. Never.

"Only me, right?" She asks, her breasts moving in time with her thrusts as her eyes slipped closed.

"Katniss, it's only ever going to be you," he groans.

Thats all she needs and she moves faster, not stopping until she's seen stars. She clenches and unclenches around him, her hands going to his hair to tug and pull as she rides out her orgasm atop him, chanting his name as it takes it's course.

He moves to roll the two over so he can finish but she stops him, shaking her head as she continues moving, her eyes falling shut again as she brings Peeta closer and closer to the end.

He comes a moment later, shouting her name and tugging on the skin around her hips, his head thrashing from side to side as he falls.

Katniss climbs off of him, taking her time in the bathroom before returning to him in one of his old baseball shirts that she always liked to wear. He hadn't known she kept them. She sinks into bed with him, her arms twisting around his still naked hips, her head going to rest in the crook of his neck while his breathing shallows out.

"Katniss," he says after awhile. "Why would ask me that? About having sex with other people."

"I know what it's like for athletes at big colleges, Peeta. I just wanted to be sure," she says without hesitation.

"I wouldn't ever-"

"I know. Stop talking now. I'm tired."

...

"You've officially lost your mind," Finnick says over a round of cards.

"Why?" Peeta asks.

"Never in a million years would Katniss accept such things," Marvel states.

"No. Never," Thom agrees.

"Well I guess well figure it out tomorrow then."

...

As you get older, Christmas seems to become less and less exciting. His gifts have dwindled down to two, the dinners are slowly shrinking with the loss of family members, and snow is no longer something fun, it's a chore.

So when Peeta wakes Christmas morning he isn't to excited. After a brief morning traditions with his family, he makes his way over to Katnisses house, gift in hand for every women in the house. He always did this, just because he knew they now looked forward to it.

Ms. Everdeen greets him at the door in her scrubs, no doubt on her way out to work. Hospitals don't close on Christmas and Ms. Everdeen was never one to take time off or so it seemed. But she thanks Peeta for the new set of Penn State pajamas he'd purchased for her on a last minute whim.

Prim loves the perfume from the mall.

And Katniss, surprisingly, likes her present as well.

"A plane ticket?" She says in shock, holding the piece of paper between her fingers gently as if it would fall apart beneath her fingers at any moment. "Peeta, this it too expensive."

"Nothing is too expensive for you," Peeta says.

Katniss rolls her eyes, shaking her head from side to side.

"You've lost it," she tells him. "But I'm really happy you got this for me."

Katniss clutches it close to her heart, smiling at him as he opens his present. It's a cork board of newspaper clippings, all about Peeta and his rise to stardom. She's given him something similar to this before, but now there are pictures and flags and things he'd never seen before. In the corner is a picture of the two of them on the night of the party she'd thrown him for his signing, both in Penn State gear, bright smiles on their faces.

He loves it and he tells her so.

...

Peeta has to leave New Years Eve, getting a call from his teammates about having mandatory practice the day after. Of course, this wasn't planned. Peeta wasn't supposed to go back until the thirteenth. But he couldn't argue.

Katniss cries when she tells him, not sobbing or being irrational but tears fall from her cheeks that night at dinner as she tries discreetly to push them away. People are staring.

"Katniss you know-"

"I know. I know. You have to, I get it," she interrupts, shaking her head from side to side quickly. "I didn't come down for Thanksgiving so I guess it's the same thing, no?"

It wasn't the same thing but Peeta says nothing.

"Can we just pay the check and go, please? I'm actually kind of tired," she suggests. "I'll be waiting in the car."

Katniss leaves in a rush, her burger untouched as Peeta asks for the twelve dollar check, thanking the waitress and following her out, consoling her in the back of his Jeep until all her tears have disappeared.

"I just miss you so much, Peeta. And I don't want you to leave," she cries. "I know I shouldn't cry but I really wish you didn't have to go."

"I'll be back, Katniss. You're coming down in March, remember?" Peeta soothes, rubbing up and down her back until her cries have faded. "I love you and we'll make this work. Finnick and Annie, and, Thresh and Johanna are in the same boat we are."

"Great. So we can make a club," Katniss jokes, her lips pulling at the corners. "I just don't want you to leave anymore. I like having you here, with me. And I know I'm gone to I just wish there was a way..."

"A way?" Peeta urges.

"A way that we could go back to last year, when everything was so easy."

That was all Peeta ever wished for.

...

On Valentines Day, Peeta can see that even Finnick is down in the dumps, his eyes sad as he moves around the dorm room, Thresh quieter in his seat in front of the TV. It was the first one they'd spent without their girlfriends and they were all feeling the stress of it.

Of course, Peeta had sent flowers. Two dozen of them that he hoped Katniss got before the day was over. He wouldn't be surprised if she didn't. The company hold told them they would be backed up. He paid for the rush order though.

He'd received a nice little sext this morning, one of her body, exposed except for the red and pink underwear set she wore. Peeta had spent the morning fighting the urge to relieve the tent in his pants. He couldn't wait until next year when the boys could move into an apartment, one with separate rooms and bathrooms. That would be the day.

"Do you guys want to do something tonight?" Finnick asks, toying with his phone as he sits atop his bed. None of them had class until noon. They spent most of their days lounging about the dorm looking for something to entertain them.

"I don't feel like getting drunk tonight, Finn," Peeta says.

"We don't have to drink. We could go to a nice restaurant, you know. Have a dinner," he suggests.

"The three of us? On Valentines Day?" Thresh questions, shaking his head from side to side. "Yeah the last thing we need is someone seeing the three of us out with no girlfriends, at dinner, on Valentines day."

Peeta agrees.

...

Finnick wins, like always, and by seven the boys are seated in the nicest suits they own in a sushi restaurant downtown, far away from campus so they wouldn't risk being seen.

"This is somehow more depressing than spending Valentines Day alone," Thresh says midway through the meal. Conversation had been rare up until this point. All of the boys just enjoying the atmosphere.

"I'm trying to do something nice for you assholes!" Finnick says. "I figured we could have a nice night out, just us Panem guys, relish in each others sadness."

Peeta knew Finnick was trying to do something nice, something sweet so he couldn't fault him for the fact that his plan had fallen through. He was missing Annie just as much as the other two were missing their other halves.

"What's Johanna doing tonight?" Peeta asks in an attempt to clear the air.

Thresh shrugs. "Probably nothing. I don't know. Haven't really heard from her other than the text I got this morning," he says. "What about Katniss?"

"Said she was spending the night in her dorm room, watching cheesy movies on the TV with her roommate who, also, doesn't have a boyfriend at the time," Peeta answers.

"Well gentleman, my girlfriend is spending her Valentines Day at the strip club."

Peeta and Thresh both look towards Finnick who is wearing a coy smile on his face, his head bobbing to the jazz music playing obnoxiously in the background.

"And you're okay with this?" Peeta asks cautiously.

"She isn't dancing, Peet. As long as she's not up there baring her goodies to anyone, I'm totally open to the idea! You've never thought about taking your girls to a strip club?" He asks.

They both shake their heads. Peeta had gotten his fair share of strip teases over the years but never, ever, had he considered going to an actual strip club. One with girls other than Katniss topless.

"Let me tell you, you're missing out."

...

He sits next to Madison in his bio class the next day, mostly because all the seats have been taken and she makes a big deal out of telling him she's saved one for him right in the front. He curses, pushing past a pack of blondes who eye him carefully and sit next to her, offering her a quick nod before digging his Mac out of his bag, his fingers finding the buttons.

"So how did you spend your Valentines Day?" She asks, her eyebrows shooting up in question. "We sure did miss you at the singles party last night."

"Well I'm not single so," Peeta mumbles, rolling his eyes. How many times did he have to say it before he got the point across?

"Oh that's right. Katherine is so lucky to have you," Madison mumbles, reaching her hand out to graze his flannel covered arm.

"It's Katniss," he grunts, pulling away from her touch. "And it's the other way around."

Madison is silent for the most part for the remainder of the hour, only speaking every once in awhile to ask Peeta if she could look over his notes or ask him about something the teacher said. For once, she is not being flirty and just being attentive. Maybe the two could actually get along if she acted this way more often.

But when the professor dismisses them, she wastes no time before attaching herself to his side, linking her arm through his as he walks from the classroom. "So, I was thinking, maybe we could go get some frozen yogurt or Starbucks or something," she suggests, her eyes twinkling as he looks down at her in confusion. Had they not just had a conversation about his fucking girlfriend?

"Jesus Christ, Madison," he says, unlinking his arm rather quickly and moving five feet ahead of her. "I have a girlfriend."

"Who is miles away, Peeta," she says. "I have no problem with secrets if you don't have a problem keeping one."

"I literally cannot even believe you are saying this to me right now," Peeta cries, turning on his heel to face her. "Madison, I think you're nice and yes, you're pretty but no, I don't want to go out with you or anything in that nature. I have a girlfriend whom I love and I don't think she would appreciate the endless array of signals you keep sending me."

In that moment, Peeta doesn't care about her feeling for once. The only thing he cares about is getting his point across. By the smile on her face, it's obvious that he hasn't done so.

"Call me when you're ready to have a little fun, Peeta."

...

"I need you guys out of the room by two," Peeta says, working frantically to clear the room of the smells that have been manifested within it for weeks now. "Katniss gets here at two thirty and I'd like to have the place to ourselves for a little."

Thresh and Finnick stand with smirks on their faces, numbly nodding their heads as they "help" Peeta clean, mumbling every once and awhile about this and about that. Peeta tries not to pay attention to it, not wanting his friends to get the best of him. Not today.

Katniss was coming, coming in from Texas for the whole week of Spring Break. Nothing was more exciting than that. Especially because she would also be here for his birthday. It was the only thing she wouldn't be missing.

A taxi was bringing her, one Peeta had already paid for and as the clock inched closer to one-thirty, Peeta could hardly retain his breathing.

Oh boy, oh boy.

...

Peeta drives his hips forward, Katniss underneath him rocking back in time with his thrusts, her eyes wide as she stares up at him, her mouth hanging open as she lets moans of satisfaction out.

"Fuck, Peeta," she whimpers, eyes closing as her own hand falls down her stomach to stimulate her already sensitive clit.

It wouldn't take long. Maybe another minute and a half but that was all Peeta needed. He didn't know how often they would actually get to have sex because of his roommate situation so he was taking full advantage of the hour he had now, bringing her to an orgasm three times before the main event.

"Are you close?" He croaks, his head falling to his shoulder as the fire begins to burn up his stomach, coming closer and closer to exploding. He hopes he's close because he can't last another second.

"Yes," she says. "Fuck yes!"

Then they come, the two of them together, their moans mixing with each others until there is nothing left to cry about. Peeta falls atop her with a sigh, making sure to hold most of his weight to avoid hurting her.

When he finally looks up, her hair sweaty and stuck to her sides, she smiles.

"Hi."

...

"So what is there to do at this place besides drink and play football?"

Peeta had taken Katniss on a tour, not really of anything in real significance but of things he sees everyday, the things he does. And she is right. So far, he hasn't shown her anything but where he plays football and where he gets drunk.

"Nothing other than that," he says. "I guess I'm kind of getting my education but even that is a little rocky at times."

Katniss laughs, cowering into his side as she moves about the campus with her hand in his, stealing kisses and commenting on things he never would have noticed. But he noticed everything when he was with her.

They run into Brett at Starbucks.

"Peeta, my boy. Who do we have here?" He asks, placing his money on the counter and moving to face Katniss head on, his eyes raking over her body and then back to her face.

"This is my girlfriend, Katniss," he introduces, motioning between the two of them awkwardly. "Katniss, Brett. Brett, Katniss."

"So you're the girl Peeta is always crying about?" He jokes, shaking hands with her, holding her grip for a moment longer than he needs too. "Kidding, kidding, kidding. But really, I've heard so much about you."

"So have I," Katniss lies. "I'm happy to be here."

"How long are you staying?"

"Day after Peetas birthday. So about eight days," she says.

Bretts eyes light up. "Peeta, you didn't tell us you had a birthday coming up!" Brett cheers. "What is it, the big 1-9?"

Peeta shrugs. "Slipped my mind, I guess. I don't know." Really, he just didn't want a celebration.

"Well, we will go out, have a good time, invite everyone!"

Peeta is about to object when Katniss opens her mouth. "That would be fun!" She says. "I really want to meet all the friends I hear so much about."

"You really-"

"You see, Peet? You're girls up for it!" Brett says, clapping him on the back. "I'll text you with plans. Let Odiar know what's up. Nice meeting you, Katniss. I will see you on Saturday."

...

Much to Peetas distress, no one was lying about the gigantic party they would throw Peeta in honor of his birthday.

They have it at Cashmeres sorority house, a place Peeta has never personally been too but suddenly is throwing a party in his name. He's sure the whole campus has showed up but mostly that is because of the free alcohol that was promised on the group text. Peeta has never seen a good majority of these people in his life.

"This is really fun!" Katniss calls over the loud roar of the music, finishing off her red cup and moving on to the next. The black dress she wears really does a good job in accenting all her best qualities. Peeta cannot complain. "I don't know why you complained so much."

"I just don't like the attention, you could say," Peeta says, bumping fist with a few of his classmates that walk by. "I would really have just preferred to have gone to dinner with you and-"

"Oh, save it!" Katniss says, covering his mouth with her palm. "This is fun! Nothing like this happens in Texas."

"You don't go out?" He asks, feeling guilty.

She shakes her head. "No, I do. I just don't really have a fan club that follows me around," she jokes. It was true. Peeta had drawn a large crowd but that had nothing to do with him.

"Oh please you-"

"Peeta! Hey!"

The voice registers in his ear half a second to late, by the time he has a moment to look over his shoulder, small arms encircle his waist, a warm body pressed to tightly for comfort against his.

"I've been looking all over for the birthday boy! I even bought you a little present," Madison coos, her eyes lingering on his. Peeta looks away quickly, his hand finding Katnisses but when he reaches it, she retracts, her eyes narrowed at the girl in front of her.

"Hi," Katniss says, stepping forward, one foot in front of Peeta protectively. "I'm Katniss."

"Katniss? Do you go here? I don't think I've seen you," Madison says, sending her a condescending smile. When Katniss retracts, obivously shocked by the statement, Madison takes her silence as a moment to pounce. "Oh right!" She says loudly, clapping her hands together. "You're the girlfriend."

"Yes, I am," Katniss says, her voice even but her breathing shallow. "And I'm sorry, you are?"

"Madison," she replies, her hand going to rest on Peetas arm. He pulls away immediately.

"I don't think I've heard of you, Madison," Katniss lies. Of course she had heard of her. Katniss had done nothing over the past few weeks but wrack her brain about the girl standing before her. The girl Peeta had claimed wasn't beautiful.

"Oh what a shame. Peeta hasn't mentioned all the time we've-"

"We haven't been spending any time together," Peeta interjects, knowing the direction the conversation is going is unsettling his girlfriend who is already on the attack.

"But the other day in your dorm-"

"Madison!" Peeta screams, his eyes nearly bursting from his head. Why did this have to happen now? Why couldn't they have had this conversation some other time? Preferably not at all. Peeta didn't want to keep anything from Katniss but some things were better left unsaid.

"No, let the girl finish, Peeta," Katniss tells him, her eyes sharp like knives. "Please, continue to tell me what you were doing in _my_ boyfriends dorm room."

Madison narrows her eyes. "Oh, you know-"

"Hey guys! What are we talking about?" Finnick interrupts, looping one arm around Katniss, holding her in place because, even to others around them, it was clear Katniss was about to snap. Peeta actually wouldn't mind if she did. Maybe it would put Madison in her place but he also didn't want to spend his birthday breaking up bar fights.

"We weren't talking about anything, Finnick. In fact I was just leaving," Katniss says, using her hands to pry Finnick away as she moves through the crowd, weaving and bobbing away from the swarms of people. Peeta loses her immediately but wastes no time moving after her, following her path.

He calls, no, screams her name at the top of his lungs, begging her to stop moving even when he can no longer see her. He gets strange looks, pushing people away who are beginning to grab at him for conversation. He has no time for them now. Not time for them ever.

Shit. Shit, where did she go?

She doesn't know where she is. This isn't Panem and she just can't go running into the night whenever she pleases. Peeta is not only worried about her anger towards him but in the moment, about her safety. The logical part of his mind assured him nothing bad would happen to her but he would hate himself if something did. If he was responsible for her being hurt in any way.

Katniss is walking blind in the night and Peeta fears the worst.

...

He finds Katniss about two hours later, his birthday coming and going but the party still raging on. She's in his dorm, sitting outside on the deck, a cigarette in her hand, her hoodie propped over her head.

She doesn't hear him coming and by the time she does, it's too late to move. Peetas body has barricaded the door, making it impossible for her to go anywhere. At least safely. She could always jump over the ledge and from the look of pure anger on her face, he wouldn't be surprised if she did.

"I'm going home," she tells him, her arms crossed over her chest. She exhales a nice amount of smoke.

"I didn't know you smoked," Peeta says simply, knowing her threat is an empty one unless she paid the two hundred dollars to change it.

"I didn't either. Some girl offered it to me in the hall and I figured, why the hell not," Katniss says. "I have to tell you, it's not my favorite thing."

"Katniss, you can't just run off like that," Peeta fumes. As happy as he is to see her, to see her well, he is angry at her for doing such a reckless thing. "You could've been hurt." Or worse. "And if you didn't want me looking for you, you could've at least answered your phone!"

"You looked like you were having a great time, Peeta," she rasps. "No one said you had to come looking for me. I'm a big girl. I can handle myself."

"I know you can but it still doesn't ease my worry any less."

"You know what's defiantly not easing my worry any less?" She asks rhetorically. "How beautiful that Madison girl is, Peeta. Lord have mercy, those eyes. Wow. You got yourself a good one."

"You have nothing to worry about, Katniss. I thought being with me for four years would make you-"

"Don't give me that shit, Peeta," she snaps. "I don't care how many years we've been together, distance changes everything!"

Distance does change everything, that much he could agree on. But it hadn't changed him. At least not his feelings about her.

"Don't pretend like you haven't felt it," she whispers, looking down at her bare feet, tears falling down her cheeks and onto the pavement. "I think it's complete bullshit you keep things like that from me, that is all I'm saying."

She throws the cigarette over the edge, pushing past a shell shocked Peeta and back into the small dorm room.

"I wasn't trying to keep anything from you, Katniss. I was just trying to not make you worry," he admits.

"No, Peeta. You were keeping things from me because you thought that's what I would want. You thought that I would never, ever really find out about this girl. You wouldn't have told me a thing about her had she not-"

"There is nothing to tell!" Peeta yells, throwing his hands up in anger. "There is nothing to tell. Nothing about her that I care to tell you about! You shouldn't worry because I am not that type of-"

"Whatever, Peeta! When a pretty girl is hanging around your dorm, that is something to mention. If you don't mention it, you're keeping secrets!" She says. "I don't want you to speak to her anymore," she whispers after a moment when Peeta is silent, continuing to fume within himself.

"Fine with me, Katniss!"

Katniss breaths deeply, her eyes not falling from Peetas. As much as he wished the fight to be over, he knows it's not. Not by the way the crinkle between her eyebrows has yet to smooth over or by the way her hands clench and unclench beside her.

"I really am leaving," she finally whispers, the venom not yet out of her voice. "I'm going home tomorrow morning."

"You don't have-"

"I don't have to do anything but I want too."

They stand in silence. The two of them looking between one another wondering how in the hell a good weekend had turned into this. Peeta feels wounded. Katniss feels angry.

"If that's really what you want to do," Peeta finally manages to say after the vile in his throat as disappeared. "I wish you would just stay. It's only two days more. Then you can go home and be as mad as you want to be."

"I'm not mad at you," Katniss whispers. "Just angry."

"Isn't that the same thing?"

"No. I won't stay angry for long," she assures. "Maybe I should stay in a hotel for the night."

Peeta shakes his head. "Please just stay with me," he begs.

She climbs wordlessly into his bed and he follows suit, making sure not to touch her.

...

She's gone when he wakes the next morning. Her bags are too.

It's well past noon when Thresh and Finnick also begin to rouse, their eyes tired as they empty their stomachs into the toilet in the bathroom. They moan and groan all throughout the morning. Peeta says nothing to them and they say nothing to him.

Peeta isn't sure wether he should be angry or upset.

It's a mixture of both.

...

His mother is sick again.

After going back to the doctor last week, they have all concluded the cancer is back and spreading rapidly or so that's what his mother relays. So he takes all of his finals early - some of his teachers feeling sympathy for the boy and not even making him take them - and flies home a week ahead of schedule to be with his family.

His brothers must stay being graduation is so quickly approaching. So Peeta is utterly alone in his home with his dying mother and depressed father.

He takes over the bakery for a few weeks, his father not having the time or the energy to run it by himself anymore. His mother requires alot of time and care and Peeta knows the old man isn't getting too much sleep. Working here is the least he can do and when all of his friends return home for summer, they start helping too.

Most days, it's just him and Delly. Delly because she is the only one with a big enough heart to spend all of her time here. Even his friends know summer is short and they can't waste all their time helping their friend.

"You know, Katniss is coming in today," Delly mentions to him one day as she wipes down the tables in the front.

Peetas ears perk up and he nods. "She mentioned that she was. I don't know. I haven't talked to her that much lately." He hadn't. Other than a few text messages and a hand full of phone calls, he hadn't spoken to his girlfriend, things hard enough for him to manage at home by himself without the added stress of her.

He curses himself for thinking of her as an added stress but slowly and surely, that is what she was becoming. Distance did change everything and he watched as their relationship went from being a fairytale to being a chore. But he loved her too much to let her go, her the same. It was just a rough patch, he'd convinced himself. Nothing more than just a rough patch.

"Do you want to drive to the airport with me to pick her up at four? I know she'd be very happy to see you," Delly whispers.

Peeta shakes his head. "I can't leave the bakery."

"We could close a little early, Peeta. It wouldn't be an issue. I'm sure your father-"

"Maybe another time, Dell."

They don't talk anymore about Katniss and when Delly leaves early that day, she promises to be by in the morning.

...

The bells above the bakery ring, the hot humid summer air trickling in. Peeta groans, the fans in the bakery no longer doing their job, making working impossible.

Finnick is with him today, mostly because Peeta guilted the boy into it but still. He is happy to have his company on this day.

"Hey, you," a voice calls from the front of the shop, alerting Peeta out of his bread induced haze and back towards the front. It was a voice he would recognize anywhere.

"Katniss," he says, removing his apron and moving to the front, finding her and Finnick engrossed in an intense conversation. "Finnick, can you go to the back for a minute."

Neither of them had noticed he was standing there and upon hearing his voice, they jump. Finnick picks up his feet, mumbling something under his breath and moving swiftly away from the two, closing the door with a soft lock.

"I'm starting to think you're avoiding me," Katniss says, stepping around the counter. She was not supposed to be back there and his mother would scalp him if she saw such things. But she was not there. Not now.

"I know. I'm sorry," Peeta whispers, looking down at his feet. "It's just that it's really hard on my dad right now and my brothers won't be home for another week."

"I've been home for a week and this is the first I've seen of you," Katniss says, obviously both sympathetic and angry. "I'm sorry about your mother, Peeta."

She shouldn't be sorry about his mother, not after the way the women had treated her all these years. But hearing her say the words brings tears to his eyes and he cannot stop himself from weeping into her already open arms, letting her smooth down his hair and kiss his forehead and push the tears away from his face. Anyone could come in at this moment and see they boy, they could turn the scenario into something it didn't need to be but he didn't care.

Peeta wasn't crying for his mother but for his life. For the way he'd treated Katniss, and for the pain his father felt, and in sorrow for his ailing mother who would never love anyone. He cried because he didn't know what else to do and words couldn't speak the volume that his raw emotion did.

And this is why the boy had loved Katniss they way he had for so long. Because if anyone was there, she was there. She was there to hold him and to kiss him and to love him when no one else did. This is why Peeta Mellark could never let the girl go. Never in a million years.

"I'm... I'm sorry," he gasps between sobs, holding onto the green shirt she wears as his tears stain her shoulder.

"You don't have to be strong for me, Peeta."

...

Five years.

Peeta looks at the date on the calendar, realizing five years with Katniss Everdeen had flown. The boy had blinked and suddenly this girl had become laced between every memory he's had for five whole years.

He thinks back to a time when he was only fourteen, only just beginning to think about what his life would really become. Who he would really become. Five years ago when he had met the girl who made him want to become something, not only for himself but for her as well.

Five years had been long, full of firsts and full of lasts. He wouldn't have traded a single moment. He would never regret five years. Not a single day of them.

So that night, after, when he and Katniss are tangled beneath the sheets, sweat lingering on both of their naked bodies, he shows her the tattoo, the katniss plant that he'd had for over a year and had yet to show her. Her eyes bulge.

"Peeta! Are you crazy," she screams, tracing her fingers in patterns over the markings that match the charm she wears on her neck, something he had given to her so long ago.

"Maybe a little," he admits. "It's pretty small though. Nothing really to be ashamed about. I don't know. I like it."

"Who has seen this?" She questions.

"All of my friends pretty much but that's it. Most people who see it don't even know what it is. I don't know they've never really questioned it."

"What in the world would make you do something like this, Mellark?"

"A girl named Katniss Everdeen."

* * *

How was it? Not too bad, I hope!

Thank you all for the reviews and love and support that I've received for this story! Let me know what you think and what you want to see.

There wil be about four more chapters after this one. Three more in college, one epilogue to sum up after math.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"_and if you're still breathing you're the lucky one._

_Cause most of us are heaving through corrupted lumps."_

Sophomore year: 19-20

The new school year was starting good for Peeta, his introduction from bench player to superstar doing a great deal in aiding his confidence. All the praise he got from the radio stations as well as a few parting words on ESPN aren't hurting the boy either. He tries his best to stay humble, not get a big head like some of the players on the team.

It's working well for him. Things are going well for him.

It had been tough leaving Panem after such a stay at the end of summer. Hard leaving Katniss much earlier than he had wished he would have had too but it had to be done. His brothers had come home some time in mid July, graduated with a diploma in hand, ready to handle the bakery, at least until their father could manage some time away from their mother.

Mrs. Mellark was not well, not well enough to walk without a great deal of pain and she barely even had the energy to speak anymore. This meant dinners were much more quiet and as soon as she was finished with eating whatever watered down, medicine enriched, concoction Mr. Mellark had prepared, she went right back to up to bed. She spent a lot of her time knitting and sowing and reading and catching up on all her hours of reality television. She was refusing a second round of chemo in hopes that when she died, she may have some real hair left on her head.

In the three months Peeta had spent at home for summer, he had tried his hardest to connect with his mother, feel something for her. She didn't have too much longer left, they all knew it. She hadn't met her death bed but she was coming close and they recommended they boys get everything in order.

The day the people had come to manage the will had been a hard one on everybody, mostly because the reality of the situation was beginning to dawn on all of them. Peeta didn't feel sad, just worried. He was worried for his father. His father who was losing someone he had loved and cared for all these years.

When his mother passes, he hopes it's peacefully, nothing dramatic that would scar them for life. He hopes she falls into a deep sleep, comfortable and, maybe, with a smile on her face.

...

Talk about the NFL for Peeta has been growing greater with every passing minute, every time the boy touches the ball in training camp in front of cameras. He feels like it's high school all over again except this time, there are a million other fish in the sea just as big and just as ready as he is.

He tries not to listen to what they say, mostly because the last thing Peeta needs is to get a big head, over think what he is already achieving. He's young. He doesn't need the NFL now. It will be there in another three years, once he has finished his education.

Brett and Gloss envy the boy. Peeta can tell just in the way they talk to him, the way they ride him about the few passes he doesn't complete or when the play he calls isn't a good one. But the two boys are seniors and their NFL careers don't look to bright. Gloss could get picked up, maybe.

It looked like the two of them would spend the rest of their lives in their own small towns, watching Peeta and Finnick and Thresh on the big screens and reminiscing about their own glory days. Looking at the boys, Peeta prays he doesn't end up like them. Even if football isn't in the cards for him after his last year here, the last thing he wants to do is be bitter about it.

Peeta tries not to let their comments get to him, mostly because he knows they don't mean them. They are upset. They want to be shown off. They want to be in front of the cameras where Peeta is but maybe, they were always supposed to be behind them.

But when ESPN asks if they can question him after a training session one day, he makes sure to thank the boys in his closing statements.

...

"Are you going to fucking help or are you just going to sit there," Thresh booms, looking over his shoulder to Finnick who is, of course, taking no part in helping the boys move their belongings from the dorm room to the moving truck waiting for them downstairs.

They were moving from the dorms today and to an apartment less than a mile down the road, closer to the stadium and campus. One that would actually have three separate rooms, a kitchen, and two bathrooms. It was a little pricey but the boys agreed a few added zeros on their bill was worth the privacy they had been deprived off for almost a year.

"I'm trying to catch up on my news. I will help when the program is over," Finnick answers, sipping on the beer he had smuggled from some neighbors, his eyes trained on the tiny black box reporting something on the issues in the Middle East.

If there was anything that Peeta knew about his friend it was that, in a time when manual labor was required, there would be no help. It was always guaranteed so Peeta no longer argued with him about his lazy behavior and simply looked him over. Thresh was not so patient and took three long strides over to the TV, unhooking the cable with one hand, the receiver with the other.

"We have a couch to move, Finnick," he huffs, forcing the boy up by the collar of his t-shirt and hoisting him to attention, forcing him to lug the sagging half of the couch down the three flights of stairs.

By the time they reach the bottom, all the boys are heaving as if they've run a marathon which, in Peetas opinion, they might as well have.

"Well, that's the last of it," Finnick comments, hands on his knees as he tries to steady his breathing. The truck is full, everything but their beds already packed into it and ready to go. Tomorrow, they would be living elsewhere and Peeta couldn't be happier about it.

"Aren't you guys going to miss this place?" Thresh asks, looking up at the building.

Truthfully, no. Peeta had not had a single experience in this place that would be worth remembering but for his friends sake, he agrees, nodding his head as he climbs into the drivers seat of the truck, starting the engine and calling for his nostalgic friends.

"We're off to a new adventure."

...

In a month, it seems everything has changed for Peeta. Even the things he had wished would never change.

When he left Panem to come back for training, he had thought things with Katniss had gotten better. Sure, at moments things were silent and sometimes the jokes fell short but in the summer they'd spent together, he had never felt more in love with the girl.

But once he'd boarded the plane to come back, he could already feel the air pressure between them closing in and it scared him. The further and further the plane sailed, the more and more he could feel the line connecting the two straining, just a few strands holding the once perfect line together.

Peeta was at a loss for what to do. It was rare to hear from her twice within the same day and most weekends he didn't hear from her at all. Other than a text here and there, they could sometimes go days without actually hearing the sound of one another voice. They were becoming used to the time apart and Peeta didn't want that.

His friends were little help in terms of advice, telling him it was normal to have these feelings after being away for a little bit of time. "You just got used to seeing each other every day and now that you're apart again, things are a little weird," Thresh tells him. "Don't worry. You'll get it back."

They always got it back but sometimes getting it back took a little more time and heartbreak than Peeta really wanted. He didn't want to lose her.

...

"You know what you should invest in," Finnick announces one day at breakfast, circling the table like an excited dog about to wet his pants.

"What?" Peeta wonders.

"A vibrator," he says excitedly.

Peeta stares up at his friend dumbfounded, his mouth hanging open as Finnick nods his head up and down rapidly, clapping his hands together like some type of animal. "Finnick. I'm going to pretend like you did not just-"

"Give me a second! Buy Katniss one. Make it a surprise. Send it to her dorm room and, BOOM! You're in there. All awkwardness out of the window," he explains. "Then, maybe, you two can have something to spice up your sex life."

"My sex life doesn't need any spicing up, Finn. Jesus," Peeta growls, throwing his bowl in the sink and shaking his head from side to side. He can't keep the blush off of his face at the thought of Katniss with a vibrator, cursing himself for feeling anything at the moment.

"Come on. Almost all women have them," he says. "I bet your mom has one!"

Well, there goes his arousal.

"Okay, that may have been too far but the point is," Finnick continues. "You have to be open to a lot of ideas when you're so far apart. You know, as lonely as you get I bet she's feeling the same way. The only difference being it's a lot harder for her to itch that scratch versus it being the other way around!"

Peeta puts his head in his hands, massaging his temples as he tries to imagine himself in any other room, in another world. The worst part is, it's not a bad suggestion.

...

With the help of Finnick, he does, in fact, purchase one, sending it to her dorm.

He paid the extra ten dollars for rush shipping.

...

"Peeta Mellark, what have you done," are the first words out of her mouth when Katniss calls him two days later, the first time he's heard from her other than a text about a class or what she ate for dinner. He closes his eyes, knowing instantly what she is talking about and from the tone in her voice, he knows she is not pleased about it. Not the way Finnick assured him she would be.

That was his first mistake. Trusting that Finnick was making a good judgement call.

"What-"

"Do not play dumb!"

He takes a deep breath. He should just start apologizing. That would be the logical things to do and get all of his other thoughts in order before he begins to speak.

The words are on the tip of his tongue when Katniss begins a rant of her own, not stopping for a moment to breathe, her words spewing without any pause. "Why would you buy me one of these things without at least consulting with me first, Peeta? Do you know how embarrassing it was to open this in the middle of my dorm room in front of my roommate thinking my sweet boyfriend probably bought me something nice like the shoes I wanted? Did you-"

"Finnick talked me into it!" He screams when he finally has a moment, hoping that will be explanation enough. Finnick - who Peeta had believed to be at the gym - pops his head into Peetas room, his eyebrows shooting up to his hairline as he sends suggestive winks his way.

_Get out,_ Peeta mouths, watching as he laughs his way back into the front room where, he is sure, the boy will continue listening to the conversation. But it isn't like Peeta has much to say.

"So is that supposed to make this entire situation better? Why were you listening to Finnick in the first place?" She seethes.

"I don't know. I really, really don't fucking know," Peeta mumbles, running a hand over his face. How simple it had been to punch in a little card number only to get himself into a deep pile of dog shit. "I'm sorry Katniss. I thought it could be nice."

"Nice for you or nice for me?"

Peeta hadn't really thought about that one. "Nice for you, of course," he tells her. "I don't know, a lot of people have them. And you know, I know things can get hard being so far away. Things get hard on me too so I figured maybe I could give you something to aid-"

"I don't need help getting myself off, Peeta," she snaps.

"I don't know why you're mad at me for sending the gift! I was a nice gesture," Peeta pleads. "You don't have to use it if you don't want too."

The other side of the line is silent for a long while. Peeta checks to make sure she hasn't hung up but he only finds she's been digging into him for a good twenty four minutes. Oh great.

"I'm not mad at you, Peeta. Just embarrassed," she admits. "My roommate had a forty-five minute conversation with me on how to use it as if I didn't know."

"Maybe she was trying to be helpful," Peeta suggests. He sighs. "Look, I hadn't meant for it to make you uncomfortable I just wanted to get you something that could be of use in the time I'm away. Finnick promised me it would make things better."

"Do things need to get better?" Katniss questions. When Peeta closes his eye, her perfect scowl which is forever engraved into his mind stares back at him. He can't help his smile.

"No, Katniss. I just feel like you've been distant from me. I don't want you to be distant and I figured this could be like an icebreaker of some sort," he explains. An ice-breaker? Had he really just said those words? He cringes.

She giggles. "I'm sorry if you've been feeling that way, Peeta. I'm just so busy and I know that you're so busy," she says. "This is a big year for you and I don't want to get in the way of that."

"You'd never get in the way of anything. You're the only non-football factor in my life and I actually really appreciate it," Peeta says. "You're a welcome distraction if you really want to consider yourself one."

"I miss you, Peeta," she whispers.

"I miss you too."

"Now go buy a webcam so you can help me figure out how to use this thing."

...

The day before the first game is a busy one for Peeta, one spent with a lot of time in front of cameras smiling into them as snobby reporters ask questions completely unrelated to anything from a football stand point. Most are about his brothers and their mysterious reasons for choosing not go to the NFL. A few are about his teammates. He does actually get one or two about his playing ability - not many.

By the time he's allowed to disrobe his jersey and head on home, he is exhausted. He digs his forgotten phone from his pocket, dialing a familiar number.

Peeta waits and waits and waits but is rewarded with nothing. Just Katnisses voice telling him she's busy and to leave a message. This was about the most he'd heard from her in three days.

She'd started a new job in Austin, at a newspaper or small printing company or something. Peeta can't remember. He hadn't really been listening. They talked about how excited she was and how this would really do something for her journalism career.

Peeta doesn't remember much after that. Mostly because he fell asleep on the phone a short time after, the weight of the day taking him under in no time. He'd woke up with the device still wedged between his ear, xbox controller in one hand, and a half empty bottle of gatorade in the other. This is what his life was becoming.

She hadn't answered any of his calls since then, none of his text either.

Peeta worried but everyone assured him not too.

...

They win their first game, not by ten or fifteen but by thirty, a large difference from the way they were playing the previous year.

Peeta gets a good chunk of playing time, splitting it with a senior who only came off of the bench after Peeta had successfully thrown for four touchdowns. The coach decide he couldn't do any harm to the team and put Peeta to the side for the last half, let him sit and talk to his team, some of the fans.

His parents had flown down for the game though it isn't safe to really have his mother out at events like this one. But Mrs. Mellark wouldn't have it any other way so they flew the short hour and a half to Penn to see their baby boy play. Mr. Mellark because he was proud of Peeta. Mrs. Mellark because she wanted the special treatment that would come along with Peeta.

...

That night, the Mellarks go out to dinner. The three of them all shuffle into Peetas small jeep, his mother in the back, and make their way to the nicest restaurant Peeta knows of in town, somewhere he'd been with Katniss when she had come down for her visit last March. She'd loved it.

Thinking of Katniss makes the boy lose his once prominent appetite. Still no call. Not even after the text he'd sent her to let them know that they'd won. He always got a reply to those but it seemed not this time.

Peeta tried his hardest to convince himself that she'd broken her phone. Maybe lost the charger and the thing had died on her.

_iPhone chargers aren't all that hard to find, Peeta..._

"Well, if this is not the best meal I've had in a long time," Mr. Mellark cheers, taking a large swig of the wine he ordered and another hearty bite of the steak. It had been the best meal Peeta has had too but he says nothing, the meat suddenly tasting like sand paper in his mouth. "You played a hell of a game today, boy."

Peeta nods his head, not up for much talk about football. He gets that enough on a regular basis. The only person he would want to talk football with now was his girlfriend who hadn't been acting much like his girlfriend at all.

Had they broken up and Peeta not even known it? Had he been so tired the last night they talked that he didn't hear the words come from her mouth? What was the last thing he had remembered her saying? Something about bats under the...

"Peeta," his father says, his sturdy voice breaking him from his mental lapse.

"I'm sorry. I'm just a little distracted," he admits, holding the plastic straw between his teeth as he speaks. Katniss hates when he does this. He has to learn how to stop doing this. Jesus Christ, who was he becoming?

"Probably that Everdeen girl," his mother says, her lips barely moving as she says the words. His mother didn't have energy for much anymore but she had more than enough to speak mean words about everybody who crossed her path. "I'll tell you what, I've always thought you could do better."

"It has nothing to do with her," Peeta lies, looking towards his father for help. It was clear he wasn't getting any. "I'm tired, is all."

"Oh Bannock, his sudden depressed manner has nothing to do with the girl, he is just tired," she mocks. "We've been hearing that since you were fourteen, boy. We would've thought you'd have learned we, as parents, know everything about our child's mood. What is it now?" She asks. "Shacking up with another Hawthorne?"

Peeta rolls his eyes. "That's enough, mom. You don't know anything about her."

"But I know enough. Peeta," she says slowly. "Some couples are never meant to work long distance and the sooner you learn that, the better."

Peeta had to admit maybe she was right about this. Maybe being long distance wasn't in the cards for most couples but he was determined to make it right for the two of them. Mostly because if it went the other way, he wouldn't be able to handle it. He hated himself for being so dependent on her for his own happiness but he couldn't help himself. He was an addict.

"The sooner you leave that girl in the dumps, the better," she continues, once she sees that Peeta is actually giving her words an ounce of thought. "You're young, and an athlete, and smart. You'll find another girl."

"I don't want another girl," Peeta mumbles.

"Oh look!" Mrs. Mellark says, completely ignoring his statement. "That girl over there has had her eyes on you since we walked in here. You should go talk to her, maybe ask her to dinner or something."

Peeta follows the direction his mothers frail hand is pointing, his eyes locking with none other than Madison, her hair no longer blonde but almost red, her heels hoisting her up to the ceiling, her makeup too heavy. He hadn't seen her since he returned to Penn from break but it seems she had been spending her time here. He groans.

"Look. She's making her way over here. Act charming, Peeta," his mother tells him, grabbing onto one of his curls, shifting his head until he seems to be sitting a normal position. For losing most of her strength, Peeta is pleasantly surprised with his mothers ability to manipulate his body.

"Peeta," Madison is politely, smiling to his mother then to his father who looks shaken and uncomfortable. "My name is Madison."

"Oh, how do you and Peeta know each other?" Mrs. Mellark asks, smiling at the girl in a way Peeta had never seen. He has to stop his mouth from hanging open as he watches the two exchange quick conversation with one another. He had never seen his mother act so kindly to anyone.

"Peeta and I meet last year. We were in the same biology class, share a few friends," she explains. That much was true. Peeta hopes and prays the girl doesn't expand much farther than that.

"Oh, Peeta. How come you never mentioned the girl!" Mrs. Mellark cheers, grabbing ahold of one of Madisons hands, showing the girl more attention and affection than Peeta had ever received. He turns wide eyed to his father who simply shrugs.

They talk and laugh and share a few jokes at Peetas expense as he sits there, bewildered at how quickly the two had become friends.

But then again evil knew evil.

...

As Peeta waits to pay the check, Madison comes, sits in the now empty seat beside him, perching her feet on his lap. He squirms.

"Your mother is so sweet, Peeta. I wish you'd have mentioned she was sick sooner," Madison says, honesty in her voice. Peeta curses. Everyone will know now and that isn't something he really wanted. He liked being treated normally and once people knew about the state of his mothers health, surely it would be different. But what could he do now?

"Madison, really," he mumbles, pushing her feet off of his lap.

His life had been blissful for the most part, Madison being far, far away for the summer holidays. But she was close now and there was nothing Peeta could do about it now.

"Oh, c'mon, Peeta. Don't tell me you haven't thought about my offer," she whispers, her eyes dark, lustful. Her blue eyes don't resemble the grey ones he loves so much and he's repulsed by the girl sitting before him.

"Aren't you supposed to be working?" Peeta sneers, not bothering to hide his disgusted gaze as he glares at her.

"No. I was actually on my way out for the night when I saw you come in and I knew I had to stay," Madison responds. "You know, Peeta," she starts, "it's inevitable."

"What is?" He seethes.

"Your breakup." A look of shock passes across Peetas face at the girls words that she doesn't miss. "Trouble in paradise already?"

Yes. But Madison didn't need to know that. That would only give her more reason, more drive, more truth to her words. So instead, Peeta says nothing, staring at the girl before him with cold, lifeless eyes as she drones on and on.

"We would be so good together. You, with football. Me being a cute little sorority girlfriend," she continues, her eyes twinkling. She'd obviously given it a lot of thought. "I'm the one you're going to want on your arm when senior year rolls around and your going straight to the NFL."

Peeta rolls his eyes. "No, I'm going to want Katniss on my arm when, and if, that even happens."

In return, Madison rolls her eyes, getting to her feet. "Why don't you call me when that girlfriend of your finally sidesteps out of the door?" She whispers. "You know where to find me."

He did know where to find her and he hoped he never needed to.

...

Peeta is dropping his parents off at the airport when his father pulls him to the side, a serious look on his face as the attendants tend to his mother who is making quite the fuss about being man handled. He pays no attention to it. Neither does his father. All just an attempt to get boarded first.

"Have you spoken to Katniss?" He asks, his eyes downcast, almost as if he's ashamed to ask.

Peeta shakes his head slowly, unable to stop himself as he admits to the father the silence he's received in the weeks he's been home. His father doesn't look surprised, just sad.

"How long has this been going on?" He questions.

"A good week now," Peeta answers. It had actually been six days, four hours, and thirty seven minutes but who is really counting? "I don't know what I did though. That's the thing. I don't know what to apologize for."

"Maybe it isn't you, son," the old man sighs. "The little one came into the bakery the other day asking for a job, something to do around the bakery. Can't hire her because she's a little young but I let her come in some days when your mother isn't around, sweep the porch and things of that nature."

Prim? Prim had gone to his father for a job? She was barely fourteen. She had no business having a job other than school. Peeta wants to tell his father all these things but then again, who is he to deny the girl money if she needs it.

The thought pegs at Peetas heart during his drive back to the campus. Did they need the money? Katniss was barely having to pay for anything out of pocket but was that a stretch for them? They didn't make a lot, but they weren't poor. Not like some of the people in the Seam, he knew that much. If they needed money, why didn't they just ask? Peeta had more than enough saved to help them, if they truly needed such things.

But like Katniss had told him many times, what did the boy know about being poor. Not a thing.

Maybe that is where the silence had come from. She had been embarrassed, nervous about asking for something she knew she could never repay. But Katniss wouldn't have to repay a thing, she should know that by now.

Was that it? Was it her pride blinding her from all things logical yet again?

Peeta tries his hardest not to let the guilt claw at him for the rest of the night.

...

That night he calls repeatedly, again. For some reason, feeling like his girlfriend is in danger though he knows she's not. His mind has just manipulated himself into believing it.

Nothing but the answering machine yet again and by midnight, the boy is in a full blown panic. Why? He didn't know. He knew she was safe, alive, well even. But that didn't stop the shakes from flowing through him, the blankness in his eyes, the constriction in his throat.

Surely he was having a panic attack. In the midst of it he self diagnosed himself, placing the phone on the beside table, sitting on his small twin size bed, looking around his small room which was shrinking by the minute around him, closing in on him, his body trapped in a cage.

Peeta was losing his mind. He was sure of it, there was no other explanation.

He should call someone. The small voice in his head that he couldn't block out no matter how loud he screamed was whispering to him, telling him to call someone. _Call someone. Call someone. Call someone..._

But it wasn't necessary because a moment later, impatient hands are banging on the door, loud voices from his friends on the other side begging him to open it. The door that was locked. As hard as Peeta concentrated on the small contraption that even toddlers knew how to use, he couldn't bring himself to open it, his hands not coexisting with his mind.

"Peeta," Finnick roars on the other side, his voice calling out, his hands banging on the door. "Peeta! Are you okay?"

As he opens his mouth to respond another wave of nausea and terror and doom pass through him and bring him to his knees, his hands cupping around his ears to silence his own screams that wouldn't stop.

His ear muffs are to little to muffle the sound of wood breaking the next second. Peeta feels a few pieces splinter his leg, the one closest to the door but in the moment he feels no pain. No physical pain. All he feels is emotional pain.

Thresh is breathing heavy as he stands in the doorway, his hands bloody from the force it had taken to take the door of the hinges, Finnick looking down at his friend with sad eyes. It takes the two boys a moment to bring Peeta back to the moment, assure him he's not crazy and he's in no danger - also putting no one in danger - and that he is safe. Finnick even makes it a point to wrap the boy in his arms for a moment, rock him back and forth like a child until his breathing has returned to normal, his eyes losing their gloss.

"Peeta, you need to breath or we're going to call an ambulance," Thresh threatens, phone already in hand. Neither boy knew how to really handle this. The smart thing to do would have been call for help but it was too late for that. One door was already broken, two people already bloodied. The hard part was over.

But Peeta was still agitated, his body shaking though his mind was clear. Now it was mostly embarrassment. Embarrassment and maybe the slightest bit of anger.

"Peeta, you have to tell us what's wrong," Finnick stresses, a tone that tells Peeta he has probably already repeated himself several times. He hadn't heard the boy speak. Not since he was on the other side of the door.

He looks towards his phone, the one that lied untouched on his dresser. The one that hadn't rung in what felt like years. "She won't... she won't answer," Peeta grunted, his voice dry, scratchy as if it hadn't been used in days. "She won't answer my calls and I don't know what I did or where she is and.." he trails off because he is beginning to get hysteric, his heart picking up pace, his palms sweaty, just like before.

His friends notice the change too and each place a hand on his shoulder, their eyes weary. Peeta feels like a freak show on display for the whole world to see. Had a girl really brought him to a panic attack? Had his obsessive mind brought him to the point of hysteria? He hadn't been this upset, not since he was a kid. He hates himself.

"Do we need to call your dad or brothers or-"

"No," Peeta says impatiently, shaking his head like a disobedient child. "No. I'm sorry I scared you guys. You should just go to bed. I'm okay."

"You're obviously not okay," Finnick says.

"We're not leaving you alone, c'mon man. Who do you think we are?" Thresh reckoned, his eyes moving over the room. "Why don't we all sleep in the living room tonight, just for comfort?"

Peeta is uncomfortable with the idea. As much as he appreciates his friends for being there, he doesn't need a crew to watch him. "No, man."

The three are silent for a long moment, all three wagering within their minds what the appropriate thing to say would be.

"Did you guys fight?" Finnick finally inquires, breaking the silence and Peeta out of his own battle in his head.

Peeta shakes his head. "The last time I spoke to her I kind of fell asleep on the phone."

"Maybe she's just been busy with her job and stuff," Thresh offers.

"To busy to shoot the boy a text?" Finnick asks, an eyebrow raised at his friend.

"Finnick," Thresh groans.

"I'm sorry but he-"

"I'm right here, guys," Peeta reminds his friends. All the possibilities had crossed his mind but not one had stuck. He was clueless. "I don't really want to talk about this right now."

"Do these...these attacks happen often?" Thresh wonders.

Peeta shakes his head. The two were his best friends. They, if anyone, would know if these panic attacks happened before.

"I should really just sleep it off," Peeta says once again. He was feeling tired now and all the boys had football bright in early in the morning. Maybe tonight he would be granted a full eight hours of sleep.

Finnick looks to Thresh who looks to him, both boys stuck between denying their friend of what they all needed or just giving into him. "Fine," Finnick finally mumbles. He looks to walk through the doorway, careful to step around the hinges and splinters of wood they'd left. In the morning it would all have to be cleaned up.

"Keep this door open, Peeta," Thresh jokes, smirking to himself. There was no way Peeta could do anything else. So much for privacy.

The boys leave but both wait outside the door, just until they hear the soft snore coming from Peeta. Once their sure he is asleep, they make their way into Finnicks room silently.

"We have to get to the bottom of this, now."

...

Peeta wakes with a sour taste in his mouth and a pounding in his head, his eyes not adjusting well to the light coming from his window. Light? His alarm should have went of a quarter to five. It was still pitch black outside whenever he roused himself.

In a panic, his fingers reach for the alarm clock sitting beside him, a big red eight shining in his face. He scrambles, just for a moment as he reaches for anything and everything he can see within his direct vision that is football related.

It wasn't like Finnick and Thresh to not wake him up if his alarm didn't go off or he overslept. In fact, he's furious with his friends for not waking him up. Surely, their gone. Finishing up the workout that started hours ago. Probably on their way back with breakfast and stories and protein shakes. He could punch the two in the face if he wasn't so busy trying to think about what he would say to his coach. What could he say?

There was a very small chance he would kick Peeta off of the team but there would be no end to the punishments waiting for him.

Just as he's opening the door, Finnick and Thresh appear on the other side, not in their workout clothes but in normal ones, bagels and coffee in hand as they push past the frazzled boy and into the warm comfort of their apartment.

"Hey Peeta," they both greet in unison. "We brought breakfast," Finnick continues.

"You brought breakfast?" Peeta asks in disbelief. "Where the hell were you guys? We had to be at workouts hours ago!"

"They got cancelled. Coach has the stomach bug. Didn't you check your phone?"

Of course not. Peeta rarely took the time to check his phone anymore. Every time he did he just felt sicker and sicker. But when he reaches into the pocket of his shorts for the small black device, there are two messages.

One from his coach telling him workouts have been cancelled. Another one from Katniss asking him to call.

...

"Hello?" She asks, picking up on the third ring. It had gotten close to the end and Peeta was beginning to fear she wouldn't pick up at all, that maybe he'd missed his chance completely.

"Katniss," he nearly screams before he can stop himself. "Katniss," he repeats.

"Peeta!" She says equally as excited. "Peeta, what is wrong? Are you okay? Finnick called me in a full blown-"

"Finnick called you?" That would explain it.

"Don't be mad, Peeta. He was worried," she scolds. "What's wrong?"

What's wrong? Did she really just ask him what was wrong? If he wasn't so happy to hear her voice he would be angry. No, he'd be furious.

"I..." He mumbles, at a loss for words, not knowing how he'd be able to put this nicely, without letting the bitterness he felt within him seep through into the conversation. The last thing he wanted to do was fight with her, make her angry, give her a real reason not to answer his calls any longer.

Peeta takes a deep breath before trying again. "I just get worried, you know," he mumbles. "Worried like when you don't call me for a week and can't even reply with a simple text to let me know you're okay."

Katniss is silent on the other line, sensing there is more that needs to be said. She waits to let him say it.

"You can't just do that, Katniss," Peeta continues, the emotions he didn't want coming out surfacing. He can't hide them. He was never good at hiding anything, he should know that by now. "We aren't ten miles down the road anymore. I can't go run off and find you whenever you decide you want to shut down on me. I'm trying here. I'm trying to make this work and I am stressed," he admits. "I am so stressed with everything and the one thing I don't need to be stressed about is wether or not my girlfriend is going to answer her fucking phone!"

When she stays silent on the side, he continues.

"I need you, Katniss. Way more than you need me and I know that. I know you have this whole other life you're trying to build in Texas but I need you here. Not physically, but emotionally. I just need you to be here for me and I don't think I'm asking too much but tell me if I am!" He seethes, aware of the eyes on him from the other room. But he doesn't care.

"Peeta, I'm-"

"And don't tell me you're sorry because if you were sorry, you wouldn't have shut me out for a week, dammit!" He yells, cutting her off. He can hear her gasp from the other end of the phone. "I don't know what I've done to you, but if I have done something, let me know now because I cannot keep..."

His voice trails off at the sound of sniffling on the other side, her soft cries barely there but loud enough. Peeta sits on the edge of his bed then, his head in his own hands as he, too, begins to cry. He doesn't regret his words, just the way they've made her feel. But does she regret how she's made him feel? Has she felt the same way he has, desperate and alone?

"Peeta this is so hard," she whispers through the tears. "This is all so hard and I'm so bad at this. I'm so sorry. It's not you, it's never you."

"It's hard for me too, Katniss," Peeta mumbles, careful to keep his voice steady. "I just want to hear from you, that's all. I don't need anything else."

"I'm so sorry," she repeats, like a chant. "I never wanted to hurt you, Peeta. I feel like my mother and I hate the feeling."

"You'll never be your mother," he tells her for the hundredth time.

"But I need you like she needed my dad and that scares the hell out of me, Peeta," she admits. "I never expected it to get this far, get this deep."

Peeta hadn't expected it either but he'd welcomed it. Because he loved her.

...

He won't be staying home for long, not this Thanksgiving break. They have games to play, practices to attend, places to be. So when he boards the plane back to Panem, it's already the day before Thanksgiving, five o'clock in the afternoon.

By the time he gets there, it'll be almost seven, his mother will be in bed, his brothers will be closing the bakery, and his father will be putting the finishing touches on everything before it goes in the oven for the next day.

Katniss was there too. Had been for a little over a week and his brothers had been flooding his phone with pictures of the girl in the bakery, in the library, in the grocery store. It angered him that his older brothers were getting the opportunity to spend more time with his girlfriend than he was but he tried not to let it bother him too much. Once he got there, she was all his.

The thought gets him through the plane ride, Finnicks obnoxious comments on the way home, and through Johanna and Threshs dramatic display of affection in the airport. Peeta couldn't wait till it was Katnisses turn to pick up and he could have one of his own.

He heads straight to the bakery once arriving within the city limits, mostly because he'd gotten a text from Rye almost an hour ago saying they needed some real help in the bakery tonight. Peeta laughs. It wasn't a surprise. Things got crazy around Thanksgiving.

But when he arrives, there is not a soul within ten miles of the bakery, everyone already in bed or by the fire, warding away the cold. "Rye! Wheaton!" Peeta yells upon entering as if the obnoxious bells above the door weren't enough.

"In the back, Peeta!" He hears Rye yell.

Peeta hops over the counter the way he had when he was a child, hearing his mothers voice in the back of his head as she scolds him. But she isn't here to say anything now.

He makes his way to the back, knocking once on the side of the door out of habit before entering. He had once caught Rye and one of his many girlfriends in the middle of a heated make-out session in the seventh grade and had never really been able to recover from the vivid images.

His brothers smile at him, knee deep in dough, looking sheepishly lost. They had never been all that great at baking. It was always Peeta with the magic touch.

"You're still baking?" Peeta questions, washing his hands over in the sink and taking Ryes place in making the pie crust. He'd already messed up this one pretty bad and Peeta couldn't stand to see perfectly look baking material go to waste.

"Mom wants us to open early tomorrow," Wheaton says. "Just in case but I don't see any of this being sold. I'm pretty sure the whole town already came by."

"It was only to catch a glimpse of Peeta, I'm sure," a voice from behind him says.

A smile breaks out onto Peetas face as he turns, Katniss leaning against the island in the middle of the kitchen, her arms outstretched as he launches himself into them. Things had gotten better since their teary confession. In this moment he really feels how much it's gotten better.

She kisses him softly, her lips lingering on the corner of his mouth for just a half second. "I've missed you," she whispers.

"I know," Peeta says. "Do you want to go somewhere? We could go eat if you-"

"You aren't going anywhere, Peeta," Wheaton interrupts, shooting his brother a tense glare.

"Yeah, you have to help us. You know we can't do any of this shit on our own," Rye finishes. "Katniss is more than welcome to stay but-"

"No, I do have to go home, actually," she says, meeting Peetas sad gaze. "I'd promised Prim I'd just be coming to grab some cheese buns," she tells him, holding up the canister. "But you'll come over for dinner, right?"

Peeta nods his head. He would go anywhere for her. "Of course."

"Tomorrow then," she pecks, leaving him in a rush then.

The twins don't miss the change in demeanor in their brother after she leaves.

"Don't worry, bro. There will be plenty of time to get your dick wet."

...

Peeta doesn't waste any time.

After a short, tense lunch with his family, he heads over to the Everdeen home, anxious to spend the joyous holidays with people he actually wants to be around. His brothers invite themselves and he doesn't have the heart to deny them of it. They really have grown to love Katniss and her family just as much as Peeta has.

Prim is grown, her face painted in makeup, a cloud of doom hanging over her head as she hugs Peeta, mumbling some greeting before retreating back to her new room. He looks to Katniss for help but she just shrugs, giving a dramatic eye roll and nodding towards Prims room.

"Where's your mother?" Peeta asks, the only one missing from the equation being Mrs. Everdeen.

"Where else would she be, Peeta," Katniss answers, not trying to hide the anger in her tone as she does so. Peeta couldn't blame her. He was getting pretty fed up too. "Left some time after dinner, probably about a half hour ago. You barely missed her."

"Oh darn," Peeta remarks sarcastically, sending a shy smile her way as she leans against the door, waiting to hear the soft click before sauntering over, moving her arms to wrap around his neck, her lips craning into his own.

Oh god. He could just kiss her for hours. He would kiss her for hours if it wasn't for his own two brothers and her little sister being on the other side of the door.

"We don't have long," Katniss mumbles against his lips, moving to work the green and yellow flannel from his body, her fingers moving over his defined abs. "God, I missed you."

A moment later when her own shirt is discarded, Peeta feels the same way, tremors running through him as he drinks in the sight of her naked upper body, the sweater she wore not needing a bra. He moves to kiss her again but her hands tug impatiently on his pants, then on her own.

When he pulls away with a look of hurt in his eyes, she shakes her head from side to side. "We don't have time today, Peeta," she whispers. "I just really want to be with you right now."

But when would they ever have time to fully love each other in these intimate moments like each deserved? Not this time around due to Peetas schedule. By the way luck would have it, Katniss would be the same once the Christmas holidays came. The thoughts overwhelm him and he comes out of it only when he feels her tugging him down on top of her.

Peeta couldn't live in his head. He had to live in the moment. And in this moment his girlfriend wanted him to make love to her.

So that's what he did.

...

"You should really try adding raisins to these things," Prim suggests the next day at breakfast, her muffin in one hand, phone in the other. It was her and Rorys four month anniversary, he'd learned. They were going bowling later.

"You should slow down," Peeta warns. "That's your third one in ten minutes. A record, I think."

"You should put my name on the wall and get me a certificate then," she jokes, giving him the closest thing he's seen to a smile since he's arrived.

It's Peetas day to run the bakery, Black Friday, the day before he leaves but when his brothers beg him, he can't say no. After spending all summer doing it alone, he knows how nice it can be to have a break, if just for a moment. He wasn't bitter about having to miss out on seeing his friends. He would have plenty of others time to do so in later holidays. For now, he needed to help his family, something anyone could understand.

Katniss, on the other hand, had opted to go play a game of basketball with all their friends from high-school, not leaving until Peeta practically had to shove her out of the door. She didn't enjoy the bakery but no one but Peeta really did. The last thing he wanted was for her to spend her break somewhere she didn't want to be though she assured him a place with him was better than anywhere without.

He wished that was true in so many other ways.

But Prim had joined him, mostly because she needed a ride to the bowling alley but also because she had actually grown to love Peeta. In a different way than her sister but all the same, love is love.

"I wish you didn't have to leave so soon," Prim whispers. "I know Katniss does too though she won't say anything." With a dramatic eye roll, she licks the crumbs with the pads of her fingers. "You can't really blame her for the way she is."

"I don't blame her for anything, Prim," Peeta sighs.

"I know you don't. She did tell me about the whole 'not calling' fiasco. I am on Team Peeta for that one," she says.

It's Peetas turn to rolls his eyes. He would prefer to forget the entire week but everyone was hell bent on reminding him as if the scenario wasn't imprinted into his mind. All he thought about was the seven days of isolations she had given him and how he never wanted to feel the way again. There was the ever pending sense of doom he felt, like it could happen again at any moment, this time for good.

Finnick hadn't forgotten either and in the little time he, Katniss, and Finnick had spent together, Peeta could feel the tension, as if Finnick hadn't yet forgiven the girl when everyone else had. "I'm just looking our for you man," Finnick had told him. Peeta appreciated the extra pair of eyes but the last thing he wanted was two of his favorite people being at odds with each other over something that had nothing to do with either of them.

"You don't have to be Team anyone, Prim," Peeta says after a moment. "We're fine. It's over."

"I sure hope so."

...

There was no one home when he was leaving, his parents both at the bakery, his brothers enjoying some time with some of their friends, the ones who'd come back to settle in Panem. Peeta tries not to mind it too much. All this meant was he got to spend more time with Katniss.

When she knocks on his door a quarter to right, the Sundevils cap she'd given him what seemed like a million Christmases ago atop her head, a bright smile on her face. She greets him with a kiss that leaves him wanting more.

"We have a plane to catch," Katniss reminds him, moving to grab the suitcase he brought. He's more than capable of doing it on his own but in an effort to not damage to her pride, he lets her take care of it. "Finnick and Thresh are at the Odiars so we only have to make one stop there."

"Is Annie with them too?" Peeta asks, knowing Finnick would be in a pretty shitty mood for the rest of the day if she wasn't. As much crap as he gave Peeta about being dependent and whipped, he was equally as hooked to his own girlfriend.

"I think so," Katniss says. "We're going to be taking her van so she better be there."

The drive to Finnicks is mostly silent, little conversation here and there about the weather and sports and the job Katniss has. "I love it," she tells him. "I love Austin too. I wish you could go back down there sometime soon."

"Maybe I can," Peeta says half heartedly, knowing for sure he would never be able to take more than a three day break to see her, maybe a weekend some time soon if he could manage the airfare. "Football is crazy around this time you know."

Katniss nods her head tersely. "Yeah, I know. I'm so proud of you Peeta," she tells him with a smile. "I see you all over the news. People don't believe me when I tell them you're my boyfriend."

Peeta blushes. "People don't believe me when I tell them you're my girlfriend either," he whispers, leaning over the console to capture her lips in a kiss. They've made it ten minutes ahead of schedule. There was time now.

"Oh yeah? Is it my incredibly good looks?" Katniss jokes against his lips, the words not making any sense to Peeta. He just nods.

Just when her tongue slips into his mouth, a knock on the window breaks them apart, Finnick standing on the other side with a smug look on his face, his hands on his hips like an angry mother.

"Here we all were, worried that maybe you two had gotten yourselves into some kind of trouble. Low and behold we find you in my front yard, tongues down each others throats and who knows what-"

"Oh Finnick, leave them alone," Annie calls from behind him, running a hand up his side as he pulls her closer.

"Yeah, leave us alone," Peeta grunts, shoving his friends shoulder and moving from the car, grabbing his bags from the backseat. "We are not late either."

"On time is late. Didn't Coach ever teach you anything," Thresh comments from his place on the porch.

"He came by the store yesterday," Annie says. "Probably looking for you boys though he'd never ask."

Peeta regrets not seeking the man out during his short stay. He would make time for Haymitch. How could he not? The man was the reason for everything he is.

"Well he'll still be around for Christmas," Katniss says as if reading his thoughts, putting her hand in his, sending shy smiles all around. "Now, we really do have to get this show on the road or we won't make it."

They pile into the van, all of them, Thresh in the very back, angry and annoyed, while the couples sit next to each other in their respective spots. Peeta looks back at the man, catching his scowl in the rearview mirror as he twiddles with his phone, obviously in a heated conversation with whoever was on the other side.

When Peeta looks down to Katniss in the passenger seat, she shrugs. "Probably Johanna," she mouths. Peeta nods. He assumed that was over for good. The last he heard she had a new boy in Colorado where she was going to college. He hadn't gotten a chance to speak to her this break so maybe that had ended. Things seemed to change quickly within this group.

"Stop!" Katniss screams suddenly, throwing her arms forward in exaggeration as in to stop herself. Peeta slams on the breaks, sending everyone forward, into the seat in front of them, Peeta into the steering wheel hard.

"What?" Peeta questions loudly, looking around for any signs of danger, whatever she saw and he didn't. But their on a deserted road, no one around but miles and miles of high trees, all their leaves trickling down as fall comes to an end and winter begins.

She gives him a shy smile, moving around his body for the control switch on the radio, turning the volume up as high as it will go. "I didn't mean literally," she whispers embarrassed.

"Oh my god!" Annie calls in the back just as loud, a smile forming on her face as she disentangles herself from Finnick who had caught her in an effort to ensure she didn't hit the windshield.

"What?" Thresh asks bewildered, his breathing uneven, his eyes frantic.

"Listen to the song!" Katniss exclaimed, her eyes going wide as the music begins to fill the car now.

"I haven't heard this song in forever," Finnick chuckles after a minute, his once annoyed expression being replaced with one of amusement.

Peeta can't help but smile too at the look that passes over his girlfriends face, her hands going to her sides in a dramatic gesture, her head tipping to the side to flip her long, dark locks that were let down for the day.

"_My loneliness is killing me_," she sings, loudly, but probably better than Britney Spears. Peeta laughs, loving the carefree Katniss he gets to see now.

"_I must confess, I still believe,_" Annie pipes, bouncing to the beat in her place in the back, shoving Finnicks shoulder.

"_Still believe_," he shouts in an amazingly high falsetto. Everyone in the car turns to look at him with a look of amusement on their faces. Finnick just smirks.

"_When I'm not with you I lose my mind_," Katniss sings.

"_Give me a sign_," Thresh rasps in the back, not even able to finish he's laughing so hard.

"_Hit me baby one more time_!" They all shout in unison, sounding completely off tune, something short of a dying whale and two cats mating. But they laugh. Laugh hard to the point where tears are running down their faces.

These are the moments Peeta lived for. This is what made it all worth it.

"Would you guys still be my friend if I told you I know all the choreography to this album," Katniss laughs.

"Hello no!" Annie pipes up, wiping the tears from her cheeks. "Britney is queen."

"Always has been, always will be," Thresh agrees.

Finnick and Peeta both turn to look at their friend, shaking their heads from side to side.

"I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that," Peeta whispers.

"You might as well turn your balls in now, man," Finnick urged.

"Don't pretend like you guys didn't love Britney Spears when she was popular," Katniss broke in, buckling her seat belt as Peeta started the car because, by the time displayed on the dashboard, they were really going to be late.

"I was Team Justin," Peeta jokes, sending Katniss a smile. "I had to stick with my boy on that one."

"Oh, I almost forgot about your unhealthy with Justin Timberlake. Please excuse me," Katniss smiled, crossing her arms over her chest as she leans into her seat.

Peeta can't keep the smile off of his face for the rest of the day.

...

"You know, I'm getting real tired of all this resistance, Peeta."

The voice makes him cringe, a fresh layer of cherry flavored gloss covering his exposed ear, sending a shake wave through him - the bad kind.

"Jesus Christ," Peeta groans, jumping up from his seat in the library, his books along with the iPod he was listening to fall to the floor with a loud smash. "You can't sneak up on me like that."

"Sorry," Madison whispers, taking a seat opposite the boy. "I actually did come over here because I needed help."

Peeta looks up at her through his eyelashes. He tries to judge her face, judge her reaction. He doesn't know her well enough though, to know if she is joking or being serious. His gut tells him to be on the defense. He always listens to his gut.

"Oh, stop looking at me like that, Peeta," she snaps. "I'm not always after your dick though if that is on the table, I'm more than willing." She laughs but after the look of pure disgust that passes over Peetas face, she stops, her lips coming into a stiff line, her eyes losing the sparkle they once had. "Oh c'mon. Learn to take a joke. I'm not that bad if you had bothered to get to know me."

"I might have wanted to get to know you if you aren't so crude and obnoxious," Peeta tells her. "Not in the way you want but maybe we could be friends."

"And we can't be friends now?" Madison asks with mock confusion.

Peeta looks at her, deadpanned. "I'm not even supposed to be talking to you," he says honestly, remembering Katnisses harsh words months ago. He hadn't been speaking to her, not unless absolutely necessary.

"What girlfriend doesn't know won't hurt her," she offers, her eyebrows shooting up. "I commend you for being so faithful. A lot of men wouldn't waste their time on a girl so far away."

"Yeah, well, Katniss isn't just any girl," Peeta mumbles. "We've been together for a long time, you know. I just can't see myself with anyone else."

"Have you ever been with anyone else?" She questions.

Peetas face blushes. "In what way?"

"In a sexual way," Madison whispers seductively, leaning across the table, coming uncomfortably close to his face. He can smell the gum on her breath and the small scent of her lip gloss. He doesn't like this.

Just when he opens his mouth to speak, a hand claps him on the back. Looking up, Brett, Gloss, Brutus, and Finnick take a seat. Peeta looks to his best friend in question.

They had an exam to study for and originally, it was only supposed to be them so they might have a shot at getting some real work done. With everyone else seated at the table, Peeta loses faith in getting anything accomplished.

"Oh, hey, Madison," Brett greets. "I didn't know you would be joining us."

"Neither did I," she says, not bothering to hide her annoyance with the crowd forming. No doubt she'd hoped she'd have Peeta to herself, at least for a little while. Make her move without extra eyes to watch her but it didn't seem that would be happening. "I saw Peeta sitting here all alone and couldn't resist coming to sit with him."

"I'm sure you couldn't," Finnick mumbles, mostly to himself but Peeta picks it up. He can't help but smirk.

"So what were we talking about?" Gloss questions. "You guys seemed pretty entranced."

"Big word," Finnick jokes. "Where'd you learn that one?"

"Yeah, yeah. Eat my shit, Finn," Gloss growls.

"We were just talking about Peeta and his girlfriend," Madison says, winking.

"Katniss?" Brett says. "Yeah, she's cool. Pretty hot, too, Peet. I see why you keep that around."

Peeta smiles, watching the look of anger pass over Madisons face, her hands clenching and unclenching. "She isn't all that pretty," she seethes.

"Prettier than you," Brutus says, mostly joking, but it still manages to piss Madison off and entertain Peeta.

"Don't you guys think that Peeta should dabble?" She asks. "I mean, he's been with the same girl since high-school. He should try something new."

"I don't want anything new," Peeta mutters through gritted teeth. "Thank you for your opinion though, Madison."

With that, she leaves. Her strawberry blonde hair following her like gold light as she almost runs from the library, not saying a word to the boys. Peeta just watches her go.

"She's a drag, no?" Brutus finally mumbles once Madison is no where is sight, far, far away.

"Complete bitch," Gloss agrees. "She's just really fucking hot."

Peeta tunes out the conversation once it picks up on some sorority girl that Brett fucked last week. He doesn't care to hear the raunchy details like his other friends, his nose in the book he'd been studying, his eyes shifting over to his phone which vibrated every once in a while with a text from Katniss.

"Peeta!" Finnick calls loudly, his hand coming down on his wrist.

Peeta jumps, almost falling back in his chair but managing to correct himself before causing any embarrassment. No doubt he would be the laughing stalks of social media.

"I said, we're going out tonight and we wondered if you would like to come," Brett huffs, obviously annoyed with the boys absence.

"No thanks," Peeta mumbles. "I have to rest up for practice tomorrow. Didn't do so hot today." He choses to avoid the preachy talk, not mentioning that the other boys should also get their asses to bed versus getting blackout drunk. He's surprised Finnick agreed to such things; he, at least, was always pretty responsible. Not Peeta responsible but, responsible.

"Whatever, man."

...

Thresh and Johanna begin to date again, officially.

The boys are sitting at dinner when Thresh tells them, not sparing all the details about their reconciliation when they were both in Panem.

Peeta is genuinely happy for Thresh. He had been a wreck when they'd broken up all those years ago but, really, they never stopped seeing each other. They just didn't put labels to what they were which was a tricky thing to do in college. But Thresh was always happy with Johanna, even if they did fight.

He saw a change in her and a change in him, both for the better. They balanced each other. And Peeta was happy to see his friend happy, smile on his face as he pronounced to the whole football team he was off the market.

There are a lot of protest from within the crowd. Thresh was pretty popular, not a bad looking guy, fun to be around. He had no shortage of female admirers, not shortage of sorority sisters on his trail.

"I don't care about any of them," he says. "I only want to be with Johanna. I've known that for a long time."

"You Panem boys and your girlfriends," Darius, a red headed boy on the team, huffs. "You guys just can't let em go."

Peeta didn't know the boy that well. Other than the occasional conversation in the shower or by the water cooler.

"Cause Panem produces some very attractive, very sweet, very patient women," Finnick says, throwing his hands behind his head like he is posing for a women's magazine. "We don't need to set em' loose."

"Can't argue with that," Brett says, bringing an arm around to hold Peeta close. "Our QB over here has a straight dime."

Peeta smiles, not caring what the boys say because Katniss was his.

She always would be.

...

When his coaches finally mention to Peeta he has a real strong shot of making it in the NFL, he almost doesn't believe them.

The team had a good season, one better than previous ones. Nothing extraordinary but it definitely put their names back on the board, made them more of a household name. They were no longer swept under the rug. All because of Peeta but he would never take credit for it. He was much to humble.

But soon enough, he is in the newspaper almost every week, his face on every page of the sports section, the local TV news wanting to do a story on him.

Then ESPN calls his parents, asking their permission to do a story on the boy, his backing, the bakery, his rise to stardom. He almost can't believe it. It all seems like a dream, one he'll wake up from at any moment.

"You'll never believe what I'm doing," Katniss tells him one night on the phone. He can hear the humor in her voice.

"What?" He asks, toying with the remote, trying to find something to watch other than the Real Housewives of Wherever-the-fuck they were.

"I'm watching my incredibly sexy, boyfriend on the TV right now, throwing around balls to his sweaty, significantly less attractive teammates," she laughs.

"You're kidding," Peeta says, sitting up in his bed, a hand in his hair. He was used to seeing himself on local television. Football was all this state had to look forward too. But being on in Texas? Did that mean he was on national television?

Just as Katniss begins to answer him, he hears Finnick shout from the other room, Thresh too as they parade around the living area, their loud noises surely going to piss off the old lady downstairs. Peeta runs to the area, heaving by the time he gets there, Katniss in his ear asking him if everything's alright, his friends jumping up and down like idiots.

"Peeta," Finnick shouts when, finally, he notices the boy there. "Look! Look!" He says, pointing to the large flat screen that is mounted on the wall.

And there he is. Peeta Mellark on ESPN. The picture he was forced to take freshman year upon arrival on the bottom of the screen as the commentators discuss strategy, his movements, his plays.

"Katniss we made it!" Thresh screams and Peeta listens to Katnisses soft laugh on the other end, smiling at his friends excitement.

And this is why they would always be his friends. His success had really nothing to do with either boy but here they were, both celebrating as if it was them.

Peeta falls asleep happy that night.

...

Peetas first week back in Panem for Christmas break is quite lonely, classes in Texas not being let out for another week meaning Katniss was spending her days there in the warm sunshine. Looking out at the snow from the couch, Peeta was quite envious whens he relayed to him that it was nearing eighty degrees where she was.

He talked himself out of working at the bakery, telling his father he needed a break from work. He had been doing enough of it back at Penn and needed just one week to relax. His father bought in easily to the excuse. His mother not so much.

"You need to be pulling your weight just as your brothers are doing," she scolded. "Do you think it's fair to them that they slave away their lives in the bakery while you lie around here eating all day?"

His brothers tried to defend him, tell them it was okay that he was gone if only for a week. But she wouldn't hear any of it.

"You think because you're famous now that you don't have to work," Mrs. Mellark seethes. Peeta cringes at the work famous though that is what he was quickly becoming.

He never wanted to hear anyone close to him say it. He was having a hard enough time adjusting to the camera phones that came out wherever he went or the time in the grocery store last week when a preteen girl burst into tears at the sight of him. The last thing he needed was his own family reminding him of his ever growing fame.

"I don't think that, mom," Peeta mumbles. "If it's really that important to you, I can take over one of the boys-"

"Nonsense Peeta, you deserve some time away," Mr. Mellark interrupts, sending his wife a look that will quiet her, at least for now. "He'll be home for a whole month, dear," he tells her. "One week away won't kill the business."

No, it wouldn't. His mother would do that all on her own.

...

It's not until Christmas Eve that Peeta can tell something is wrong with Katniss, the way her eyes hang low whenever they are together, her hands shaking and he knows it isn't from the cold.

But when he asks her, she turns away, telling him that it's nothing. Peeta tries to recall the last time he had seen her so visibly down. The anniversary of her fathers death? Her fathers birthday? Her parents anniversary? All revolved around one factor but never had he seen her this way during the Christmas holidays. It was always one of her favorites.

So that night when they are in his bed, Peeta inside of her, her on top of him, he can't help but ask her to go slowly, to make the moment last.

"We don't have to rush anything," he grits through his teeth trying his hardest to keep his composure. He runs a hand through her hair, the silky waves that fall down her back, covering her breasts, almost like a mermaid.

"Don't you want to fuck," Katniss breaths, slowing her rhythm down until she's stopped moving completely, her breath coming out in short pants.

Peeta shakes his head. For the first time in his life, he doesn't really. "I want to make love to you the way you deserve."

And he doesn't know why those words open the flood gates but they do, Katniss pulling off of him and running to the bathroom, locking the door with a soft click as Peeta lies, naked and exposed atop his covers until, finally, he gets the right mind to move. Reaching for his discarded boxers, he calls out to her.

"Katniss," he calls quietly, knocking on the door as he listens to her soft cries on the other side. "Katniss, did I hurt you?"

"Go away!" She screams, her voice cracking under the pressure, her cries louder now.

"Katniss, I'm not going anywhere. Please talk to me," he pleads, his head resting against the door frames. Peeta listens to the clink and clatter, the sound of the shower mixing with the sound of her cries until they both run together.

She's blocking him out in his own home and he feels helpless to the situation.

Katniss finally remerges a whole hour later, dressed in one of Peetas dress shirts, clothes in hand, hair wet. She says nothing as she moves around the room, leaving him to his own devices as he sits there watching her.

"Are you going somewhere," he asks once he sees her preparing her bag. She had told him she would spend the night, his mother at the hospital for some tests, her mother not really caring where she was.

"I need to go home," she mumbles. "Prim needs me to go home."

"Is that what has you so upset?"

She shakes her head. "No, Peeta. I just really need to go home," she snaps, moving over him to grab her jeans.

When she turns to tug on her boots, Peeta grabs onto her arm, finally forcing her to look up at him, eyes puffy, lips worried between her teeth. Katniss was never any good at hiding things from him and he wasn't good at hiding things from her.

"What's wrong?" He worries, his eyebrows knitting together, hand coming to rest on her hip though it falls on her flat stomach. At this she flinches away.

"Don't touch me right now," Katniss whispers. She doesn't want him to touch her but moments ago they were having sex? Seemed odd.

"Katniss, whatever it is-"

"I'm late."

...

He didn't know what late meant, not at first. It was only when she broke down into tears a moment later, her head in her hands, screaming about her inability to be a mother at nineteen did he understand. She was late.

"How late?" Peeta asks, his hands shaking. He tries to sound strong but from the desperate cry she gives, he's unsuccessful.

She's a week late, not too much but enough to cause her some worry.

"But I thought you were on birth control," Peeta mummers, following her suit and joining her on the ground, his hands coming to pull at the unraveling carpet which, in the moment, was an accurate portrayal of his unraveling life.

"What are you suggesting Peeta?" She seethes, her eyes flashing up for a moment, hard and angry and closed off. All things Katniss rolled into one.

"No. NO," he nearly yells, jumping to defense as his hands secure themselves around her slim arms.

"I said not to touch me!" She screams, scrambling away from him as if he'd hit her, as if he caused her physical harm. "Are you trying to suggest I trapped you?"

No. Peeta was never trying to suggest that. He simply wondered how they'd fallen into the 1% category when it had worked for them for so long. Thoughts of his mother creep into his head...then his father...then his brothers warnings and the minutes it takes for him to sort these thoughts is long enough for Katniss. He finally breaks from his moment when he hears the door slam.

As fast as his legs can move at the moment, he's after her, nearly running down the hallway, knocking over an expensive lamp his mother would surely yell at him for. But she wouldn't be yelling about just that...

"Katniss!" He calls after her, chasing after her retreating figure but it's too late. She's gone. Her lights shining in the distance as she speeds away, much faster than she should with the amount of ice on the roads.

Peeta takes a moment to sit in the snow.

...

He doesn't know exactly where he is going. Not at five in the morning but after spending hours in the safety of his own room, he had to get out.

Katniss hadn't answered a single one of his texts, not one of his calls. He would go by her house but he knows that will just upset her even more. And pregnant women aren't supposed to be upset...

Where does he go? Where does he feel safest?

His car moves before his mind does and before he knows it, he's standing outside the Cartwrights, knocking obnoxiously on the door waiting for someone to answer. When Mrs. Cartwright finally does, she looks at Peeta with worry, her eyes taking in his form as he stands before her.

"Peeta, are you alright?" She asks, stepping forward and rubbing the boys bare arms. Oh. That's what he'd forgotten. A jacket.

"Is Delly home?" He asks quickly. "I really need to talk to her. I need to talk to her right now."

Mrs. Cartwright nods her head slowly, inviting Peeta inside as she wraps a blanket around his shoulders. "Let me go wake her," she whispers timidly, as if she's thinking about telling the boy she's not home.

Peeta says nothing, just stands in the doorway, comforted by the wool blanket but not by the burning in his heart. He feels sick, as if at any moment he'll throw up. He wouldn't be surprised if he did.

"Peeta?" A voice breaks him from his thoughts, Delly standing before him in her robe. "Peeta, what's wrong? It's five-thirty."

"I need," he begins but breaks off seeing Mrs. Cartwright standing in the door. As much as he probably should speak to an adult and as nice as the older women was, he didn't wish to share the story with anyone other than Delly - maybe Finnick - for now. "Can we go to your room?"

Delly nods, taking him by the arm and leading him up the stairs. Mrs. Cartwright doesn't follow them. They've been friends for so long, there is no longer any need for worry.

"Peeta, look at me," Delly says once the door is closed. "What's happening? Are you alright?"

Peeta nods his head, thinks for only a moment then shakes his head. Of course he's not alright. He's never felt more... The thing was he didn't know how he felt.

"I..." he begins, unable to meet his friends eyes. She'll be ashamed of him. Everyone will be ashamed of him.

"Peeta," she warns.

"Katniss..." he tries again. "She's... She's..."

Delly doesn't need any more explaining and her eyes go wide, a gasp falling from her lips before she has realized what she has done. She tries to cover it up the best she can but she doesn't do a very good job.

"Oh God, she's pregnant," she mumbles, a hand coming to Peetas back to rub smooth circles.

Peeta shakes his head. "Just...late," he says. There was a difference. Right?

"So she hasn't taken a test yet, no?" Delly questions. Peeta shakes his head. "You know, it's not strange for girls to be a little off."

It wasn't unusual but it was unusual for Katniss.

"Were you guys not using condoms?" She presses, sounding more like a counselor than like his childhood friend.

"At first," Peeta whispers. "She's been on the pill since junior year and, I don't know. It was working." He hears how stupid he sounds.

"Pills can offset a girl sometimes too," Delly assures. "You really need to take a test to be sure. I can go get one for you if you'd like."

Peeta would really like that. How would it look, him walking into a store to buy a pregnancy test? Everyone would know who it was for. Everyone would know it's him. "Would you?" Peeta asks.

Delly nods her head, offering him a small smile.

"Everything will be okay."

...

Everything was not okay. Two days later and he still had not heard from Katniss. The one time he did go to her home, she wasn't home. Prim had told him she was out with friends but Peeta knew she was hiding. Hiding where, he didn't know.

The day he and Delly go to get a pregnancy test, it's a cold one. Both having to sneak away from the rest of their friends, go to a general store twenty miles outside of town, just to be sure.

The ride is silent, awkward, filled with a few tense words. Delly has run out of encouraging things to say and Peeta has lost his ability to speak. Dreams of unborn children had been filling his mind lately. He can't remember the last time he had more than four hours of sleep.

When they get to the Walgreens, it's empty for the most part. Just an oddly familiar Mustang sitting in one of the parking spaces, a few mini vans. Nothing to raise any alarm but even so, Peeta puts on a baseball cap and sunglasses.

"Which one should we get," Delly asks, looking at the wide range of ones they could look for ranging from ten dollars to almost fifty.

"Maybe we should just stock up on the cheap ones, four or five of em, you know?" Peeta suggests. It seemed like the best bet though he never believed he would have to take a chance on something like this.

Delly nods, grabbing a few off the shelf, putting them discreetly into her basket and moving around Peeta into the next aisle. "I need to pick up some shampoo while we're here so I'm going to-" she's cut off as the basket tumbles to the floor, a stranger mindlessly walking into the small girl, the tests scattering all over the tile. Peetas eyes widen.

"Shit," he curses below his breath, first attending to Delly, then to his desired item. But it's already been retrieved for him and when he looks up, he stares into the eyes of none other than Gale. Fucking. Hawthorne.

"Gale," Delly squeaks in surprise, grabbing the tests from his hands and shoving them beneath her shirt. "What a surprise!"

"So you finally knocked Everdeen up, huh," Gale smirks, wiggling the purple packaging before Peeta who sees nothing but red. What kind of luck did he have?

"That's none of your-"

"Actually there for me!" Delly pipes up, cutting of Peeta thus ending the heated confrontation that was bound to happen at some point.

It's clear Gale doesn't believe her but he says nothing, relinquishing the item back to her, obviously not having the heart to be a dick, at least not to someone as sweet as Delly.

"Well good luck with that," Gale mutters to Delly but his eyes locked on Peeta. "What a shame. Such a waste of talent."

This plucks at Peetas heart strings but he tries his best not to make a spectacle out of it. The last thing he needs to do is give Gale the satisfaction of knowing he's hurt him in any way, shape, or form.

"Good luck," he whispers, finally moving to leave. "You know, with the baby and all," he says, looking directly at Delly who nods, giving him a sad, convincing smile.

"Let's go!" Delly screeches once their out of ear shot.

...

He shows up unannounced that night, not waiting for Prim to invite him in or even open the door all the way. Simply walking past her and into Katnisses room where she lies, watching trash on the television. Upon seeing him she sits up.

"PRIM!" She screams at the top of her lungs, a frightened looking Prim coming into the doorway.

"He just barged in here," she defends, looking to Peeta with sad eyes.

"She's right," Peeta says. "I did. Prim, please go. Katniss and I need to speak for a moment."

Without a word she shuffles away, her head down as she hesitates before closing the door behind her, leaving them alone.

Peeta holds up the bag of pregnancy tests, his eyes hard. "You need to take these," he says finally, holding them out to her.

Katniss looks at him with sad eyes, obviously not in the mood to fight him. Not today. She grabs them wordlessly, going into the bathroom. "Do you want to come in with me?" She asks, her head peeking out from behind the door frame like a child. For someone who had been ignoring him so much, she sure wasn't all that angry to see him.

"Do you want me in there?" Peeta asks. She nods so he follows her, standing awkwardly as she pulls the first one from the box, squatting over the toilet.

They have to wait five minutes between each one or so, that's what the box tells them. She pees on all five and they have nothing to do but wait, Peetas heart beating so loudly he can hear it, Katniss chewing on her nails.

"What are we going to do if those things say I'm pregnant?" Katniss finally asks, unable to look up.

"Whatever you want to do," Peeta rasps, his voice failing him in the moment. But truthfully, he didn't know what the hell they would do if that little plastic tool showed up with two blue lines within the next two minutes.

"I can't be a mother," she whispers so low Peeta almost misses it. She'd said this before but that was before and this was now and there was a big possibility she might have to be. But then again, she didn't _have_ to be.

But Peeta couldn't be a father either. Not now, not at twenty. He didn't know how to take care of himself, let alone someone else. But what would he feel if nine months from now, there was a little baby in his arms with brown hair and blue eyes? He couldn't not love it. He couldn't not love something that was both him and-

Her sigh breaks him from his thoughts, his eyes going up to her face where she sits, shorts still at her ankles, test in hand, one hand covering her mouth.

Oh no. Oh god. Oh-

"We're safe," she mumbles, going to clutch her chest. "We're good. I'm not... I'm not..."

"You're not," Peeta repeats, the words coming from his mouth, a smile spreading across his face. Should he be smiling? Was that appropriate? But looking up at Katniss she was doing the same, launching herself into his arms without a second to waste, her tears making marks on his shirt.

"Oh god, Peeta," she cries into his neck. Happy tears this time. "You don't know how-"

"You can't just run away, Katniss," Peeta says, crying too. "We have to be in this together. What would've happened if-"

"I know, I know. I just thought you were trying to accuse me of-"

"Never, Katniss!" He shouts, cutting her off yet again as their lips meet.

It takes them what feels like hours to finally stop crying, stop telling each other how much they love one another, and just calm down, retire onto her old bed and relish in the feeling of being in each others arms.

"I love you, you know," Katniss finally says. "I want it to be you, if anyone."

He's not sure what this means but it sounds nice enough.

"Me too."

...

Before he knows it, he's back on a plane, heavy mind and sweaty palms.

Katniss hadn't come to say goodbye at the airport. Prim was sick with some kind of stomach bug and couldn't hold anything down. Peeta knows this is true being he had been over the night before to spend his last remaining hours in Panem with the only reason he still came home to Panem.

But still.

...

"They want you to do a magazine cover," coach tells him one day after practice, January coming to a close as was the season.

"They?" Peeta questions.

"Some sporting magazine is running a big article on you," the man explains, pulling Peeta off to the side and away from his teammates. "Of course, you won't be paid for it but it would be good notoriety."

Peeta didn't want nor did he need any notoriety. He was a private person, at least that's what he liked to believe. The last thing he wanted was to give someone introduction into his life, his family, his friends. It's when that starts to happen that things get blurred, lines get tricky, relationships fall apart.

His relationship was falling apart all on it's own and the last thing he needed was nosey reporters digging into his past for the sake of getting a crappy news story for their crappy articles.

"I don't know why people are so interested in me," Peeta admits, looking sheepishly at the turf below his feet. "I'm not all that special."

"That's just it," coach responds. "You don't see how special you are. You aren't a showboat, you don't go out, you play a goddamn good game of football. You're an all American boy. People want to be like you and the media just wants to make people want to be like you."

A good American boy who just, almost, got his high school girlfriend pregnant...

Yeah. Seems about right.

...

It is actually Katniss who convinces him to do the cover. "What'e the harm in it?" She says. "I can get a poster made, put it up on my wall."

Peeta smiles. "I don't know, Katniss. It's just not me."

"No one is saying you have to make it you," she whispers. "It's one time, Peeta."

"Finnick would be much more made out for this," he argued. Finnick was made for this type of stuff. If the magazine had any type of management, they would absolutely put Finnick on the cover. That would sell.

"No," Katniss corrects. "They want you on the cover. Do it, Peeta! Please."

...

"Okay Mr. Mellark, now a little to your left."

It was simple enough when you hear the words. All Peeta had to do was dress in his jersey, take a few pictures, pretend to throw a few balls, answer a few questions, then he'd be out of there. Three hours top, Finnick had assured him when they'd arrived on the set earlier this morning.

But six hours later and they had yet to even get to the interview portion of the day. Peeta was exhausted, hungry, and his body was cold from being exposed for so long in the winter air.

Finnick and Thresh had come along with him, looking bored out of their minds as they sir behind the camera, eating the food that was supposed to be for the crew but had been relinquished to them after hours of sitting untouched. Finnick gives Peeta a thumbs up from his chair, encouraging him to continue.

"Okay Mr. Mellark!" The photographer cheers, snapping his camera a handful of times before, finally, putting it to his side. "I think we have what we need."

"Thank you," Peeta says, almost sarcastically. "Please, call me Peeta. Mr. Mellark is my father."

The photographer smiles, nodding his head. "Do you mind if we just knock this questions out of the way right now? It's getting late and I know you probably have somewhere to be."

Peeta had nowhere to be but his couch. He nods his head anyway.

"Okay Mr - Peeta," he croaks. "Is all the media attention you've been receiving affecting your life at all?"

"No," Peeta says. "I mean, I have to take pictures sometimes and sign a few napkins but for the most part, everything is the same."

"Do your friends treat you any differently?"

Peeta shakes his head. "Not at all. I grew up in a small town, everyone knows everyone. They all treat me the same for the most part. Sadly, I can't be around as much but-"

"And a girlfriend. Do you have a girlfriend?" The reporter interrupts.

Peeta is hesitant. "I do, actually."

"How does your stardom effect that relationship?"

"It doesn't at all. We're still the best of friends. I love her, she loves me. We've been together for four years," Peeta explains.

"That's sweet. In a time when seeing two young people stick by each other for so long is so rare," the reporter coos. "You truly are an inspiration."

Peeta almost laughs.

...

His brothers come in the weekend of Valentines Day, both anxious to be away from home now that they've been there for so long. Peeta is more than happy to see them, really missing the two in the time he's been away at school.

"Man, do I miss college," Rye mumbles, holding a beer to his lips as his eyes navigate across the bar, landing on a group of girls, obviously all in the dumps about Valentines Day, looking to drown their sorrows in cheap beer and cigarettes.

"You're telling me," Wheaton agrees. "The hottest chick I've seen in a year is probably Mrs. Dartmouth that runs the car dealership." Peeta laughs, remembering the women with her orange skin and the pungent smell of motor oil that followed her everywhere she went.

"I wish Annie was here," Finnick sulks in his seat in the booth, eyes on his telephone, most likely a text from his girl. Peeta doesn't even want to think about what it says.

Johanna was here so Thresh was missing. She'd come in two days earlier, her school having a random two week break in the middle of February so she and Thresh worked out a schedule, one that would mean they could both see each other and spend Valentines together. They were all banned from the house for, at least, six hours.

"I know. I miss Katniss," Peeta sighs, his eyes running over the missed call symbol on his phone. He would call her later. Away from the noise. Away from his friends.

"You guys are being total bores," Rye screams. "We came here to fucking party! Not to sit around and whine about our girlfriends!"

"Maybe you would understand if you had a girlfriend," Peeta teases.

"You think I want a girlfriend right now?" Rye challenges. "I'm having the time of my fucking life fucking any girl I want, whenever I want!"

"You're not fucking anybody," Finnick says. "Or else you wouldn't be so angry all the time."

"I'm not as angry as you two over here who are getting your dicks sucked on a regular basis," Rye counters. That was true but then again, no one was getting their dicks sucked on a regular basis because everyones girlfriend was millions of miles away or so it seemed.

"I don't even remember what it's like to not have a girlfriend," Peeta finally mumbles when the silence becomes too much. And he doesn't. He can't think back to a time before Katniss.

"Is that healthy for being nineteen," Wheaton whispers.

Was it? No. Probably not but it was the way things were for him and he wouldn't want them any other way. A life without Katniss wasn't a life at all, he knows that.

"You really want to live your life only being with one person," he presses again when Peeta doesn't answer.

"Yeah, dick heads, I do," Peeta curses, shooting his brothers dirty looks. Why would they think any differently? They loved Katniss just as much as he did.

"I don't know, Peet," Rye whispers. "Things have been weird for the two of you ever since going-"

"We've had a lot going on, okay," Peeta seethes, not caring to hear his brothers opinions. His brothers who had never loved anyone but themselves.

"Like?" Finnick asks. Peetas eyes grow big. Whose side was he on?

"We had a little scare," Peeta finally whispers after a while, his eyes going to the table, finishing off the beer in his cup.

No one speaks for a long time.

"A scare as in the condom broke?" Rye finally asks. Peeta shakes his head. "A scare as in you momentarily forgot the condom?" Peeta shrugs. Kinda, sorta. "Peeta, god-"

"They haven't used condoms in years," Finnick pipes up, coming to his rescue. "Katniss is on birth control and-"

"Do you at least pull out?" Wheaton screeches, his eyes going wide.

"Why would I need to if she's on-"

"Because you had a scare and nothing is 100%!" Rye nearly screams. "Jesus Christ, Peeta! You're a football star. You can't be-"

"You're acting like it's someone other than my girlfriend, Katniss, who I've been with for four fucking years!" Peeta argued. "We made a mistake, okay? Everything's fine. It was all clear. There's nothing-"

"There are a lot of things to worry about. You're never having sex without a condom again, I can-"

"Don't tell us what we will and will not-"

"Peeta we're just-"

"You're not my fucking parents so stop-!"

"We're just looking out for you! The last thing you need is to end up in that sorry-"

"Enough!" Finnick finally booms, bringing the brotherly tension to a halt. "Now is not the place nor the time to talk about this." Looking around the bar, Peeta can tell their booth is getting a fair amount of attention. Wether it's from the outburst or just because of Peeta, no one knows.

"What would you have done if you had gotten her pregnant, Peet?" Rye asks, his voice quieter, almost ashamed.

What would he have done? Moved back, no doubt. Spent the rest of his life in Panem making a healthy living with the mother of his child, take over the bakery, grow old there. Would he have been happy? Maybe, maybe not. But he would be happy with wherever Katniss was.

And wherever their possible, maybe someday, child would be.

...

It's a few weeks later when she brings it up.

"You know, I went to the doctor today," Katniss says on the other end of the phone. It was late, nearing midnight and both had to be up in the morning but neither had the heart to say goodbye.

"Are you alright?" Peeta worries. His family had not had good luck with doctors, not recently.

"Fine. They think it's the stress," she confirms. "You know, why I'm not having periods. Going so far from home, being away from Prim, being away from you. My body is just reacting to it."

"Are you going to be okay? I mean, is there anything they can do to get it up and running again?"

Katniss laughs. "More medicine but I can deal with that," she whispers.

Peeta says nothing, just listens to her breathing, wishing he could hear her heart right now like he would back home, lying on her bed, her hair covering his face, his ear on her heart, listening to the slow steady beat.

"I just don't want to mess up your life, Peeta," she stated.

"Katniss, you would never-"

"Just, let me talk," she starts. "I hate myself for doing the things I've done to you and lord knows, I'm no good at this. I don't want to mess up your life."

Peetas heart sinks. Is she saying what he thinks she is?

"Katniss," he pleads. "Katniss, you're not-"

"I'm not breaking up with you, Peeta. I just want you to know that if one day you wake up hating me, I understand," she whispers. "I'll never be able to be what you need me to be."

"Katniss, you're all I want," he assured. "Nothing else. Take everything else away from me, all I want is you."

"I love you, you know that, right?"

"I love you," Peeta confirms. "You could never mess up my life, Katniss. You are my life."

"I shouldn't be."

No, she probably shouldn't be but she was. She always would be.

...

Twenty. Peeta counts the number of candles on the cake Finnick had made for him, amazed that his best friend had actually listened when he asked for a quiet night out with just a few friends.

They all, much to his embarrassment, sing happy birthday at the top of their lungs, then force him to open his gifts in the midst of the restaurant. He gets a few shirts, a football from his teammates, a hat, a watch from Finnick and Thresh.

"Oh but that's not all," Finnick cheers a smile on his face as he points to the door.

...

"I can't believe you're here," Peeta pants, Katnisses lips moving to caress his jaw, her tongue sliding along the hollow of his throat. '"Katniss I'm-"

"Stop talking," she commands, moving down his body to shuck what little clothing he has left. She, on the other hand, is completely naked. "We have all the time in the world to talk, but not now."

When Katniss runs her hand up and down his shaft, he almost comes right then. It had been way to long. "I don't... I don't have a con-"

"It's okay," she promises, pulling away to look in his eyes. "It's okay, okay?"

It wasn't okay and his sub-conscience told him to tell her it wasn't okay. They had just feared their lives less than five months ago, this wasn't okay. But when she sinks down onto him, Peeta has no complaints. No room in him left to complain.

Home. This is home.

...

"I did actually get you a present," Katniss whispers, moving around the kitchen, preparing breakfast for all the boys in nothing but her underwear and the long t-shirt Peeta had provided. He'd already punched Finnick for staring.

"No sexual acts are allowed to be preformed-"

"Shut the fuck up, Finn," Thresh and Peeta say at the same time. He laughs.

Katniss rolls her eyes, moves to her bag and pulls the wrapping from her suitcase. "For you," she smiles, sitting on his lap, her hands going to tangle in his hair as she pulls him in for a kiss. "Happy birthday baby."

It's the magazine that Peeta had forgotten he'd even done. His smiling face on the cover, the pages that talk about him marked. Katniss highlighted here and there, mostly leaving comments in the margins about silly things he said. Peeta smiles.

"Thank you," he whispers, kissing her yet again.

"Peeta, I have some bad news but you look real fucking ugly," Thresh whispers, laughing hysterically as he pulls the magazine from his grip.

"Literally, Peeta, it's the worst thing I've ever seen in my life," Finnick jokes.

Peeta can't help but laugh, Katniss too.

He could live this way forever.

...

She leaves April 5th, on a nice day that would have made for a good trip down to the beach.

They hug in the middle of the airport, arms wrapped around each other, not saying anything for a few moments.

"I have to tell you something," Katniss whispers finally.

"If you're breaking up with me I don't want to-"

"I'm not breaking up with you, Peeta," she promises, running a hand down his face to caress his cheek. "I love you."

"This sounds like the beginning of a break up," Peeta jokes, at least he hopes.

Katniss smiles, moving away from him to look him in the eyes. "I got a job offer, internship," she starts. Peeta smiles.

"That's great, Katniss, I-"

"It's over the summer."

Peetas face falls. "Oh. For how long because I could probably go to-"

"I'm won't be able to come home at all."

* * *

How did you guys like this chapter? Leave me a review and let me know how it is.

Also, I've been looking for new books so if you have any recommendations, please let know!

Two, possibly, three more chapters left? Thanks!

Also, I'm so sad to hear about the passing of Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Such a brilliant actor! Pray for his soul and for his family and that he finds happiness wherever in this universe he may be.

-B


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